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The e-mail, though somewhat intriguing, was not my main concern right at this very second. It was however going to need a lot of attention, that’s why I decided to call Kate and then turn my focus back to the said piece of information. I can’t say that I was looking forward to talking to my hormonal wife, but it couldn’t be avoided.

‘Hello? Kate, are you there?’ There was no sound coming from the end of the line, ‘Kate?’

‘What do you want, I know you don’t believe this but I am actually busy,’ She barked at me, ‘Hurry it up’

‘I lost a patient today’ I summed up, not really knowing how she’d take it.

‘Oh, baby, I’m so sorry’ She cooed, ‘Do you need to spend some time with Gee? Look, come home when you want, call me when you’re on your way back. I’ll order pizza, what do you think?’

‘That’d be nice, thanks Kate’ I sighed, impressed at my wife’s ability to swing from one emotion to another. She’s so bi-polar sometimes … wait. Was I analyzing my wife? I have to get out of this place.

‘Look, I really do have to go but I’ll pick up that Law and Order box set you wanted and we’ll hang out in front of the TV, yeah?’ I agreed, allowing my wife to go back to whatever she was up to.

‘Bye, Katie’ I closed the phone, ready to turn my attention to the e-mail.

Re: Cotards Syndrome, Electroconvulsive Therapy. I opened the message, it had information about how I would go about seeking treatment for Bob. The only thing that seems to have any sort of affect is a therapy that involves plugging electrodes into the side of someone’s head and then shocking them. Apparently, luckily I checked, they were able to perform this form of treatment on Bob here.

We had the proper equipment, but I had to check with the certain authorities that we were actually allowed to this to Bob. In all honesty, I hoped they’d say no, it’s cruel an oh-so-very inhumane. The pain is intense, pulsing throughout skin and then lobes, directly into the head. I’d prefer to put him on olanzapine or maybe ecsitalopram. Although, those drugs aren’t really used anymore.

I picked up my phone and pressed the ‘Reception’ button. There was a brief pause as I waited for Beth to pick up the phone, I was greeted by the sound of gentle humming, I guess she didn’t quite know that I could hear her and still had a tune she needed to express. I tried to work out what it was, but couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

‘Hello, anything I can do?’ She asked.

‘Uh, yeah, call Bob’s ward, tell them I’ve set up an appointment and I’m putting in an order for some medication. It’s called olanzapine and ecsitalopram, they’d have to check up with me but it’ll only be once a day’ I told her, knowing that she was competent enough to take it all down.

‘Uh, sure … Shall I set up a meeting for later?’ She enquired; I could hear a gentle scratch as she took down the notes with a pencil, probably in short hand. I bet she knew short hand.

‘Yes, and make sure they find out about Bob’s previous medical conditions, olanzapine usually causes an allergic reaction, kay?’ I asked, though sounded somewhat condescending, but then thought of a question to make up for it, ‘By the way, what were you humming just now?’

‘Oh’ She giggled slightly, pausing before she answered, ‘Umm … Let’s get it on by Marvin Gaye’

Beth clicked off, and I’m glad she did, I was beginning to get flashbacks of my shower the other day and I knew I’d put my foot in it if I stayed on the phone. I knew she’d set right onto the task I’d just given her. Bob, although he hadn’t been a patient of mine for that long a time, had made an impression on Beth. She was totally fascinated by the fact that he thought he was dead; she’d always talked to him kindly and with respect that most secretaries can’t even muster for their bosses. She’d probably make a better psychiatrist than I ever would, but I guess that’s irrelevant because by the time she gets a doctorate Bob should (Hopefully) be better.

A few minutes later she knocked the door with some news for me.

‘Patrick, they said he’s got an allergy to one of the drugs, they won’t work on their own. The department said that he can have the treatment today, or on Monday. If he has it today, they can do it at three or at eleven on Monday. Doctor Wentz says he wants to be there to overlook the treatment, but he says you can go ahead with it’ She exhaled, finishing with only one more question, ‘Anything else I can do for you?’

‘Uh, well, no. I’m okay. I need to check on Gerard, but he should be okay for now. He handled it pretty well, will you … Umm … Just ring and see if they need me up there, please?’ She left with a ‘No problem’, and was out of the door before I could think of anything else.

I returned to my computer, updated a few files and checked the rest of my emails. There was nothing else I had to do for about half an hour, so I put Windows Media Player onto random, using my MP3 player as a playlist. Some songs came on that I didn’t want to listen to, then a song that I’d made myself with Joe came on.

It was strange listening to both of out voices sing out, my guitar, his base, my drumming, some of his guitar, vocals from the both of us in turn. It was awesome, we’d recorded it months ago when I was still in college. It may have even been years ago. We tried to come up with snazzy titles but this one still made me smile, you’re crashing but you’re no wave.

I kept flicking though the tracks, knowing that I’d put another one or two more of our songs into it. After searching through about thirty tracks, I found one that was definitely done after one to many college evenings out. We’d called it ‘Grand Theft Autumn’, I wrote it for a girl I was trying to get but never did. In fact, she was the girl that made me rebound onto Kate.

Underneath the sound of my music was the sound of the telephone, ‘Reception’ showing up on the caller I.D. Beth was on the line. The nurses had been asking for permission to sedate Gerard again, he’d been sobbing so hard that he’d started to fit. They needed my permission and I’d have to sign one or two things but not straight away.

‘Sure, tell them to give him valium again, they know the dosage’ I ordered.

‘Right, by the way, Ray cancelled his appointment’ I thanked her, and put the phone back down onto the receiver. I flicked through my diary, crossing Ray off of the list of patients I had today. I didn’t even know I was supposed to be seeing him today.

I marked Bob down in my diary, deciding that the sooner we started the therapy the sooner it could end. I knew that I may not be able to stomach what I was about to do to him, but it is meant to help. Saying that electrocuting someone is going to help them is, in my opinion, nothing more than an attempt to ease my conscience. It might destroy him, it could go either way, I know that really but I want to hope that it will do him some good.