FicWad

I wake up again, and it’s three. Jesus, I was tired. My head feels better though. I pull myself upright, and look around the room to see Gerard hunched over a table with a marker in his hand. I try not to make any noise, but he hears me and turns around.
“Hey Rain.” He says softly.
“Hi.” My mouth is dry; it’s hard to talk.
Gerard gets up from the table and runs a hand through his hair.
“How do you feel now?” He asks me.
“Better.” I say. It’s true.
“Do you need some water?” Clearly he knows this territory. I nod and he walks to the kitchen, filling up a dark glass at the sink. He hands it to me and I chug it down.
“Hey, slow down alright? Don’t drink it all at once.” I blush and he smiles.
“Are you hungry now?” He asks me. I think about it for a moment.
“Yeah.”
“Ok. Well, I’d give you your clothes but they’re still all wet and stuff. Do you want a pair of my pants or something?” He looks nervous.
“Yeah, sure. We’ll probably just go to a drive through anyway right?”
He laughs. “Yeah. I can’t say I was planning on taking you anyway fancy.” He grabs a pair of long baggy black pants out of his dresser. I can see from where I am that it’s a mess. It makes me smile. My dresser is just as bad.
Gerard hands me the pants. “I don’t know…if you wanna go change…in the bathroom…” I laugh and nod, getting up and making my way to the bathroom. I don’t fall, even if I am going way slower than usual.
It only takes me a second. When I come out I see Gerard opening his cabinet and throwing something into his pocket. I already know what it is. I sigh loudly, and he looks back over his shoulder, alarmed. His hand goes deeper into his pocket. I know I could say something, should say something, but I don’t.
“I’m ready.” I say.
“Mkay.” He says, looking relieved. We walk out, downstairs to his car. It’s freezing.
“What do you want?” He asks.
“Is McDonald’s ok by you? I say embarrassed.
“Sure.” He laughs. “I probably won’t get anything anyway.” He turns back to the road, with an odd expression.
I look out the window, and around the front of the car, for something to do. I can’t think of anything to say. I look on the floor, and I see two or three small clear bottles rolling out from underneath Gerard’s seat. I look up at Gerard. He looks nervous, and as I look away again, I can see him kicking the bottles back under his seat.
He hasn’t stopped drinking. Damn it.
I want to say something. I want to talk to him. I don’t want to lose him.
But I don’t know what to say.
I look back out the window, sighing softly.
I will get through to him, I promise myself. I won’t lose him.


Short...I know. Sorry. I'm working on it.