Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Secret in Silence
i'm so sorry this took so long! i had no idea what to write about and i'm still not sure i'm satisfied with this. but seriously
GO BACK TO OLD CHAPTERS AND READ PLEASE...cause i did change quit a few things. especially the second chapter. but for now enjoy!
And the Lust it Commands
Saying the morning was awkward would be an understatement but somehow I managed through. Even as Mikey sat me down to have a “private” conversation, which I highly doubt was private seeing as I heard giggles every three seconds, my hands trembled as I remembered the dream. There were a few times where Mikey had to break my train of thought with a soft cough asking if I was listening.
I was.
But whatever phrases slipped from his mouth, my mind transformed into lustful thoughts. I could fell his eyes scanning my face for some kind of explanation. The others had too when the realized how comfortable I seemed in my state of stupor with Frank’s hands cupping my cheek. Yes, I admit it. I had no control over my nerves as they relaxed into those radiating warm and gentle palms. His touch only pulled me deeper into forbidden dream.
Again, a soft mumble reached my ears and my brother was once more gazing over my face. I was losing concentration and straining to keep a straight face as I felt heat and pressure build up.
“Seriously Gerard, you haven’t said anything all morning. Are you okay, stoned, drunk? Let me in on this. I know you’re sober but you’re distant and I can tell you’re thinking. Why are you trying to hide this?” he rushed out each word in one breath.
“Seriously Mikey, you’ve been asking questions all morning. Are you hyped up on sugar, stuck another fork in the toaster? Don’t lie I know you still do those things. Your face is scrunched up and I can tell you’re itching to know what goes on inside my head. Why do you care so much?” I mocked.
“Could you please not use your sarcasm right now. I’m just trying to understand why we have two secretive boys slugging around the bus with smiles on their faces when they think no one else notices.”
My eyes shot up to his.
Whether Mikey was telling the truth or not, he was aware of things when it came to those surrounding him. That or the smiles on our faces made us easier to read.
“I see I have your attention now. But, I believe we had this conversation the other night. So since you’re not talking, again, I get to assume the worst.” The hint in his voice was obvious. He wanted me to cave in and talk just as I did the other night. Only this time, his assumption would be accurate. So I can’t allow words portraying my dream be release.
One last disappointed look in my direction and he was gone down the hallway. The giggles had subsided and I was left in my bunk. Memories of the dream flooded my brain once more until it became overpowering. There had to be an escape, and fresh air was definitely an option.
The cool air hit my body the moment I opened the door. We had pulled over somewhere to stop for the night and build up needed energy. Lately I’ve denied myself the benefit of sleeping each night so I’ve assumed the purpose for pulling over was sorely for my case of insomnia.
I leaned my body against the side of the bus and let the moisture of the air sink into my clothing and skin. The feeling was relaxing but at the same time, it felt wrong. Each time a predicament arose between a certain someone, and me, I pushed it to the back of my mind ignoring it for as long as possible. Only this time the trial rested in my head.
My eyes slid close and I let my body fall to the ground as I brought my knees up to my chest.
“You’ve known the answer the whole time. You just seem to deny the truth.”
I repeated that same phrase over and over in my mind attempting to make same literal sense out of it. No such luck.
Earlier the fresh air was welcoming and soothed my desperate need of openness, now it was suffocating. The cool breeze no longer lessened the heat produced by my body, it sent shivers down my spine. The slow breathing pattern I had once been following turned into deep chokes. My throat became raw from the rushed sets of breath and then I felt it. The ground was wrenching my body towards hard gravel as my mind awaited the collision. Convulsions were spreading through my body and my vision become blurry.
The foggy edges of an object rushed towards my side and the presence was comforting as they held me close bridal style. I could feel the moist tears cascaded unto my face. The desire to fall back and let consciousness depart my body grew stronger as my foresight faded. One last tug and the darkness had pulled me under.
Warmth now enclosed my body and I felt myself being lifted from a bottomless pit.
“Stay strong Gee, you’ll be alright”
GO BACK TO OLD CHAPTERS AND READ PLEASE...cause i did change quit a few things. especially the second chapter. but for now enjoy!
And the Lust it Commands
Saying the morning was awkward would be an understatement but somehow I managed through. Even as Mikey sat me down to have a “private” conversation, which I highly doubt was private seeing as I heard giggles every three seconds, my hands trembled as I remembered the dream. There were a few times where Mikey had to break my train of thought with a soft cough asking if I was listening.
I was.
But whatever phrases slipped from his mouth, my mind transformed into lustful thoughts. I could fell his eyes scanning my face for some kind of explanation. The others had too when the realized how comfortable I seemed in my state of stupor with Frank’s hands cupping my cheek. Yes, I admit it. I had no control over my nerves as they relaxed into those radiating warm and gentle palms. His touch only pulled me deeper into forbidden dream.
Again, a soft mumble reached my ears and my brother was once more gazing over my face. I was losing concentration and straining to keep a straight face as I felt heat and pressure build up.
“Seriously Gerard, you haven’t said anything all morning. Are you okay, stoned, drunk? Let me in on this. I know you’re sober but you’re distant and I can tell you’re thinking. Why are you trying to hide this?” he rushed out each word in one breath.
“Seriously Mikey, you’ve been asking questions all morning. Are you hyped up on sugar, stuck another fork in the toaster? Don’t lie I know you still do those things. Your face is scrunched up and I can tell you’re itching to know what goes on inside my head. Why do you care so much?” I mocked.
“Could you please not use your sarcasm right now. I’m just trying to understand why we have two secretive boys slugging around the bus with smiles on their faces when they think no one else notices.”
My eyes shot up to his.
Whether Mikey was telling the truth or not, he was aware of things when it came to those surrounding him. That or the smiles on our faces made us easier to read.
“I see I have your attention now. But, I believe we had this conversation the other night. So since you’re not talking, again, I get to assume the worst.” The hint in his voice was obvious. He wanted me to cave in and talk just as I did the other night. Only this time, his assumption would be accurate. So I can’t allow words portraying my dream be release.
One last disappointed look in my direction and he was gone down the hallway. The giggles had subsided and I was left in my bunk. Memories of the dream flooded my brain once more until it became overpowering. There had to be an escape, and fresh air was definitely an option.
The cool air hit my body the moment I opened the door. We had pulled over somewhere to stop for the night and build up needed energy. Lately I’ve denied myself the benefit of sleeping each night so I’ve assumed the purpose for pulling over was sorely for my case of insomnia.
I leaned my body against the side of the bus and let the moisture of the air sink into my clothing and skin. The feeling was relaxing but at the same time, it felt wrong. Each time a predicament arose between a certain someone, and me, I pushed it to the back of my mind ignoring it for as long as possible. Only this time the trial rested in my head.
My eyes slid close and I let my body fall to the ground as I brought my knees up to my chest.
“You’ve known the answer the whole time. You just seem to deny the truth.”
I repeated that same phrase over and over in my mind attempting to make same literal sense out of it. No such luck.
Earlier the fresh air was welcoming and soothed my desperate need of openness, now it was suffocating. The cool breeze no longer lessened the heat produced by my body, it sent shivers down my spine. The slow breathing pattern I had once been following turned into deep chokes. My throat became raw from the rushed sets of breath and then I felt it. The ground was wrenching my body towards hard gravel as my mind awaited the collision. Convulsions were spreading through my body and my vision become blurry.
The foggy edges of an object rushed towards my side and the presence was comforting as they held me close bridal style. I could feel the moist tears cascaded unto my face. The desire to fall back and let consciousness depart my body grew stronger as my foresight faded. One last tug and the darkness had pulled me under.
Warmth now enclosed my body and I felt myself being lifted from a bottomless pit.
“Stay strong Gee, you’ll be alright”
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