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• Innocence Faded

  (#) lycus 2007-11-17

  Wow that was very...Wow i'm very impressed, I've read some epilouge stories that start out like yours but don't come close to how yours turned out. But harrys' sexual past was a little disturbing especally colin who was as much of a fanboy as ginny was a fangirl but all I ask is that you don't put as much or any detail in any flashbacks you might have in the slash department. Now I really hate ron, and I love stories that bash ron but I guess that ron is okay in this story, but I really think that ron might still feel guilty for running out on them on the horcrux hunt and feeling that he didn't get hermione on his own he might feel that someone had to cheat for him to be with her in the first place, and we all know that ron hates charity. Now who will hermione choose to be with? what will happen when the public finds out what the weasleys' did? what will the twins do when they find out that their siblings mother broke up their parents marrage? well you will just have to update now won't you, we have to know the answers, so update soon.

  Author's response

  I'm assuming you haven't read chapter two yet.
  
  Don't worry about slash, I'll say again: I don't like slash unless your talking about the guitarist. Honestly, i did the bisexual past because I like Torchwood, and Capt. Jack is my favorite character on the show, I just remembered the story about the acrobats and I was inspired. As for Colin, A) he always struck me as a bit fruity, and B) let's say Harry was getting blueballs and was desperate.
  
  As for Ron, I like him, except for his jealous/jackass streak. I like my explanation of what happened.

• Innocence Faded

  (#) stealacandy 2008-06-30

  Hello,
  
  I wanted to say, I often find that an author saying "he was listening to such and such song by such and such band, and it got him all nostalgic" and other such drabble takes away from the story.
  
  First, odds are most of your readers have no idea what you're talking about, and those who do probably don't recall the lyrics much, and can't imagine why would your protagonist have such a reaction to the song. Furthermore, in your story, you haven't established why HArry would wake up to such a song or how is it even possible that it would play at a magical area.
  
  What you might want to do is actually write the lyrics of the song, and write how it came to be - someone was humming it to himsel fwhile sitting watch over Harry's bed. Something like that.
  And use it a lot less - no more than once or twice in a fic of ten chapters with an average of 1500 words per chapter would probably be a good proportion.
  
  WHat's good with FicWad is that, as far as I know, they don't ban song lyrics in the fics you post
  
  
  
  The same goes, by the way, to writer writieng, in the midsdle of a fic, something along the lines of "compare it to this and that scene from this and that movie or TV series" instead of describing in writing what is happening. It makes for very poor fiction.
  
  Here it is the same principle.
  
  
  
  Regards,
  
  
  -s.a.c.
  
  

  Author's response

  I had lyrics in chapter three, but I wiped almost all mention of them from the story after someone complained about them. I know that Dream Theater is rather obscure.
  
  and as for Lyrics to say, 2112, Octavarium, and any other song I mention, Most of them are well past radio riendly song lengths, even if you removed the "instrumental Wankery"
  
  Other than this, I really don't know what else to say.
  
  Thank you for the review, it was well thought out, and the spelling was correct.
  
  I did explain how the songs were played, if you sctually read the story, though.

• Innocence Faded

  (#) lkngatlife 2008-07-23

  Er... The last chapter of your story isn't working right. You click on it and it takes you back to Ficwad's main page.

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