Categories > Original > Fantasy > Moonlight at Midnight
Sinking Under
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The sun shined brightly through my window when I finally woke up. It had been one very painful afternoon, and I felt guilty for making Jacob sit through it.
Jacob. The one simple name made me turn in bed, to the warm body next to me. He was awake.
He looked at me, cautiously, waiting for the tears to stream down my cheeks.
I sighed, a little too dramatically. Jacob flinched. “I’m ok, Jacob. Really.”
He just stared at me, coldly.
“I swear it, Jacob! I’m so sorry you had to watch that last night.” I said. I tried to smile. It was a very sorry attempt.
He came over and hugged me. “I didn’t think you cared for him that much. Maybe you overre-“
I cut him off. “The only person who overreacted was him. I’m not going back there, just to get my heart torn out again! There was life before Lucian, and there will be life after him!”
Jacob smiled. “Good, cause I didn’t like him anyways.”
That made me laugh as I got up to go brush my teeth. I gasped when I looked at myself in the mirror.
“Oh my god.” Was all I could chirp out. “Jacob!” I yelled. “Why didn’t you tell me that I looked like an undead zombie back from her grave?!”
“Ugh…..I didn’t notice.” He said from the other room.
“Sure.” I mumbled. I got cleaned up, and dressed. It was 9:07 A.M. And it was time to do something very uncomfortable, mostly now.
I needed to face the fact that I couldn’t hide forever. I had to go to school eventually. And I needed to return Sarah’s dress. That I knew could wait, but I also knew that I needed to cut myself away from Lucian as best as I could.
“You don’t have to go, you know.” Jacob whispered.
“But yet I do. If I don’t do it now and get it all over with, it’ll be too hard to do later. Besides, I’ve got to return her dress.” I told him.
It toke a while to finally convince Jacob to go home. He kept insisting that he insisting that he go with me, but I knew how that would turn out.
I saw him waiting for me, right next to Sarah. I almost turned around, but the voice in my head called me a coward.
And I am not a coward. Just a little wimpy.
I toke a deep breath and walked forward. Lucian was not expecting this, because he looked at me with a surprised expression.
“Hey Sarah.” I finally choked out.
“Oh, hello Anna. How are you?” she seemed hopeful. I hope she knew that it wasn’t going to happen. Mostly now.
“I’m great, thanks. I’ve come to return your dress, since it seems I won’t be needing it after all.”
She looked at me, confused, when I handed her the big white box I had been carrying all day.
But Anna! It was a gift. Besides, I thought-“
“No.” I cut her off. She looked from Lucian to me, then back to the box.
“Anna-“
“No.” I snapped. I hurriedly walked off, to the gym for my next class. If only time would go faster.
And boy did it fly by. Soon it was time for us all to go home. I had just reached my car, when I noticed him.
“Anna.” Lucian called. I couldn’t face him. Not now. I would probably break down.
“What do you want?” I snapped.
He grinned at me, but this smile was somehow different. Like it wasn’t really Lucian. Shivers ran up my spine.
“Can I talk to you?” he asked.
“No.” I answered. His smile disappeared.
“Why not?”
“Because you could have talked to me yesterday Lucian. Yesterday! Not today, after I spent that whole night crying!”
"Anna, calm down." he warned me.
"No! You yell at me for something that I didn't even know what it was, then you expect me to come crawling my way back into you arms?! I don't think so. You broke my heart, and quite frankly, I don't think it can ever be fixed. Not now, not ever." I yelled.
I'm so sorry Anna. I really am. Please, calm down." he begged.
I sighed, and closed my car door. "You could have been sorry yesterday."
I left him in the parking lot. I finally got home and curled up on my bed. Diana wasn't home, so I didn't have to worry about her. My cell phone kept going off all night. I didn't have the heart to answer it.
I cried for what seemed like days. Finally, I feel asleep.
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I watched the rain drip off my window. I had nothing better to do. Diana didn't ask any questions, though even if she did. She wouldn't get any answers. I had locked myself in my room for the most part. Only when I had to eat did I go downstairs.
Today was when Lucian and I were supposed to go to the beach. Not that there was any chance of going anyhow, since I completely ignore him. But the rain just supported the dilemma. Lucian and I weren't meant to be. It was as if a sign from God.
I had 43 missed calls when I woke up. 37 were from Lucian, 3 from Jacob, 2 from Diana, and 1 from an unknown number. He kept calling me, but I didn't need the stress now. I was in a healing process. And this was my way to it.
Diana had Jacob come down and try to talk me into my senses, but that just made things worse. I wouldn't open my door, and Diana just left me alone. That I was grateful for. I didn't want her to try to make me feel better. It would just make me feel worse.
"Annastashia! Please come downstairs! Someone’s here to see you!" I heard Diana yell. Probably Jacob. Ugh.
"No." I yelled back at her. I didn't feel like going out. Not today.
"Come on Anna! I am so sick of you moping around!" Diana then began to beat on my door.
This for some reason, made me upset. It seemed that my emotions were on overdrive. I had only known him for a few months! Why would I be acting as if I was the only one left on earth?
The moment Diana heard my sobs, she went downstairs, but not before dramatically sighing. I heard the front door shut, and a car drive away. I didn’t even dare to look out the window. I didn’t want to see their face; an expression of hopelessness.
I finally calmed myself down, and went downstairs. Diana was in the kitchen, crying. This, of course, made me feel considerably horrible.
“Mom, please. Don’t cry! I’m so sorry. I promise, I won’t do that again.” I pleaded.
“Anna, what has happened to you? You have been acting as if all the world had died, and that you’re the only one left! It makes me feel so bad, knowing I can’t do anything to help you. Anna, sweetie, he was just a boy. He’s not worth it. No one is, if your gonna treat yourself like this.”
I knew she was right. I had lived well before I had even met Lucian, and I’m pretty sure I can live without him. That’s when I made the promise to myself. I will not die because of Lucian. I will not sink into a miserable dwelling that I have been slowly reaching. Never will I depend on one person like that again.
I spent the rest of the night with Diana. We ate dinner, and sat in silence and watched TV like we normally would on a rainy Saturday. When it was 12, I decided to head to bed.
What I saw when I opened my door made me scream. Someone had been in my room. It was literally destroyed. My clothes were shed all over the floor, and my dressers were laid out on my bed. It was as if they were looking for something. I cleaned my room, and opened my closet.
I couldn’t believe what happened next.
Jacob. The one simple name made me turn in bed, to the warm body next to me. He was awake.
He looked at me, cautiously, waiting for the tears to stream down my cheeks.
I sighed, a little too dramatically. Jacob flinched. “I’m ok, Jacob. Really.”
He just stared at me, coldly.
“I swear it, Jacob! I’m so sorry you had to watch that last night.” I said. I tried to smile. It was a very sorry attempt.
He came over and hugged me. “I didn’t think you cared for him that much. Maybe you overre-“
I cut him off. “The only person who overreacted was him. I’m not going back there, just to get my heart torn out again! There was life before Lucian, and there will be life after him!”
Jacob smiled. “Good, cause I didn’t like him anyways.”
That made me laugh as I got up to go brush my teeth. I gasped when I looked at myself in the mirror.
“Oh my god.” Was all I could chirp out. “Jacob!” I yelled. “Why didn’t you tell me that I looked like an undead zombie back from her grave?!”
“Ugh…..I didn’t notice.” He said from the other room.
“Sure.” I mumbled. I got cleaned up, and dressed. It was 9:07 A.M. And it was time to do something very uncomfortable, mostly now.
I needed to face the fact that I couldn’t hide forever. I had to go to school eventually. And I needed to return Sarah’s dress. That I knew could wait, but I also knew that I needed to cut myself away from Lucian as best as I could.
“You don’t have to go, you know.” Jacob whispered.
“But yet I do. If I don’t do it now and get it all over with, it’ll be too hard to do later. Besides, I’ve got to return her dress.” I told him.
It toke a while to finally convince Jacob to go home. He kept insisting that he insisting that he go with me, but I knew how that would turn out.
I saw him waiting for me, right next to Sarah. I almost turned around, but the voice in my head called me a coward.
And I am not a coward. Just a little wimpy.
I toke a deep breath and walked forward. Lucian was not expecting this, because he looked at me with a surprised expression.
“Hey Sarah.” I finally choked out.
“Oh, hello Anna. How are you?” she seemed hopeful. I hope she knew that it wasn’t going to happen. Mostly now.
“I’m great, thanks. I’ve come to return your dress, since it seems I won’t be needing it after all.”
She looked at me, confused, when I handed her the big white box I had been carrying all day.
But Anna! It was a gift. Besides, I thought-“
“No.” I cut her off. She looked from Lucian to me, then back to the box.
“Anna-“
“No.” I snapped. I hurriedly walked off, to the gym for my next class. If only time would go faster.
And boy did it fly by. Soon it was time for us all to go home. I had just reached my car, when I noticed him.
“Anna.” Lucian called. I couldn’t face him. Not now. I would probably break down.
“What do you want?” I snapped.
He grinned at me, but this smile was somehow different. Like it wasn’t really Lucian. Shivers ran up my spine.
“Can I talk to you?” he asked.
“No.” I answered. His smile disappeared.
“Why not?”
“Because you could have talked to me yesterday Lucian. Yesterday! Not today, after I spent that whole night crying!”
"Anna, calm down." he warned me.
"No! You yell at me for something that I didn't even know what it was, then you expect me to come crawling my way back into you arms?! I don't think so. You broke my heart, and quite frankly, I don't think it can ever be fixed. Not now, not ever." I yelled.
I'm so sorry Anna. I really am. Please, calm down." he begged.
I sighed, and closed my car door. "You could have been sorry yesterday."
I left him in the parking lot. I finally got home and curled up on my bed. Diana wasn't home, so I didn't have to worry about her. My cell phone kept going off all night. I didn't have the heart to answer it.
I cried for what seemed like days. Finally, I feel asleep.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I watched the rain drip off my window. I had nothing better to do. Diana didn't ask any questions, though even if she did. She wouldn't get any answers. I had locked myself in my room for the most part. Only when I had to eat did I go downstairs.
Today was when Lucian and I were supposed to go to the beach. Not that there was any chance of going anyhow, since I completely ignore him. But the rain just supported the dilemma. Lucian and I weren't meant to be. It was as if a sign from God.
I had 43 missed calls when I woke up. 37 were from Lucian, 3 from Jacob, 2 from Diana, and 1 from an unknown number. He kept calling me, but I didn't need the stress now. I was in a healing process. And this was my way to it.
Diana had Jacob come down and try to talk me into my senses, but that just made things worse. I wouldn't open my door, and Diana just left me alone. That I was grateful for. I didn't want her to try to make me feel better. It would just make me feel worse.
"Annastashia! Please come downstairs! Someone’s here to see you!" I heard Diana yell. Probably Jacob. Ugh.
"No." I yelled back at her. I didn't feel like going out. Not today.
"Come on Anna! I am so sick of you moping around!" Diana then began to beat on my door.
This for some reason, made me upset. It seemed that my emotions were on overdrive. I had only known him for a few months! Why would I be acting as if I was the only one left on earth?
The moment Diana heard my sobs, she went downstairs, but not before dramatically sighing. I heard the front door shut, and a car drive away. I didn’t even dare to look out the window. I didn’t want to see their face; an expression of hopelessness.
I finally calmed myself down, and went downstairs. Diana was in the kitchen, crying. This, of course, made me feel considerably horrible.
“Mom, please. Don’t cry! I’m so sorry. I promise, I won’t do that again.” I pleaded.
“Anna, what has happened to you? You have been acting as if all the world had died, and that you’re the only one left! It makes me feel so bad, knowing I can’t do anything to help you. Anna, sweetie, he was just a boy. He’s not worth it. No one is, if your gonna treat yourself like this.”
I knew she was right. I had lived well before I had even met Lucian, and I’m pretty sure I can live without him. That’s when I made the promise to myself. I will not die because of Lucian. I will not sink into a miserable dwelling that I have been slowly reaching. Never will I depend on one person like that again.
I spent the rest of the night with Diana. We ate dinner, and sat in silence and watched TV like we normally would on a rainy Saturday. When it was 12, I decided to head to bed.
What I saw when I opened my door made me scream. Someone had been in my room. It was literally destroyed. My clothes were shed all over the floor, and my dressers were laid out on my bed. It was as if they were looking for something. I cleaned my room, and opened my closet.
I couldn’t believe what happened next.
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