Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > I Don't Love You
We made it to the big city hotel; luxury compared to our earlier days and everyone got settled into their rooms. I’d barely opened the door when I was accosted by dearest Mikey, who had somehow gotten to my room before me. I knew what was coming and there was no way to avoid it.
“Why’d he kiss you?”
Ugh, I hated being interrogated by Mikey; the kid knew too much, he was always so damn perceptive. And I was trapped in a hotel room with him. I always went to Frank when Mikey was being like this, though I knew I couldn’t face him now.
“For the last time, Mikey,” I exclaimed, irritated beyond belief, “I don’t bloody know, I don’t know why he kissed me; I don’t know why he walked away, and I certainly don’t know why he’s offended!”
He pulled a wry face, concerned, “You’re hurt.”
“Huh?” I was confused now.
“You’re hurt by the fact he kissed you and ran away.” Explaining now, I felt like a five year old. “He’s gone out, for a walk to sort out his head, I guess.”
I scowled, “Well it’s not my fucking fault now, is it? HE kissed ME. Not the other way round, if anyone should be offended it’s me!”
“Well I’m just trying to help; I’ve seen the way you look at h–”
“I do not!”
“–im. You are so hopelessly… dependent on him. You need him. And I also know he needs you.”
“Ugh, I’m leaving.” Storming out of the hotel room, fighting tears the whole way down to the lobby, all I could think was how much I didn’t need to hear that he needs /me/. I could barely look after myself... how the fuck was I supposed to look after someone like Frank?
I made it to the lobby in a haze, managing not to succumb to the urge to just collapse to the floor in a sobbing mess, almost proud of that fact in some strange, twisted way. With the intention of coffee and a cigarette to settle my nerves I walked to the hotel’s restaurant, but upon seeing Ray and Bob there, I turned on my heel and all but ran into the street. I knew I was gonna get blasted for this, I didn’t even know which city we were in, as per usual. I just didn’t feel like seeing anyone I knew. Then again, I couldn’t exactly avoid any fans, who probably knew me better than I knew myself…at the moment anyway.
I wandered along the street, still fighting the strange sort of grief clawing its way over me. Finally, a Starbucks, salvation from my sleep deprived and therefore irrational mind, I almost, [almost] grinned in relief. Shoving open the heavy, glass door, I stumbled into the warm, coffee stained air of the building.
Ohfuck.
There he was. ShitShitShit. And for some reason only known to God he was waving me over. Or maybe that reason was only known to Mikey. I should’ve known the kid was gonna call Frank straight after I stormed out. Showed how predictable I was… walk from the hotel in any direction and find the nearest Starbucks… that’s where Gerard will be. Bloodyshitfuckbugger. Damn that brother of mine…
Ignoring Frank’s increasingly exaggerated gestures to join him, I walked up to the counter, trying to keep my long black hair in my face to prevent unwanted squeals of recognition. Waiting in line, I amused myself… no that was a lie… distracted myself with thoughts of how I would kill Mikey. Not that I ever would and though it was damn tempting when he pulled stunts like this, he was my kid brother and I loved him.
I made it to the front of the line and ordered my drink. After a moment of indecision, I got the look of recognition from the girl who was serving me which meant it was time to leave. A quick look over to Frank revealed he was still looking at me hopefully, his coffee all but ignored on the table. Sighing resignedly I made my way over to him, not even sure if I was still going to sit with him.
Now or never…
“Why’d he kiss you?”
Ugh, I hated being interrogated by Mikey; the kid knew too much, he was always so damn perceptive. And I was trapped in a hotel room with him. I always went to Frank when Mikey was being like this, though I knew I couldn’t face him now.
“For the last time, Mikey,” I exclaimed, irritated beyond belief, “I don’t bloody know, I don’t know why he kissed me; I don’t know why he walked away, and I certainly don’t know why he’s offended!”
He pulled a wry face, concerned, “You’re hurt.”
“Huh?” I was confused now.
“You’re hurt by the fact he kissed you and ran away.” Explaining now, I felt like a five year old. “He’s gone out, for a walk to sort out his head, I guess.”
I scowled, “Well it’s not my fucking fault now, is it? HE kissed ME. Not the other way round, if anyone should be offended it’s me!”
“Well I’m just trying to help; I’ve seen the way you look at h–”
“I do not!”
“–im. You are so hopelessly… dependent on him. You need him. And I also know he needs you.”
“Ugh, I’m leaving.” Storming out of the hotel room, fighting tears the whole way down to the lobby, all I could think was how much I didn’t need to hear that he needs /me/. I could barely look after myself... how the fuck was I supposed to look after someone like Frank?
I made it to the lobby in a haze, managing not to succumb to the urge to just collapse to the floor in a sobbing mess, almost proud of that fact in some strange, twisted way. With the intention of coffee and a cigarette to settle my nerves I walked to the hotel’s restaurant, but upon seeing Ray and Bob there, I turned on my heel and all but ran into the street. I knew I was gonna get blasted for this, I didn’t even know which city we were in, as per usual. I just didn’t feel like seeing anyone I knew. Then again, I couldn’t exactly avoid any fans, who probably knew me better than I knew myself…at the moment anyway.
I wandered along the street, still fighting the strange sort of grief clawing its way over me. Finally, a Starbucks, salvation from my sleep deprived and therefore irrational mind, I almost, [almost] grinned in relief. Shoving open the heavy, glass door, I stumbled into the warm, coffee stained air of the building.
Ohfuck.
There he was. ShitShitShit. And for some reason only known to God he was waving me over. Or maybe that reason was only known to Mikey. I should’ve known the kid was gonna call Frank straight after I stormed out. Showed how predictable I was… walk from the hotel in any direction and find the nearest Starbucks… that’s where Gerard will be. Bloodyshitfuckbugger. Damn that brother of mine…
Ignoring Frank’s increasingly exaggerated gestures to join him, I walked up to the counter, trying to keep my long black hair in my face to prevent unwanted squeals of recognition. Waiting in line, I amused myself… no that was a lie… distracted myself with thoughts of how I would kill Mikey. Not that I ever would and though it was damn tempting when he pulled stunts like this, he was my kid brother and I loved him.
I made it to the front of the line and ordered my drink. After a moment of indecision, I got the look of recognition from the girl who was serving me which meant it was time to leave. A quick look over to Frank revealed he was still looking at me hopefully, his coffee all but ignored on the table. Sighing resignedly I made my way over to him, not even sure if I was still going to sit with him.
Now or never…
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