Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > Fuck, Just Because You Can Have Everything, Doesn't Mean You Can Have Everything
My Bedroom Behavior Was Another Checkmark On Your Bedpost
3 reviewsEstella takes her pregnacy test with a heart beating only hopes.Hold your breath for the answer & be prepared for no or yes..... Oh & 5 tests!!:)
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Fuck, Just Because You Can Have Everything, Doesn't Mean You Can Have Everything
I looked at the fifth birth predictor. The little pink plus sign mocked me by looking like a plus. I was in distress! I was pregnant! I shouldn’t be fucking pregnant unless Trace didn’t use a fucking condom…..
I sprinted to the sex shit aisle. I had no idea what a condom looked like but now I knew and there wasn’t anything that resembled Trace’s “condom”. In fact, Trace hadn’t used a condom, just his penis not anything else.
I would be a seventeen year old mother in six months. Oh damn, would Pete and Ashlee be mad. What would Trace think?!
Nothing to do but wait three months tell them. Besides, what would three months do. Oh wait, don’t pregnant people get fat?!?! I need to tell Trace, Pete, William, Ashlee, Hailey, Vicky, Rachel, Mason, Sisky, and Gabe.
Oh my fucking shit, I’m fucking pregnant! How am I gonna tell everyone?!?!
Calm the fuck down, Estella, I can get through this. I repeated to myself.
I threw money at the cashier and ran to my house. It was so weird. Trace had used a condom. Hailey had sex four times, each time the guy wore a condom and she didn’t get pregnant which only brought me to the idea that Trace hadn’t used one. But why would he do that to me, knowing fairly well I’d get pregnant?
“Hey sweetheart,” Trace answered his cell.
“Hey sexy, can you meet me at the park?” I asked in my innocent I love you voice. I so didn’t love him as much anymore.
“Yeah, I’ll be right here.” Trace replied. That meant twenty minutes in Trace talk.
Trace was sitting against a tree. I leaned into his chest my entire body staying in him. We were just sitting there watching everyone around us. Trace was playing with my hair that wasn’t hidden today.
“Trace, baby, I’ve got some news.” I finally said.
My pride wasn’t anywhere near me. My guts weren’t talking. My happiness was disappearing in every word I thought of to say. I sucked in a breath.
“Well, you remember the sex last night. It was really great and all. I mean, I loved it! But I’m,” I turned to look him in the eyes but I couldn’t do it so I hid in his chest that was only covered by a light grey v-neck shirt, “pregnant.”
“Sexy, look at me.” He picked my head up out of his chest with his hands. “Don’t be ashamed. This thing always happens when people don’t use a condom. You’re seventeen you’ll figure this out.”
“Trace, you’re the dad. I was a virgin. This is your fucking kid.” I said clearly.
“I can’t take care of it! Estella, we’re over.” Trace hurried picked me up and dropped me back down. He rushed away faster than he picked up a guitar.
The world went slower after he said those two little words “we’re over”. How could two words like that change my life so much?
My heart was in more than two. I felt as if I didn’t have a heart I actually owned. My heart was Trace’s and I despised it for still loving him.
I picked myself up and dragged my feet to through the park.
Conversations went around me but I couldn’t hear them. People, dogs, Frisbees, and balls flew past me but I couldn’t see them. I couldn’t hear or see anything but all of last night’s events.
Nothing made since anymore. Nothing mattered. I felt dead but alive. I didn’t feel high anymore but I didn’t feel sober. I felt nothing. I felt no hate, no love, no compassion, no sadness, nothing at all for anyone. Everyone was the same. They may not look the same but inside everyone was trying to achieve the same thing. Knock up someone so they could dump them or kill their child on the inside because of gender.
I wasn’t mad at the world. I was mad at the people who lived on it.
I didn’t regret my first time. I didn’t regret who I did it with. I didn’t regret anything about it.
I regretted being born. I regretted my life. I hated myself for being so stupid.
I walked inside our house. Sisky and William were there. Their lips moved and I’m sure they were talking to me. I couldn’t hear it. The only words that I heard were Trace’s from last night, “I swear I won’t forget you. I’ll return your phone calls and still hang with you after the sex”. He hadn’t said anything about when I got knocked up just the sex. He had played by the rules but he didn’t fight fair. If he wanted to do this, we would do it. Nothing mattered anymore. I was dust in the wind. That’s all that mattered but this piece of dust was rising up.
“I’ll be in my room.” I muttered.
The two hadn’t heard me. My lips didn’t feel right moving.
“I’ll be in my room!” I screamed.
“What happened last night?” Sisky asked.
“I got knocked up by Trace but today he said it’s over because I got knocked up and now he doesn’t wanna date me.” I replied shrugging like it was the most common answer in the world.
“Oh.” Was all William said. His mouth was open in awe
“The fucker doesn’t fight fair so I’m not going to fight fair either.” I told him.
“Estella.” Sisky warned.
“Leave me the fuck alone.”
I was in pain. I didn’t want fucking revenge I wanted Trace back. The pain inside was running through me. Burning me with the flame that had started it.
I knew what our sex had been. It was another checkmark for Trace. It wasn’t important to him. Everything he had said last night was recycled from the last girl. Why waste new words on a new girl, right?! Wrong.
Every word was a lie. Every word was a regret for me. Every word was just a sweet nothing for the one he didn’t care about. The words were nothing. I was nothing. I wanna say I’m sucker for famous faces but that would be a lie. The truth, though hard to admit, I’m a sucker for Trace. I’m fucking blind for him.
He wasn’t worth crying for which was why I was here, lying on my face, my pillow was soaked with m salty tears. All I had to tell myself was he wasn’t worth the tears. He didn’t deserve them. Every time that ran through my head I knew I couldn’t stop crying.
I heard a garage door open. The front door slammed. The garage door reopened. Everything was quiet. I could hear my heart. I could hear my tears. I couldn’t feel them. I didn’t want to.
A baby was in my arms. She was perfect. She would have a perfect upcoming life. The only problem was she had a dad but he didn’t want her. He didn’t like her. He didn’t know her.
I put her down in her crib and went to answer the door.
“Hey Estella, get rid of the baby and you can have me back.” Trace smirked. He knew I would do anything for him. I loved him. My heart stopped and my mind stopped. All I did was listen and obey.
I picked up a knife. I opened the door to the baby’s room.
“Say goodbye.” I stabbed the knife through her. Blood squirted everywhere.
I ran back down to be enveloped in a hug by one true love. My first time.
He wasn’t there. All that was left was a head. It started talking as soon as I was in sight.
“That’ really sad. You’d kill your own baby to be with me. I can’t believe. We had everything. Don’t you get it, we’re over. That baby ruined us. Don’t even try to fix us. Just leave me. You just killed your baby.” The head disappeared.
I stood dumbfounded in the arch of my door. He was right.
I would do anything - like kill someone – for him. I was in horrible condition. His image was stuck in my eyes. His voice replayed in my mind. My heart fluttered at every thought for that guy.
I was horrible.
I woke startled and concerned. That dream was so real, so perfect. I knew for a fact I was trying to tell myself something. I’d gotten the message. I couldn’t not care though. That would be a waste of time.
I cared about it and that was obvious. Trace was done, I wasn’t. Nothing was the same. I knew it; everyone else that cared knew it. Trace didn’t obviously. He would be sorry though. Trace would be so sorry it wouldn’t be funny.
“Good morning daddy.” I faked a smile at him. “I’ve got some,” I shifted around my mind looking for the right word to call my pregnancy, “fascinating news, which I prefer you didn’t tell Ashlee.”
“Uh, yeah sure.” My dad replied sipping his coffee.
“I’m pregnant.” I muttered taking out my cereal box.
“What?” he asked putting down the newspaper onto the table.
“I’m pregnant, meaning I’m gonna have a baby.” I told him putting my cereal into the bowl.
“You’re what?” Pete roared angrily.
I had this odd feeling he had heard me this time. “I’m pregnant.”
“Are you positive?”
“I took the test five times.”
“Who’s the father?”
“Uh… Trace Cyrus.” I answered looking down at the blue china bowl.
“Your mother is gonna hear about this!” he exclaimed.
Well at least I got it out. I already knew Ashlee was going to give me a hard time but my dad; I couldn’t believe him. If she was on tour then he wouldn’t care this much.
Ashlee’s loud yawn was heard from the stairs. She came into the kitchen wearing her bright blue pajamas covered with cherries and a red tinted see through slip. She itched the messy bun her red hair was in.
“Good morning honey, good morning fuck face.” She gave Pete a peck on the lips and walked to toaster.
“Don’t burn the house down.” I muttered keeping my eyes on the maze on the back of the box.
Pete glowered at me from across the table. He was gonna tell Ashlee anyway so it didn’t matter. It looked as if I wasn’t gonna get out of this.
“Ashlee, your daughter is pregnant.” Pete told her getting up.
Ashlee looked at me. Her face twisted into a face of disgust. She was ready to glare at me but then I saw a change in her face. “Lucky you! It’s so much fun to have a baby until they grow up into teens like you.”
I could feel tears start growing in my eyes. I had seen the smile but the smile had slowly changed to a smirk and I could feel the smugness glowing off. Ashlee had this idea that never had comebacks. I always did. Half of them were a little inappropriate for her though.
“Hopefully my teen doesn’t hate her kid like you! It won’t be her fault if she turns out a boy! It won’t be his fault if he’s a girl! It’ll be my fault for thinking I’d get something but get something else. It was my try! It was my fucking fault not the kids!” I screamed.
“I’m pressing charges!” Ashlee screamed back.
Tears skidded down my checks. I knew this would be good. I also knew what my next plan was.
“For what?” Pete asked gently.
“She can pass the news to Trace and you can it to Joe. Those two raped me and she watched and laughed bitterly.” Ashlee exclaimed like it was really the most palpable thing in the world.
“Trace wouldn’t fucking do that!” I yelled back. I couldn’t believe I’d just defended the fuck that had dumped me because I was carrying his baby.
“Joe wouldn’t fucking do that!” Pete repeated me. At least he got to defend a fuck that wasn’t a fuck.
I wiped my teary eyes to look at Ashlee clearly. Pete looked very confused, as if he didn’t understand. This as just stupid. Ashlee was pressing fake charges against Pete’s best friend and my fuck face.
“Fuck you guys!” I ran down the stairs to my room and repacked my suitcases. I was running away. You couldn’t pay me enough to watch this fucking trial.
I’d run away, it was immature and stupid but I’d do it anyway.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Yo yo, I changed it to four weeks cuz x-PhotoProofKisses-x
made me actually think. So yah.. I guess I'll get to my eagerly
waiting question.
This is the second time Estella has thought about running away, will she really run away?
Will Ashlee really have a trial?
Will Pete care if Estella ran away?
Would Estella make an impression if she ran away?
If she didn't run away would Ashlee take the shot gun on Pete's nightstand and kill her?
If she doesn't will Ashlee do more abuse?
HAHA!! I'm listening to Sing It Loud's Best Beating Heart!!
Bestest song after a couple FOB, TAI, and Metro Station songs,
lol!!
Alrite people, you may notice that "OH MY GOSH, WHAT HAPPENED TO THE OTHER CHAPTERS?!"
Well they were deleted & they will be re-released but BETTER! Yah, they kinda sucked
getting to the end so I deleted them until I liked the chapter (this one) & those deleted
chapters will be remade so they're better. Well at least I hope YOU think they're better.
While I'm at it check out this really freaking awesome song, "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rIPZqG1t72M":. It's Toxic (Britney Spears Cover) by A Toxic Lullibuy. Uh so yah, I guess that's all. The chapters are going to be re-release (& hopefully better) & me and my friend, Matt are releasing a future do's & don't's thing. So yah.
Peace.Love.Rock
Only Este
^--^
I looked at the fifth birth predictor. The little pink plus sign mocked me by looking like a plus. I was in distress! I was pregnant! I shouldn’t be fucking pregnant unless Trace didn’t use a fucking condom…..
I sprinted to the sex shit aisle. I had no idea what a condom looked like but now I knew and there wasn’t anything that resembled Trace’s “condom”. In fact, Trace hadn’t used a condom, just his penis not anything else.
I would be a seventeen year old mother in six months. Oh damn, would Pete and Ashlee be mad. What would Trace think?!
Nothing to do but wait three months tell them. Besides, what would three months do. Oh wait, don’t pregnant people get fat?!?! I need to tell Trace, Pete, William, Ashlee, Hailey, Vicky, Rachel, Mason, Sisky, and Gabe.
Oh my fucking shit, I’m fucking pregnant! How am I gonna tell everyone?!?!
Calm the fuck down, Estella, I can get through this. I repeated to myself.
I threw money at the cashier and ran to my house. It was so weird. Trace had used a condom. Hailey had sex four times, each time the guy wore a condom and she didn’t get pregnant which only brought me to the idea that Trace hadn’t used one. But why would he do that to me, knowing fairly well I’d get pregnant?
“Hey sweetheart,” Trace answered his cell.
“Hey sexy, can you meet me at the park?” I asked in my innocent I love you voice. I so didn’t love him as much anymore.
“Yeah, I’ll be right here.” Trace replied. That meant twenty minutes in Trace talk.
Trace was sitting against a tree. I leaned into his chest my entire body staying in him. We were just sitting there watching everyone around us. Trace was playing with my hair that wasn’t hidden today.
“Trace, baby, I’ve got some news.” I finally said.
My pride wasn’t anywhere near me. My guts weren’t talking. My happiness was disappearing in every word I thought of to say. I sucked in a breath.
“Well, you remember the sex last night. It was really great and all. I mean, I loved it! But I’m,” I turned to look him in the eyes but I couldn’t do it so I hid in his chest that was only covered by a light grey v-neck shirt, “pregnant.”
“Sexy, look at me.” He picked my head up out of his chest with his hands. “Don’t be ashamed. This thing always happens when people don’t use a condom. You’re seventeen you’ll figure this out.”
“Trace, you’re the dad. I was a virgin. This is your fucking kid.” I said clearly.
“I can’t take care of it! Estella, we’re over.” Trace hurried picked me up and dropped me back down. He rushed away faster than he picked up a guitar.
The world went slower after he said those two little words “we’re over”. How could two words like that change my life so much?
My heart was in more than two. I felt as if I didn’t have a heart I actually owned. My heart was Trace’s and I despised it for still loving him.
I picked myself up and dragged my feet to through the park.
Conversations went around me but I couldn’t hear them. People, dogs, Frisbees, and balls flew past me but I couldn’t see them. I couldn’t hear or see anything but all of last night’s events.
Nothing made since anymore. Nothing mattered. I felt dead but alive. I didn’t feel high anymore but I didn’t feel sober. I felt nothing. I felt no hate, no love, no compassion, no sadness, nothing at all for anyone. Everyone was the same. They may not look the same but inside everyone was trying to achieve the same thing. Knock up someone so they could dump them or kill their child on the inside because of gender.
I wasn’t mad at the world. I was mad at the people who lived on it.
I didn’t regret my first time. I didn’t regret who I did it with. I didn’t regret anything about it.
I regretted being born. I regretted my life. I hated myself for being so stupid.
I walked inside our house. Sisky and William were there. Their lips moved and I’m sure they were talking to me. I couldn’t hear it. The only words that I heard were Trace’s from last night, “I swear I won’t forget you. I’ll return your phone calls and still hang with you after the sex”. He hadn’t said anything about when I got knocked up just the sex. He had played by the rules but he didn’t fight fair. If he wanted to do this, we would do it. Nothing mattered anymore. I was dust in the wind. That’s all that mattered but this piece of dust was rising up.
“I’ll be in my room.” I muttered.
The two hadn’t heard me. My lips didn’t feel right moving.
“I’ll be in my room!” I screamed.
“What happened last night?” Sisky asked.
“I got knocked up by Trace but today he said it’s over because I got knocked up and now he doesn’t wanna date me.” I replied shrugging like it was the most common answer in the world.
“Oh.” Was all William said. His mouth was open in awe
“The fucker doesn’t fight fair so I’m not going to fight fair either.” I told him.
“Estella.” Sisky warned.
“Leave me the fuck alone.”
I was in pain. I didn’t want fucking revenge I wanted Trace back. The pain inside was running through me. Burning me with the flame that had started it.
I knew what our sex had been. It was another checkmark for Trace. It wasn’t important to him. Everything he had said last night was recycled from the last girl. Why waste new words on a new girl, right?! Wrong.
Every word was a lie. Every word was a regret for me. Every word was just a sweet nothing for the one he didn’t care about. The words were nothing. I was nothing. I wanna say I’m sucker for famous faces but that would be a lie. The truth, though hard to admit, I’m a sucker for Trace. I’m fucking blind for him.
He wasn’t worth crying for which was why I was here, lying on my face, my pillow was soaked with m salty tears. All I had to tell myself was he wasn’t worth the tears. He didn’t deserve them. Every time that ran through my head I knew I couldn’t stop crying.
I heard a garage door open. The front door slammed. The garage door reopened. Everything was quiet. I could hear my heart. I could hear my tears. I couldn’t feel them. I didn’t want to.
A baby was in my arms. She was perfect. She would have a perfect upcoming life. The only problem was she had a dad but he didn’t want her. He didn’t like her. He didn’t know her.
I put her down in her crib and went to answer the door.
“Hey Estella, get rid of the baby and you can have me back.” Trace smirked. He knew I would do anything for him. I loved him. My heart stopped and my mind stopped. All I did was listen and obey.
I picked up a knife. I opened the door to the baby’s room.
“Say goodbye.” I stabbed the knife through her. Blood squirted everywhere.
I ran back down to be enveloped in a hug by one true love. My first time.
He wasn’t there. All that was left was a head. It started talking as soon as I was in sight.
“That’ really sad. You’d kill your own baby to be with me. I can’t believe. We had everything. Don’t you get it, we’re over. That baby ruined us. Don’t even try to fix us. Just leave me. You just killed your baby.” The head disappeared.
I stood dumbfounded in the arch of my door. He was right.
I would do anything - like kill someone – for him. I was in horrible condition. His image was stuck in my eyes. His voice replayed in my mind. My heart fluttered at every thought for that guy.
I was horrible.
I woke startled and concerned. That dream was so real, so perfect. I knew for a fact I was trying to tell myself something. I’d gotten the message. I couldn’t not care though. That would be a waste of time.
I cared about it and that was obvious. Trace was done, I wasn’t. Nothing was the same. I knew it; everyone else that cared knew it. Trace didn’t obviously. He would be sorry though. Trace would be so sorry it wouldn’t be funny.
“Good morning daddy.” I faked a smile at him. “I’ve got some,” I shifted around my mind looking for the right word to call my pregnancy, “fascinating news, which I prefer you didn’t tell Ashlee.”
“Uh, yeah sure.” My dad replied sipping his coffee.
“I’m pregnant.” I muttered taking out my cereal box.
“What?” he asked putting down the newspaper onto the table.
“I’m pregnant, meaning I’m gonna have a baby.” I told him putting my cereal into the bowl.
“You’re what?” Pete roared angrily.
I had this odd feeling he had heard me this time. “I’m pregnant.”
“Are you positive?”
“I took the test five times.”
“Who’s the father?”
“Uh… Trace Cyrus.” I answered looking down at the blue china bowl.
“Your mother is gonna hear about this!” he exclaimed.
Well at least I got it out. I already knew Ashlee was going to give me a hard time but my dad; I couldn’t believe him. If she was on tour then he wouldn’t care this much.
Ashlee’s loud yawn was heard from the stairs. She came into the kitchen wearing her bright blue pajamas covered with cherries and a red tinted see through slip. She itched the messy bun her red hair was in.
“Good morning honey, good morning fuck face.” She gave Pete a peck on the lips and walked to toaster.
“Don’t burn the house down.” I muttered keeping my eyes on the maze on the back of the box.
Pete glowered at me from across the table. He was gonna tell Ashlee anyway so it didn’t matter. It looked as if I wasn’t gonna get out of this.
“Ashlee, your daughter is pregnant.” Pete told her getting up.
Ashlee looked at me. Her face twisted into a face of disgust. She was ready to glare at me but then I saw a change in her face. “Lucky you! It’s so much fun to have a baby until they grow up into teens like you.”
I could feel tears start growing in my eyes. I had seen the smile but the smile had slowly changed to a smirk and I could feel the smugness glowing off. Ashlee had this idea that never had comebacks. I always did. Half of them were a little inappropriate for her though.
“Hopefully my teen doesn’t hate her kid like you! It won’t be her fault if she turns out a boy! It won’t be his fault if he’s a girl! It’ll be my fault for thinking I’d get something but get something else. It was my try! It was my fucking fault not the kids!” I screamed.
“I’m pressing charges!” Ashlee screamed back.
Tears skidded down my checks. I knew this would be good. I also knew what my next plan was.
“For what?” Pete asked gently.
“She can pass the news to Trace and you can it to Joe. Those two raped me and she watched and laughed bitterly.” Ashlee exclaimed like it was really the most palpable thing in the world.
“Trace wouldn’t fucking do that!” I yelled back. I couldn’t believe I’d just defended the fuck that had dumped me because I was carrying his baby.
“Joe wouldn’t fucking do that!” Pete repeated me. At least he got to defend a fuck that wasn’t a fuck.
I wiped my teary eyes to look at Ashlee clearly. Pete looked very confused, as if he didn’t understand. This as just stupid. Ashlee was pressing fake charges against Pete’s best friend and my fuck face.
“Fuck you guys!” I ran down the stairs to my room and repacked my suitcases. I was running away. You couldn’t pay me enough to watch this fucking trial.
I’d run away, it was immature and stupid but I’d do it anyway.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Yo yo, I changed it to four weeks cuz x-PhotoProofKisses-x
made me actually think. So yah.. I guess I'll get to my eagerly
waiting question.
This is the second time Estella has thought about running away, will she really run away?
Will Ashlee really have a trial?
Will Pete care if Estella ran away?
Would Estella make an impression if she ran away?
If she didn't run away would Ashlee take the shot gun on Pete's nightstand and kill her?
If she doesn't will Ashlee do more abuse?
HAHA!! I'm listening to Sing It Loud's Best Beating Heart!!
Bestest song after a couple FOB, TAI, and Metro Station songs,
lol!!
Alrite people, you may notice that "OH MY GOSH, WHAT HAPPENED TO THE OTHER CHAPTERS?!"
Well they were deleted & they will be re-released but BETTER! Yah, they kinda sucked
getting to the end so I deleted them until I liked the chapter (this one) & those deleted
chapters will be remade so they're better. Well at least I hope YOU think they're better.
While I'm at it check out this really freaking awesome song, "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rIPZqG1t72M":. It's Toxic (Britney Spears Cover) by A Toxic Lullibuy. Uh so yah, I guess that's all. The chapters are going to be re-release (& hopefully better) & me and my friend, Matt are releasing a future do's & don't's thing. So yah.
Peace.Love.Rock
Only Este
^--^
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