FicWad

Oddly, maybe unsurprisingly, Patrick wasn’t home by nine. In fact, he wasn’t home at all. I gave up being concerned at about five in the morning I think. Maybe. The hours kind of bleed together after midnight. I heard a clattering outside the bedroom door at six. Patrick was home, eventually. I would have been more pissed off, I think, if I didn’t need him so badly. All of Tuesday went by at snail pace. I swear, there is only a select number of times you can flick on the TV to be faced by another infomercial before you go insane. How the hell had I let myself get like this again? I hate to ever make a comparison between Patrick and Ash. Hopefully, this would be the first and last I’d ever ever have to use. When I was still with Ash, she could be away for days on end. I could completely hate her guts but the second she left me for more than 24 hours I was usually practically begging her to come back. I couldn’t be alone. Not for even a day.

Patrick trickled in early in the morning, slipping through as quite as he possibly could. Not quietly enough apparently.

‘Trick..?’ I mumbled to the darkness, seeing his vague outline at the foot of the bed

‘Scoot..’ He pushed against me gently, rolling me back over to my side of the bed.

Okay, don’t judge me on this but, when Patrick’s not there I sleep on his pillow. That sounds a bit disturbing but it helps me sleep. I think it’s because his smell is on it. He smells a little like a mixture of sweat and strawberries and cookie dough. Sweet, pure and innocent. The smell of youth. Bizarre.

‘Mkay..’ I practically melted against him as he worked his way under the covers, ‘Miss you’
‘Miss me?’ He laughed, vibrating in his chest, ‘What, now?’

‘Mmmmhmmm’ I rubbed my eyes, sighed and dropped back, facing away from him, ‘I miss you’

‘Well,’ Patrick ruffled my hair, ‘I’m here now, so, don’t..’

Waking next to Patrick is far from unpleasant. What is unpleasant however, is waking next to a note left by Patrick. When you awake, a little disorientated, you reach out to the pillow next to you to feel nothing but paper. Paper can not hug you. It can’t comfort you. All it can do is inform you.

‘Petey, Working Today, As You Know. You Were Sleeping When I Left. Didn’t Want To Disturb. See You Tonight. And It’s True You Know. I Do Miss You. Patrick x’

‘Sure’ I huff out loud, secretly a little touched

I grabbed the note and put it on my bedside table. Spending most of my morning just staring at it. How pathetic is that? I’ve been with Patrick for, what, a month maybe, if that. I sigh. Maybe this isn’t going to work? I hate to say it or even to consider.. I’m probably being melodramatic. It’s kinda what I do. I feel a little forgettable lately. I’m sure he’s not purposely staying out late just so he doesn’t have to come home. I’m sure he is actually busy. I don’t blame him for not realising I need him. Travis needs him more, maybe. Maybe he’s helping him with his band. Maybe he’s making connections, making it easier for our band in the long term. I’m not angry or aggravated that he has a job. Hell, I should probably get one too. These long days at home are driving me nuts. I haven’t been unemployed since I was ten. I’d always had my paper round, working in the candy shop, small work in several offices, a garage once back at the start of college. Guess I’m just not used to the lifestyle change.

As much as I love Gerard, in a purely platonic way, of course. I wasn’t exactly ecstatic on receiving his call this morning. I did tell him that he could call anytime but I generally meant it as a polite passing comment really. Since Gerard is such a reasonable guy I expected him to treat this royalty well, as in not calling before nine A.M or after midnight. Granted it was only about half ten I’m sure I can forgive him this time. Secretly, I was glad to have someone to talk to. I wouldn’t tell him though. Gerard would be so smug.

‘Morning?’ I mumbled, trying to dodge my way around Hemmy who was, as usual, bugging me to make him breakfast

‘Hi’ Gerard, excited Gerard.

‘Hi…?’ I wasn’t used to hearing this tone from Gerard, he must be sick

‘OkaysoIneedyoutolookafterMikeytonight’ A slur of words all correlated into one messy yelp

‘Pardon?’ I was close to just saying ‘HUH!?’

‘Okay,’ He took a deep breath, I reached for the cereal, ‘I need you to babysit…’

‘Hang out with..’ I corrected, filling my bowl and hunting for milk

‘Babysit’ Gerard stated plainly, I rolled my eyes

‘He hates when you call it that, you know’ I answer, fetching a spoon and putting two waffles in the toaster

‘I know’ I could hear his grin

‘Right, continue,’ I took this opportunity to stuff my mouth with a spoonful of Lucky Charms

‘Sooooo,’ He chuckled, I heard stirring in the background, ‘I need you to babysit…’

‘HANGOUTWITH!’ A yelp from somewhere behind Gerard, from who I can only assume to be Mikey

‘Hey Mikey’ I laugh, tending to my now popped waffles

‘Your babysitter says hi’ Gerard snorted, I shake my head, ‘Okay, ouch..’

‘Mikey, play nice!’ I smirk, offloading my waffles into Hemingway’s bowl

‘I’ve managed to subdue him,’ Gerard hollered, Mikey was squealing, ‘So, any chance you can come babysit today?’

‘Sure I guess,’ I smiled, looking forward to spending time with a human for a change, no offence Hemmy, ‘I’d love to HANG OUT with Mikey today’

‘Cool,’ Mikey chirped, making me giggle

‘So, yeah’ Gerard finished, ‘Come by at like, twelve?’

‘Twelve?’ I question, wondering why so early

‘Yeah, I’m meeting Becca for lunch’ I almost awed out loud, ‘Then we might go see a movie later’

‘Well, have fun you crazy kids’ I smile, ‘I’ll be round at eleven, just cause…’

I almost added, I’m lonely. Almost.

‘See ya there’ They both replied in their impeccable Way timing

‘Later’ I hoot, feeling my stomach do what I can only assume to be a happy dance.

Either that or I have indigestion.