Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Ever Get The Feeling That You're Never All Alone?
A week washed by. New happy faces, new scared faces, new dead faces. I’d get up, be ignored, watch some murder (It had gotten to the point where it was like watching a mildly interesting TV show), whilst being ignored, go to bed, be ignored by Mikey; who had failed to find himself a new room still, wake up and be ignored!
I was still a prisoner. For a few short days I had been convinced (Or distracted) otherwise. But it was redawning. I was a prisoner again.
And then one day, I heard something interesting.
“She really is just a dead weight, man.” Ray.
“Naw, we can’t. Gerard is still obsessed with her and all.” Bob.
“Yeah, but he’s not gonna talk to her. She does nothing. I say we do it while he’s out, and say she ran off.” Frank.
“He wouldn’t believe that. She wouldn’t run off.” Mikey.
“He just… He never does anything. This is all your f… Adrienne, I can see you.” Ah. I stepped into the den, where they were seated around the table, playing poker in a cloud of smoke. “So…” I said casually, as though I had not just overheard them plotting my death. Mikey rolled his eyes. He had purposely avoided me for 7 days. That was talented of him, I don’t think I could avoid someone I slept within a metre of every night. I stole a glance at myself in the mirror hanging on the wall opposite. My hair, not washed or brushed, was in a loose ponytail, my bangs falling in my face. I had dark circles under my eyes and was gradually getting paler due to my not being allowed to go outside. I was losing weight and no longer bothered to dress ‘presentably’ as Gerard had put it. “How much did you hear?” growled Bob. I looked back at them and said bluntly “All of it.” Bob exchanged glances with the others and then said gruffly “Well, then, that saves a lot of hassle.” Strangely, I wasn’t really upset. I mean, I was upset, but not as much as I thought I would be. I nodded slowly and turned. “Well, that’s unless you want to strike a deal with us.” The speaker was Mikey. I turned back and faced the guys, who were giving Mikey worried looks. Apparently they had been satisfied with the concept of killing me. “Yes?” I said, a glimmer of hope rising in my mind. Mikey had to still care for me a little. Enough to keep me alive. “Well, boys, the question is, who’s the bigger problem, Adrienne here, or Dear Old Gee.” Bob raised his eyebrows, and Ray looked confused. “Adrienne just sits in her room, is quiet, can cook, clean, and could prove useful for many things. Gerard, however, is an asshole when provoked in one of his moods, is slowly falling into depressive alcoholism, and thinks he’s king shit of everything. Get my drift?” Frankie nodded slowly. “And while none of us have the skill it takes to do away with a problem like this, I know someone who fits the criteria perfectly.” They all looked at me. I felt sick. “Me? Kill Gerard?” Ray nodded. “He doesn’t trust us. He knows we’d turn on him in a second…” He was still talking, but I wasn’t listening. Panic rose inside me. If they wanted me to do it, I had to. Knowing this, I shook my head wildly and backed away. “Please… Don’t do this, give him another chance. Give me a week, I can fix him.” They looked at each other, and then four heads nodded. “A week.” Said Frank. “If you are unsuccessful, then you kill him. And then, my pretty, we kill you.” Tears swam around in my eyes as I shook their hands each in turn, seemingly making a deal with four malicious devils. I retired to Gerard’s room, where I would wait. After the events of the week before, I never thought I would go back to Gerard. He, who I had just begun to trust. I let my guard down for a second and got hurt.
I waited for hours, until the sky was dark and there was no sun shining through the shutters and bars that kept me from the outside world. I waited, and then he came. I half expected him to just turn and walk out, when he saw me, sitting with my knees held up under my chin, apprehension all too obvious. He didn’t. He just stood, looking surprised. “Gerard.” I said calmly. He nodded. “Gerard, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel hurt. I truly didn’t know you felt that way about my friendship with Mikey.” I looked down and bit back the scream for justice burning between my lips. He slowly nodded, and walked out. Before he did, I cried out “Gerard! You said you’d look after me. Me having a good friendship with your brother is a small price to pay. At least you have family left. Don’t you care about me anymore?” He turned to look at me, pain painted clearly in his eyes, and said “Yes, I do.” And then walked out. I stifled what would have been a hysterical screech and trudged back to my room, and flung myself to the bed.
Calm down, you’ve got a week. My mind said comfortingly. I ignored it and mulled over my situation pessimistically. I did this a lot. I had noticed a disturbing change in Mikey. He had been my sweet, shy saviour, and my one salvation from Gerard’s violent mood swings. But now, my soft spoken prince had become like Gerard himself. I swallowed a loud sob, for I was alone.
The next day everyone went out except Mikey. I knew that meant they were “Picking Up.” This usually happened at bars, so Mikey wasn’t allowed. Keeping in mind my deal with the guys, I decided to talk to him. I knew I shouldn’t, and that I should stay away from him, but I loved him in a different way than I loved Gerard. Mikey was safe. Mikey felt like home. I walked into my room, where he was sitting on his little bed, reading. “Mikey?” I said tentatively. He looked up at me with annoyance in his eyes. “Yes?” He said it venomously, making it all too clear he didn’t want me anywhere near him. I turned away to conceal the sting of tears. “Don’t worry.” I whispered, walking out slowly. My only friend was no longer. I walked down the hall, down the stairs, and sat in the kitchen, staring blankly out the window to the picturesque mountains. All the windows had bars instead of boards now, and I liked it. I like sunshine. I used to live in it. I used to live in the world, but now I could only watch it through bars. I continued to look out until I heard the van pull up out the front, and then I stood up and waited with mild apprehension. I didn’t really care who or what they brought in with them. I guess it didn’t really matter anyway. Nothing did.
Sorry, its getting whingy. Something interesting will happen... Soon.
:DDDDD
xxEC
I was still a prisoner. For a few short days I had been convinced (Or distracted) otherwise. But it was redawning. I was a prisoner again.
And then one day, I heard something interesting.
“She really is just a dead weight, man.” Ray.
“Naw, we can’t. Gerard is still obsessed with her and all.” Bob.
“Yeah, but he’s not gonna talk to her. She does nothing. I say we do it while he’s out, and say she ran off.” Frank.
“He wouldn’t believe that. She wouldn’t run off.” Mikey.
“He just… He never does anything. This is all your f… Adrienne, I can see you.” Ah. I stepped into the den, where they were seated around the table, playing poker in a cloud of smoke. “So…” I said casually, as though I had not just overheard them plotting my death. Mikey rolled his eyes. He had purposely avoided me for 7 days. That was talented of him, I don’t think I could avoid someone I slept within a metre of every night. I stole a glance at myself in the mirror hanging on the wall opposite. My hair, not washed or brushed, was in a loose ponytail, my bangs falling in my face. I had dark circles under my eyes and was gradually getting paler due to my not being allowed to go outside. I was losing weight and no longer bothered to dress ‘presentably’ as Gerard had put it. “How much did you hear?” growled Bob. I looked back at them and said bluntly “All of it.” Bob exchanged glances with the others and then said gruffly “Well, then, that saves a lot of hassle.” Strangely, I wasn’t really upset. I mean, I was upset, but not as much as I thought I would be. I nodded slowly and turned. “Well, that’s unless you want to strike a deal with us.” The speaker was Mikey. I turned back and faced the guys, who were giving Mikey worried looks. Apparently they had been satisfied with the concept of killing me. “Yes?” I said, a glimmer of hope rising in my mind. Mikey had to still care for me a little. Enough to keep me alive. “Well, boys, the question is, who’s the bigger problem, Adrienne here, or Dear Old Gee.” Bob raised his eyebrows, and Ray looked confused. “Adrienne just sits in her room, is quiet, can cook, clean, and could prove useful for many things. Gerard, however, is an asshole when provoked in one of his moods, is slowly falling into depressive alcoholism, and thinks he’s king shit of everything. Get my drift?” Frankie nodded slowly. “And while none of us have the skill it takes to do away with a problem like this, I know someone who fits the criteria perfectly.” They all looked at me. I felt sick. “Me? Kill Gerard?” Ray nodded. “He doesn’t trust us. He knows we’d turn on him in a second…” He was still talking, but I wasn’t listening. Panic rose inside me. If they wanted me to do it, I had to. Knowing this, I shook my head wildly and backed away. “Please… Don’t do this, give him another chance. Give me a week, I can fix him.” They looked at each other, and then four heads nodded. “A week.” Said Frank. “If you are unsuccessful, then you kill him. And then, my pretty, we kill you.” Tears swam around in my eyes as I shook their hands each in turn, seemingly making a deal with four malicious devils. I retired to Gerard’s room, where I would wait. After the events of the week before, I never thought I would go back to Gerard. He, who I had just begun to trust. I let my guard down for a second and got hurt.
I waited for hours, until the sky was dark and there was no sun shining through the shutters and bars that kept me from the outside world. I waited, and then he came. I half expected him to just turn and walk out, when he saw me, sitting with my knees held up under my chin, apprehension all too obvious. He didn’t. He just stood, looking surprised. “Gerard.” I said calmly. He nodded. “Gerard, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel hurt. I truly didn’t know you felt that way about my friendship with Mikey.” I looked down and bit back the scream for justice burning between my lips. He slowly nodded, and walked out. Before he did, I cried out “Gerard! You said you’d look after me. Me having a good friendship with your brother is a small price to pay. At least you have family left. Don’t you care about me anymore?” He turned to look at me, pain painted clearly in his eyes, and said “Yes, I do.” And then walked out. I stifled what would have been a hysterical screech and trudged back to my room, and flung myself to the bed.
Calm down, you’ve got a week. My mind said comfortingly. I ignored it and mulled over my situation pessimistically. I did this a lot. I had noticed a disturbing change in Mikey. He had been my sweet, shy saviour, and my one salvation from Gerard’s violent mood swings. But now, my soft spoken prince had become like Gerard himself. I swallowed a loud sob, for I was alone.
The next day everyone went out except Mikey. I knew that meant they were “Picking Up.” This usually happened at bars, so Mikey wasn’t allowed. Keeping in mind my deal with the guys, I decided to talk to him. I knew I shouldn’t, and that I should stay away from him, but I loved him in a different way than I loved Gerard. Mikey was safe. Mikey felt like home. I walked into my room, where he was sitting on his little bed, reading. “Mikey?” I said tentatively. He looked up at me with annoyance in his eyes. “Yes?” He said it venomously, making it all too clear he didn’t want me anywhere near him. I turned away to conceal the sting of tears. “Don’t worry.” I whispered, walking out slowly. My only friend was no longer. I walked down the hall, down the stairs, and sat in the kitchen, staring blankly out the window to the picturesque mountains. All the windows had bars instead of boards now, and I liked it. I like sunshine. I used to live in it. I used to live in the world, but now I could only watch it through bars. I continued to look out until I heard the van pull up out the front, and then I stood up and waited with mild apprehension. I didn’t really care who or what they brought in with them. I guess it didn’t really matter anyway. Nothing did.
Sorry, its getting whingy. Something interesting will happen... Soon.
:DDDDD
xxEC
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