FicWad

SHOTGUN BLUES

My mom lies prone in the street, blood gurgling from her chest. She'd raced in to help Izzy and had obviously gotten into the line of fire. Pushing Axl away from me, I crawl over to her, tears already on my cheeks.

Taking her hand, I look down into her eyes. She's gasping for breath and her eyes are already beginning to glaze. I squeeze her hand, my crying becoming uncontrollable.

"Please," I gasp. "Please don't go..."

She smiles weakly, a bloody hand coming up to brush my hair from my face. Time is standing still in that odd way it does when something bad happens. It was like this when mom told me that my first cat had died. And now it's doing it again as my mother lies in the middle of a street, her life slowly draining into the ground.

"You're so handsome Saul," she whispers, every word an effort to say. "You're going to grow into a great man." She tries to swallow and I can see blood in her mouth. Reaching down, I gently brush it from her lips. "Take care of Jeff," she hoarsely continues. "He's going to need you."

Hands grab my waist and pull me away. I cry harder as my fingers brush over my mother's. The EMT's race in and she's put onto a stretcher. I can tell from the looks on her face that it's not going to be good. But no-one says anything. The police officer just holds me close, trying to comfort me as I struggle and scream, yelling for my mom and hoping that she can hear me telling her that I love her.

The officer carries on holding me, his strong hands stroking me as he whispers words of comfort in my ear. I've never known the police to be so kind but I suppose it happens when you've just seen your mother shot. He loosens his grip as the ambulance screams off, my voice echoing after it. I want to be there with her to hold her hand and tell her everything's going to be okay. Because it will be okay. It's got to be okay. She can't die, she's my mom. Mom's aren't supposed to die.

Eventually the he lets me go and I sink to the ground, cradling my head in my hands as I cry. I rock back and forth, my voice a wretched sound as it bounces off the buildings. Suddenly I feel soft fingers glide through my hair as a familiar voice whispers, "I'm here..."

Through bloodshot eyes, I see Izzy sitting beside me. His own eyes are filled with tears as he wraps his arms around me, holding me close. I never thought I'd need him in this way, never thought he'd be the one comforting me. I've always been the strong one, always been the one to watch out for him. But, like he's said, relationships go both ways and now it's his turn to watch over me.

He holds me close, my head resting in the crook of his neck, whispering between his own sobs. His hands gently stroke my hair, a child-like gesture that seems to be helping. I remember my mom doing it all those years ago. And now Izzy's doing it in pretty much the same way.

Eventually the crying stops and I look up at him, brushing those long strands of silky fine hair out of his eyes.

"Where's Axl...?" I quietly ask.

He sighs, breath shaky.

"They're arrested him," his voice is quiet, no need for it to be loud. "They're going to want to question us at some point." He sighs and I watch as he squeezes his eyes shut, fighting off the memories. "Me especially."

My voice is quiet, "Because of...?"

Izzy's eyes snap open, little flecks of anger dancing in them.

"Because of everything he's done," he snaps. "The rapes, the beatings, the kidnappings and now the shooting of your mother. Do you want him to get away with that?"

I shake my head sadly, the memory of my mother lying in the road still hauntingly fresh.

The scene melts away like the closing credits of a film, leaving me and Izzy sitting in the middle of the street. As the last of the police cars disappear, Izzy helps me to my feet, supporting me with a hand in my back. His other hand gently holds mine, his thumb sweeping small circles over the back of my finger. He looks at me with concerned eyes, his brow gently furrowing.

"Do you want to go to the hospital?" his voice is quiet.

I nod, letting out a heavy sigh as I do. Of course I want to go to the hospital. It was a stupid question to ask but Izzy's no mind reader.

Still stroking my fingers, he leads me to my mother's car. It's still parked in the middle of the street, looking forlorn and lonely without her behind the wheel. Gently Izzy helps me into the passenger seat, the seat I was sitting in less than an hour ago, my mom telling me off for having my feet on the dash.

~~~~

We ride in silence to the hospital, a heavy silence that just rips your insides apart. I'm more scared now than I was when Axl took Izzy from me. Because now he's taking the one person who's been a constant in my life away. He's taking her away, one drop at a time.

~~~~

The hospital is a flurry of activity, yet Izzy and I just glide in, cutting through the sea of white coats and blood like fish. Eventually we find a doctor and, in hushed tones, Izzy explains why we're here. He ushers us into a small, sparsely furnished room and his face falls. Instantly my heart falls with it, hitting the floor like a stone.

He places a hand on my shoulder and his voice is quiet as he says, "I'm sorry Saul. She didn't make it."

His voice disappears into a fog of static as my head swims. I stand for a moment, swaying and feeling ill as the news sinks in. Then I let out a cry of agony as I fall to my knees. My spirit desperately battles with my body, trying to get free and follow her as my voice bounces around the tiny space.

She's dead, my mother, my angel in disguise, the woman who rescued me from so many scrapes, is dead. Gone. Forever. Never will she hug me again. Never will she smile and sing again.

I cry and shake, just wanting to be gone from this awful place. I can smell her death, sweet and sickly and untimely.

And then there are arms around. Slender, yet strong, arms encircle my chest, pulling me to a tiny, breathing body. Soft lips are pressed to my temple and, for a split second, I believe that it's her. But on opening my eyes, I find myself looking into the dark, tear-filled eyes of Izzy. His face is wet with tears yet he makes no noise, instead letting me cry for both of us. I shake and stare at him, hands grabbing for him, needing to feel that he's alive and real. He lets me, just kneeling and crying as my hands slide into the soft waves of his hair, my fingers tightening in it as I pull him to me. Resting my forehead against his, we stare at each other, tiny, shuddering sobs still escaping my mouth. He reaches out a hand and gently strokes my face, fingers ghosting along my cheeks and to my lips. Coughing back a throat of gunk, I gently kiss his fingers, my eyes never leaving his. A shadow of a smile glides over his lips and I press mine to his, desperate for any kind of human contact. Izzy pants as my hands tangle in his hair, pulling our mouths tightly together, bruising and chaffing our lips. But I don't care and neither does he as we collapse to the floor of the hospital, hungrily kissing. There's so much said in that small gesture. I'm sorry, I love you, I'm here for you, please don't leave me. It's all there, unsaid words hidden deep within a kiss. Izzy's hands grip the back of my shoulders, pulling me as close to him as possible, our tongues easily gliding into the others mouth, tenderly touching and tasting. Feelings that have been dead for a while are reignited. We no longer have to live in fear. My mother may be dead but her death hasn't been in vein. Axl is now behind bars, hopefully for the rest of his life.

Slowly, and with regret, Izzy pulls away. His eyes are glazed and his lips are bright red from where I've bitten them. He leans forward, gently pressing a kiss to the tip of my nose. I feel myself smile a little as he helps me to my feet.

"Come on." His voice is hushed. "Let's go. It's going to be a long few days."

With his hand held in mine, we quietly leave the hospital, heading home to begin our new life together.