FicWad

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In POV of own character talking about Gerard (although technically it could be any of them…)
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I wish I’d never met you.
I wish you’d never been born.
I wish that for every lie you told me you’d suffer a thousand painful deaths.
I wish that for every time you made me believe in you a million people would loose their respect for you. No one in the world would like you then. You’d have nobody left.
I wish that that day at the beach you hadn’t caught my eye.
I wish that you hadn’t looked at me, spoken to me, swam with me in the sea, laughed and joked with me. Won me over.
I wish that I never wrote your phone number down on my hand.
I wish that I’d washed it off in the shower and never thought twice about it.
I wish I hadn’t arranged to meet you again, and again, and again.
I wish I hadn’t fallen in love with you.
I wish I hadn’t told you that I loved you.
I wish you hadn’t repeated it to me like you meant it.
I wish I’d seen the truth in your eyes.
I wish I hadn’t worn those stupid rose tinted glasses for so long.
I wish I’d seen it coming so I could prepare myself for the heartbreak.
I wish that when you said you were going on tour soon I’d distanced myself from you so that it didn’t hurt so much.
I wish that when I found out the other guys were taking their partners I hadn’t gotten my hopes up.
I wish that when I you told me that I couldn’t go I’d taken the hint.
I wish that I hadn’t been so damn foolish.
I wish that you hadn’t phoned me up 3 times a day to tell me that you loved me.
I wish that you hadn’t stopped calling eventually.
I wish I’d seen that as a sign that you were forgetting about me.
I wish I hadn’t started calling you instead.
I wish I hadn’t made myself look so desperate.
I wish that when you answered and I could hear a girl in the background I’d gotten angry and shouted at you about it instead of assuming that you’d never do anything like that to me.
I wish that you hadn’t hung up on me in the middle of a conversation one night.
I wish I hadn’t called back.
I wish you hadn’t accidentally answered it in your pocket.
I wish you hadn’t been the middle of telling her how beautiful she was and how much you couldn’t wait to get under her clothes after the show.
I wish I’d hung up.
I wish I hadn’t heard you talking dirty to her and calling her all the pet names you called me.
I wish I hadn’t heard you moan and she touched you through your jeans.
I wish I hadn’t curled up in a ball on the floor and cried.
I wish that for one last day we could be like we were that day on the beach.
I wish that one day I can forget you and what you did and really love some one again with out waiting for them to hurt me.
I wish that you didn’t keep calling me to apologise.
I wish that I hadn’t accepted your apologies and let you stay round mine when the tour was over.
I wish I hadn’t let you back into my life.
I wish I hadn’t let you back into my heart. Just for you to break in right in half again.
I wish that when we were through for sure I hadn’t begged you to take me back.
I wish that I hadn’t made such a fool out of myself for you .
I wish that I could live the rest of my life without ever seeing your face again.
I wish that I didn’t love you.
Mostly I wish that you’d loved me. At least half as much as I’d loved you.