FicWad

“You ready for this?” Gerard whispered as he took hold of my hand and led me from the van to the tour bus, which was now parked in the Holiday Inn lot. The Band had chosen to stay in the area awaiting our return. We knew he needed to hurry. The next venue was over eight hours away and the concert was tonight. Gerard told me he wasn’t sure how they were going to handle the two missed dates.
“I’m ready.” I said giving him a smile.
We walked on to the bus. It say the mood was tense would have been and understatement of biblical proportions.
“Where the fuck have you been?” Ray lashed out first. Then he got a good look at us. “What happened?”
I had tried to cover the bruise on my face but with no real luck. Gerard looked worse than me.
“You fucking asshole. You hit her?” This from Frank. I was shocked.
“Frank, it’s okay.” I said softly.
He shook his head, “No, it’s not okay. What the fuck has happened to you?” He was standing in front of Gerard yelling.
“Frank, listen to me. It’s all okay. We are fine now.” I tried to divert his attention away from Gerard.
Bob stood, took one more look at us then moved down the hall to his bunk. I felt sorry that he was so disgusted with Gerard and I.
“Laura, I know he’s fucking crazy but you? What in the name of God happened?”
“I was angry and I tried to beat the shit out of him.” I said throwing the words out.
Alicia moved towards me. She reached out to move my hair from my face and inspect the bruise. “And this?”
“Gerard pushed me away and I hit the dresser.” No, this wasn’t really the truth but it was close enough. I squeezed his hand hard. I wanted him to stick to this story.
“So let me get this straight. The two of you have a domestic squabble and we have to cancel two dates?” Frank asked angrily.
“I’m sorry this is all my fault.” I looked down at the floor.
“She snapped and tried to beat the shit out of me because I was drinking again.”
Everyone on the bus grew deathly quiet. This was something we hadn’t discussed. I had no idea he was going to tell his band mates the truth about his drinking. Finally Frank spoke. The look on his face brought tears to my eyes.
“So should we cancel the rest of the tour? Is the band through? Cause I won’t go through all this shit with you again. I fucking won’t.”
Gerard met his glare. “No, I’m not going to take another drink, I swear to you all.”
“We’ve heard that before.” Mikey said softly. “You promised.”
Alicia moved to her husband’s side and slipped her hand in his.
Gerard gave his brother a pained look, “Mikey, I’m sorry.”
Mikey shook his head and looked away.
Ray was staring at both Gerard and I with a strange look on his face. Beside him Christa held tightly to his arm. “We need to get going.” He said
Frank turned on him, “Why? Wanna get there so we can cancel another concert?”
“We’re not canceling any more concerts.” Gerard said quietly.
“This is bull shit.” Frank said. “Fucking bull shit. You know at least when you were with Eve you were clean.”
Gerard grabbed him by the front of his shirt, “Never blame anything on Laura. If it wasn’t for her I’d be fucking dead right now.”
Frank looked into Gerard’s angry face. Suddenly his face lost all emotion. Gerard let him ago and he stumbled slightly. He took a deep breath then turned to face me. “I’m sorry Laura. Sorrier then you’ll ever know.” Quickly he moved down the hall to the bunk.
The rest of us stood there in awkward silence. Finally Mikey spoke, “Laura, Frank didn’t mean it. He’s just so fucking upset about Gee.”
I nodded not trusting my voice.
“We will be moving in a few minutes.” Ray said standing. He and Christa walked down the hall and into the back lounge.
Mikey and Alicia walked hand in hand towards the back lounge too. I looked over at Gerard when we were alone. “You okay?”
He shook his head, “I know how they feel. I’m a fuck up.”
“Lets go lay down. I want to feel your arms around me.”
“Yeah” he said giving me a sad smile. “I want the same thing.”

Once we were in the bunk I spoke to Gerard in a whisper. “What are you going to do about Troy?” This was something he and I hadn’t discussed.
“He’s been officially let go. I made arrangements for him to be paid his whole salary for the tour.”
I frowned, “Who’d you have to deal with to get that done?”
“Brian took care of it.”
I nodded, “So he’s gone?”
“I hope so. He was supposed to clear out last night.” Gerard tightened his arms, which were around me. “I’m so sorry about all this shit. I hate lying to my friends.”
“Ray knows.” I said softly.
“Yeah, he knows why I snapped. He didn’t know about my drinking.”
“Are you okay?” I felt stupidly naive about his alcohol addiction. I had never been around anyone with this curse. I wondered how hard would not drinking be for him.
“I’m okay right now.” He said softly.
“Look I’m as dumb as a bag of hair about alcoholism. You’re gonna have to let me know when I need to help you.”
His soft chuckle vibrated against my back. “Dumb as a bag of hair?”
I smiled, “Yeah.”
“Laura, why in God’s name would a bag of hair be dumb?”
“Why in God’s name would a bag of hair be smart?” I said trying not to laugh.
“God, I love you.” He said pressing his lips to my neck.
“Yeah, just cause I entertain you.”
“That you do, Sweetheart. That you do.”

When we arrived at the venue it was obvious the tension on the bus had not lessened. No one seemed to be talking. Gerard asked me to walk over to the venue with him. He took my hand and led me away from the bus. “This fucking sucks.” He said as we walked.
“You mean how no one is speaking?”
“Oh they’re speaking to each other. They just ain’t fucking talking to me.”
We had almost reached the building when Gerard’s cell phone rang. He looked at the read out. “Mom”
I smiled as he answered reluctantly. After a few moments it was obvious this wasn’t a happy call. I tried to make sense of what he was saying. I could tell the longer the conversation went on the angrier he was becoming. I reached out to hold his hand but he moved away.
“Fine, Ma. We’ll deal with it. I’ll call you later.” He disconnected.
“What?” I asked.
Gerard took out a cigarette before answering. I watched him light it and waited, “She just got off the phone with the police. Someone broke into the fucking house and Helen gave them my Mom’s number.”
“Wait, what? Broke into your old house?”
He nodded. “Yeah”
“So the police called you Mom about it.”
“Yeah cause Helen gave them her number.”
“So what happened?”
“Laura are you just stupid or what? I told you what happened. Someone broke into my house.”
I tried not to snap back at him. “I got that. What did they do to the house?”
“Mom’s not sure. Since she’s not the owner all they would tell her is that there was damage and I’m suppose to contact them.”
Hell, I didn’t want to ask any more questions. His mood was definitely black now.
He began walking towards the venue again. I followed wondering what had happened to the house. When we got inside he pulled out his phone and I listened to him talk to the Belleville police. He was polite but I could tell very angry. He explained that he was unable to return. Obviously there was a problem with that answer.
I pulled on his arm slightly, “I can go.” I said softly.
“Could you please hold for a minute?” he said into the phone.
He glared at me, “What?”
“I’m you wife. We own that house now. Let me fly back and handle it. I’ll meet you at the next venue.”
I could tell this wasn’t what he wanted. He closed is eyes and spoke into the phone. He explained that his wife would be there in the morning. “This is fucking stupid. I don’t see why we have to deal with this.”
“It’s okay. I’ll take care of it.” I said trying to sooth him.
“But I don’t want you to leave.”
I put my arms around his neck and hugged him. “Well I don’t want to leave either but I’ll be back as quick as I can.”
He hugged me tightly, “Make sure it’s as quick as you can.” He whispered, “I need you with me.”
His tone frightened me. I knew I had to take care of the problem back in Jersey quickly.