Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Have You Ever Been Alone In A Crowded Room?
.don't know what you could possibly expect under this condition.
7 reviews"I'm just fucking everything up, aren't I?"
0Unrated
This is dedicated to the Uncle Jack of my family who died a few weeks ago.
PART ONE OF TWO ( i think )
---------------------------------
RIIIIIIIINGGG! RIIIIIIIINGGG!
“Shut the fucking alarm up!” Gerard yelled, his face buried in the pillow.
After another minute he reached over the bed and grabbed the metal clock, throwing it against the far wall. He groaned and sat up, lifting himself on his elbows.
Somehow the boy lying next to him had slept through the whole loud process of Gerard waking up.
Gerard stared for a moment at the sleeping figure. His black hair fell over his face onto the mattress, eyelids covering beautiful sparkling hazel eyes. Under the covers one arm lay at his side, the other under his chest, skin sticking to skin sticking to fabric.
He made a small whining noise in the back of his throat and rolled onto his back, both hands falling to his sides until he picked one up to rub his eyes.
“Morning, baby…” Gerard said, pressing a kiss to Frank’s lips and slipping off the sheets.
The air was cold around him, but he didn’t mind. The young man still on the bed stretched and lifted a hand, stretching it out to Gerard.
Gerard pulled Frank up; who kept his eyes closed and let Gerard lead him into the bathroom gently, yawning all the way.
“Okay, there’s a step here, watch out.” Gerard muttered, pulling himself and Frank into the running and hot shower he’d turned on a minute before, their clothes already both shed before they’d gone to bed the evening before.
Frank still didn’t open his sleep-stung eyes, rubbing compulsively at his face under the spray of water.
“Mmm…” Gerard mumbled against Frank’s neck, hands sliding up his hips and rubbing at the skin along his ribs.
Frank kissed his lips then, tugging gently on Gerard’s sopping hair fallen over his cheek.
“You good?” Gerard asked once their mouths had parted.
“Yeah, I’m okay…” Frank said softly.
Gerard smiled and Frank touched his lips, feeling the softness. He trailed his fingers to Gerard’s ear and pushed his hair back behind it, kissing him again.
Gerard washed Frank out of habit, helping him wake up a little, then rinsed them both off and dried with a towel. Minutes later Frank was sat at the breakfast table, drumming the wood with his fingers and smiling when Gerard ruffled his hair reassuringly.
They were going to Gerard’s parents’ house for Christmas. His parents didn’t know Frank, they didn’t know that Gerard had been fired from his job, and they didn’t know the reason was that he’d fallen in love with one of his students.
Frank was 19, only 5 years younger, but he had been a /student/. Gerard had been a /teacher/. Frank lived at his parent's house. They never talked to him, but he spent most of his time at Gerard's.
Gerard's parents had invited Gerard and told him to bring someone special.
Frank pulled anxiously at his hoodie.
“God, Gee, they’re gonna be so pissed. It’s my fault you got fired, and gosh, they don’t even know that!” he said.
“Don’t worry, honey, Imma take care of you, l’right?” Gerard said, quickly bundling his black and red scarf around Frank’s neck.
Frank nodded unsurely and held out his hand, which Gerard took as he led him out the door.
Gerard opened the car door for him and Frank slid in the passenger seat while Gerard walked around to the other side, reaching over Frank’s lap to close the door once Frank was buckled and his legs were completely inside.
They were parked outside Gerard’s parents place almost an two hours later of Frank snoozing against the faux leather seats. Frank cringed and flinched when Gerard unexpectedly touched his arm.
“Sorry.” He apologized, and encouraged Frank up the drive with him.
He rapped three times on the wood, the doorbell broken since he was 6 and knew it wouldn’t be fixed for until the house had new owners.
“Hello? Oh, Gerard! Look at you! My, you’ve grown!” the lady who answered the door, maybe a fifty to sixty year old, exclaimed when she saw him.
“Hi, Ma.” Gerard said, “Uhh, it’s only been like four months.”
“Who’s this?” she asked, ignoring Gerard and leaning out of the doorframe to peer at Frank, who was biting his lip with his face down toward the ground.
“Uh… Mom, this is my… my boyfriend. Frank.” Gerard answered awkwardly, feeling Frank shift against him, “You know… the ‘significant other’?”
“Oh.” She stated blankly, pausing for a second, “Well, come in! Come in! It’s cold out. You’ve hardly got anythin’ on!”
Gerard pressed his hand into Frank’s back lightly, and he shuffled into the house a few steps.
“Here, here. Come in and make yourself comfortable. The others will be arriving soon.” She said, leading Frank and Gerard into the living room.
“Who?” Gerard asked, confused.
“Oh, yes, that’s right. We invited a few more of your relatives to come over and have dinner with us. I hope you don’t mind.” She said.
“Oh, uh, okay. That’s alright, we just didn’t know.” Gerard answered bluntly, “Where’s dad?”
“Your father’s out buying me some turkey stuffing. He’ll be back in a few. Well, I have to go tend to dinner, will you be okay? Frank, sweetie, Gerard can show you around. It is your house, Gerard, don’t act like a complete stranger, Gee, honey.” She sang, prancing into the kitchen.
Frank was pressed up against Gerard’s side on the sofa, not quite sure why Gerard’s mother was treating him like a child.
“Come on, Frankie.” Gerard said.
He showed Frank to an upstairs bedroom. The walls were black, the bed sheets had Star Wars characters on them, and the shelves were filled with comic book action figures. Frank paid no notice and stood in the middle of the room blankly.
“This is my old guitar.” Gerard said, letting Frank run his fingers over the instrument he had placed in his hands.
“Whoa! Gerard, this is awesome!” he said, sliding his fingers up to the top fret where a black plastic pick was stuck under the strings.
He pulled it out and strummed gently for a moment.
“You can have it if you want. I’m a shitty guitar player.” Gerard offered.
Frank looked toward him with big, slightly unfocused, doubt-filled eyes that made Gerard’s heart hurt because he knew just how many times Frank had been lied to and mistrusted people.
“Really?” he squeaked.
“Yeah, go ahead.” Gerard answered, shrugging, even though the action meant nothing to Frank.
Frank grinned and put the wooden masterpiece down, leaping over to hug Gerard, kissing him in thanks. Gerard stroked Frank’s hair, gently lowering himself down onto his back on the carpet. Frank giggled against his lips; he acted slightly childish, but Gerard loved that about him. Frank’s fingers curled around the back of Gerard’s head, tangling in the silky hair at the nape of his neck.
“Thank you…” Frank mumbled.
Gerard smiled into the kiss.
They were interrupted suddenly by a timid knock at the open door. Frank pulled away like lightning, huddling against Gerard’s side. There was a girl a little younger than Gerard standing in the doorway.
“Uh, god, Kenna! We were-“ he stopped and looked at Frank, who was cowering under his arm, “Shit. Hey, hey, hey, Frankie… It’s okay, baby, no one’s here to hurt you…”
Frank opened his mouth to protest but didn’t say anything, keeping himself securely pressed up against Gerard’s shoulder.
“Hi, Gerard.” Kenna said, waving, “And… Frank?”
Gerard nodded and managed to pull Frank from where he was lodged.
“Frank, trust me. No one is going to hurt you for that. Not here.” He said, slipping his fingers into Frank’s to help pull him up.
“Uncle Jack is gonna be here in a little while. He got held up a few hours back.” Kenna informed Gerard.
Frank followed Kenna and Gerard back into the living room. He kept a firm hold on Gerard’s arm, his tattooed fingers gripping the fabric of Gerard’s hoodie.
Gerard got him to sit rigidly on his lap.
“Chill, Fee…”he whispered, nibbling on the flesh behind Frank's ear while the few kids who had gotten there already and the relatives of Gerard’s around his age watched a classic clay animation Christmas movie.
Frank tensed for a moment, but relaxed a little when Gerard kissed his cheek and pulled him tighter against his chest.
Minutes later almost half Gerard’s family was crammed in the small two story house. Frank was twitchy and nervous, but Gerard kept him safely anchored down to him.
They both had to stand up a little later to greet everyone.
Gerard shook hands and felt slightly bad when people held out their hands to Frank and he didn’t react. A few approached Frank about it, and Gerard could see tears welling in the corners of Frank’s eyes.
He took Frank out to the front porch and hugged him tightly.
“I’m sorry… maybe this wasn’t such a great idea…” Gerard said, pressing their cheeks together.
“No, it’s not your fault… It’s mine… Jesus, I am such a fucking pansy. Go back in there… I’ll just stand out here. I’m just fucking everything up, aren’t I?” Frank sniffed, pulling up his hood and shivering in the cold.
“I’m not gonna leave you out here. C’mon. Just sit down and hold a book or something. They wont mind. My family is great.” Gerard said, pushing against Frank’s shoulder lightly.
The younger man smiled and shook his head grimly, wiping his eyes again.
“I hate this, Gee…” he said, eyes toward his feet.
“Wouldn’t it be better just to tell them?” Gerard asked, wrapping his arms around Frank’s waist as he rested his chin on the top of Frank’s head.
Frank sighed half-contentedly.
“People just don’t treat blind people the same, Gee.” he stated.
PART ONE OF TWO ( i think )
---------------------------------
RIIIIIIIINGGG! RIIIIIIIINGGG!
“Shut the fucking alarm up!” Gerard yelled, his face buried in the pillow.
After another minute he reached over the bed and grabbed the metal clock, throwing it against the far wall. He groaned and sat up, lifting himself on his elbows.
Somehow the boy lying next to him had slept through the whole loud process of Gerard waking up.
Gerard stared for a moment at the sleeping figure. His black hair fell over his face onto the mattress, eyelids covering beautiful sparkling hazel eyes. Under the covers one arm lay at his side, the other under his chest, skin sticking to skin sticking to fabric.
He made a small whining noise in the back of his throat and rolled onto his back, both hands falling to his sides until he picked one up to rub his eyes.
“Morning, baby…” Gerard said, pressing a kiss to Frank’s lips and slipping off the sheets.
The air was cold around him, but he didn’t mind. The young man still on the bed stretched and lifted a hand, stretching it out to Gerard.
Gerard pulled Frank up; who kept his eyes closed and let Gerard lead him into the bathroom gently, yawning all the way.
“Okay, there’s a step here, watch out.” Gerard muttered, pulling himself and Frank into the running and hot shower he’d turned on a minute before, their clothes already both shed before they’d gone to bed the evening before.
Frank still didn’t open his sleep-stung eyes, rubbing compulsively at his face under the spray of water.
“Mmm…” Gerard mumbled against Frank’s neck, hands sliding up his hips and rubbing at the skin along his ribs.
Frank kissed his lips then, tugging gently on Gerard’s sopping hair fallen over his cheek.
“You good?” Gerard asked once their mouths had parted.
“Yeah, I’m okay…” Frank said softly.
Gerard smiled and Frank touched his lips, feeling the softness. He trailed his fingers to Gerard’s ear and pushed his hair back behind it, kissing him again.
Gerard washed Frank out of habit, helping him wake up a little, then rinsed them both off and dried with a towel. Minutes later Frank was sat at the breakfast table, drumming the wood with his fingers and smiling when Gerard ruffled his hair reassuringly.
They were going to Gerard’s parents’ house for Christmas. His parents didn’t know Frank, they didn’t know that Gerard had been fired from his job, and they didn’t know the reason was that he’d fallen in love with one of his students.
Frank was 19, only 5 years younger, but he had been a /student/. Gerard had been a /teacher/. Frank lived at his parent's house. They never talked to him, but he spent most of his time at Gerard's.
Gerard's parents had invited Gerard and told him to bring someone special.
Frank pulled anxiously at his hoodie.
“God, Gee, they’re gonna be so pissed. It’s my fault you got fired, and gosh, they don’t even know that!” he said.
“Don’t worry, honey, Imma take care of you, l’right?” Gerard said, quickly bundling his black and red scarf around Frank’s neck.
Frank nodded unsurely and held out his hand, which Gerard took as he led him out the door.
Gerard opened the car door for him and Frank slid in the passenger seat while Gerard walked around to the other side, reaching over Frank’s lap to close the door once Frank was buckled and his legs were completely inside.
They were parked outside Gerard’s parents place almost an two hours later of Frank snoozing against the faux leather seats. Frank cringed and flinched when Gerard unexpectedly touched his arm.
“Sorry.” He apologized, and encouraged Frank up the drive with him.
He rapped three times on the wood, the doorbell broken since he was 6 and knew it wouldn’t be fixed for until the house had new owners.
“Hello? Oh, Gerard! Look at you! My, you’ve grown!” the lady who answered the door, maybe a fifty to sixty year old, exclaimed when she saw him.
“Hi, Ma.” Gerard said, “Uhh, it’s only been like four months.”
“Who’s this?” she asked, ignoring Gerard and leaning out of the doorframe to peer at Frank, who was biting his lip with his face down toward the ground.
“Uh… Mom, this is my… my boyfriend. Frank.” Gerard answered awkwardly, feeling Frank shift against him, “You know… the ‘significant other’?”
“Oh.” She stated blankly, pausing for a second, “Well, come in! Come in! It’s cold out. You’ve hardly got anythin’ on!”
Gerard pressed his hand into Frank’s back lightly, and he shuffled into the house a few steps.
“Here, here. Come in and make yourself comfortable. The others will be arriving soon.” She said, leading Frank and Gerard into the living room.
“Who?” Gerard asked, confused.
“Oh, yes, that’s right. We invited a few more of your relatives to come over and have dinner with us. I hope you don’t mind.” She said.
“Oh, uh, okay. That’s alright, we just didn’t know.” Gerard answered bluntly, “Where’s dad?”
“Your father’s out buying me some turkey stuffing. He’ll be back in a few. Well, I have to go tend to dinner, will you be okay? Frank, sweetie, Gerard can show you around. It is your house, Gerard, don’t act like a complete stranger, Gee, honey.” She sang, prancing into the kitchen.
Frank was pressed up against Gerard’s side on the sofa, not quite sure why Gerard’s mother was treating him like a child.
“Come on, Frankie.” Gerard said.
He showed Frank to an upstairs bedroom. The walls were black, the bed sheets had Star Wars characters on them, and the shelves were filled with comic book action figures. Frank paid no notice and stood in the middle of the room blankly.
“This is my old guitar.” Gerard said, letting Frank run his fingers over the instrument he had placed in his hands.
“Whoa! Gerard, this is awesome!” he said, sliding his fingers up to the top fret where a black plastic pick was stuck under the strings.
He pulled it out and strummed gently for a moment.
“You can have it if you want. I’m a shitty guitar player.” Gerard offered.
Frank looked toward him with big, slightly unfocused, doubt-filled eyes that made Gerard’s heart hurt because he knew just how many times Frank had been lied to and mistrusted people.
“Really?” he squeaked.
“Yeah, go ahead.” Gerard answered, shrugging, even though the action meant nothing to Frank.
Frank grinned and put the wooden masterpiece down, leaping over to hug Gerard, kissing him in thanks. Gerard stroked Frank’s hair, gently lowering himself down onto his back on the carpet. Frank giggled against his lips; he acted slightly childish, but Gerard loved that about him. Frank’s fingers curled around the back of Gerard’s head, tangling in the silky hair at the nape of his neck.
“Thank you…” Frank mumbled.
Gerard smiled into the kiss.
They were interrupted suddenly by a timid knock at the open door. Frank pulled away like lightning, huddling against Gerard’s side. There was a girl a little younger than Gerard standing in the doorway.
“Uh, god, Kenna! We were-“ he stopped and looked at Frank, who was cowering under his arm, “Shit. Hey, hey, hey, Frankie… It’s okay, baby, no one’s here to hurt you…”
Frank opened his mouth to protest but didn’t say anything, keeping himself securely pressed up against Gerard’s shoulder.
“Hi, Gerard.” Kenna said, waving, “And… Frank?”
Gerard nodded and managed to pull Frank from where he was lodged.
“Frank, trust me. No one is going to hurt you for that. Not here.” He said, slipping his fingers into Frank’s to help pull him up.
“Uncle Jack is gonna be here in a little while. He got held up a few hours back.” Kenna informed Gerard.
Frank followed Kenna and Gerard back into the living room. He kept a firm hold on Gerard’s arm, his tattooed fingers gripping the fabric of Gerard’s hoodie.
Gerard got him to sit rigidly on his lap.
“Chill, Fee…”he whispered, nibbling on the flesh behind Frank's ear while the few kids who had gotten there already and the relatives of Gerard’s around his age watched a classic clay animation Christmas movie.
Frank tensed for a moment, but relaxed a little when Gerard kissed his cheek and pulled him tighter against his chest.
Minutes later almost half Gerard’s family was crammed in the small two story house. Frank was twitchy and nervous, but Gerard kept him safely anchored down to him.
They both had to stand up a little later to greet everyone.
Gerard shook hands and felt slightly bad when people held out their hands to Frank and he didn’t react. A few approached Frank about it, and Gerard could see tears welling in the corners of Frank’s eyes.
He took Frank out to the front porch and hugged him tightly.
“I’m sorry… maybe this wasn’t such a great idea…” Gerard said, pressing their cheeks together.
“No, it’s not your fault… It’s mine… Jesus, I am such a fucking pansy. Go back in there… I’ll just stand out here. I’m just fucking everything up, aren’t I?” Frank sniffed, pulling up his hood and shivering in the cold.
“I’m not gonna leave you out here. C’mon. Just sit down and hold a book or something. They wont mind. My family is great.” Gerard said, pushing against Frank’s shoulder lightly.
The younger man smiled and shook his head grimly, wiping his eyes again.
“I hate this, Gee…” he said, eyes toward his feet.
“Wouldn’t it be better just to tell them?” Gerard asked, wrapping his arms around Frank’s waist as he rested his chin on the top of Frank’s head.
Frank sighed half-contentedly.
“People just don’t treat blind people the same, Gee.” he stated.
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