Categories > Original > Humor > Crack Series: Room 205
Mr. H shouted as his students filed into the long, yellow “short bus”(as his students had dubbed it) that arrived promptly fifteen minutes late. Rico stumbled on the steps with a quick “Whoopsie” and a giggle. Mr. H certainly agreed his students should've been on the short bus, given how mentally challenged they were.
Soon they had filled the bus and were on their merry way down the street. Bernard leaned out the window and yelled to a group of girls, “Show us your BOOBS!”
Why, you might ask, had the sixth period of Room 205 of the third floor of Boishington Academy suddenly decided to take a campus visit to the official Boishington University? The answer eluded many. Even so, they now drove on the freeway towards freedom. (?)
Van huffed as they came to a stop in the heavy traffic. “Man, this is gay.”
Robin leaned over the back of Van's seat. “You're gay.”
Van's eye twitched. “Yeah? What of it?”
“Hey, fuck you!” Robin shouted as he stood, “Wanna take this outside?”
Van raised a “are-you-stupid-we're-in-a-not-so-moving-vehicle” eyebow. He turned from Robin muttering, “Fuckin' homophobe.”
Robin sighed as he gazed out the window. 'Oh, Van' he thought, 'If only you knew how much I truly love you...'
Meanwhile...
Rico Suave(who happens to be male) slid in next to Van. “I like gay men.”
Van smiled “Thank you.”
Mr. H shouted, “We're almost there!”
Sequoia said ruthlessly, “We're still in traffic douchebag.”
Mr. H literally walked up and bitch slapped his student, “Shut yo mouth.” He then threw Sequoia over his shoulder.
Sequoia kicked and fought. “What the fuck?! Put me down!!” He squirmed “I don't take man-handling lightly!”
Mr. H frowned. “Don't make me grope you. You're underage, and frankly, I do not plan on becoming a pedophile for an unruly student.”
Sequoia ceased his struggles immediately and flopped onto Mr. H's shoulder with an “Ew.”
“You know I like it rough, baby.” Mr. H grinned.
Dakota, Sequoia's dashing twin sister, the second half of the husky duo, shrieked, “Mr. H! That's nasty!”
Mr. H winked, “Not unless you've done it.”
“Mr. H!”
Van spoke “That's fairly disturbing.”
“Fairly?!” Dakota screamed.
“I can't hear my i-pooood.” Fangirl #2 commented in a sing-song voice.
“No one cares.” Mr. H informed the ignorant student.
Suddenly, the bus jerked into motion.
“Whoo! My brain powers are activating!” Taylor yelled in triumph.
“Idiot.” Fangirl #1 said.
“Dude, that was a totally gnarly fire. I hope they catch the monkey that caused it.” Fangirl #3 said solemnly.
A woman smiled kindly at their group. “Hi. I'm Kelly. I'll be your tour guide this morning.”
Lana scoffed at the blonde-haired-blue-eyed-tour-guide. She whispered to Kanan, “Oh god, It's tour guide Barbie.”
Bernard busted in, “No, she obviously said she was Kelly, Barbie's little sister.”
“Right this way please,” Kelly said as she began to lead the group.
Bash, the Turkish student in Room 205, wrapped an arm around Kelly. “So, what's your sign?”
Kelly thought a moment, “Um... vertigo.”
“You mean Virgo?” Bash supplied.
Kelly grinned, “Yeah! That's it.”
Lana rolled her eyes. “Oh god. Doesn't even know her sign.
Kelly stopped in front of a building. “This is our library. Umm, there's about 8 and a half floors in our library and-”
“How the hell do you get half a floor?” Van cut in.
Kelly looked thoughtful, “I don't really know...”
“She means there's nine floors.” A man stepped up to the group. “I'm Io.”
Navi peered around from behind Io. “What're you doing here?” She inquired to the class.
Van said, “Campus visit.”
“Oh. I'm skipping school,” Navi replied.
Mr. H appeared at the front of the group. “That's not very good for your education.”
“Shut it, Mr. H.”
Mr. H clasped a hand over his dearly wounded heart, “Oh, you hurt me so!”
Navi growled, “I said can it.”
“Oh, the burn!”
Kelly smiled up at Io. “Hiiii, Ioooo,” she sang.
“Hey, babe. Wanna ditch these losers?” He replied.
“Sure, Io!”
“Well, let's go!”
Together, they looped arms and paraded away from the group.
Bash gaped, “She led me on.”
Lana scoffed, “I think she was too stupid for that.”
“We have no more tour guide.” Taylor commented.
Mr. H sighed, “Have fun finding things to do.”
What a wonderful class experience....
Soon they had filled the bus and were on their merry way down the street. Bernard leaned out the window and yelled to a group of girls, “Show us your BOOBS!”
Why, you might ask, had the sixth period of Room 205 of the third floor of Boishington Academy suddenly decided to take a campus visit to the official Boishington University? The answer eluded many. Even so, they now drove on the freeway towards freedom. (?)
Van huffed as they came to a stop in the heavy traffic. “Man, this is gay.”
Robin leaned over the back of Van's seat. “You're gay.”
Van's eye twitched. “Yeah? What of it?”
“Hey, fuck you!” Robin shouted as he stood, “Wanna take this outside?”
Van raised a “are-you-stupid-we're-in-a-not-so-moving-vehicle” eyebow. He turned from Robin muttering, “Fuckin' homophobe.”
Robin sighed as he gazed out the window. 'Oh, Van' he thought, 'If only you knew how much I truly love you...'
Meanwhile...
Rico Suave(who happens to be male) slid in next to Van. “I like gay men.”
Van smiled “Thank you.”
Mr. H shouted, “We're almost there!”
Sequoia said ruthlessly, “We're still in traffic douchebag.”
Mr. H literally walked up and bitch slapped his student, “Shut yo mouth.” He then threw Sequoia over his shoulder.
Sequoia kicked and fought. “What the fuck?! Put me down!!” He squirmed “I don't take man-handling lightly!”
Mr. H frowned. “Don't make me grope you. You're underage, and frankly, I do not plan on becoming a pedophile for an unruly student.”
Sequoia ceased his struggles immediately and flopped onto Mr. H's shoulder with an “Ew.”
“You know I like it rough, baby.” Mr. H grinned.
Dakota, Sequoia's dashing twin sister, the second half of the husky duo, shrieked, “Mr. H! That's nasty!”
Mr. H winked, “Not unless you've done it.”
“Mr. H!”
Van spoke “That's fairly disturbing.”
“Fairly?!” Dakota screamed.
“I can't hear my i-pooood.” Fangirl #2 commented in a sing-song voice.
“No one cares.” Mr. H informed the ignorant student.
Suddenly, the bus jerked into motion.
“Whoo! My brain powers are activating!” Taylor yelled in triumph.
“Idiot.” Fangirl #1 said.
“Dude, that was a totally gnarly fire. I hope they catch the monkey that caused it.” Fangirl #3 said solemnly.
A woman smiled kindly at their group. “Hi. I'm Kelly. I'll be your tour guide this morning.”
Lana scoffed at the blonde-haired-blue-eyed-tour-guide. She whispered to Kanan, “Oh god, It's tour guide Barbie.”
Bernard busted in, “No, she obviously said she was Kelly, Barbie's little sister.”
“Right this way please,” Kelly said as she began to lead the group.
Bash, the Turkish student in Room 205, wrapped an arm around Kelly. “So, what's your sign?”
Kelly thought a moment, “Um... vertigo.”
“You mean Virgo?” Bash supplied.
Kelly grinned, “Yeah! That's it.”
Lana rolled her eyes. “Oh god. Doesn't even know her sign.
Kelly stopped in front of a building. “This is our library. Umm, there's about 8 and a half floors in our library and-”
“How the hell do you get half a floor?” Van cut in.
Kelly looked thoughtful, “I don't really know...”
“She means there's nine floors.” A man stepped up to the group. “I'm Io.”
Navi peered around from behind Io. “What're you doing here?” She inquired to the class.
Van said, “Campus visit.”
“Oh. I'm skipping school,” Navi replied.
Mr. H appeared at the front of the group. “That's not very good for your education.”
“Shut it, Mr. H.”
Mr. H clasped a hand over his dearly wounded heart, “Oh, you hurt me so!”
Navi growled, “I said can it.”
“Oh, the burn!”
Kelly smiled up at Io. “Hiiii, Ioooo,” she sang.
“Hey, babe. Wanna ditch these losers?” He replied.
“Sure, Io!”
“Well, let's go!”
Together, they looped arms and paraded away from the group.
Bash gaped, “She led me on.”
Lana scoffed, “I think she was too stupid for that.”
“We have no more tour guide.” Taylor commented.
Mr. H sighed, “Have fun finding things to do.”
What a wonderful class experience....
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