Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Positive Mental Attitude

I’m not you average woman

by blue-flame 0 reviews

Gerard finally meets Ces and they don’t exactly hit it off…

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Humor - Characters: Gerard Way - Published: 2008-05-15 - Updated: 2008-05-15 - 2038 words

“Ray, Gerard! Bout time you got here. Even Mikey made it on time. Guys, This is Cesario Raleigh and Frank Iero. Cesario, as you know, is your team mate, and Frank will be driving TDP’s second car. Patrick, the TDP Principle is around, go say hi when you get the chance.” Damn, Ray was right about the likeness. Short dark hair with a few red and blue streaks, Hazel eyes, petite but toned fame. She stood next to a short, black haired dude with a faux hawk, covered in tattoos. Short compared to me, though they were both the same height. Stop staring! Say something before you they realise. Talk to Bob you fool.

“Erm. Did you get a new car Bob?” Bob looked at me quizzically as Ray and Frank got further acquainted.

“No, I’d never get rid of Betsy”

Weird. Ray didn’t bring his car, and I know it’s not Mikey’s.
“Then who’s is the Aston?”

“Oh, that’s mine.” Cesario said as if forgetting I was even in the room.

Pfft, might as well put a neon sign round your neck flashing ‘look at me!’.
“Nice. A little ostentatious…..” I mumbled as I turned back to Bob who was watching in amusement. But before I could speak Cesario cut in.

“Well the Koenigseg is too wide for the Moors and you wouldn’t believe how little luggage space my Zonda has. The Astons the most practical.” And with a smirk she turned away and walked over to Ray and new guy. That’s, like, a million pounds worth of super car. What the hell do they pay her!

“What? What just happened here?” I stood dumbfounded glancing from Bob to Cesario.

“I believe you just ate your own words. Ray told you she was something else.” Bob patted me on the back and wandered off towards the small group of people in what looked like a kitchen area.


Hah, that showed him. Ostentatious my arse. He’s the one living in a palatial estate. I love cars. I only need a one bedroom flat, so I invest my money in cars. I made my way over to who I assume is Mikey. I’ve been on edge since I found out I was joining TRW. I was stoked to get an F1 drive and thought I was going to team with Frank. I never dreamt I would get a seat in such a competitive car. But it came at the expense of Mikey’s seat, and let just say Gerard can be very vocal.

“Cesario, Right?” Mikey smiled and held out a hand. I shook it reluctantly, unsure if Mikey was as against my move as Gerard so publicly was.

“I know I am taking your race seat, but I want to be clear from the start I have no intention of causing a rift and I don’t want things to be awkward as were guna be stuck here for a week.”
“Don’t worry, I’m almost glad to be honest. Gee’s my brother, but he’s not easy to work and live with. Plus it’s the first time I’ve not been the second driver.”

“Wow, you live with him too?” God how full on must that be.

“Well were never home much so it made sense. We both have our own space, we only share a kitchen and come and go as we please. So, glad to be back on English soil?”

“More like mud! Got any ideas how to break the ice with Gerard?” As I glanced at Gerard I could have sworn he was glancing my way.

“Don’t worry about him. A few minutes on the naughty step and he will realize you come in peace”
“You don’t watch super nanny do you?”

“It’s like my favorite show! I swear kids just need a good spank. Don’t reward it for being good. It should be anyway!”

“Kids are gross and messy.” I scrunched my nose up at the though of little snotty brats running around making a mess.

“I don’t think I have ever met a woman so repulsed by the thought of children.”
“I’m not you average woman.”


Once I got out of my daze I headed over to the lounge area to sus out Frank. Turns out Frank’s from Jersey, but he went to Catholic school so we never met, and Patrick is from Chicago like Bob. Cesario was sat talking to Mikey on the smallest sofa ever for the past 20 minutes. Traitor.

After another hour or so Bob gathered our attention and we all quietened down.

“Right, know we are all acquainted hers what’s going to happen. Mr. Valo sends his apologies and a case of Champaign” Everyone cheered at the mention of alcohol.

“All right all right, shut the fuck up you piss heads. Anyways, we have this place for 5 days. There are seven of us and five rooms. As I have the power to fire you I get my own room, as does Patrick. Ray, you also get your own room. And so theirs no favoritism, Gerard and Ces, you are sharing the attic room, complete with en suite. Mikey and Frank, you have the room next to mine, so keep it quite as I need as much beauty sleep as I can get.”

Ces? Ok far more important things than names right now. You have got to be kidding me. I’ve not shared a room since I was eight and Mikey’s room had a leak in it.

“We are all sharing the cooking duties, I’m sure even Mikey can managed to make a Pot Noodle.”

“Hey! I can cook.”

“Heating up take out isn’t cooking. Anyway, tonight everyone chill and don’t go crazy on the champers, tomorrow we are going mountain biking to the big rock thingy about 20 miles away, so be warned. Right, where’s the cork screw?”

Stupid woman. Just a kid. ‘oh I’m too good to drink such cheap Champaign, I’ll stick to my Perrier’. I took a big gulp of my fifth glass of Champaign as I sat in the chair nearest the fire. I’ll show her tomorrow on that bike ride. I will not be beaten by a Champ Car driver. Look at her laughing and joking with Mikey and Ray and Bob. No-ones even spoken to me since I sat down. Screw them. I got up, a bit unsteady, and went to get another glass.


By half eleven I was beat. I stuck to water considering we have a 20k bike tomorrow. The guys are all great. Patrick’s a bit geeky, where as Bob’s more laid back. But that’s probably just cos’ it’s Pat’s first season in F1. Frank’s awesome. Such a hyper little guy. His tat’s are amazing. Kept mine quite though. Mikey great, totally cool with me joining and he’s cool to talk too. A little odd. Gerard, however had spent the entire night drinking and glaring at me across the room. Every time I turned round I could feel his eyes boring into me. I seriously have no idea what his problem is. I know I’m hardly welcome but we have to work together for Christ sake.

Walking into my room I got changed ad went straight to my bed. Mine was on the left, Gerard on the right. Both faced the glass doors that led out onto the balcony. Can’t wait for the morning. You must get an ace sunrise out across the Tor.
I must have dozed of cos I was woken up at some ungodly hour by a loud bang. Bolting upright I squinted into the darkness to see a shape sprawled on the floor.

“Gerard? Is that you?”

“No it’s the mother fucking tooth fairy” How many has he had? Might as well get this over with I guess.

“Look, Gerard, I think we need to settle whatever it is we…” Garrard hauled himself up and stumbled across to my bed and interrupted me before could finish.

“We need to settle nothing. Keep out of my way you usurper of brothers. Go home to Mommy and Daddy. I’m sure they will buy you a drive for next season.” I could see him sneering up at me in the moonlight.

“Don’t say another word about my parents you asshole. You know nothing about me or my family.” You can say what you like about me, water of a ducks back. But never slag off my parents.

“Oooh Daddies girl getting defensive” He took a big gulp of what I assumed was Champaign from a pint glass. I will not have anyone shit talk about my parents.

“I said shut it asswipe or you’ll be sorry”

“What you gunna do? Phone daddy and get him to tell Bob on me?” He was already on my last nerve and I had a whole season with him if I don’t kill him first.

“I said shut the fu….” I stopped mid sentence as the whole room it up. It was coming from the desk on the far wall.

“What the?” My phone! Who would ring this late. I got out of bed and went to pick it up.


Holy shit. Cesario just got out of bed, like, half naked. Nothing but a satrapy top and really short shorts that go all the way…

Stop it. Bad Gerard. She grabbed her phone and was stood over by the window door thing. Half of her was highlighted by the moonlight, the rest in shadow. Damn. I dropped to the floor never taking my eyes of the silhouette, and spilt some champers on my pant leg but right know I don’t care.


“Hey Mindy, what’s so pressing you ring me at….1am?” I walked over to the French windows so Gerard couldn’t eaves drop. I hate the feeling of being watched.

“You didn’t like that lamp in the hall did you?” She slurred. Drunk. Should a’ guessed. Why else would she ring this late? Revenge is sweet my dim-witted flatmate.

“The lamp my mother gave to be on her death bed?” Yeah I’m a bitch. I couldn’t help but chuckle as Mindy slowly processed what I just said. After a few seconds of silence Mindy spoke.

“Oh shit I am so sorry. I will find a new one that’s just like it. I’m so sorry….”
Mindy kept rambling on like a mad woman apologising over and over.

“Mindy? Mindy? SHUT UP! I’m joking. You were with me when I bought that lamp last year. It’s just a lamp. I’m sure I can afford a new one, or three.” I forgot how gullible she can be.

“Don’t do that! One day I will break something your mother gave you on her death bed and then you will be sorry!” Huh?

“How does that even work?”

“I. Um. Dunno. But you will see. Just you wait.” I have to admit drunken Mindy is funny.

“I’ll do that. Now how about you go have a big glass of water and go sleep off your inevitable hangover. I’ll text you tomorrow. And don’t forget to tell Sebastian I miss him.”

“Shit Sebastian. Ur, got to go, Byeee!” She hung up before I could yell. Poor Sebastian. He’s going to hate me when I get home.

When I tuned back round Gerard was slumped on the floor by my bed, his glass tilted and its contents sloshing onto the carpet, staring at me.

“What? Get up and go to bed or fuck off so I can get some sleep.”

I walked over and took his glass away before he made even more mess and put it on the dresser. Stepping over the arrogant dickhead I got back into bed, turning my back to Gerard. I could hear him shuffling around and swearing under his breath until I eventually got back to sleep.
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