Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Living in Panic

Don't Be So Scared

by RyanRossLuver 1 review

The aftermath of a long hard day

Category: Panic! At The Disco - Rating: R - Genres: Drama,Humor,Romance - Warnings: [!!] [?] - Published: 2008-01-11 - Updated: 2008-01-12 - 1359 words - Complete

Don't be so scared, we will not lead you on.
- The Academy Is...

By the time we arrived back at the hotel, it was coming up to 11:30, and we still hadn’t done our interview. As soon as we entered the lounge area, we started the interview before we could sit down – the TV crew already had the cameras set up and recording.
“Now, people, you all know that we are using the footage from tonight’s concert for the new Panic! At the Disco DVD. Our first question, directed towards Em more than anyone else is, what happened on stage tonight during ‘Lying Is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have without Taking Her Clothes Off’?” asked the female reporter.
“Well, to be honest, I don’t really know myself. I suppose I just felt like changing the choreography, and Ryan was just there. And, to be truly honest, I have kind of wanted to kiss Ryan since I first met him.” By that point, I was blushing crimson.
“Will there be any more of this happening, both in show and out?” the male reporter asked Ryan.
“I wouldn’t know. It depends on whether the band is okay with it, how much it will affect the shows and how much it will affect our social lives and recording time.” He said it with so much confidence, it surprised me. But he is almost four years older than me, so come to think of it I’m actually not all that surprised.
“Now, this question is for everyone to answer: what is the strangest thing a fan has ever said to you?”
“Well, a girl asked me for directions to the nearest hotel, not even realizing who I was, until her boyfriend said to her whether she knew who I was or not.” I replied.
“For me I think it had to be this time when a girl followed me down the line of autograph hunters, and at the end she whispered in my ear that she wanted to have sex with me and have the rest of the band watching.” Brendon answered.
“Got to be that time this little girl, no older than 8, came up to us after we sung “Lying Is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have without Taking Her Clothes Off” live on Leno and said that she fucking loved me. I just cannot believe that young kids that age listen to our music, and use that kind of language when talking to older people.” Replied Jon.
“After an interview on TV, we had to set up and get into position to play after the break, and I couldn’t find my drum sticks. I was hunting everywhere for them, and eventually found them in the hands of someone I knew……, my grandmother. She came up to me, pinched my cheek and said how proud she was of little Spency-Boy. I was so embarrassed. Everyone around us were listening in, I was feeling so out of place.” Spencer explained.
“A group of girls ran up to me once just after I got off stage back in July, the 12th to be exact, and they all screamed at me in unison, ‘Marry Us Ryan Ross, We’ll be the Best Things that ever happened to Panic! At the Disco.’” Ryan admitted. I remembered that occasion – it was my first official show as part of Panic! At the Disco. I walked over to the spare seat next to the female reporter, and sat down. I leant my head back against the headrest, and closed my eyes for a second.

“…..Wake up Em.” I could feel someone shaking me. “Come on baby girl, wake up for us.” There’s only one person who calls me baby girl, and that was Jon. Why is Jon trying to wake me, I thought. Hang on, I’m not even asleep. And, with another shake, I was brought back into the hotel room where the interview was taking place, except all of the cameras, interviewers, camera operators and Spencer and Brendon had left.

“W...What happened?” I asked, dazed by the sudden lack of people around me. Ryan and Jon were really close to me. I felt like they were suffocating me. I was having trouble breathing. It really didn’t help that I was asthmatic, and I have a history of having panic attacks related to stress. But what am I stressed about? Ryan took note of my brewing panic attack, and grabbed my inhaler. He lifted me off the seat, sat down in my place, and sat me back on his lap. He helped me use my inhaler, and started rubbing my back in a reassuring way, telling me to breathe deeply and slowly. After a few minutes, I relaxed a little.
“You fell asleep during the interviews, and we thought that you needed it, so we left you alone. All of a sudden, you started screaming and crying out, so we decided to re-schedule the rest of the interview for next week. The interviewers packed everything up in quite a hurry, and Brendon and Spencer went to see them out. Once they were gone, Ryan and I decided that we would wake you up. The other two came in about five minutes ago, and went straight to bed because they’re really tired.” Jon looked exhausted after telling me this.

“Jon, why don’t you go off to bed? I’m fine now; I’ll just go off to my room, and try to get more sleep before we leave for New York. If I need anything, I’ll ask Dylan or Zack.” Dylan and Zack are my two security guards. They were great at their job, and it was like they didn’t need any sleep – they were always alert and willing to do anything for me, and hardly ever slept when given the chance.
“Okay, but, are you sure you don’t want me or Ryan to stay with you tonight?”
“Yes, I’m sure. It’s already gone midnight, and we have to get up at 6, so that leaves less than 5 hours of sleep, and I want you two to get as much as possible. I don’t think I’ll be able to get back to sleep, what with it being the anniversary of that occasion again.” Tears started to brim at the corners of my eyes.
“Okay, well, I’ll head off to bed now. I’ll let Ryan sort you out.” Unfortunately, Jon was oblivious to what the day was, but he still counts it as the 11th, as he hasn’t been to sleep yet. He headed off into his room, and closed the door behind him.

“We’d better get you to your room, okay? You should try to get some sleep,” I gave Ryan a look that showed I wouldn’t even try to sleep. “You don’t have to sleep. You could read, listen to music, work out some new and interesting choreography for tomorrow, okay? Just stay in your room until you need to get up in the morning.” I was crying by this point. I buried my head into Ryan’s chest, and sobbed quietly for a few minutes.
“Please, please don’t leave me alone, not today or tonight. It’s just too hard not to think about it.” My voice was quavering as I said this. On that note, Ryan stood up, took me by the hand and led me into my bedroom.
“No Ryan, I don’t want to do this.” He just shushed me. He made me sit on the bed, and he lay down next to me, pulling my head onto his chest.
“Let’s just try to get some sleep. If you need anything at all before we need to get up, just wake me okay? Don’t be worried about me if I don’t get much sleep – I’m not a good sleeper anyway.” I nodded my head, and pulled the duvet over us, and closed my eyes, falling asleep to the sound of Ryan’s breathing.
Sign up to rate and review this story