FicWad

“I knew you’d be back.” The scruffy male extinguished his cigarette against the cold concrete floor before fully turning to face the shorter man. The smaller man’s forehead barely reached the taller’s pierced nose.
“Yeah, Look, Brock, I haven’t got much time, The guys don’t know I’ve gone, They’ve probably set out a search party or something by now…” Said Frank, peering around nervously.
“Ok, dude, same as last time??”
Frank nodded eagerly, his hand outstretched to receive the goods, some cash in the other hand for payment. Once the transaction had been hurriedly made between the two men the taller one turned to leave.
Frank knew that the guys in the band, especially Gerard, would hate what he was doing, but he didn’t care. Actually, that was part of the reason he did it in the first place. He was sick of being the worthless one at the side, the un-important one, the one that couldn’t make his own decisions. His life had little meaning left anyway, without music he was nothing. The only thing stopping him from going right off the edge of meaning was Gerard.
Gerard.
It would hurt him a lot to know what Frankie was doing, but it was too late now, it was beyond his power to do anything, even Frankie couldn’t control himself anymore.
Before the taller man slinked off, Frank suddenly remembered-
“Hey! Brock!”
The Man looked at Frank in question.
“About last time, I forgot to pay you.” He held out a handful of notes. Brock laughed.
“Don’t worry about that! That was a present.” Frank looked at Brock questioningly, before in a flash of sudden movement, Brock pulled Frank into a kiss, “because I like you, little dude.” He finished and walked away.
Frank knew better than to try to fight the man, after all, Brock was about double his strength and Frank was weak. Also, without Brock, Frank couldn’t get what he needed so badly.
The kiss had only been short, Frank made sure of that. He hated every millisecond of it, the rough way he had handled Frank’s frail body, the bitter aftertaste it had left on Frank’s lips, the way he had done his action, regardless of how Frank felt about it.
Everything about those moments heavily contrasted with how Gerard treated Frank carefully and softly, taking his feelings into account before doing anything.
Gerard.
Frank shuddered at the thought of his lover’s crushed expression if he ever found out about what Frank had slipped into. At the thought of Gerard, he decided to go back to the tour bus.

---
“Dude, that’s like your… 9th beer today??”
”Well…. Yeah…”
“Frank, Babe, Maybe you should chill out a bit on the beer, eh??”
He had been like this every day that week, getting drunk out of his mind, doing stupid things and randomly challenging people to fights. Good thing the Fall Out Boy guys knew how to take a joke whilst being chased by a crazed drunken man with a wheelchair…
Frank sighed and drained the remainder of his beer. He got up and swayed slightly, Gerard held him close to steady him.
“Babe, Where are you going?”
“Outsshhide for a shhmoke, Gerry Hunny.” Frank slurred, plastering his lips onto Gerard’s, almost smothering him. Frank rarely showed any affection for Gerard during the scarce moments of the day he was sober, he had been smoking increasing amounts of cigarettes a day and he had been mysteriously disappearing at odd moments and coming back acting all weird towards everyone. Gerard had tried to talk to Frank like they used to, but it always ended up in upset and Frank saying stuff he didn’t mean… Well, Gerard hoped he didn’t mean.
Frank stumbled into the Bunk area and remerged some minutes later with a recognizable goofy smile on his face. He clambered out of the bus and down towards a bushed area to the side. Gerard followed.
“Frankie, You okay, babe??”
“Just leave me alone.” He replied sternly, shooting a look at Gerard before continuing to try and work his lighter, he cursed each time it wouldn’t light. Gerard couldn’t help but notice Frank’s eyes, his pupils were wide and his eyes seemed vacant.
It must just be his eyes getting used to the outdoors…
At that moment Frank bent over and began to puke on the floor. Gerard was hurting inside to see Frankie in trouble, he just stood there looking helpless. Jack took this as his cue to come over and help out, he strode over to where Frank was hunched over and began to rub his back.
“Gerard, dude. Frank’s way out of it… Maybe it’s best if-”
“Did he asssk for y-your opinionnn??” Frank exploded, his eyes shining in rage.
“W-well, n-no but…” Jack stuttered, he had only been trying to help, he didn’t know what was up with this Frank dude. He had been like this since Jack had first met him.
“Thhhenn jussst leave it okk?”
Frank pushed away from Jack and made his meandering advance back to the bus. When he got inside, the rest of the band began interrogating him. God… WHY wouldn’t they just leave him alone?? They always thought they knew best, controlling him. They were all against him, even Gerard. They were all plotting against him just to get rid of him, he knew it!
Mikey tried to grab Frank’s wrist to keep him seated with the rest of the band, but the result wasn’t pretty. Frank stomped to the bunk area of the bus, leaving Mikey to nurse his bleeding nose – a present from Frank. The band didn’t know what to do. It was as if they were losing a brother. Frank was part of them all, without him they all felt as though they were missing a crucial factor of their lives.
Tears streamed down Gerard’s face. Didn’t Frankie Love him anymore?? What had gone wrong?? It was all Gerard’s fault, he knew it. He decided to follow Frank into the bunk are to clear up the fact that he loved him, and that he didn’t mean to upset Frank.
Frank needed something to cheer him up, something he knew was back in his bunk. He bend down to sit in his bunk area, tearing down the picture Gerard had drawn him. He felt no remorse. Frank lifted up his pillow from the end of his bed and pulled out what he needed, the sudden rush of happiness it gave him was his reason to keep going.
He smiled to himself as he pulled out the bag of white powder. Everything was going to dissolve into one big happy memory, with no recollection of tonight’s happenings.
He bent down to sniff the heavenly substance into his system, when –
“F-Frankiie??”