(#) favoritexloser 2008-03-07its nice and your plot is great.
but what kinda annoys me is your storyline and dialogue.
I agree, it was indeed all of a sudden that my chem asked the girls to come along.
but there should've been some contradictions or drama at least.
your dialogue seems too predictable and kind of dull.
but overall, great plot. it got my attention, which usually doesn't happen all the time. :)
Sign up to review this story.