FicWad

I watched him walk away and decided not to follow or argue. He had had a difficult night, whatever was eating at him, obviously bothered him a great deal. I sat there on the bench for a minute, just thinking. Man, this night was confusing. Gerard was acting like a puzzle. I hate puzzles; they're annoying because I suck at figuring them out. Especially crossword puzzles. Goddamn, they irked the hell out of me. Not that I was mentally inept or anything, I just really feel stupid when it comes down to solving the damn things. Trying to shake the thoughts of the night off, I walked back to the rest of the guys. Maybe I could get my mind off of things for now.
I took my seat at the table once more and started talking to Ray.

"Is he okay? Did he blow up at you?"

"No, he's just exhausted, he went up to bed."

"Oh, okay. Makes sense. I guess the tour is taking a real toll on him. He only acts this way when we have--"

"When you have what?"

“Never mind. Sorry. I shouldn't have said anything."

"No, tell me. It's okay. It's not like Gerard is going to know."

"He always acts like this when..." he paused to lower his voice.

"When we have a new girl on tour with us."

"Oh."

"None of us can figure out why. He started acting this way after I broke up with my last girlfriend."

"That's odd."

"Yeah, I know but no one ever tries to ask because he seems ultra sensitive about it."

"Hmm." I was stumped. Although I knew I'd figure it out eventually, I was still clueless. It bugged me but I tried to ignore it for the time being. I played a few games of poker with them and at about an hour later everyone decided to go get some sleep. I said all my good-nights and left the boys at the table. The halls were still quiet but I actually laughed when I heard some random loud snoring. I arrived at my room and opened the door. Putting my coat away into the closet the bedside lamp turned on. It nearly scared me half to death. It was
pitch black when I had entered the room. Scared, I walked further into the bedroom. It was Gerard. He was looking so serious and solemn. Gerard was blankly staring, at what I didn't know.

"Sorry if I startled you. I couldn't sleep."

"It's fine."

"It was too late to get another room tonight. If it bothers you, I'll get a new one tomorrow."

"Oh, okay. Well, I don't mind you staying here tonight."

"Thanks. I can sleep on the couch if you want."

"No need. I will. You got here first."

"No, you need to be in a bed."

"And why is that?" I gave him a quizzical look.

"You need to rest, you'll have a long day tomorrow and the couch isn't all that comfortable."

"If it's not comfortable, then why should you sleep there?"

"Okay, this is foolish. Let's stop arguing. I got us into this anyway."

I wanted to change the subject and settle all this later so I crossed over to the phone and thumbed through the phone book.

"What're you doing?" he asked.

"Hiring hookers, now hush." I dialed the phone number to the local pizza joint.
"What?" he sounded as if he nearly choked on air.

"I'm just kidding. I'm ordering pizza. Don't get your panties in a bunch." I waited patiently for someone to end the dial tone.

"Panties in a bunch? You have some weird sayings, woman." He laid back up against the bedpost.

"Shh.", I urged. When someone answered I ordered what I had wanted and turned to Gerard.

"What do you want?"

"You."

"Sorry, they can't put that on a pizza. Now, seriously what kind?"
Gerard remained silent as ever.

"Fine then, be difficult." Swiftly he rose and came to my side of the bed. Snatching the phone and putting it back on the receiver, he sat beside me.

"Well, that was all kinds of rude."
"Shut up."

"Excuse--" His lips cut me off before I could speak again. Gerard pulled back and smiled.
"Me.", I finished, out of breath.

“We could just share the bed, you know.” His eyes were traveling up and down my body.
“I don’t know if that’s such a good idea.” It sounded good but he was still being so puzzle like and I didn't want to start anything I’d regret in the morning.

“I wouldn't try anything, promise.” Gee tried to give me his most innocent face.

“Yeah, uh huh.”, I laughed at the face he had on.

“Okay, so I’m lying.”

“Look, I’m going to take a shower. You’re going to stay in here. I’ll decide where I’m sleeping when I’m done.”

He spoke through a sigh, “As you wish.”

A few minutes later I walked back into the room to find him in the same place as before, laying down. I had thought about it in the shower and sharing the bed didn't seem so bad. Gerard knew I would fight if he tried anything.Yet at the same time I kind of wanted him to do something.My feelings for him had seemed to resurface time a million for the moment. With all the confusion he was causing me, I thought it best not to encourage him. I was going to try to be good.

"Decide yet, sugar?" He gave me a smirk.

"We can share. Try anything and you're on the couch."

"Sounds fair." He sounded disappointed.

Damn you Gerard. Damn these feelings I have for you. You make it so hard, I thought to myself. I wanted to protest him but give in all at the same time. Why the hell did this have to be so complicated?! I sat beside him on the mattress.

"Something's bothering you. Tell me."

"No, it's not important."

"Liar. Now, fess up."

"You first. Why are you acting like this?"

"Like what? I'm only expressing the fact that I like what I see. Its fun to mess with that pretty little head of yours."

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"You can only keep an animal in a cage sane for so long. When they're let out, they tend to go mad, Christine."