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Like A Knife Part 16

*Cammy’s POV*

I got into my car hesitantly, wishing I didn’t have to leave him. I watched his smile slowly morph to a frown as I backed out of his driveway, leaving him to wonder why I wasn’t giving him my utmost attention. After all, I loved him, and he knew it. But every day he seemed less and less convinced that I was telling the truth about my feelings; I could see it in his eyes.

I regretted the moment Brendon has interrupted his sentence. Now I wished I had listened to him more closely, as now I was lingering on every word that seemed to foreign and distant to me. Please, whatever he was planning on saying, just let him tell me later. And please God, let it be the words I’ve been hoping and wishing for him to say for so long. Those three words that meant the world.

I love you. That’s all it would take for me to be happy, and yet, he held them from me, as if to take away my light and watch me squirm. Damn, my emotions always go the better half of me, and I truly despised it.

I pulled into the small bakery on the corner of South Street, sitting isolated and standing proud toward the dark sky. It was about ten thirty now, and I was worried that they wouldn’t be open. But, much to Pete’s comfort, they were just about to close. I rushed inside and stood at the counter, ready to order.

“Hi. I’d like two large boxes of red velvet cupcakes, please?” I requested the stout woman standing at the counter, patiently waiting for her shift to be over.

She walked behind the racks of cakes and brought back two big boxes of Pete’s favorite cupcakes. I gladly took the box, eager to see Pete’s face when I handed them to him. I left the woman her money and returned to me car, which was still running. The radio was on, and ironically, I Write Sins Not Tragedies began playing. I smiled to myself and began down the road to Pete’s familiar house. His favorite car sat in the driveway that he had always wanted since I had known him. I pulled up next to it and shut the engine off; Pete came running from inside his house and hugged me quickly before grabbing the two boxes of pastries.

“Come in. I’m pretty lonely here,” He insisted, motioning for me to follow him inside. I did so obediently and sat down in his living room, on the white couch near a large window. Pete sat down on the chair next to me, and anxiously opened the box to find his beloved cupcakes. “I love you, Cammy. You’re the only person I know who would go out at ten thirty to buy me these. Seriously, you’re awesome.”

I smiled and took one from the box. He indulged in the sweet, fluffy piece of food and swallowed.

“Pete? I need to talk to you about something. I’m worried about the fight between you and Ry. I…I heard all about it. I just want you to know that it wasn’t his fault. Really,” I assured him.

“He told me the story, Cams. Don’t try to tell me differently. I know what he told me. I know it was him, and…and I hate him for it,” He explained.

“You can’t hate him. I won’t let you, Petey. Please, just tell him you didn’t mean it, and everything will be fine,” I tried to persuade him.

“How can I when I know that he was the one who hurt you? Who took all the life form your eyes? It’s difficult knowing there’s a reason for it. I love you, Cammy. I can’t let someone just get away with hurting you like that,” He continued.

“Come on, Pete. Please, I can’t live with myself knowing I tore two best friends apart. Just…Please, tell him you weren’t listening to what you were saying. Tell him you messed up,” I pleaded with him. “If you ever want to see the life in my eyes again, just tell him you’re sorry.”

“If you say so, if you want me to, I will. As long as you get back to your old self, Cammy,” Pete told me, smiling. “I’ll say something to him later.”

“Good. That gives me some time to spend with Patty. I told him that I would see him today and I never did…I have to get it off my conscience,” I explained to him, grinning. I was more than overjoyed when he told me he would talk to Ry. “Can I stay here tonight? I don’t feel like driving back to my place.”

“You bought me cupcakes. I owe you, so yeah. Of course you can stay. And then tomorrow we can go do something together,” He informed me. “I’ll get you some clothes to sleep in, and you can take a shower if you want. Sound good?” He asked me.

“Perfect,” I replied, waiting for him to return with the clothes. He threw me a pair of baggy sweatpants and an extra large Chicago tee shirt. I got up and left for the bathroom, delighted to finally relax.

After getting Pete’s clothes on, I returned to the living room, where Hemmingway lay on top of him. He was stretched out on his largest couch, half asleep. I smiled and lay down next to him. It was the only couch big enough for me to sleep on, and I was lucky it was large enough for two people.

“I’ll see you in the morning, Cams. Good night,” Pete whispered to me, turning to face me. I smiled.

“Good night, Pete,” I whispered back.

And with that, I was off in a deep, well desired sleep.
-Morning-

I woke up, arms wrapped around Pete. I quickly moved them, a little embarrassed with myself, hoping he wasn’t conscious enough to feel my arms around his body. It was a little awkward to say the least, so I rubbed my eyes and sat up. I still couldn’t tell if he was up or not; all I know was he was breathing evenly, facing the opposite side of the couch.

“Good morning, Cammy,” He said, his voice scratchy from his sleep. I smiled at him.

“Morning, Peter Panda,” I replied. “So what are we doing today? I’m curious.”

“Way to let me wake up,” He laughed. “I was thinking we could go to that field we always used to go to when we were younger. Remember that?” He suggested, wondering if I could remember one of my most vivid memories between us.

There was a huge meadow, high on a hill surrounded by thick trees on any side that wasn’t visible from the road. No one knew about it except me and the guys, and some days when we were skipping school we would go to hang out there. The teachers always became a little suspicious with us when nine of their students, that just happened to be best friends, were missing for a day once in a while.

Ryan, Brendon, Spencer, Jon, Patrick, Pete, Joe and Andy and I would go there and learn new things about each other, things that would never be repeated anywhere else. Things that nobody else knew about us; it’s where our friendships blossomed and became the best things that would ever happen to us.

“Of course I remember,” I admitted, smiling upon thinking about it. “Let’s eat some breakfast and go. I can’t wait to see it again, after these last few years.”

We both knew why we hadn’t been there in the last few years. I didn’t want to say it, but I was fully aware; we had drifted apart lately. I hated it. I wanted everything to be back to the way they were when I was just a school girl, experimenting with my life, making dumb decisions and taking risky chances. Now I’m a distraught twenty year old, caring about everything that people thinks about me, wishing I had lived in those moments longer.

We ate breakfast and headed out in Pete’s car to the small patch of grass on the corner of the street a block from the high school. He parked his car on the side of the road, and we got out, preparing to relive memories that would stay with us forever.