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“I CAN’T DO THIS!” Blair cried as she paced back stage. Bella rolled her eyes as Jay stood in front of Blair resting his hands on her shoulders.

“Yes you can, just go to your special place” he said looking at Blair.

“Eww Jay” she said cringing at what he said.

“I didn’t mean it that way, although I’d like to visit your special place” he added with a smirk as Blair glared at him. “Okay Sorry god...’ he said laughing. “Your going to be fine, just channel your inner rock star” he added with a kind grin. “I know you can do it” he said gently as Blair began to relax.

“You really think I can?” she asked as sheer terror ran through her veins.
“Not only do I think you can do it, I wanna give you something that helped me the first time I went on stage with the band” he said slipping his hand into his pocket. He pulled out a black leather cuff adorned with silver spikes.

“Now I know this doesn’t look like much,” Jay began as he fastened it around Blair’s wrist “but I found it brought me peace of mind when the first time I did a gig” he said seriously. “And now that I have that peace of mind, I’m giving this to you til you feel strong enough to be your real self” he said as he finished fixing it around her wrist. “There you go” he said looking up at Blair.

“Jay..” she said trying to think of something to say but remaining at a loss for words. “This is...Thanks” she said struggling to get the last word out, she suddenly flung her arms around Jay hugging him tightly. Jay stood there momentarily shocked by the close contact before wrapping his arms around Blair and holding her tightly.

“Your welcome” he whispered quietly into her hair before pulling away. He heard the MC take the stage and announce their band, he grinned at the rest of the group as they picked up their instruments . He watched as they walked past him as he turned to look at Blair, Blair looked up from staring at her feet to see Jay offering his hand to her.

“Come on, it’s now or never” he said sincerely as Blair nodded, she rested her hand in his as he led her towards the roar of the crowd.



“So we had an affair?” Cami said quietly as The Rev nodded.
“Well not so much an affair, but you were married if that makes sense. But you and Gerard were seperated” The Rev said nodding his head shamefacedly. “You have no idea how much you regretted it, Well I guess you do with the whole suicide thing” he said as he stood up. “Coffee?” he asked Cami. She nodded getting up and following him into the kitchen as he waited for the coffee to brew.

“So why did I do it?” Cami asked looking up at Rev.

“Gerard” The Rev replied quietly. “The guy doesn’t know how to function with that kind of genius. I guess that’s why he started drinking again way back when” he said simply as the coffee finished brewing and he poured a cup for both himself and Cami.

“Drinking? What do you mean?” Cami asked her eyebrows raised as she took a sip from her coffee.
“Your husband is a recovered alcoholic” The Rev stated. “After you guys got married we were friends, you me and Gee” he said. “And then it came time for MCR to go back to work, they recorded a new album which was awesome did really well. Grammy nods the whole deal. But touring took it’s toll on Gerard, I know this cause Avenged did a massive tour with them after they were done promoting their album with their own world tour which ran a solid 8 months. Well the pressure and stress started to get to Gerard and he started to drink again. Everyone tried talking him out of it, Mikey, Frank, Bob, Ray even your mom who happened to fly out for a show to see your dad, but he didnt want to listen to what everyone had to say, he didnt want to stop drinking” he said taking a breather as he took another sip from his cup.

“What happened after everyone tried to talk to him? Cami asked curiously as she sat up on the bench.

“You left Gerard. He got so drunk one night he held you up by your neck against the wall, you nearly died. You flew out here and became separated from him, of course Blair was with you the whole time; no one told him where you were” he said. “Not even his own brother” The Rev said quietly.

“We started to hang out regularly and it developed into something more than friendship. We dated while you and Gerard were separated that’s when all those photo’s and letters were taken. Gerard knew we were together but he was so far gone most of the time it probably got lost in there somewhere" he said tapping his finger against his temple.

“But what does that have to do with me trying to kill myself?” Cami said her eyebrows knitting together in confusion.

“Well you and Gerard eventually started talking again and he slowly stopped drinking. However the night of Blair’s 5th birthday things went downhill” The rev said as he filled his and Cami’s cups again with coffee as they took a sip.

“Gerard did a massive concert and he dedicated it to Blair and everything was fine until after the concert, Gerard had a few drinks; more than a few actually” he said quietly.
“You and him got into a massive screaming match over it, so I decided to take Blair away from it; get her an ice cream or something. It had been raining that night and the road was slippery. I lost control of the wheel and crashed the car. Blair ended up in the hospital and you blamed me and Gerard, but mostly yourself for not paying enough attention to Gerard in the past when he toured with that album, not visiting him enough on tour to keep him sane and for Blair’s accident. You just snapped and well..you know the rest” he said reluctantly as Cami stood there cold washing over every inch of her being. She placed her cup on the counter.

“I..I..I gotta go” Cami managed to get out, she burst out of the house hyperventilating as she got into her rented car driving down to the pier in Huntington Beach. The sun had set and the surf was rough. Cami got out of the car slowly trembling as she walked along the pier, how could it have all gone so wrong?

She reached the edge of the pier her fingers still trembling as she managed to pull her carton of cigarette’s from her pocket, her hands shaking as she lit the cigarette with her lighter. She took a long drag contemplating the waves crashing against the pier, she turned her back walking off the pier back towards the sand of the beach. She walked along in the darkness with nothing but her thoughts buzzing around in her head. She stubbed her cigarette out in the sand as she walked towards the water, she took off her shoes throwing them onto the sand along with her socks as she waded into the ocean. She felt the salt water soak her jeans as she waded in up to her waist, she dived under the water a cathartic feeling overwhelming her as everything came flooding back.

The time they first met

When he comforted her after Ollie cheated on her

When they slept together for the first time

When he proposed to her

When they married

Cami felt as she surfaced her tears mingle with the droplets of salt water clinging to her face, she dragged herself back to the shore making her way to the parking lot. She got in her rented car, resting her head on the steering wheel as she sobbed quietly.

She had missed so much.




Gerard made his way into the dimly lit bar, his head hung low with his hoodie on. He took a seat at the bar, looking around.
It had been a while since he had been here.
Gerard ordered vodka straight up downing it the moment it hit the bar. He ordered another straight away downing that too before he started alternating between Vodka and Whiskey. He felt as the alcohol began to take effect on his body overriding his senses as his thoughts swirled around in his head.

Cami had cheated

His life was falling apart

He loved her

Cami had cheated

He loved her still

Gerard sighed lifting his head to signal the bartender to pour him another drink, the bartender did so willingly setting it down in front of him as he lifted it to his lips; the vodka burning his throat as it ran down it so quickly. He sighed miserably as he looked down at his ring finger; he felt naked. Even after Cami had disappeared he had continued to wear the ring, not out of guilt but out of devotion to the women he had deemed to be his soul-mate. Even though he felt as if his heart had just been through a garbage disposal he knew that was only scratching the surface of the inevitable which was to come.

He sighed as he drunkenly stumbled out of the bar; trying to pull his carton of cigarette’s from his pocket. He managed to get them out pulling one from the carton sticking it between his lips. He fumbled with his lighter as he tried to catch the flame, giving up he threw it to the ground frustrated. He stood there quietly leaning against the wall in misery when he noticed something out of the corner of his eye; he turned smiling as his cigarette caught in the flame.

“You look like you needed it” they said standing beside him. He looked up scowling as he met their gaze.

“And to what do I owe this pleasure Lyn-Z”


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