Categories > Books > Harry Potter > It's A Halloweeny Time of Year?

When in Hogsmeade...

by My--Toro--Romance 0 reviews

ROFL, The marauders know how to PAR-TAY.

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: R - Genres: Humor,Romance - Characters: James,Lily,Lupin,Peter,Sirius - Warnings: [X] - Published: 2009-03-05 - Updated: 2009-03-05 - 1470 words

-1TrainWreck
When In Hogsmeade…

By TonksxMoony

RLSB

A.N The next bit, it was pointed out to me that trick-or-treating (in the UK), Botox and Hair Straighteners weren’t around in the ‘80’s so we’ll make a deal. You ignore all the continuity issues and I give you this chapter, as a gift. Oh and if something comes up, turn a bliiind eyeee... okay, on with the story. Oh and I’m sorry if James comes across as a twat
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The party was already underway as Remus and James staggered into the Hog’s Head. All around were dancing, sweaty bodies, they were like a writhing mass of snakes, weaving around each other. Gryffindor’s, Ravenclaw’s, Hufflepuff’s and Slytherin’s, touching and kissing in every corner. The smell of Firewhisky was thick in the air and the barrels of drink in the corners were dangerously empty. James whistled, impressed at the turnout. He detached himself from Remus and made his way over to the bar where Lily Evans was talking to a masked Hufflepuff. He slid his arms around her waist and buried his face in her neck.

“All right beautiful?” he whispered in her ear. She scowled.

“Potter, get off me right now or so help me I will… I will…”

“You’ll what?” James smirked.

“I don’t know but trust me, you won’t like it. Now leave me alone.”

Pouting, James let go of Lily and leant over the bar.

“All right darlin’?” He leered at the young barmaid who giggled, “Got any whisky going cheap?” He winked. Giggling some more, the barmaid passed him a large bottle of Firewhisky.

“Cheers.” James popped bit off the lid and took a swig. Lily’s scowl deepened.

“James Potter, you are an insufferable git.” James grinned and raised the bottle to her before turning away and walking back to Remus who was chatting to a Ravenclaw boy.

“Oi, oi Remus, look what I‘ve got!” Remus sighed and turned to James,

“James, you know I don’t care about the vast amounts of alchohol you are consuming,” he rolled his eyes at the Ravenclaw who shrugged and walked away,

“Fine,” James turned and made his way into the midst of the crowd.

Remus stood alone, running his hand through his messy brown hair. After a few moments he turned and walked outside. It was strangely quiet outside, with only a muffled beat able to be heard from the street. Remus walked across the road and sat down under a tree, staring at the moon. Now what was it I was thinking about… he thought, tapping the side of his head. Ah yes, I was going to ask Dumbledore why I didn’t transform earlier. He looked up at the moon, it was large and round in the sky, its silvery light filtering through the leaves. He had never seen the moon through human eyes before, well, not that he could remember anyway. He sat, marvelling at its beauty for a while and it wasn’t long until he felt himself drifting off to sleep…

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The muggle party.

Sirius had followed the man back to one of the bedrooms where he had been tied to the bed. Now Sirius wouldn’t usually mind, but he didn’t particularly like the way that he was hanging upside down... Wow, these muggles are into some messed up shit... he thought as the blood rushed to his head. Blood pressure red is so not my colour, I bet I look really unattractive. He was frantically trying to right himself but the wriggle-a-lot theory has been tested and Sirius’ result of fail was not unexpected. He stopped wriggling when he heard the door open and saw the muggle walk out.

“WHAT?” He yelled, feeling a little bit faint, “YOU CAN’T JUST LEAVE ME HERE! I’LL DIE! UNGHH--” The muggle poked his head round the door.

“It’s alright, I’m just off to the kitchen, and I’ll be right back...” He licked his lips.

“Oh well that’s fine then isn’t it, I’ll just die here while you go and make yourself A FUCKING SANDWICH!” The novelty of muggle sex was wearing off and Sirius was wishing he had run just that little bit faster after Remus. Y’know, I could really do with a sandwich, I hope the guy makes two... At that very moment, the muggle walked in waving a bottle that looked suspiciously like squirty cream. Sirius groaned. The guy couldn’t just be a straight-up gay sex in-out guy. Oh no, he had to be, I’ll tie you up and squirt you with various flavoursome liquids until you are shaking with lust, and THEN I’ll stick my willy in you. Okay, back to the task in hand. Sirius was being sprayed. Oh and he was naked, he wasn’t just having his clothes ruined.

“Heehee, that tickles!” giggled Sirius as he was sprayed in a very sensitive area. The muggle lowered his head and began to lick off the cream. Oh no, thought Sirius that’s not right...UGH UGH UGH UGH! Sirius squirmed with all his might but since he was tied to the bed he had nothing to do except wait for the weird muggle to stop licking his privates. After a while, Sirius was starting to enjoy himself and it showed. He had an erection and that, in a teenager is about as much enjoyment as you can have. The muggle had run out of cream some time ago but was still licking, seeming to enjoy the taste of Sirius’ skin. Sirius shivered and moaned, but not for the man fondling his genitals. Oh no, Sirius’ subconscious had tricked him into formulating a rather sexual scene between himself and a certain lycanthrope. So, rather than some random dude, it was dear Remus whose lips were firmly attached to Sirius’ cock. Ahh, the sweet, sweet imagination of teenage boys...

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...and the funny thing was, Remus was having almost the exact same dream as Sirius. Except it was Sirius sucking his cock, rather than him doing it to himself. Which would have been weird. As the clock struck 11, the two boys moaned again and came in unison. It was ok for Sirius; he had someone to swallow his milky goodness. Remus however, had the fortunate experience of squirting jizz all over the inside of his pants. This created a rather sexy damp patch around his crotch. The sudden moisture in his trousers woke Remus with a start,

“Oh bugger” said Remus, failing for once to find an intellectual response to his predicament. This cuss was followed by several others, which if they had been paint would have painted the sky and all of Hogsmeade a beautiful combination of blue and purple. Finally, Remus concluded that the best thing to do would be to just take off his trousers.

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Climax over, Sirius was freed from his tethers and left naked on the bed.

“Thanks mate,” called Sirius as the muggle left the room. There was no reply. Sirius frowned, looking upset for a second before saying,

“He had better not have given me herpes.” He dressed and walked serenely out of the bedroom, down the hallway and out of the front door. Then he made his way back to Hogsmeade. Upon entering the wizarding village, he noticed several things. Number one, it seemed as though the Hogs Head was about to explode, wither from being to full of people or from the thumpin’ bass coming through the cracked windows. Number two (tied in with number one), it seemed that the entire student population of Hogwarts had in fact got into the Hogs Head, regardless of the fact that only 5th- 7th years were actually meant to be there. The third and final point was that there was a Remus Lupin standing in his Y-fronts in the middle of the road. Now it may not have been everyone’s reaction but Sirius was really quite surprised to find this particular Marauder in his undies, in public.

Remus noticed that he had been seen. His eyes widened and from his mouth came the intelligent, “Oh fuck.”
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A.N I’m very sorry about the quality near the end, I was reviewing The Real Mistress Malfoy’s ‘Whatever it takes’ which by the way you should read http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4769960/1/Whatever_it_takes anyway, I was being very silly and so when I tried to focus on this, I just failed. Oh and sorry for my crude use of language.

REVIEWS CAN BE EXCHANGED FOR LOVE OR AN ITEM OF YOUR CHOICE. Just click that cute little button down there (or whereever it is). Story continued on reader feedback.

Tonks. x
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