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Gin&Cal
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Stuttering 124
I looked at Roman who was sleeping on the table with his fist in his mouth snoring. Sofi woke up from her cat nap and was pulling on Patrick's pant leg. It was Mikey who noticed the little lady first and went straight for her. I cringed a bit as she squeezed his cheeks and whined. She did NOT like strangers.
"Be nice Sofi." Patrick stated picking a piece of lint off of her.
Sofi went straight for Mikey's glasses and then suddenly stopped. Taking glasses off is a no-no, just like pulling uncle Joe's hair. She then when limp in his arms and started to eat her foot. Bob then took Sofi away from Mikey and tickled her belly. This amused everyone in the room and I smiled politely.
"Well then," I said putting her bottle down, "you do it Bob."
Bob looked utterly confused and then took the bottle away from me. Sofi looked at him with trepidation and slowly started to take the bottle. This amused Bob greatly and Mikey got a bit jealous. The way she touched Bobs beard in amusement confused Patrick but at least she wasn't crying or pulling hair. She actually seemed to like the new people.
"Why is he sleeping on the table like that?" Mikey asked touching Roman's foot.
"Because that's where he fell asleep." Gin, Patrick, Joe and myself stated at the same time.
"You can't win every battle with these 2. So if Roman wants to sleep on the table. Or if Sofi wants to sleep under the piano we just let them. Just as long as they are breathing it's fine. Just throw a blanket over them and keep on moving." I concluded.
"I use to sleep in door ways." Mikey added as Sofi, who was finished with her bottle threw it in Roman's direction.
"Que carajo es eso Sofi? That is not polite." I scolded.
Sofi rolled her eyes and sighed. She's forever gonna be tormenting Roman. But one day he's gonna take her out and I'll be in the corner laughing my ass off.
"What are we doing for your birthday Cal?" Patrick asked as he pulled me into his lap.
"When's that?" Mikey questioned.
"Tomorrow." Gin stated.
"So what are we doing today?" Joe asked.
"Nothing. Im pregnant. STILL. And we can't drink if I can't drink." Gin said matter-of-factly, "Im pregnant on St. Patrick's day. And we're in Chicago...I should be ½ way plowed already."
This made me laugh only because I could truly see she was miserable.
**
One morning I woke and there were more people then usual in my house. I heard this annoying, high pitched, desperate, crying and this confused me. My kids didn't do that anymore. It was when Pete busted into my room and Patrick came in behind him giggling that I remembered what today was.
"Get the hell out of my room!" I yelled, "I don't have any clothes on."
"Because that's new." Pete muttered and then walked out.
"Fuck you Wentz!"
"I only fuck your baby daddy!" Pete shot.
"There will be no fucking of Wentz's here!" Ashlee shot defeated from downstairs. At the sound of her voice Pete decided to go bother her.
"Mmm, its my little mamacita." Patrick said as he shut the door behind Pete and locked it.
I rolled my eyes and watched the babies sleep.
Patrick crawled over the blanket and had his weight on me. I licked my lips and he kissed me roughly. His eyes looked into mine and then he motioned to the bathroom, knowing exactly what he wanted at this 6a. I swiftly complied and ran into the bathroom with him on my heels.
35 minutes later I was clean and he exhaled. I decided to lie down next to the babies a bit longer when Pete ran back into the room. I don't know why he insists on running in here. I guess he really wanted the twins awake so he had someone to play with, considering Izzy was now asleep and no longer held his attention.
Roman flinched next to me and Sofi popped her head up looking around. I groaned a bit annoyed. Now she's never gonna leave Roman alone. She started some crazy jibber jabber and smacked Roman on the face. Roman's green eyes shot open and he cried out. Sofi said something that sounded like 'Don't be a bitch' and I swear she said that, which made me laugh even harder.
"Well since you insist on waking them, here. Give her a bath. I'll take him- and have your lover help you." I stated.
"But she's got girly parts." Pete pouted.
"Don't even try that." I said dangerously, "you do have a daughter."
"Oooooh! Lady!" Patrick squealed.
Sofi made the same sound and jumped out of Pete's arms and into her dads.
"Petrick! Go clean her. Now." I dictated.
"She's mean." Pete stated.
"Shut up. I love her." Patrick added.
"So."
"I can hear you Petrick."
"I didn't-" Patrick started.
"Don't care."
"Stop getting us in trouble Pete."
"Fine."
I took Roman downstairs and used that bathroom. He was sitting in the sink playing with the bubbles. After I cleaned him and washed his hair I grabbed another wash cloth to clean his mouth. As if overnight he sprang 4 teeth. 2 on the top and 2 on the bottom. He made no fuss over it. Sofi on the other hand did the crying for both of them when her teeth came in. All I had to deal with was the drooling from Rome.
After my 2 kids were dressed I finally got dressed and went to go see Ashlee.
"Look at you looking like the sexy blond you are." I stated giving her a hug.
"Cali Love! I haven't seen you since 1843!" Ash stated.
"No kidding. How are things?"
"Great. She's so good, although Pete torments her night and day."
"I know exactly what that's like."
"Has anyone seen ahava and bubbie?" I asked
"Who?--- oh. No. Not yet." Patrick sighed, "they're late."
"No. I think we're early." I stated looking at my phone.
Roman and Sofia were sitting in their pack 'n play watching everything around them. There was so much hustle and bustle that they just sat there enthralled. I handed them each their bottles and Patrick went by to ruffle their hair. Sofi pushed his hand away roughly and pouted.
"Patrick, don't upset her!" I yelled.
"I was just-" Patrick started.
I then stopped and caught myself. He was her dad and I was her mom. It was time to talk to him like he wasn't a cheating whore.
"Patrick. She's got this thing where if I do her hair she doesn't want ANY one to touch it. Its just a thing I don't know where it started from but she's just f'n weird."
"Now I know...thank you."
Before I knew it Patrick gave me a kiss and Gin fake gagged walking by.
"Now that's just yuck." Gin stated.
Joe laughed as she continued on into the kitchen.
Patrick looked into the pack n' play again to see Sofia pouting at him still. He then picked her up but she pulled her body away and kept pouting. She wasn't letting this hair thing go.
"Did daddy make you sad Princess?" Patrick asked with a pout of his own.
I saw a camera flash go off and all 3 of us turned to see that the photographer was standing there taking random candid's of us standing about. I laughed slightly as I picked Roman up and Patrick kissed Sofia's forehead. She held his face in between her hands and kissed his cheek.
He was forgiven now for his indiscretion and that made him a happy camper.
Patrick gave her his million dollar smile and we walked over to where the rest of the group was congregated in the piano room.
They had a whole band set up there now complete with drums and a guitar and bass. The photographer was currently shooting test shots of everyone. Pete was for some reason laying on the floor while baby Izzy creeped about. Ashlee sat in her Gin&Cal gown not far away smiling at them.
Gin sat in between Joe's legs attempting to play the guitar she had gotten for him from Slash while Andy laughed at how it kept slipping off her knees. Patrick went over to the stool of the piano and laid across it with Roman on his chest waiting for it to be our turn to take pics. Sofia had wobbled over to Andy and was now tugging on his pant leg trying to get him to pick her up. I went and sat next to Patrick and realized Roman was falling asleep. I pushed his hair out of his face and smiled at Patrick.
"How are my favorite men doing?" I asked giving them both light kisses.
"Rome's getting sleepy and I really think this outfit is itchy." Patrick added.
Patrick scratched at his collar and I laughed as Roman did the same with his shirt.
"Ha. See Roman thinks its itchy too."
"I can see that." I said laughing, "don't worry gentlemen, it won't be much longer."