Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Soul Purpose
27. Jam Session
Gerard stared blankly at the wall in front of him.
“I asked whether you’re involved with the lead singer of Soul Purpose or not.” Brian’s voice buzzed from the phone he was holding absently.
The singer blinked slowly, his sleep deprived mind wakening with the first stirrings of the anxiety hormone.
“Uhmmmm… Where did you g-get t-that idea?” he asked, biting the sides of his fingernails.
A sigh came from the other hand, immediately accompanied by the rather tired-sounding voice of his manager.
“I follow the news about you guys. Manager, remember? It’s in the job description…”
“What – what news?” he asked, shocked.
“Does it really matter, Gerard? I just wanna learn the truth. Is this another gossip we should blow sky-high or just ignore, or is it actually true?” He sounded really tired.
Gerard sat upright in his bed, frowning. He glanced at the other bed a few feet from him, in which his brother was still sleeping peacefully. He watched the steady rise and fall of Mikey’s chest as he thought of something to say.
“Brian, I. I just –”
“It’s true, isn’t it?” Another sigh.
The singer blinked hysterically, his eyes glazed over.
“What if it is true?” he asked in a hard tone, challenging.
He could almost feel the headshake his manager was giving at the other end of the phone. He was probably massaging the bridge of his nose, too.
“There are no ‘what if’s here, Gerard… It’s true, isn’t it?”
The front man gave an exasperated sigh which he completed with a shrug, though Brian couldn’t see the motion so it really wasn’t any help for emotional emphasis.
“Yes.” he admitted finally.
“Okay.” stated his manager solely.
Silence fell over the phone line. Neither man talked, stretching out the long tense silence.
“May I ask why you felt the need to openly make out with her in the middle of an amusement park?” Brian exploded in the end, impatiently. “In fucking Six Flags?”
“Well, you tend to kiss your girlfriend every now and then.” muttered Gerard with an edge of angry sarcasm.
“Don’t be smart… If you don’t wanna be caught by the paparazzi, you don’t give them anything to pounce and chew on. You already know that, Gerard –”
“I know! I just… wasn’t thinking…”
“You’ve had girlfriends, before. I thought you liked to keep your personal life to yourself as much as possible. What has changed?”
Gerard continued to study his sleeping brother. He looked so peaceful, so together. What he wouldn’t give to have been sleeping like that himself, still.
“Nothing.” he breathed. “Nothing has changed. I just… I was careless, reckless even… I dunno…”
Brain sighed, yet again.
“I just wish you hadn’t been so careless. I mean, clearly, neither of you gave a fucking damn about the consequences and that means this is probably a really huge deal for both of yo –”
“It is.” Gerard cut him off quietly. “I’m in love with her.”
“Okay.” Brian said slowly. “Good for you. But, you guys should know that this is gonna have consequences. And they’re not gonna be pleasant –”
“What do you mean they’re not gonna be pleasant? It’s not even gossip. Once we admit our relationship, what else could they do?” the lead singer asked, panicking.
“Look, I know Defne enough to know that she cannot be that type of woman but people are gonna start talking… They’re gonna call her a fortune hunter –”
“Don’t say that about her! She is not a –” cried Gerard furiously but his manager cut him off.
“I already told you, I know!” he shouted over the phone, sounding pissed. “I’m just telling you what they’re gonna say. ‘Cause it’s nothing that has never happened before… And both of you are gonna end up hurt because of this. Her band will be pushed into the shadows while your relationship stays in the spotlight. And thousands of different ideas are gonna run around the internet and the magazines…” he trailed off.
“No.” Gerard mumbled to himself as he shook his head fierily, rejecting the notion all at once.
“And people are gonna ask ‘Wasn’t Gerard Way engaged to another woman only a few months ago and now suddenly he’s in love with her?’ What’re you gonna tell them?”
“Nothing.” he answered forcefully. “Look, Brian, I don’t want any of that shit to happen. But if it’s coming our way nonetheless, then we’ll cope, okay? But I don’t wanna lie to people and say that there’s nothing going on between us. ‘Cause we’ve got this whole point about sincerity, you know? I try really hard not to lie about anything. And of course, then I’d have to keep her my dirty little secret or something. I don’t want that. ‘Cause… I feel, like… th-this is di-different, this t-time.”
Finally, Brian admitted defeat.
“Whatever, okay. You just… talk to her or something, all right?” he asked.
Gerard nodded even if his manager couldn’t see it.
“Yeah, I will.” he added.
“Okay.”
“Hey Brian?” he asked casually.
“Yeah?”
“I’m sorry I managed to make you mad at me again.” the singer muttered.
Brian gave a dry chuckle.
“I’m not mad at you, Gerard. I’m just worried’s all.”
----------------
Defne was strumming a random 12 bar blues chord progression, her right hand keeping an enjoyable blues rhythm as she tapped her foot to the beat. Zack sat right across from her seat in the little studio of the tour bus, improvising an energetic solo to her accompanying chords.
She grinned at her friend as she flicked her wrist, twisting the rhythm cleverly, adding tiny melody pieces here and there to dress up the tune. The blonde guitarist asked a question, playing a striking ascending melody with a tilt in the end. And then he answered his own question with another, this time descending, melody.
“Pam pam, pam pam, pam paa – pam pam” the singer started chanting after a while, trying to come up with an imaginary accompanying bass tune.
“Am I hearing right?” someone asked from the door in a mock-surprised voice. “Is that really a blues tune?
They both turned to glance at the newcomer. It was Frank with a large grin plastered on his face.
Defne stopped making her bass tunes to talk to the tiny guitarist.
“Hey, come on in Frank! Let’s jam!” she hollered.
Frank’s shapely brows rose higher as a little escaped his pinkish lips.
“Just let me go fetch the heavy gunners!” he yelled before turning to run down the hallway to the front-lounge.
Minutes later, he emerged with Ray and Bob, both of whom were looking pretty confused.
They crammed up in what little space there was in the small room and got all cozy with their instruments. Soon, Ray and Zack had passed into a parallel universe with their respective guitars and Bob was trying a little drum solo, careful not to go too hard on his wrists. They had been aching a lot, lately. But of course, he wouldn’t tell anyone about that. Stubborn drummer.
In the middle of all that jazz, Gerard stuck his head through the door, glancing around the over-crowded room. He gave a bunch of tight-lipped smiles to the people inside until he could catch Defne’s eyes.
She gave him a bright smile as she held his gaze. Then she noticed a few tensed up lines on his face. She raised her eye brows in query. What was wrong?
The front man gestured vaguely towards the back-lounge with his head as he looked at her with huge eyes.
She slowly rose from her seat, tucking her guitar safely in its case like a mother tucking her child in bed at night. She made her way to the little door of the room, taking care not to tip over anyone’s foot or anything and finally reached her destination.
She shut the door before looking up at the rather stressed-out looking singer before her. Now that she was closer, she could see that he was chewing nervously on his bottom lip. His pretty brows were furrowed as if he was deep in thought.
“Hey!” she greeted and continued tentatively “Is something wrong?”
Gerard stared at her questioning eyes. A few locks of rebellious bangs had fallen over her coal-rimmed dark orbs, the rest of her long thick hair was put up in a messy bun on top of her head. Sparkly dark strands were sticking out in every direction. She preferred putting her hair up when it got hot; she liked keeping the back of her neck cool. He stared at her as she searched his face for any sign of a response; she looked truly beautiful.
He didn’t want to pronounce the terribly cliché line “We need to talk”. And besides, nothing good ever came out of that line. So he tried to improvise.
“Uhmm… I, uhh, I ju-just… Brian called me this morning.” he blurted, taking her hand and leading her towards the back-lounge.
They sat down on the booth – or Gerard’s drawing table – and just stared at each other for a few more moments until Defne couldn’t stand it anymore. He was clearly not getting the whole “what about Brian?” look she was shooting at him. And she was very impatient.
“So, what about Brian? What did he have to say to you?” she asked lightly.
Gerard gave her another no-sparkly-teeth-showing-tight-lipped-nervous smile. And yet, he stilled managed to look adorable. The man had the face of an angel; there wasn’t much he could do about it.
“He, uhh. Yeah. There’s the thing. Basically, our little trip to Six Flags yesterday… Well, it turns out that we got spotted.”
“What?” she asked hastily, frowning.
“Ummmm. Brian kinda said that he saw pictures of us making out in the amusement park.” he muttered.
She blinked at him blankly.
“Where did he see them?” she asked.
“I don’t know. He just said that he keeps an eye on the news about the band. Actually, he asked me if I was in a relationship with you first thing…”
“Oh…”
“Yeah… I – I’m sorr –”
“Don’t be! It’s not your fault, okay? It takes two people to make out in public, after all.” she cut him off.
Gerard looked sheepish as he ducked his head to stare at his thighs.
Defne reached out and covered his hand with her own softly.
“So…” she began “What are we gonna do?”
“I dunno.” mumbled the front man, his eyes full of question marks. “But I’d rather not lie to people.”
She gave him a tight smile.
“Me neither… So, if anyone happens to ask, we just tell them we’re together, huh?”
He nodded.
“Yeah, basically.”
She stared off at the distance for a while and then muttered quietly.
“People are gonna talk.”
Gerard nodded again.
She crossed her arms crankily.
“But I don’t want them to. Gaaahhhh! Aaarrrggghh!” she cried all of a sudden, “I can’t even get mad at anyone! I can only blame myself for being careless. I hate blaming myself… I want to punch other people.”
Gerard raised an eyebrow at her wish. Then he presented his opinion tentatively.
“You know, we could always find out the person who took the photograph and then go beat him up.”
He had said all of that so sincerely that Defne had to laugh.
“Yeah. Now, that’s what I’d call a good idea!” she cheered.
The front man’s face wiped out of all humor suddenly. He leaned closer to her and stared deep into her dark eyes.
“Honestly, though, Defne. We can dodge the bullets they send our way. It’ll be hard. But we shouldn’t let them bring us down, right?”
She nodded in utter agreement.
“No matter what they’d say…” he trailed off.
She gave him a curious look, frowning slightly. She decided she didn’t want to think about what people were going to say. Then she leaned in and placed a tiny kiss at the edge of his mouth, to which he smiled and slipped an arm around her waist, drawing her closer to his body.
They sat there covered in the distant tunes and melodies coming from the studio.
“You know” started Gerard as an afterthought “We should probably tell the guys about us before some interviewer asks them if we keep them up all night or something.”
Defne blushed furiously at the thought and shot a scolding look at him before nodding her consent.
“They had to learn sometime, these days…”
----------------
Of course it wasn’t the most shocking news. So their band mates took it pretty well. With sincere congratulations. Tight hugs. Hard slaps on the back (ehem, Matt). And a seemingly endless trail of sniggers.
Mikey and Frank showered the couple with a few handfuls of Rice Krispies, simply because they didn’t have any rice in the bus. Later that night, the hyper guitarist and the silent bassist had to clean up the lounge floor, muttering and swearing under their breaths all the time.
No one questioned much.
Of course, they were friends.
A/N: Hey guys! This chapter’s probably one of the shortest chapters I’ve written in a while. But it’s not that I’m not motivated or anything. I am, I really am. I love you guys so much for reading/reviewing/rating. But it just felt like this one should end here, so… Sorry not much happens in this. I guess this is sort of a filler chapter. Every long story needs some every now and then, right?
Sooo, anyone worried for the sake of Gerard and Defne’s relationship? Tell me!
Review. And/or rate. Whichever feels fine. Please =) You’ve got no idea how happy it makes me to read and respond to reviews. And seeing green chapters is just… ahh!
< 33333333
Gerard stared blankly at the wall in front of him.
“I asked whether you’re involved with the lead singer of Soul Purpose or not.” Brian’s voice buzzed from the phone he was holding absently.
The singer blinked slowly, his sleep deprived mind wakening with the first stirrings of the anxiety hormone.
“Uhmmmm… Where did you g-get t-that idea?” he asked, biting the sides of his fingernails.
A sigh came from the other hand, immediately accompanied by the rather tired-sounding voice of his manager.
“I follow the news about you guys. Manager, remember? It’s in the job description…”
“What – what news?” he asked, shocked.
“Does it really matter, Gerard? I just wanna learn the truth. Is this another gossip we should blow sky-high or just ignore, or is it actually true?” He sounded really tired.
Gerard sat upright in his bed, frowning. He glanced at the other bed a few feet from him, in which his brother was still sleeping peacefully. He watched the steady rise and fall of Mikey’s chest as he thought of something to say.
“Brian, I. I just –”
“It’s true, isn’t it?” Another sigh.
The singer blinked hysterically, his eyes glazed over.
“What if it is true?” he asked in a hard tone, challenging.
He could almost feel the headshake his manager was giving at the other end of the phone. He was probably massaging the bridge of his nose, too.
“There are no ‘what if’s here, Gerard… It’s true, isn’t it?”
The front man gave an exasperated sigh which he completed with a shrug, though Brian couldn’t see the motion so it really wasn’t any help for emotional emphasis.
“Yes.” he admitted finally.
“Okay.” stated his manager solely.
Silence fell over the phone line. Neither man talked, stretching out the long tense silence.
“May I ask why you felt the need to openly make out with her in the middle of an amusement park?” Brian exploded in the end, impatiently. “In fucking Six Flags?”
“Well, you tend to kiss your girlfriend every now and then.” muttered Gerard with an edge of angry sarcasm.
“Don’t be smart… If you don’t wanna be caught by the paparazzi, you don’t give them anything to pounce and chew on. You already know that, Gerard –”
“I know! I just… wasn’t thinking…”
“You’ve had girlfriends, before. I thought you liked to keep your personal life to yourself as much as possible. What has changed?”
Gerard continued to study his sleeping brother. He looked so peaceful, so together. What he wouldn’t give to have been sleeping like that himself, still.
“Nothing.” he breathed. “Nothing has changed. I just… I was careless, reckless even… I dunno…”
Brain sighed, yet again.
“I just wish you hadn’t been so careless. I mean, clearly, neither of you gave a fucking damn about the consequences and that means this is probably a really huge deal for both of yo –”
“It is.” Gerard cut him off quietly. “I’m in love with her.”
“Okay.” Brian said slowly. “Good for you. But, you guys should know that this is gonna have consequences. And they’re not gonna be pleasant –”
“What do you mean they’re not gonna be pleasant? It’s not even gossip. Once we admit our relationship, what else could they do?” the lead singer asked, panicking.
“Look, I know Defne enough to know that she cannot be that type of woman but people are gonna start talking… They’re gonna call her a fortune hunter –”
“Don’t say that about her! She is not a –” cried Gerard furiously but his manager cut him off.
“I already told you, I know!” he shouted over the phone, sounding pissed. “I’m just telling you what they’re gonna say. ‘Cause it’s nothing that has never happened before… And both of you are gonna end up hurt because of this. Her band will be pushed into the shadows while your relationship stays in the spotlight. And thousands of different ideas are gonna run around the internet and the magazines…” he trailed off.
“No.” Gerard mumbled to himself as he shook his head fierily, rejecting the notion all at once.
“And people are gonna ask ‘Wasn’t Gerard Way engaged to another woman only a few months ago and now suddenly he’s in love with her?’ What’re you gonna tell them?”
“Nothing.” he answered forcefully. “Look, Brian, I don’t want any of that shit to happen. But if it’s coming our way nonetheless, then we’ll cope, okay? But I don’t wanna lie to people and say that there’s nothing going on between us. ‘Cause we’ve got this whole point about sincerity, you know? I try really hard not to lie about anything. And of course, then I’d have to keep her my dirty little secret or something. I don’t want that. ‘Cause… I feel, like… th-this is di-different, this t-time.”
Finally, Brian admitted defeat.
“Whatever, okay. You just… talk to her or something, all right?” he asked.
Gerard nodded even if his manager couldn’t see it.
“Yeah, I will.” he added.
“Okay.”
“Hey Brian?” he asked casually.
“Yeah?”
“I’m sorry I managed to make you mad at me again.” the singer muttered.
Brian gave a dry chuckle.
“I’m not mad at you, Gerard. I’m just worried’s all.”
----------------
Defne was strumming a random 12 bar blues chord progression, her right hand keeping an enjoyable blues rhythm as she tapped her foot to the beat. Zack sat right across from her seat in the little studio of the tour bus, improvising an energetic solo to her accompanying chords.
She grinned at her friend as she flicked her wrist, twisting the rhythm cleverly, adding tiny melody pieces here and there to dress up the tune. The blonde guitarist asked a question, playing a striking ascending melody with a tilt in the end. And then he answered his own question with another, this time descending, melody.
“Pam pam, pam pam, pam paa – pam pam” the singer started chanting after a while, trying to come up with an imaginary accompanying bass tune.
“Am I hearing right?” someone asked from the door in a mock-surprised voice. “Is that really a blues tune?
They both turned to glance at the newcomer. It was Frank with a large grin plastered on his face.
Defne stopped making her bass tunes to talk to the tiny guitarist.
“Hey, come on in Frank! Let’s jam!” she hollered.
Frank’s shapely brows rose higher as a little escaped his pinkish lips.
“Just let me go fetch the heavy gunners!” he yelled before turning to run down the hallway to the front-lounge.
Minutes later, he emerged with Ray and Bob, both of whom were looking pretty confused.
They crammed up in what little space there was in the small room and got all cozy with their instruments. Soon, Ray and Zack had passed into a parallel universe with their respective guitars and Bob was trying a little drum solo, careful not to go too hard on his wrists. They had been aching a lot, lately. But of course, he wouldn’t tell anyone about that. Stubborn drummer.
In the middle of all that jazz, Gerard stuck his head through the door, glancing around the over-crowded room. He gave a bunch of tight-lipped smiles to the people inside until he could catch Defne’s eyes.
She gave him a bright smile as she held his gaze. Then she noticed a few tensed up lines on his face. She raised her eye brows in query. What was wrong?
The front man gestured vaguely towards the back-lounge with his head as he looked at her with huge eyes.
She slowly rose from her seat, tucking her guitar safely in its case like a mother tucking her child in bed at night. She made her way to the little door of the room, taking care not to tip over anyone’s foot or anything and finally reached her destination.
She shut the door before looking up at the rather stressed-out looking singer before her. Now that she was closer, she could see that he was chewing nervously on his bottom lip. His pretty brows were furrowed as if he was deep in thought.
“Hey!” she greeted and continued tentatively “Is something wrong?”
Gerard stared at her questioning eyes. A few locks of rebellious bangs had fallen over her coal-rimmed dark orbs, the rest of her long thick hair was put up in a messy bun on top of her head. Sparkly dark strands were sticking out in every direction. She preferred putting her hair up when it got hot; she liked keeping the back of her neck cool. He stared at her as she searched his face for any sign of a response; she looked truly beautiful.
He didn’t want to pronounce the terribly cliché line “We need to talk”. And besides, nothing good ever came out of that line. So he tried to improvise.
“Uhmm… I, uhh, I ju-just… Brian called me this morning.” he blurted, taking her hand and leading her towards the back-lounge.
They sat down on the booth – or Gerard’s drawing table – and just stared at each other for a few more moments until Defne couldn’t stand it anymore. He was clearly not getting the whole “what about Brian?” look she was shooting at him. And she was very impatient.
“So, what about Brian? What did he have to say to you?” she asked lightly.
Gerard gave her another no-sparkly-teeth-showing-tight-lipped-nervous smile. And yet, he stilled managed to look adorable. The man had the face of an angel; there wasn’t much he could do about it.
“He, uhh. Yeah. There’s the thing. Basically, our little trip to Six Flags yesterday… Well, it turns out that we got spotted.”
“What?” she asked hastily, frowning.
“Ummmm. Brian kinda said that he saw pictures of us making out in the amusement park.” he muttered.
She blinked at him blankly.
“Where did he see them?” she asked.
“I don’t know. He just said that he keeps an eye on the news about the band. Actually, he asked me if I was in a relationship with you first thing…”
“Oh…”
“Yeah… I – I’m sorr –”
“Don’t be! It’s not your fault, okay? It takes two people to make out in public, after all.” she cut him off.
Gerard looked sheepish as he ducked his head to stare at his thighs.
Defne reached out and covered his hand with her own softly.
“So…” she began “What are we gonna do?”
“I dunno.” mumbled the front man, his eyes full of question marks. “But I’d rather not lie to people.”
She gave him a tight smile.
“Me neither… So, if anyone happens to ask, we just tell them we’re together, huh?”
He nodded.
“Yeah, basically.”
She stared off at the distance for a while and then muttered quietly.
“People are gonna talk.”
Gerard nodded again.
She crossed her arms crankily.
“But I don’t want them to. Gaaahhhh! Aaarrrggghh!” she cried all of a sudden, “I can’t even get mad at anyone! I can only blame myself for being careless. I hate blaming myself… I want to punch other people.”
Gerard raised an eyebrow at her wish. Then he presented his opinion tentatively.
“You know, we could always find out the person who took the photograph and then go beat him up.”
He had said all of that so sincerely that Defne had to laugh.
“Yeah. Now, that’s what I’d call a good idea!” she cheered.
The front man’s face wiped out of all humor suddenly. He leaned closer to her and stared deep into her dark eyes.
“Honestly, though, Defne. We can dodge the bullets they send our way. It’ll be hard. But we shouldn’t let them bring us down, right?”
She nodded in utter agreement.
“No matter what they’d say…” he trailed off.
She gave him a curious look, frowning slightly. She decided she didn’t want to think about what people were going to say. Then she leaned in and placed a tiny kiss at the edge of his mouth, to which he smiled and slipped an arm around her waist, drawing her closer to his body.
They sat there covered in the distant tunes and melodies coming from the studio.
“You know” started Gerard as an afterthought “We should probably tell the guys about us before some interviewer asks them if we keep them up all night or something.”
Defne blushed furiously at the thought and shot a scolding look at him before nodding her consent.
“They had to learn sometime, these days…”
----------------
Of course it wasn’t the most shocking news. So their band mates took it pretty well. With sincere congratulations. Tight hugs. Hard slaps on the back (ehem, Matt). And a seemingly endless trail of sniggers.
Mikey and Frank showered the couple with a few handfuls of Rice Krispies, simply because they didn’t have any rice in the bus. Later that night, the hyper guitarist and the silent bassist had to clean up the lounge floor, muttering and swearing under their breaths all the time.
No one questioned much.
Of course, they were friends.
A/N: Hey guys! This chapter’s probably one of the shortest chapters I’ve written in a while. But it’s not that I’m not motivated or anything. I am, I really am. I love you guys so much for reading/reviewing/rating. But it just felt like this one should end here, so… Sorry not much happens in this. I guess this is sort of a filler chapter. Every long story needs some every now and then, right?
Sooo, anyone worried for the sake of Gerard and Defne’s relationship? Tell me!
Review. And/or rate. Whichever feels fine. Please =) You’ve got no idea how happy it makes me to read and respond to reviews. And seeing green chapters is just… ahh!
< 33333333
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