Categories > Anime/Manga > Naruto > Sugar and Tomato Juice
Kanojo ga ore no kanaii da.
She's my wife.
Oh yeah. The entire world knew pretty well that your cooking relatively sucked. But not the people in Konoha. Well, not Kakashi more than anyone, since you'd told pretty much everything to Tsunade(she'd questionned you about what you could and COULDN'T do). In fact, you were planning on maybe getting a job at Ichiraku... But hey, you knew you were doomed now. The old man that runs the place doesn't hire people who don't know food. And you might like how it tastes, but you SURE AS HELL didn't know anything else about it.
So much for a fun job.
You sighed heavily as you let your head drop, ignoring the sizzle of the bacon in the pan for a few seconds, before, of course, remembering that you had to keep everyone alive and NOT burn the complex down. Then came the 'shlink' of the toaster and the sizzling of the eggs, too. Damn, so many fricken things at the same time! Yeah, no wonder you never cooked. The most simple breakfast was a pain in the ass for you, imagine STEAK. And cooking a flimsy steak is easy compared to what your mom used to do. And your brother. And your dad...
You sighed again. Would you ever be able to go home? Egh, maybe... Well, you HOPE. You sure as hell weren't planning on staying in Konoha forever.. Then again, how the hell would you get back? You wondered if there really WAS a clan with that special kekkei genkai, like the facfics said, that have the ability to switch dimensions.
...Whishful thinking, most likely.
"You should pay more attention to what you're doing, Yuuko-san." A voice whispered behind you, an arm tunring off the stove, reaching over your shoulder. And you nearly hit the person who had spoken with the pan of bacon. Before you realised that if you did that, all the bacon you'd worked so hard on cooking would be perfectly ruined.
"Damn you and your sneakiness! Tell me when you plan on giving me a heart attack.." You grumbled, shoving the jounin away and whipping out to plates and forks(you had studied the kitchen before you started cooking, just so youknow where everything is not to look like a coplete idiot). After garnishing said plates, you shoved one in Kakashi's hands and flopped dow on one of the chairs around the table.
"If you die of food poisoning, it's not me, it's the food." You warned, hungrily forking the food. Hey, can anyone BLAME you? How long has it been since you last ate, anyways?
Your stomach grumbled atthe thought. HM. You had skipped supper yesterday because you had slept though(and that evil Kakashi hadn't woken you up, argh), and hadn't bothered eating anything thinking you'd wake up at like, two in the morning to get something to eat. Well yeah, so much for that. Stupid brain woke you up at six instead. EIGHTEEN HOURS without eating. Craaaap. The most time you'd spent without food was like, six hours, at most. Man, you'd have to get used to this...
And then there was a knock on the door. Kakashi motionned to get up and answer, though you just shoved him back in his chair and went to the door yourself. Besides, it was probably just Shizune, right? Like you cared if SHE saw you in Kakashi's appart-
"...You're not Shizune."
"...You're not Kakashi..."
It took you a few seconds to register who was at the door, and an other few seconds to take in the fact that you were only in a silk nightgown and bathrobe. The hair at the back of your neck stood straight as you slammed the door shut, hearing the man(otherwise known as Genma) call 'oneesan!' behind it.
"K-Kakashi, whatever he asks, say it was an illusion. Something. Make up a creative excuse. Onegai shimasu?" You pleaded, you back stuck to the door. Which you had obviously locked.
Kakashi quirked a brow at you, and you knew right then he was smirking. Oh, that JACKASS. After wiping off Sasuke's smirk(which you'd do SOME day, since that guy smirks WAY too much for your liking) and making Naruto realise how damn obsesed Hinata is with him, you'd bash in Kakashi's face. HELLS yeah.
Sighing, the elder jounin pushed himself out of his chair(and you were gawking at him, since his plate almost looked as though it was licked clean), and then you skimmered away, out of sight of anyone at the door. Otherwise known as IN THE BATHROOM.
You heard indistinct conversation, and heard a few words. But mostly Genma asking question after question after QUESTION about who the hell I was. And you heard Kakashi fiddle around for words a bit, and you knew he had gotten Genma's attention. So you sneaked out of the bathroom quietly and peeked your head ast the hall just a bit, enough to see the two men conversing.
"Well, you see... She's my, uh, estranged wife."
"WHAT THE FUCK?!" you screamed, falling face-first into the kitchen floor. And apparently, you weren't the ONLY one to have screamed that, since, not ONLY was Genma totally ignoring you, but he was pointing at you all the while gawking at Kakahsi.
"An ESTRANGED wife?! Oh, come ON! You never TOLD anyone?! How did you even marry a Hime like her?!" Oh, princess. He called you princess. Arrogant bastard. You scoffed and sat up on the floor, crossing your arms.
And that's when you fell Kakashi glare at you. If he wanted you to shut up, he could've said it plain and simple instead of glaring at you like he wanted to kill you.
"ESTRANGED isn't exactly the right word..." You grumbled, looking away. "Stupid drunk accident. Nothing happened. I'm forced to live with him because I can't pay off my own stuff and my house was burned down a while back. Happy?" you lied, glaring at Genma, who, in turn, could only stare and blink at you, then Kakashi.
"DRUNK ACCIDENT. Your house burned down. No money." Genma echoed, scratching the back of his neck. "Well, uh, yeah, anyways, Kakashi... Just wanted to stop by to tell you Sakura's working at the hospital today with Tsunade, so no trianing."
"Why isn't Okawa taking care of this?" you asked, slamming your hands over your mouth. "Uh, nevermind I said any-"
"On a mission. He said he'd be back in a few days..." Genma sighed, turning around, leaving and closing the door behind him.
"...Drunk marriage accident?" Kakashi asked in a curious tone, crouching in front of me.
"Sure as hell beats your lame estranged wife. Like anyone would eve so much as believe that." you shrugged, still looking away. Well, it WAS true..! Your story had a lot more credibility than his. How else would Kakashi wind up with an average-looking, non-kunoichi wife, eh? It made a lot more sense. Not to mention that you having your 'house burned down and not having any money to pay anything' made it easier to swallow the fact that you were living with mister anti-emotionnal.
"More important thing is..." Kakashi started again in a deeper tone, and you knew he was going to talk about Okawa. Hoh crap. "How do you know about our ANBU messengers when you'Re from an outside country...?"
Damn. You knew something like this was going to happen. Again. Damn, you REALLY have to learn to shut up before you seriously get killed...
Well, anyways. Point is, you know Okawa. VERY well. After all, YOU'RE the one who had created him. He was your character. YOUR OC. Tsunade's favorite, so you said. The one she always sends around to give random messages.
...Who also happened to be Hitaru's brother. Otherwise know as you, most of the time. But know... You wondered if HITARU, in turn, existed as well
"...I... Know someone from Thunder who knows a few people here." You lied, looking straight up into that coal eye. Well, LYING'S a big word. You knew Fye. Fye Kurokawa. Your OTHER OC. Who might also be living in Konoha at the moment, and who ALSO knew Hitaru.
"Form the Thunder country? You're from around there?" Kakashi asked, his visible brow raising considerably. But HA, I already knew what to answer to that one.
"I never said I was from around there. I just said I knew someone from Thunder. For all you know, I might be from a country you don't even know about yet, where this person just happened to stop by." You replied, looking away again.
Damn. All this lying was startign to get on your nerves. But crap, you didn't have a choice..! Tsunade said that your information should stay confidential... And that, if you were ever asked, you should lie about anything that wouldn't drive people to think you really WERE from an other world.
But then again, if someone didn't think it was weird that you fell from the sky half naked, well crap, they had a serious mental problem.
"And just what country would that be?" Kakashi tried again, for the second time in two days. Damn, lying and keeping stuff from him was harder and more painful than you thought...
"Confidential. Not allowed to say. Tsunade-sama's orders." You said in a monotone voice, letting your shoulders slump as you pushed yourself off the floor. "Shizune should be dropping by soon, so I'll be out for a good part of the day." You said shortly as you went back to yo-Kakashi's room, obviously to change into the clothes you had bought yesterday.
Your clothes were pretty simple, nothing too extravagant to get yourself noticed. Just a dark-blue V-cut tunic, a nice black sash, black pants that you roleld to your knees, bandages around your right knee and left ankle(articulation problems run in the family), and black sandals to top it off. But those ninja-like sandals. Like hell you were to wear high-heels..! You never wore them at home, why waer them in the palce where you DON'T need the,?!
You vaguely heard a knock at the door again, and what was unmistakably Shizune's voice. You smiled and rushed out of the room still barefooted, Greeting the older woman and taking the much-needed money with a bow and thanks beforeshe left.
"I don't a lot of women you are able to pull off something like that." Kakashi said, still sitting at the dinning room table. You figured he sat back in his chair after you came in.
"...Pull WHAT off? It's not like Shizune just did something ama-" you started, but found yourself interrupted by Kakashi.
"I'm not talking about Shizune, baka-chan." Kakashi smirked, slightly chuckling at you. "I was talking about the way you dress." He stated with a hidden smirk, and you silently fumed, but calmed down. Hey, you HAD just been complimented by the sexiest man alive.
"...Simple things for the simple and average girl, Kakashi-san!" You said cheerfully, before slipping into your sandals. "Ittekimasu!" You called, just before closing the door and bounding down the hallway, and reaching the outdoors. A day of shopping was EXACTLY what you needed to clear your mind a little. Heck, maybe it'd even soothe your homesickness a bit..! Hey, a girl can always hope, can't she?
----------------------------------------------------
"Maa, I guess this should be enough..." You sighed happily as you walked back to the appartment, having carefully taken large streets, and remembering the few striking things along the way to remember your way home. And you were thankful for that, otherwise you would've gotten SO lost amongst all the red roofs!
Seriously, Tsunade woulkd have to change a few things. Or maybe Naruto, if he became the next Hokage. They'd have to personnalize the buildings and make big sign here and there. People can get lost WAAAAAY too easily in this dump. Seriosuly. Like you! You weren't from aroudn the place, as seeing so many red roofs is... Dizzying, sometimes. You almost got lost once or twice, it it hadn't been for those noticable 'landbarks'.
Like the weird bush and the funny loking house.
"Tadaima!" I called throughout the house, heading towards Kakashi's room to drop the few bags I had and walking to the living room, where the silver-haired jounin was reading his book.
Well, in fact, he had fallen asleep on the thing, the bok covering his now uncovered Sharingan. You had the urge to just remove the shameful book from the wonderful scarred eye, but, again, you just sighed and told yourself you'd rather live healthy than have your arm crushed. But then again, this chance was just too tempting. You had passed out on it once, but twice..? Wasn't there a saying that goes a little like 'Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me'? Well, sure, it wasn't really the same thing, but... To heck with it, right?
You sat on the couch's armrest, looning over the jounin. Thought not a SINGLE thought ran through your mind exept "Do the contacts really look like the real thing?" Which brought up the Hyuuga topic. You'd have to find and harass Neji for him to stay around you long enough to observe his eyes carefully enough.
Slow was too slow for your non-patient self. And besides, if you were going to die, might as well make it quick and painless. So you pulled off the book, and noticed a pair of eyes boring straight through mine. Well CRAP. He was awake all along.
"...Why did you let me see it?" You asked i a suspicious tone, a little too wary of the outcome of this entire situation. You were SURE the perverted shinobi had some kind of a plan behind that stupid little mask of his... And it didn't feel good. At all.
"Because I felt like it." He said simply, and you scoffed, sitting back on the armrest. Like hell you'd believe that. It was too stupid, plain and easy.
"You never let anyone see it unless you're sure you're going to k...ill... them..." Well crap.
Kakashi chuckled a bit. But not that dark chuckle you usually hear in the movies when the victim suddenly realises what the mad guy's going to do to them. It was more like a 'wtf?' chuckled.. More like a laughter than aynthing. Okay, so maybe he WASN'T going to kill you. But still. A woman has her right to be suspicious.
"Or it might be a sign that I actually trust you enough to show it to you." He stated pleasantly, poking my nose as he sat back up.
"...I find that hard to believe coming from a perverted idiot."
"That's mean, Yuuko-chan."
"It's not mean, i-Wait. CHAN?"
And then he vanished with a poof, leaving a note behind.
'Dear yuuko-CHAN,
Leaving on a mission for two days. I'll be back in time for supper on wednesday,
Kakashi'
"...TEMEEEEE!!"
She's my wife.
Oh yeah. The entire world knew pretty well that your cooking relatively sucked. But not the people in Konoha. Well, not Kakashi more than anyone, since you'd told pretty much everything to Tsunade(she'd questionned you about what you could and COULDN'T do). In fact, you were planning on maybe getting a job at Ichiraku... But hey, you knew you were doomed now. The old man that runs the place doesn't hire people who don't know food. And you might like how it tastes, but you SURE AS HELL didn't know anything else about it.
So much for a fun job.
You sighed heavily as you let your head drop, ignoring the sizzle of the bacon in the pan for a few seconds, before, of course, remembering that you had to keep everyone alive and NOT burn the complex down. Then came the 'shlink' of the toaster and the sizzling of the eggs, too. Damn, so many fricken things at the same time! Yeah, no wonder you never cooked. The most simple breakfast was a pain in the ass for you, imagine STEAK. And cooking a flimsy steak is easy compared to what your mom used to do. And your brother. And your dad...
You sighed again. Would you ever be able to go home? Egh, maybe... Well, you HOPE. You sure as hell weren't planning on staying in Konoha forever.. Then again, how the hell would you get back? You wondered if there really WAS a clan with that special kekkei genkai, like the facfics said, that have the ability to switch dimensions.
...Whishful thinking, most likely.
"You should pay more attention to what you're doing, Yuuko-san." A voice whispered behind you, an arm tunring off the stove, reaching over your shoulder. And you nearly hit the person who had spoken with the pan of bacon. Before you realised that if you did that, all the bacon you'd worked so hard on cooking would be perfectly ruined.
"Damn you and your sneakiness! Tell me when you plan on giving me a heart attack.." You grumbled, shoving the jounin away and whipping out to plates and forks(you had studied the kitchen before you started cooking, just so youknow where everything is not to look like a coplete idiot). After garnishing said plates, you shoved one in Kakashi's hands and flopped dow on one of the chairs around the table.
"If you die of food poisoning, it's not me, it's the food." You warned, hungrily forking the food. Hey, can anyone BLAME you? How long has it been since you last ate, anyways?
Your stomach grumbled atthe thought. HM. You had skipped supper yesterday because you had slept though(and that evil Kakashi hadn't woken you up, argh), and hadn't bothered eating anything thinking you'd wake up at like, two in the morning to get something to eat. Well yeah, so much for that. Stupid brain woke you up at six instead. EIGHTEEN HOURS without eating. Craaaap. The most time you'd spent without food was like, six hours, at most. Man, you'd have to get used to this...
And then there was a knock on the door. Kakashi motionned to get up and answer, though you just shoved him back in his chair and went to the door yourself. Besides, it was probably just Shizune, right? Like you cared if SHE saw you in Kakashi's appart-
"...You're not Shizune."
"...You're not Kakashi..."
It took you a few seconds to register who was at the door, and an other few seconds to take in the fact that you were only in a silk nightgown and bathrobe. The hair at the back of your neck stood straight as you slammed the door shut, hearing the man(otherwise known as Genma) call 'oneesan!' behind it.
"K-Kakashi, whatever he asks, say it was an illusion. Something. Make up a creative excuse. Onegai shimasu?" You pleaded, you back stuck to the door. Which you had obviously locked.
Kakashi quirked a brow at you, and you knew right then he was smirking. Oh, that JACKASS. After wiping off Sasuke's smirk(which you'd do SOME day, since that guy smirks WAY too much for your liking) and making Naruto realise how damn obsesed Hinata is with him, you'd bash in Kakashi's face. HELLS yeah.
Sighing, the elder jounin pushed himself out of his chair(and you were gawking at him, since his plate almost looked as though it was licked clean), and then you skimmered away, out of sight of anyone at the door. Otherwise known as IN THE BATHROOM.
You heard indistinct conversation, and heard a few words. But mostly Genma asking question after question after QUESTION about who the hell I was. And you heard Kakashi fiddle around for words a bit, and you knew he had gotten Genma's attention. So you sneaked out of the bathroom quietly and peeked your head ast the hall just a bit, enough to see the two men conversing.
"Well, you see... She's my, uh, estranged wife."
"WHAT THE FUCK?!" you screamed, falling face-first into the kitchen floor. And apparently, you weren't the ONLY one to have screamed that, since, not ONLY was Genma totally ignoring you, but he was pointing at you all the while gawking at Kakahsi.
"An ESTRANGED wife?! Oh, come ON! You never TOLD anyone?! How did you even marry a Hime like her?!" Oh, princess. He called you princess. Arrogant bastard. You scoffed and sat up on the floor, crossing your arms.
And that's when you fell Kakashi glare at you. If he wanted you to shut up, he could've said it plain and simple instead of glaring at you like he wanted to kill you.
"ESTRANGED isn't exactly the right word..." You grumbled, looking away. "Stupid drunk accident. Nothing happened. I'm forced to live with him because I can't pay off my own stuff and my house was burned down a while back. Happy?" you lied, glaring at Genma, who, in turn, could only stare and blink at you, then Kakashi.
"DRUNK ACCIDENT. Your house burned down. No money." Genma echoed, scratching the back of his neck. "Well, uh, yeah, anyways, Kakashi... Just wanted to stop by to tell you Sakura's working at the hospital today with Tsunade, so no trianing."
"Why isn't Okawa taking care of this?" you asked, slamming your hands over your mouth. "Uh, nevermind I said any-"
"On a mission. He said he'd be back in a few days..." Genma sighed, turning around, leaving and closing the door behind him.
"...Drunk marriage accident?" Kakashi asked in a curious tone, crouching in front of me.
"Sure as hell beats your lame estranged wife. Like anyone would eve so much as believe that." you shrugged, still looking away. Well, it WAS true..! Your story had a lot more credibility than his. How else would Kakashi wind up with an average-looking, non-kunoichi wife, eh? It made a lot more sense. Not to mention that you having your 'house burned down and not having any money to pay anything' made it easier to swallow the fact that you were living with mister anti-emotionnal.
"More important thing is..." Kakashi started again in a deeper tone, and you knew he was going to talk about Okawa. Hoh crap. "How do you know about our ANBU messengers when you'Re from an outside country...?"
Damn. You knew something like this was going to happen. Again. Damn, you REALLY have to learn to shut up before you seriously get killed...
Well, anyways. Point is, you know Okawa. VERY well. After all, YOU'RE the one who had created him. He was your character. YOUR OC. Tsunade's favorite, so you said. The one she always sends around to give random messages.
...Who also happened to be Hitaru's brother. Otherwise know as you, most of the time. But know... You wondered if HITARU, in turn, existed as well
"...I... Know someone from Thunder who knows a few people here." You lied, looking straight up into that coal eye. Well, LYING'S a big word. You knew Fye. Fye Kurokawa. Your OTHER OC. Who might also be living in Konoha at the moment, and who ALSO knew Hitaru.
"Form the Thunder country? You're from around there?" Kakashi asked, his visible brow raising considerably. But HA, I already knew what to answer to that one.
"I never said I was from around there. I just said I knew someone from Thunder. For all you know, I might be from a country you don't even know about yet, where this person just happened to stop by." You replied, looking away again.
Damn. All this lying was startign to get on your nerves. But crap, you didn't have a choice..! Tsunade said that your information should stay confidential... And that, if you were ever asked, you should lie about anything that wouldn't drive people to think you really WERE from an other world.
But then again, if someone didn't think it was weird that you fell from the sky half naked, well crap, they had a serious mental problem.
"And just what country would that be?" Kakashi tried again, for the second time in two days. Damn, lying and keeping stuff from him was harder and more painful than you thought...
"Confidential. Not allowed to say. Tsunade-sama's orders." You said in a monotone voice, letting your shoulders slump as you pushed yourself off the floor. "Shizune should be dropping by soon, so I'll be out for a good part of the day." You said shortly as you went back to yo-Kakashi's room, obviously to change into the clothes you had bought yesterday.
Your clothes were pretty simple, nothing too extravagant to get yourself noticed. Just a dark-blue V-cut tunic, a nice black sash, black pants that you roleld to your knees, bandages around your right knee and left ankle(articulation problems run in the family), and black sandals to top it off. But those ninja-like sandals. Like hell you were to wear high-heels..! You never wore them at home, why waer them in the palce where you DON'T need the,?!
You vaguely heard a knock at the door again, and what was unmistakably Shizune's voice. You smiled and rushed out of the room still barefooted, Greeting the older woman and taking the much-needed money with a bow and thanks beforeshe left.
"I don't a lot of women you are able to pull off something like that." Kakashi said, still sitting at the dinning room table. You figured he sat back in his chair after you came in.
"...Pull WHAT off? It's not like Shizune just did something ama-" you started, but found yourself interrupted by Kakashi.
"I'm not talking about Shizune, baka-chan." Kakashi smirked, slightly chuckling at you. "I was talking about the way you dress." He stated with a hidden smirk, and you silently fumed, but calmed down. Hey, you HAD just been complimented by the sexiest man alive.
"...Simple things for the simple and average girl, Kakashi-san!" You said cheerfully, before slipping into your sandals. "Ittekimasu!" You called, just before closing the door and bounding down the hallway, and reaching the outdoors. A day of shopping was EXACTLY what you needed to clear your mind a little. Heck, maybe it'd even soothe your homesickness a bit..! Hey, a girl can always hope, can't she?
----------------------------------------------------
"Maa, I guess this should be enough..." You sighed happily as you walked back to the appartment, having carefully taken large streets, and remembering the few striking things along the way to remember your way home. And you were thankful for that, otherwise you would've gotten SO lost amongst all the red roofs!
Seriously, Tsunade woulkd have to change a few things. Or maybe Naruto, if he became the next Hokage. They'd have to personnalize the buildings and make big sign here and there. People can get lost WAAAAAY too easily in this dump. Seriosuly. Like you! You weren't from aroudn the place, as seeing so many red roofs is... Dizzying, sometimes. You almost got lost once or twice, it it hadn't been for those noticable 'landbarks'.
Like the weird bush and the funny loking house.
"Tadaima!" I called throughout the house, heading towards Kakashi's room to drop the few bags I had and walking to the living room, where the silver-haired jounin was reading his book.
Well, in fact, he had fallen asleep on the thing, the bok covering his now uncovered Sharingan. You had the urge to just remove the shameful book from the wonderful scarred eye, but, again, you just sighed and told yourself you'd rather live healthy than have your arm crushed. But then again, this chance was just too tempting. You had passed out on it once, but twice..? Wasn't there a saying that goes a little like 'Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me'? Well, sure, it wasn't really the same thing, but... To heck with it, right?
You sat on the couch's armrest, looning over the jounin. Thought not a SINGLE thought ran through your mind exept "Do the contacts really look like the real thing?" Which brought up the Hyuuga topic. You'd have to find and harass Neji for him to stay around you long enough to observe his eyes carefully enough.
Slow was too slow for your non-patient self. And besides, if you were going to die, might as well make it quick and painless. So you pulled off the book, and noticed a pair of eyes boring straight through mine. Well CRAP. He was awake all along.
"...Why did you let me see it?" You asked i a suspicious tone, a little too wary of the outcome of this entire situation. You were SURE the perverted shinobi had some kind of a plan behind that stupid little mask of his... And it didn't feel good. At all.
"Because I felt like it." He said simply, and you scoffed, sitting back on the armrest. Like hell you'd believe that. It was too stupid, plain and easy.
"You never let anyone see it unless you're sure you're going to k...ill... them..." Well crap.
Kakashi chuckled a bit. But not that dark chuckle you usually hear in the movies when the victim suddenly realises what the mad guy's going to do to them. It was more like a 'wtf?' chuckled.. More like a laughter than aynthing. Okay, so maybe he WASN'T going to kill you. But still. A woman has her right to be suspicious.
"Or it might be a sign that I actually trust you enough to show it to you." He stated pleasantly, poking my nose as he sat back up.
"...I find that hard to believe coming from a perverted idiot."
"That's mean, Yuuko-chan."
"It's not mean, i-Wait. CHAN?"
And then he vanished with a poof, leaving a note behind.
'Dear yuuko-CHAN,
Leaving on a mission for two days. I'll be back in time for supper on wednesday,
Kakashi'
"...TEMEEEEE!!"
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