FicWad

I woke up on the couch, notepad on my stomach. Or at least, that’s where I left my notepad. When I jumped up with the jolt of Hemmy landing directly on my face after another one of his daredevil leaps off of the kitchen counter, I instantly noticed that I was not alone. Travis was laughing hard, slapping his knee, stood behind the kitchen counter with a slice of toast in his spare hand. Patrick was stood at the end of the couch holding my papers, flicking through them. I reached out for them but Patrick shook his head, finishing reading them, he put them in his back pocket.

‘I’m going to work’ Patrick fixed his hat, and signalled for Travis to follow him

‘I…’ Before I had anything else to say, he was gone, door slammed to punctuate the final full-stop of his sentence.

I was left confused. I didn’t write anything bad. Nothing I remember writing anyway. I wrote that I was sad. Why was Patrick acting like that? It was like a serious case of P.M.S. Pissy Man Syndrome not Patrick Martin Stumph. Although, it seems today that both are one and the same. Okay, so maybe he did have to go to work. Don’t see why he ran off like that though. Must have been something I’d done. There wasn’t anything that I’d really done.. I told him I loved him. Did that piss him off? Oh god, did I scare him away? Oh god.

I flicked open my cell phone to the message page but all I managed to type was the words ‘Oh My God’ twenty times. Before I’d gotten a chance to delete it all and actually write something serious my cell vibrated in my hand. Gerard was calling me. I had a bad feeling that I’d have to break my car out again. I accepted.

‘Yo’ I answered, bored

‘Heeeeeeeey Pete, my best friend in the world’ Gerard chimed cheerfully

‘Where to today?’ I retorted, sighing

‘Why do you assume I’m going to ask you to take me somewhere?’ Gerard sounded mock offended

‘Because the only time you’ve called me… ever’ I replied, already in search of car keys and shoes ‘Was to get me to drive you around’

‘True.. But that doesn’t mean that’s the only time I will ever call’ Gerard carried on his little act

‘Fine… If you don’t need me to take you anywhere…’ I trailed off

‘Okay, okay, you caught me’ He cut across quickly, I smiled to myself

‘Thought so…’ I nodded, dressing as I tried balancing the phone on my shoulder, ‘Where are we going?’

‘The hospital’ Gerard said plainly

‘You have an appointment?’ I asked, hoping around as I pulled some clean pants on, I could hear the smile in Gerard’s voice

‘No’ He answered

‘Oooooh’ I cooed

‘Shut up’ He shot back, ‘I told her I’d come see her today so we could talk some more’

‘That’s what you whispered to her yesterday?’ I snorted

‘Yeah,’ He mumbled, confused ‘Why?’

‘I thought you said something all suave and romantic’ I hooted, shaking my head, ‘All you said was: Hey, let’s hang out?’

‘Again.. Shut up’ Gerard growled, ‘Look, she’s not like any girl. She not like any other girl. She’s married. It’s complicated. I know she still doesn’t want to leave him. I’m not going to just throw huge decisions on her. I’m going to hang out with her. Get to know her better’

‘Fair enough I guess’ I agreed, damning him for stumping me

‘So, anytime soon’ He spoke lightly while I checked my watch

‘It’s twenty passed ten…’ I raised an eyebrow, ‘She’s just got in to work’

‘Exactly..’ Gerard chirped, ‘I’m going to take her out for breakfast’

‘Won’t she be… working?’ I asked, sceptical as to whether Gerard had actually thought any of this through

‘Her first break is at eleven until half passed’ Gerard replied, smugly ‘I checked while I was in’

‘Jesus,’ I guess he had thought this through, ‘So, when do you want me to get you?’

‘As soon as possible’ Gerard inhaled, ‘You can come for breakfast with us if you want… I’m thinking of asking her to come for dinner tonight… Oh but you can’t come with us then’

‘I figured that one, genius’ I laughed, ‘Breakfast sounds awesome.. I’ll just walk Hemmy and I’ll be over’

‘Thank you, thank you, thank you’ Gerard repeated

‘No problem,’ It felt good to be appreciated, ‘See you soon’

‘Later’ Gerard ended, hanging up

Well, perhaps this would take my mind off of Patrick. I should call him. My heart was telling me to call him. What would I say? ‘Sorry that I said that I love you?’ Yeah, right. I might have meant it. Well, I think I might have meant it. Still pretty lost on the whole love front. I suppose I’d have to base love on what Frank told me. It’s obvious him and Taylor are in love. He knows better than I do.

1. Love is being happy with someone.

Usually Patrick makes me happy. Right now, I admit I’m a little down. That’s because I don’t see him as much though. Apart from that I guess he makes me happy. So, check on that one.

2. It’s seeing yourself being with them forever.

That one gets me a little. It’s not that I can’t see myself being with him in the foreseeable future and it’s not that I can see myself with anyone else but I don’t like thinking about my future. My elder years. That kind of gets me down. My future is pretty bleak. Like I’d said before. I see kids and a wife. A wife. Guess that’s changed now. Still see kids though. So, half check I guess.


3. It’s someone being your favourite hello and your hardest goodbye.

My hardest goodbye. Definitely my hardest goodbye. I hated seeing him go this morning. Hell, I always hate seeing him leave, but this morning, one of the worst yet. Not even a real goodbye. Just a rushed farewell and off he went. Not even waiting for me to answer. Yeah, he was my hardest goodbye and I just wished I could see him again. So, he could be my favourite hello. Check for that.

4. It’s someone who can finally love you more than you love yourself.

As if I actually love myself at all right now. I didn’t know if Patrick loved me. Though, he probably loved me more than I did. His exit this morning didn’t really have me convinced though. I guess that would be a big x on that one.

So, two and a half out of four. Just over half. I suppose that the list for being in love rather than loving someone. Maybe I wasn’t in love but I did love him didn’t I? Didn’t I?