Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Down the road, not across the street

The car crash hearts. (Ryan's song)

by grandtheftautumn 3 reviews

PENULTIMATE CHAPTER!!! ... deserves a title of its own. Very short but dw it's a good one =] ... And if you don't think so don't worry cause the finale will be awesome and lengthy.

Category: Panic! At The Disco - Rating: R - Genres: Drama - Warnings: [?] [V] - Published: 2007-07-20 - Updated: 2007-07-21 - 1066 words

1Exciting
Writer's Worries/Author's Notes:
This was a special chapter to me. I wrote this about two months ago, and I've been dying to post it. I loved it because it was musically inspired and I've written it to work with the music and vice versa. I've changed things since then and hoped that it still works just as good as the original version. If you don't play the song with this chapter you might as well not read it. And I mean it cause you'll be missing out. Well I think so anyway. I know some are thinking "Hey, if she needs music to make her writing better" or "she's a shit writer." It's not that at all and maybe some of you just don't understand.

ANYWAY... End of rant.
Go read =]

SONG for this chapter:


The Kill (Bury Me) - 30 Seconds to Mars


This might make your blood run cold.

*START PLAYING NOW! =]


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Chapter 25: The car crash hearts. (Ryan's song)


Ryan's POV



It was almost surreal as I watched my fellow pallbearers carry her casket out the church.

No other feeling. No pain. Only nothingness.

I glanced down the pews as I trailed at the back. Their gazes followed steadily as if in slow motion, the church suddenly became a sea of faceless people, nothing but a blur.

And there it was before me - the long black hearse. Its back door wide open as if laughing at me, mocking me, as it took the person I loved most in the world.

I felt dazed as I found myself at the burial. Feeling began to return, 100 times worse than I could imagine. It made her death feel more official. The ground was even crueler than that cynical hearse, as it swallowed Amara's casket, making her one with the earth.

Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust.

As the priest recited those age-old poetic and tragic words, I shook my head angrily in disbelief. I couldn't accept it.

I refused to believe it.

The next thing I knew I was throwing myself into the grave as I attempted to chase after her.


NO!!


I cried out, stirring myself from my own vivid nightmare. I recalled I was still at the hospital and realised had fallen asleep in the waiting room.


Holy fuck. That felt so real.


The horrible image of when I first found her relayed in my mind. Her body so still, her skin growing cold as ice. I then cried for the first time I could remember. I wept over Amara's body until the medics pried her from my arms and placed her inside the ambulance. They then rushed her to the hospital.

And there it was. Two in body bags, while Chastity was announced dead on arrival and Amara...

Amara was left fighting for her life and is now in a comatose state. The doctors said her condition was mild but gave no indication of when she would wake.

"She's a fighter," said one nurse.

The bullet had missed her heart and all other major organs, but her body had sustained a lot of physically abuse in such a short time that it's caused some major trauma.


I had my head clutched in my hands.

I need to get out of here. I can't stay here.

"I'm gonna head back to the house or whatever. Maybe get her some clothes. I'll see you guys later," I told Brendon.

Looking as if contemplating his next words carefully, he just nodded sympathetically.

I grabbed my car keys and headed out the door. I started driving with no particular destination in mind.

I stared out the windshield at the black road. Seeing nothing else but images of Amara.

Earlier memories filled my head. How breathtakingly beautiful she looked at the vampire party.

The same beautiful face that says those three little words and I can actually feel it in everything she does.

I chuckled almost sardonically at how long it took me to confess my feelings. How male thinking and pride and sheer blindness delayed the formation of our relationship.

Naturally, a small smile crept on my face at the memory of Amara when she first told me she loved me. It wasn't the best circumstances but I don't regret it.

A sudden pang filled my heart as I recalled the first time we made love. I could feel the same intensity, the same burning passion and love felt that night as I drove along the dark road. It hurt in the fact it had been less than a week ago and so much had changed within that time.

So much has changed in the last year. Conflicting emotions, last week felt like light years away, and last year felt almost as if it were yesterday. Days back home, safe in 'cosy' Summerlin, with nothing to harm us except razor blades and the occasionally school yard thug.

Right now I'd trade anything to have that back.

Pete entered my mind. Meeting him. Getting signed. The feeling of losing Amara to him and now I'm losing her all over again. My earlier nightmare replayed through my head. It scared me so much. It scared the hell out of me, the possibility of losing her that way. I don't know what I would do without her.

Ryan recalled their first honest kiss. The adrenaline from that night which had caused him to kiss Amara as a free man. He recalled the London city lights and the warm night air. Her beautiful smile and those deep green eyes ingrained into his inner lids.

Lost in his thoughts and memories Ryan didn't realise the sharp bend in the road.


C...R...A...S...H...


The sound of crunching metal filled the night sky.

It was as if the world slowed down as Ryan's car soared majestically over the side and plummeted downwards. The hood took a nosedive onto the grassy slope, picking up speed as it tumbled countless times down the hill.

Trapped, the lone occupant was continuously thrashed inside, until finally the roof collided into a weeping willow. There was a moment of silence, then a sudden...

eeeekkk

...as gravity pulled the rolled-over vehicle from its side position.

Inside an unconscious Ryan lay... arms draped over the steering wheel, blood gushing from his head.

Back at the hospital, the wavelength on Amara's ERG screen flat lined.




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So how'd I go?
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