FicWad

NEON GENESIS EVANGELION: ASCENT OF THE FALLEN

By Sparky Clarkson

Part Two:

"Nevertheless, I have somewhat against thee, for thou hast left thy first love..." (Revelation 2:4)

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"You don't have to come here, if you don't want to," Shinji said quietly. While his drug-induced sleep of the previous night had not been as beneficial as a normal rest might have been, he still felt somewhat better. After all, even drugged sleep was better than none.

Shinji stood outside the door to Asuka's room, with his hand on the door. Rei waited patiently next to him. She seemed uncomfortable somehow, though her face was just as impassive as ever. Perhaps it was a hint of nervous movement around her normally still frame a twitch of the fingers, a shuddering of the chest, or a trembling of the legs.

"I... should," she said, uncertainly.

"Are you sure?"

Rei gathered herself, standing straighter than before, and took a deep breath. The nervous aura dissipated, and she said in a stronger voice,

"Yes. I am certain."

Shinji nodded and opened the door, revealing the same antiseptic chamber he had visited the day before. The once-vivacious pilot lay on her back in the bed, her vacant eyes trained blankly on the ceiling.

He shivered, seeing the pilot of EVA-02 laying limply, passively on the bed. Asuka's frozen form made the room somehow seem colder than the rest of the hospital.

"So still..." Rei gasped quietly. Shocked to hear the emotion in her voice, Shinji whirled his head around in time to catch a glimpse of her expression. A great wave of pain and sorrow cascaded across Rei's face momentarily, but the tumult quickly subsided, her gaze returning to its impassive norm.

Shinji awkwardly reached out and squeezed Rei's hand, and attempted to say something that would comfort her. However, he couldn't find the words he needed. Eventually he gave up and stepped into the room.

Shinji pulled a chair up next to the bed, on Asuka's left. The sheets had been pulled back a bit, and she had on a new gown a red one.

Shinji found himself comparing it unfavorably to the color of her hair.

Rei walked to the foot of the bed and stood there. Shinji pointed out achair, but she said, "I... can't stay long. You are better for her than Iam." Shinji stared at Rei oddly for a moment, but quickly turned back to Asuka. He heard Rei whispering something, but forced himself to focus on the devastated girl despite his curiosity.

Gently, he reached out and took Asuka's hand, holding it as he might grasp abubble fearful of putting any pressure on it. He said nothing, but stared into Asuka's sightless eyes, hoping that they might be the route some sign of awareness used to escape the dark pit of her soul.

After about a minute, Shinji heard the door open and close again as Rei left. He was almost glad for the sound a kind of sign that things could change. But the noise disappeared quickly, dissipating into a thousand tiny echoes that died hopelessly in the small room. Shinji and Asuka were left alone, alone and still, much as they had been earlier.

This time, though, the quiet tableau seemed more wholesome, the calm stillness of sleep more than the frozen paralysis of death. But the children's peacefulness was only an illusion. When Shinji had taken Asuka's hand, her mind had been unsettled. Now, as he gently massaged it, gazing hopefully into her vacant eyes, total war had at last begun to consume the soul to which those bright blue eyes were the window.

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The warm, syrupy LCL surrounded Asuka's naked body, insinuating itself into every pore, every crevice, every orifice. The thick liquid clung to her thighs like the wanton caress of a rapist, and violated her mouth with its ash-like flavor. Asuka, spread-eagled, tried to cover herself in shame, but found that her arms and legs were immobile. Her neck was also frozen, forcing her to gaze in horror on the object she hated most in all the world.

A doll.

Kyoko's "Asuka" doll that she had "killed" before hanging herself floated in front of the red-haired Eva pilot. It had been a small thing in the world, a tiny rag stuffed with cotton lumps. But now it had bloated into an enormous, mountain-sized monstrosity. Its once- limp limbs were now animated, and its sewn-on smile had transformed into a face-wide, malicious grin.

This experience was familiar to Asuka. Though much of her time in the past few weeks since her synchronization ratio had dropped to zero had been a mental blank, there had been a few periods during which Asuka's mind was filled with hallucinations. This had been a frequent vision, thrust upon her several times without warning. Before, it had stayed for barely a moment. Now, however, the nightmare clung to its spot in her consciousness, bringing stillness to her mental milieu.

Stillness meant no reprieve from pain, though.

The doll began to speak, its voice a high, ear-shattering whine.

"I'm more important than you/," the doll gloated,"Mommy loves /me more."

Asuka recognized the sound it was a mockery of her own voice, as it sounded when she was at her most cruel. She tried to cover her ears to block out the auditory reminder of her sins, but her stony limbs would not comply.

Helplessness angered Asuka. "That's not true!" she screamed in reply to the doll's taunt. "You don't matter at all! You're nothing but astupid doll!"

"Stupid," the doll repeated, inflecting the word so that it hit Asuka like a harpoon. "You call so many things stupid..." it teased, and began a series of grotesque transformations. Its head shifted shape so that it looked like Rei's, and the doll said, "Stupid Rei is so much like adoll. She only does what others order her to."

Asuka said nothing, though she felt vaguely sick on hearing the apparition speak this way. The doll changed again. Now it bore Shinji's face, which had acaricatured expression of fear on it.

"Stupid Shinji is a weak little boy, running away from his problems," the doll sneered. "Such a pathetic waste, isn't he?"

"No..." Asuka growled through clenched teeth. She recognized the thought as hers, but no longer wished to accept her own words. However right they may have seemed when she said them, they sounded wrong coming from this monster.

The doll didn't stop. It continued with its litany, each time changing its face to caricature the person it was talking about. "Stupid Misato is aslut... stupid Touji and Kensuke are perverts and idiots... stupid Hikari doesn't understand your problems..." The doll reverted
to its original face. "Only little Asuka matters," it mocked."Tell me, /little girl/," it continued, "what isn't stupid?What won't you spite?"

Asuka sniffed and tried to raise her chin. "Eva isn't stupid," she replied.

"Aw," the doll pouted, "But little Asuka can't pilot the Eva anymore. She is useless. She refused to help other people with their pain, and ran away from her own. But she could not run away forever. Now she has become adoll, just like me. She does not move unless others move her, does not eat unless others feed her. She is a burden dead, useless weight."

"NO!" Asuka shouted, but in her heart, she knew the truth.

"It's better this way, though, isn't it?" the doll purred."Before you turned into a limp little doll, all you did was hurt other people. At least you won't cause the people who care about you any more pain..."

"I didn't..." Asuka protested, but her voice was feeble, and the words held no force. Already, her mind was filling with a thousand memories.

Every slight, every insult, every slap, and every sharp word she had said came flowing back into her consciousness. Every person she knew, and some she didn't, had been the victim of her assaults, verbal and physical. All were in her memories: Shinji, Misato, Rei, Touji, Ritsuko, her father... and her mother.

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As Shinji gently massaged her hand, Asuka began to shiver. Again, a single word escaped her throat.

"Mommy..."

Without any further warning, Asuka began flailing around on the bed.

Her writhing quickly pushed her sheets to the side, and sent Shinji tumbling to the floor as a knee and an elbow caught him in the chest and face.

Shinji felt no pain, however he barely even realized that he had been knocked down. In an instant, he was back on his feet, trying to subdue Asuka so she didn't hurt herself. He groped frantically for the panic button to call the nurses while he muttered anything he could think of to calm Asuka down.

Still, Asuka's eyes were vacant.

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At last the barrage of memories ceased. The doll laughed again, the sound was a twisted version of Asuka's own voice. "What apity," it gloated, "They all tried to care for you, and all you could give them in return was pain. How lucky they are that you can't hurt them anymore."

Asuka hung her head. What have I done? she asked herself. What kind of a monster have I been?

"Why cling to life?" the doll asked, grinning evilly. "All you did while you were alive was hurt people. Sure, for a while your ability to pilot Eva made up for your wretched, hurtful personality, but now you don't even have that anymore. Why live? Don't you want to die? That, at least, would make all the people you wounded happier."

"Yes... die..." Asuka murmured, her head still hung low. Tears filled her eyes as she realized what pain she had caused to the only people who might be considered her friends. "They'll be happier without me," she whispered.

Then she heard very faintly, as if from a great distance, a familiar boy's voice saying, "Please wake up, Asuka... I need you..."

He still... cares? Asuka wondered. Her head snapped up and she glared at the doll, the animated mockery of life that floated in front of her. If Idie, I can't make up for what I've done, she realized.

/That damn thing was trying to make me hurt them even more/! Her nostrils flared, and she felt something rising up within her, an emotion she had not felt in a long time rage.

The anger she had shown and felt in the past was nothing compared to this emotion. It was more than the overacted frustration she expressed when the Eva wouldn't work, more than the annoyance that made her yell at Shinji. Pure, white-hot rage burned in her chest, searing her heart. The heat spread into her frozen limbs, freeing them for action, then poured into her lungs and erupted from her mouth in a furious howl. "/You!/" she screamed at the doll, "You lie! You lied to my mother, and convinced her to kill herself! And now, you're lying to me!"

Asuka felt that something had changed. She looked down at herself and saw that somehow, her plugsuit had appeared on her. Now, protected from the doll's button-eyed gaze and the tainted caress of the LCL,

Asuka felt even stronger. "You told me to kill myself so I wouldn't have to face the harm I caused! But you knew I would hurt everyone even more!Do you think I am an idiot!" she screamed, realizing as she did so that another protective shell was forming around her: the entry plug. Nonetheless, she continued, "You can't fool me! You're a lie! An empty illusion! That's all you ever were! And it's all you ever /will be/!"

And suddenly, she felt around her the strength, the power, of EVA-02.

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Shigeru looked up from his console. "I just registered a small power surge in Unit Two. It's gone now," he said. Maya shrugged."Keep an eye on it," she replied. "And tell me if it happens again. But it was probably nothing."

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The doll began shrinking as the massive form of EVA-02 approached it.

Asuka withdrew her progressive knife and sliced through the doll's bloated body with a single blow. As the pieces drifted apart from each other, they revealed behind them the sight of a hospital room, and a face she had not thought she would ever see again.

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Asuka stopped her flailing and lay still on the bed for amoment.

Nervous and on the verge of tears out of concern for his fellow pilot, Shinji leaned over her to check for any injuries. Just as he was scanning Asuka's face, her eyes lost their vacancy and focused on him, lighting up in recognition. She convulsively lunged forward, knocking him back into the chair.

She followed his fall, leaning forward so that her head was resting on his shoulder, her arms thrown around his neck. "Shinji," she cried, tears running down her cheeks, "I'm sorry I called you stupid... I never meant it... please don't hate me!"

Shinji, startled and confused, spluttered for a few moments as he tried to reply. "I-I-I... I... I... d-don't h-hate you, A-Asuka. I... I... n-never did. I..." but whatever he had meant to say next was drowned out by the clanging of alarms throughout NERV headquarters.

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"Peripheral defense sensors detect nine targets. The Magi classify them as Evangelion units 05 through 13," Makoto announced, gnawing his lower lip as he studied his screens. The usual combat duty group, without Ristuko, had taken their places in Central Dogma. "Magi estimate 95 chance that target intentions are hostile."

"All nine," Kouzou muttered.

"As I expected, the old men have become so desperate that they will try anything," Gendo replied, a cold smile on his face. "In their desperation, they'll succeed unless we do something,"

Kouzou noted.

"Solving that problem is Major Katsuragi's duty," Gendo said."You will assist her in the task. I have something that I must attend to."

"What..?" Kouzou asked, shocked, but Gendo was already leaving the command center.

"You are in charge, Fuyutsuki," Gendo said as he left. When he reached the door, he turned around for a moment, and added, "You are authorized to use all available force all pilots and Evas are expendable. I'm sure your defense will be adequate." Kouzou shuddered at the sight of the cold, malicious smile Gendo was wearing. Before he could frame a reply, though, the Commander disappeared down the hallway.

Kouzou shook his head and turned back to the command center, where the staff had settled completely into their normal positions. What a strange thing is war, he thought, For the soldier, even the most deadly battle becomes business but a terrible business. 'All pilots and Evas are expendable,' Gendo says. But everyone here knows that there is only one Eva, one pilot. And so the soldier makes a businesslike decision to sentence his son to death. The aging professor shook his head once more. "Now is no time for introspection," he muttered, then shouted, "I want options! We must defend Headquarters at all costs!"

Misato turned around and shrugged. "I'm open to suggestions," she said, "We have one operational Evangelion that we have to use to face nine. Nine! And with S2 engines! And how the hell did they get a hold of that thing Rei used against the fifteenth?"

Kouzou sat down at the desk in the top level of the command center and dropped his head into his hands. He was no military genius, but he knew that against this kind of foe, NERV had only one working weapon.

/Damn you, Gendo, for making me do this/, he thought, then raised his head and stood again. "We have only one option," he announced,"Headquarters has suffered too much damage to defend against asiege."

Misato nodded glumly, and momentary silence fell across the bustling command center. The Major wiped her eyes, flicking away the small amount of moisture that had accumulated there. "Notify the pilot," she ordered,"Prepare to sortie EVA-01."

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"Shinji, I'm sorry... I hoped it was over, but..."

"Don't be, Misato," Shinji replied from inside his entry plug. The boy looked exhausted, both mentally and physically, but he managed a slight smile. "This isn't your fault."

/How can we sentence him to death like this? He doesn't stand a chance!/Misato thought. Tears filled her eyes, and she didn't bother to wipe them away."Shinji," she said, reaching out to touch the screen that showed her his face, "come... come back safe."

"I will, Misato... I won't fail you..."

Misato nodded, and rested her head in her hand, as if covering her eyes might end the nightmare she and all the people of NERV now faced.

She managed to choke back her sob, and croak, "Launch." He's doing this for me... she thought, When will he have a chance to do something for himself?

As she watched the monitors showing EVA-01's rise through the network of tunnels leading to the surface, she clenched her fist. /Soon/, she promised, I'll make sure he gets a chance for happiness. Even if it means that I have to fight these damned angels with my own bare hands.

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Gendo's quick, determined steps echoed from the shadow-draped walls ofthe cavernous basement room. He paused, and gazed into the darknessfor a moment, eventually calling, "Rei."

In response, the lights flickered on to show the girl, dressed in her school uniform and seated on the edge of the bare, uncomfortable mattress that served as her bed. Rei's blank expression did not waver as she replied,"Yes."

"It is time," Gendo said, and removed his white leather gloves. Even in the dim light of the basement chamber, anyone could have clearly seen the embryonic form of Adam, the first angel, implanted in the palm of the Commander's right hand.

Rei slowly, smoothly, stood up and answered, "Perhaps."

"All the required signs have been fulfilled," Gendo replied. The tiny form of Adam began to glow slightly. Gendo smiled coldly and continued,"See, even now he aches to greet his bride. The prophecy in the Dead Sea scrolls has come to its critical juncture our actions now will decide the fate of all who come after us."

A shadow of irritation impinged briefly on Rei's vacant expression, but vanished quickly. She shrugged and said, "If you believe so, we shall try."

"Follow me."

"I know the way..."

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The production-model Eva units had not bothered to use any complicated tactical formation--indeed, they hadn't even bothered to go airborne.

They outnumbered the sole purple giant facing them by such an absurd margin that strategy no longer mattered. The grey-white giants simply formed asingle-file front as they approached EVA-01 through the ruins of Tokyo-3.

Not all the units were exactly alike, however. EVA-05, which was walking in the middle of the line a few steps behind the others, carried the Longinus Lance. SEELE's secret recovery operation had brought the powerful weapon into the hands of their pseudo-mechanized soldiers.

EVA-01 faced the oncoming squadron of Eva's impassively from the middle of the shattered city. Shinji unconsciously growled as he surveyed the opposition. He desperately tried to think of something to do against them, but his exhausted, overwrought mind kept drawing blanks.

Misato's face appeared on a video window. "Shinji, pay attention to the one with the Lance. I don't really know what it is, but I remember Rei used it to kill the fifteenth angel, so it must be pretty powerful. Keep your eye on it."

Shinji nodded, and focused on EVA-05. The unit was swinging out to the left, behind the line of production Eva's.

"Be careful, Shinji," Kouzou warned, "He's trying to flank you. That weapon, The Lance Of Longinus, is the most dangerous thing on the battlefield. You must avoid getting hit with it at all costs."

Shinji nodded, but did not respond. He kept his eyes on EVA-05, but something about its movement seemed odd. At least, odd if it truly intended to flank him while the other eight performed a frontal assault. EVA-05 had swung out behind the line of Eva's, and had come up to the left of the rest of them. However, it had not moved any further left, nor any further forward than the rest of the line.

"Range one kilometer," Makoto announced over the combat radio band, and the Evas stopped. With the exception of EVA-05, they all drew their progressive knives. Shinji tensed into a crouch, willing his Eva to grasp its own knife even more tightly.

EVA-05 pulled back its arm, getting ready to hurl the spear.

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Gendo stood at the edge of the lake of LCL, staring up at the white giant still pinned to the cross. Lilith had been regenerating since the Longinus Spear was removed from her side, but while her torso had regrown, there was no sign of a waist or legs. "Incomplete," he muttered,"I expected full healing. The Scrolls say nothing about this, though, so Isuppose there's no contradiction." Turning to the girl who stood beside him, he commanded, "Rei, get ready. We will proceed."

The albino girl glared at him for a moment, then shrugged and began to strip. She carelessly tossed the school clothes she was wearing to the ground in an untidy heap. Once nude, she turned back to the Commander and said,"I am ready."

Gendo smiled, and muttered, "Excellent." He began walking into the lake of LCL, Rei only a few steps behind. Though wide, the lake was deceptively shallow only about thigh-deep on the Commander. After a few minutes of walking, he and the albino girl stood at the foot of the cross. "It will not be long now, Rei," Gendo said, "When 01 is destroyed, Yui will be free, and we will commence Third Impact together."

"How will we know?" Rei asked.

"SEELE has reacquired the Longinus Lance, or they would never attack," Gendo replied. "Contact between the Spear and Unit One's core will cause an explosion large enough to be felt even here. When the core is destroyed, Yui's soul will be freed something you will feel because you are partially made of her."

"Very well," Rei said, nodding. A moment later she asked,"Must Shinji die to allow Third Impact?"

Gendo shrugged, and replied, "There's no other way to free Yui. We must have our priorities, after all..."

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Shinji crouched, trying to anticipate when and how EVA-05 would finally throw the Longinus Lance at him. The production Eva's, silent and still, regarded him coldly with their glowing eyes. The ten units held the tableau for almost a minute.

Then, EVA-05 wheeled and threw the Longinus Lance down the line of production model Eva's. The aim was perfect it tore through the center of each Eva, destroying all eight S2 organs and cores. Shinji barely had enough time to develop a full AT field before the Evas exploded in a massive firestorm.

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Terminal Dogma shuddered, sending a massive oscillation through the lake of LCL. "At last," Gendo said, struggling to keep his balance.

"Finally we can be reunited, Yui."

Only a moment later, however, he felt a searing pain in his right hand. Something has gone wrong, he realized as he held it up in front of him. His eyes widened as he saw that Adam was peeling away from the surface of his palm. Gendo tried to push the embryonic angel back onto his skin, but every time he touched the tiny creature his fingers came afire with pain.

"Damn!" he swore as the embryo at last broke free, leaving alarge, burn-like wound on his palm. Gendo clutched his hand in agony and thrust it into the LCL in an attempt to deaden the intense pain. After a few seconds, the oxygen-carrying fluid had a mild effect, and he was able to look around to see what had become of the First Angel.

The glowing, embryonic form flopped around on the small island in the middle of the LCL lake for a few seconds, then shuddered and started to grow. Four wings spread from its back, and it took on the shape it had held during the Second Impact. Still, however, it was very small.

Gendo reached for it, but missed, stumbled, and landed on his wounded hand. In agony, he again thrust his hand into the LCL.

Gendo was horrified to see Adam move to hover in front of Rei, still growing. After a moment, Adam turned towards Lilith and tried to approach her. However, as the tiny angel came close to the giant, some force seemed to push it away. Adam tried three times, but to no avail.

Seemingly resigned to the fact that it could not unite with Lilith, the angel hovered back towards Rei.

Gendo overcame the pain in his palm, leaped forward, and attempted to seize Adam, but the angel nimbly eluded his grasp and shot towards the albino girl. Gendo fell to the floor horrified as he watched it rocket towards Rei, entering her mouth.

Rei clutched at her throat for a moment, as if she was choking, but whatever had caused her to do so quickly disappeared. She stood stock-still for amoment, and then began to glow.

Pearly light radiated from her skin, and her eyes had the appearance of fire. The glow only lasted for about a minute; as Gendo was at last picking himself up, still clutching his wounded hand, the glow subsided.

Gendo stared at Rei for a moment, then asked, "What happened?"

"Adam was inside of me, but... he is gone now," Rei said. "It seems the scenario has changed."

"So it has," Gendo said, looking at his damaged palm. Someone resisted my plan probably my damned son. Well, next time I'll be more careful. I will not be defeated! he raged mentally. He dug his fingers into his palm, wincing at the pain. /Yui/, he thought, I will have you back. God himself cannot stop me!

Gendo fumed as he stormed across the LCL lake, so caught up in his anger that he did not see what Rei was doing. She stood at Lilith's foot, staring at the retreating form of the Commander. And as she watched him, her gaze grew progressively darker, concentrating for one moment into an expression of rage. As Gendo left the LCL, though, Rei's face became blank. She mechanically followed the Commander out of Terminal Dogma.

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The explosive force of the firestorm eradicated most of what remained of Tokyo-3. The foundations of destroyed buildings were filled up by flying dirt and debris, and the few remaining walls were shattered into millions of pieces of rubble that were further broken down by the intense heat and strong wind as they blew through the air. A large part of the new lake was vaporized, and the last traces of the northern portion of Tokyo-3 disappeared.

Through the haze of fire and destruction, Shinji saw that EVA-05 was still standing. As the explosion receded, leaving a thousand small blazes burning in its wake, he noticed that the white Eva had managed to erect an AT field around itself.

"Are you OK, Shinji?" Misato asked over the vidlink.

"I'm fine..." he replied, as he willed his EVA-01 to walk towards the remaining production-model Eva. He was still over half a kilometer away when he saw the large biomechanical robot wave at him. Thrown off by the odd gesture, Shinji stopped his advance. EVA-05 then slumped as its neck plate opened and the entry plug ejected.

Shinji immediately moved forward to recover the plug, but stopped when Misato said, "We saw the entry plug ejection, Shinji. You don't need to worry about recovery. With the northern section totally leveled, we shouldn't have too much trouble getting to it... I want you to return to headquarters."

Shinji stopped for a moment. He wanted to see who had been piloting the rebellious Eva, but being in EVA-01 had always been tiring. The effect was only enhanced by the mental effort he exerted to keep from thinking about what he had done in the biomechanical robot only three days ago. Still, the prospect of meeting the pilot drew him...

His problem was solved quickly when Misato slyly added, "Besides, Ihear there's someone down in the infirmary who's very interested in seeing you again right away."

Shinji's only consolation was that Asuka wasn't seeing his bright red blush of embarrassment.

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Rei sat naked on the edge of her bed in the basement of NERV headquarters, gazing intently into the surrounding darkness. Her outward calm, however, disguised a rapid heartbeat and irregular breathing. Her hair, damp though the room was cool, hung limply on her forehead.

Darkness surrounded her. Suddenly, a flash of light appeared directly in front of her and a glowing ocean of particles began moving away from the center of her visual field.

I have never seen this... she thought, as the strange memory replayed itself over and over in her head. Darkness... and then light... I do not understand the meaning... She shook her head, and the repetitious vision cleared from her mind. /I do not want to stay here alone right now/, she thought, and began to dress.

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Shinji cringed back in his chair briefly, then stared at the floor.

Asuka shook her head and dropped her spoon back into the bowl, reaching out to grab his chin. She tilted Shinji's face up so that he was looking at her again. "Don't pout, stupid," she said. "I didn't really mean that. I just... I've been a big burden on everyone for a while, and it's important to me that I do things for myself right now even if they're really simple."

"So y-you're not mad at me?" Shinji asked quietly. He looked as if he were fighting to keep from running out of the room.

"Of course not, silly. I... I just overreacted," Asuka replied. Seeing Shinji relax a little, Asuka continued, "In fact, I really appreciate your offering to help, but... right now, I've got to be the one who takes care of me even with something as basic as eating."

The traces of Asuka's attempts to do just that were now gracing her red gown. Because she had gone nearly a week without moving, her muscles had atrophied considerably and controlling them was a bit difficult. After she had spilled several spoonfuls of the thick stew on herself, Shinji had offered to help. Her loud negative response had nearly driven him from the room.

"Oh..." Shinji said. "Okay." He relaxed further in the chair.

Asuka released his chin and grabbed the spoon again. With some effort, she managed to get most of the stew she picked up with it into her mouth. She continued with her extremely messy eating, somehow getting about half of the bowl into her mouth. At last, she pushed the small rolling table that had the bowl on it away, and said, "Oh, that felt good. But I want to have your cooking again. This hospital food is so... bland."

Shinji made an embarrassed smile and blushed. He was not used to getting so much attention from the fiery pilot of EVA-02. Forgetting himself, he grabbed anapkin and wiped a bit of food off Asuka's cheek. He realized the error almost instantly when she narrowed her eyes, but she didn't yell at him. Instead she smiled and said, "Thanks," making Shinji even more confused.

Asuka stared at the boy briefly, observing his unusually gaunt condition. After a moment, she asked, "Shinji, have you been eating any of your cooking?"

Shinji looked down again, and replied, "I... no. I haven't felt much like eating recently."

"Because of me?"

"You, and... some other things..." Shinji said, seeming to shrink somewhat in his chair.

Asuka reached towards Shinji again, but stopped halfway through the motion. The boy looked almost like he was about to cry. Asuka's expression softened. She gently rested her hand on Shinji's shoulder and squeezed. Quietly, she said, "Shinji, I... I know I haven't been the best roommate or friend in the past. But I'd like to change that.

So if you need to talk about... whatever is hurting you... I... I'm willing to listen."

Shinji looked up, his eyes brimming with tears, but he was wearing a small, sad smile. "I... I don't think I'm ready yet," he replied, his voice nearly cracking, "But... thank you very much for offering."

Asuka smiled back, then was taken with a powerful yawn. Embarrassed, she explained, "I know it sounds weird, but I'm really sleepy. All that time Ispent comatose didn't do much good for me. I think I'll go to bed soon." Shinji nodded, and leaned back in his chair, wiping the moisture out of his eyes.

A few moments went by, and then Shinji realized that Asuka was giving him an irritated stare. He returned a questioning gaze, and she replied, "Well, Ican't sleep in this gravy-covered thing, Dummkopf! And I'm not going to change in front of you!" Shinji reddened, and almost fell over as he stood up too fast.

Shinji quickly retreated from the room, chased by Asuka's snort and call of"Pervert!" But he had seen as he left that the customary epithet had been accompanied by a smile.

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"Then you feel the danger is past?" Kouzou asked. Gendo's office had grown even colder, causing Kouzou's joints to ache. Next time, I'll just confer with him on a secure phone, Kouzou thought as he fought to keep himself from shivering.

"Temporarily. My efforts down in Terminal Dogma to prevent Third Impact, combined with the rebellion of EVA-05, set SEELE back immensely. They will spend a great deal of time trying to figure out what exactly went wrong. By the time they understand what happened, I will be in a position to crush them if I so choose."

Kouzou nodded and moved to the next item on his mental agenda. "Major Katsuragi has formally requested that I release Shinji back into her care," Kouzou informed the younger man. "She feels that he should not have to spend any more time in the complex than necessary."

Gendo nodded, but said, "The boy may leave headquarters if he wishes.

Do not, however, remand him to Major Katsuragi's custody. Let him go wherever he wants."

"I will have him watched, of course," Kouzou said. "There is the danger from the EVA-05 pilot."

"There's still no progress on finding him?" Gendo asked, his tone dark.

"None. Despite the lack of cover around the plug's landing site, the recovery teams could find no trace of him," Kouzou said, shaking his head."Our investigative team has discovered unmistakable signs that the dummy plug was a clone and not software. The LCL was saved in case an absorption event occurred, but the circumstantial evidence does not really agree with such an explanation."

Gendo frowned. "I am not pleased with this outcome. I will expect Lieutenant Ibuki's analysis of the LCL tomorrow morning, so that this matter can be cleared up.

"Still, there is no reason to be worried. Have the First Child watched, but do not interfere if SEELE's pilot tries to contact him. The health and safety of the boy may no longer be such a high priority."

Kouzou stiffened at the implication, but coldly replied, "Yes, commander."

Gendo raised an eyebrow, but did not comment on Fuyutsuki's obvious reticence. Instead he said, "The Spear."

"Our crews have retrieved Longinus Lance. Do you want it replaced in Lilith's side?"

"No. For now, just place it in storage."

Kouzou frowned again, but nodded. "As you wish."

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"He just needs a little time, I'm sure," Makoto said. He and Misato were both seated on the couch in her apartment, though neither one was holding a beer, for once. Misato was clearly agitated, and drummed her fingers furiously on the cushions.

"But after Asuka woke up and those Evangelions were destroyed, I just thought he'd be able to..." she said, trailing off.

Makoto smiled and said, "Hey, it's not your fault. All that business with Kaoru had to have hurt him severely. Asuka may be back, but he's still got a lot to work out."

Misato pulled a stray hair out from in front of her face. "You're certainly being very perceptive today."

Makoto grinned. "I'm a man of many skills," he said. "I know that," Misato said, reveling in the furious blush the statement elicited from the technician. "I'm just worried... if Shinji somehow found out what was piloting those Evas, he might... he might lose it."

Makoto's grin grew even wider as he said, "I thought of that, too. To make sure it didn't happen, I decided to use the computer skills that enabled me to uncover some secrets for you to put the lid back on one. NERV should thank me for making an ironclad firewall around at least one file. Only you, Fuyutsuki, or the Commander can access that report now."

Misato impulsively hugged the technician. "Thank you," she said. Not expecting this reaction, Makoto could barely decide whether to feel absolute joy or utter terror.

The embrace was cut short by a quiet knock at the door. Misato and Makoto both stood up quickly. Misato was running for the door immediately, with Makoto following more at a more leisurely pace. But while the person at the door was asurprise, Misato was still disappointed. "Rei?" she asked.

The girl stood outside the door with her head bowed, dressed in her school clothes. Rei raised her face to look at Misato and asked, "Is Shinji here?"

Misato was somewhat taken aback by the question, but replied, "No, Rei. I'm sorry, I have no idea where he is. Do you want to come in for a minute?Makoto and I were about to have dinner. It's instant, but..."

Rei paused for a moment as if considering the offer, then graced Misato with a slight smile. "If it is no trouble..." she replied as the Major gaped.

"Oh... oh no, it's no trouble at all," Misato said, moving out of the doorway. The young pilot entered, nodding to Misato and Makoto as she did. Misato ran off to the kitchen to get some more of the ready-made noodles cooking. Makoto smiled nervously at Rei as she removed her shoes. He had never had any real idea how to deal with the strange girl.

/She's just too quiet/, he thought, It's not normal for a girl these days to be like that. He was instantly disproved, however, as Rei giggled softly. Makoto's eyebrows went up and his jaw went down he'd never heard her do that before. "Wha..." he squeaked.

Rei giggled again. "You're preening like a bantam rooster for Misato," she said quietly. Makoto's jaw hung open awkwardly. He'd never heard a sentence that inventive out of her... ever. Makoto was still staring at Rei in shock when Misato brought the food in.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Twilight had passed, and the room was dark. Shinji still didn't feel that he could go back to Misato's home. Something kept calling him back here... ...back to Kaoru's room.

The floor was uncomfortable underneath him, but Shinji barely noticed.

The SDAT was drowning out all the noises that the world might make, and his tightly shut eyes blocked out all sights. Sleep had just managed to draw him into its fold, and the dream was beginning again.

Shinji's face had no expression, but in his mind he was smiling. His memory was again playing back for him the sight of Kaoru humming the "Ode to Joy." And so Shinji did not hear the door open. And he did not hear the pad of feet through the apartment. Locked in the throes of his dream, he did not hear any of these things, nor could he have seen them even with open eyes, because night had brought such total darkness to the apartment.

The person who had entered stood in the door of the room, carefully and quietly removing his plugsuit. The synchronization-boosting clothing was left by the door as the newcomer made his way to a dresser, removing nightclothes from it and pulling them on.

Shinji groaned quietly. The dream was taking its usual dark turn. He relived his tortured descent through NERV headquarters, his heart and mind torn by his friend's betrayal. The newcomer turned, alerted by the sound to the distress of the boy sleeping on the floor.

The newcomer frowned and sighed. He walked over to the boy, and whispered,"Not tonight, Shinji-kun." He knelt by the pilot of EVA-01, gently slipping one arm under Shinji's neck and the other under his knees. With just aslight grunt of exertion, he lifted Shinji and put him on the bed. Shinji's face immediately eased, and the tension in his muscles evaporated further as the newcomer slipped into the bed beside him.

"Sweet dreams, Shinji-kun," Kaoru sighed as he put one arm around his friend. And lost in sleep, Shinji also sighed contentedly. For his dream was playing back the memory of a smiling Kaoru saying, "I love you."

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Next week, look for Part Three: "Behold, how good and pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!"

Sparky