FicWad

Brendon's POV

I walked into 5th period, and took my usual seat between Caro and Ryan's.
Nobody was there yet, just two empty desks beside me.
Were they really serious? Picking sides? I haven't done that since 3rd when my mom and dad were fighting, jokingly, about whose car was prettier. I chose my Mom's side. Just saying.
Caro strutted down the aisle, set her neon pink backpack on the floor, and fell in her seat.
"Hi Brendon." She smiled a small smile.
"Hello miss." I returned the same I-don't-really-know-what-to-make-of-you-right-now smile.
The room crowded, yet Ryan didn't show up.

RIIINNNNNNNGGGG

"Children, please take out your creative writing stories." Mrs. Warburton intructed.

Ryan's POV

The bell had rung 5 minutes ago. I'm suprised I even showed up to school. I don't need to really even be here. My father doesn't give a fuck, so why should I?
I walked down the hallway, seeing as though I'm not the only one late.
There was a short girl, about 4'8, wandering the halls. Her hair was dark red, and she was wearing lime green skinnies with a long white shirt that said 'I start iPod Parties at the grocery store' and pink converse. She looked awful lost.
"Need some help?" I walked up to her.
"Yeah, if you don't mind. I'm Crystal. I was wondering where Mrs. Warburton's room is. I'm new and this school is huge, I'm a tad bit confused." She said, shyly.
"Well, I'm Ryan, and I'm going to Warburton's right now, so just follow me."
She nodded and we walked over to reading.

I walked into class during some type of porn reciting because Alex Gaskarth was sitting in his little corner, reading "HE TOOK OFF HIS PANTALONES AND THRUSTED!!" off of a piece of paper, in a very animated fashion.
WHOA.
"THANK YOU ALEXANDER! THANK YOU! We've heard enough," Mrs. Warburton pleaded, "and besides, our new student,
Crystal has arrived! And Mr. Ross, you are late..... again." She took out her little attendance book and wrote in it.
I looked over at Crystal, who looked quite scared.
"Where do I sit?"
"Take a seat over by Brendon and Carolyn, next to Ryan. He'll walk you back there."
I walked over to my chair, and met eyes with Caro. They were empty. I looked down, and avoided looking at her again.
A folded piece of paper flew on my desk from behind me.
We need to talk was written in Caro's handwriting.
I turned around, and raised an eyebrow.
"Please?" She gave me her puppy-dog eyes.
'Fine' I mouthed

That was about the longest period of my life.
"Hey Ryan, I really need a favor from you!" Brendon caught my arm on the way out the door.
"Yeah, whats up man?"
Brendon had been one of the those friends who were just really sincere and loyal, I appericiated his friendship. We had become really close.
"Can you give me a ride to Red Rock on Friday?"
"Sure, what's the occasion?"
"Gotta date." He said childishly, with an idiotic grin on his face.
"Oh Jesus."
"Yeaaaahhhhh."
"But, yeah, sure. Friday, Red Rock, I'll give you a ride."
"AHHH! Thank you!"
"No problemo."

Friday

This week has been quite the fucking horrible one.
Monday, I left my phone in my pants, and put through the washing machine, and then I accidently ran it over with my car. Tuesday, I was ridiculed at school for slits on my wrist and basically my whole appearence. There was no reasoning for this, everybody just decided they were goingo to mock me. Wensday, my guitar was stolen out of the guitar room. Thursday, my father had pelted a beer bottled at my head. Luckily, he missed. Today. I'm scared for today.

I walked into the quad at 7:30, early for school.
I didn't feel like being at home. It was dangerous.
I don't know why I didn't just move out.
I kept telling myself 'one day it'll stop'.
But I know I'm just lying to myself.

"Ryannn." Slurred a voice.
I turned around to see Caro in her usual attire.
Purple skinnies, a white V-neck and black converse. Her black hair pin straight.
"Morning."
"Hey, can we talk now?"
"Go ahead." I shrugged.
"I didn't mean to hurt you."
"Haven't we established that yet? That you didn't mean to hurt me. Just cut the crap. Get to the point."
"Ryan, I'm still in love with you." She said, quietly.
Whhhhaaaa?
"I love you, but I love him at the same time." She added.
"I am so confused."
"I just want things to be okay between us."
I don't even get this. I gave her a confused stare.
"I don't want to lose you."
"What would I be losing myself to?"
"Just listen to me, Ryan. I love you. I. Love. You. But I love him also. I love him differently. He makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Thats what I was missing. He gives me those thrills, that doesn't really exsist between us anyone."
What? I fucking loved her more than anything else out there. And she just put on an act, to be nice?
"So what you're saying is, you love me, but you don't love me like that. You still love me, and want to be friends." I tried to sort out her words.
"Exactly." She sighed.
"So you've lied to me all this time?" I harshened my tone.
"What? No!"
"You pretending like you liked me."
"No! Well, yea kinda, but in reality, no. I started out, head over heals for you, but then, we kinda lost our spark. So, technially I haven't been lying, but kinda sorta yea. " She said, moving her hands around, in a very animated fashion.
"What?"
"WHAT!?"
"Carolyn, its too confusing to be your friend." I said coldly, and walked away.

end of the day
Today was the most hellish day I have ever endured, ever, and my morning quarell was the start of it.
First period, my teacher critized my history paper, out loud. In fact, I was the example of what not to do. Then the I got held up but the gangsta kids. I was shoved into the lockers while one kid took my ipod, and threw it in the garbage (but I still got it back) and the other kids pantsed me. Everybody laughed. Then during lunch, Oli accidently spilled tomato juice all over my white jeans. There were many jokes about how I had my period, then the jokes got all serious, and it got turned into a rumor. By the end of the day, everybody had decided that I was a tranny.

My dad came home from 'work' (work meaning going to a casino, and getting fucked up.) with his whore and her whore's mistake [her child]. I had been working on dinner for them. Apprently they wanted ham, which takes quite a long time to make.
"RYAN, I'M HOME!" He shouted, from around the corner, in the living room.
"No shit sherlock." I mummbled.
I was so tempted to spike the punch. Oh so tempted.
"RYAN! WHAT THE HELL ARE THESE GRADES?!" He stormed into the kitchen, beer can in hand, holding my report card.
On normal days, when he wasn't drunk, he wouldn't give a fuck about my grades. On drunken days, he would find some reason to get mad a me. I don't know how these things work.
"Sorry." I mummbled as I stirred a mixture of milk.
"There's no sorry in this house hold! You fucking get it right, or go fucking die in a hole. We don't need you, this worthless piece of shit, here! You're the reason why your mother left. Fuck you. We don't need your fucking food. We're better of eating at 7/11, you fag." He spat at me, ruthlessly, and stompted out of the house bringing his 'family' with him.
I pushed all the ingredients off of the counter, all of them crashing, and breaking into a million different pieces.
"I really have no fucking purpose of being here." I said to myself.
Its true. Nobody wants me here, nobody needs me. I hate being here. I might as well leave.
I know he was drunk, but he meant every word of it. I laughed at how right I was.

I rushed into my father's bathroom, and opened the mecidine cabinet, and found the clear orange tube I was looking for.
George Ross. Bipolar I disorder. 3/15/09.
I opened the tube and swallowed all 13 pills.
Ahhaaahhhaa.

I walked over to my room, and sat on my bed.
I looked at the pictures on my dresser. My Mom. She was so beautiful. Her full blonde hair, and dark brown eyes. I really wonder why she left.
I stood up, and paced. Why? Why did this happen to me?
Why did she leave me with this monster? Why didn't she care enough? Why did God do this to me?
Why doesn't anybody care? Nobody gives a fuck about what I do.
I have no one. Nobody that needs me.

I shook my leg. Ahh, thats wierd. I feel all tingly. Like my leg's gonna fall asleep. I lifted up my loose pants to see if I had done anything to it. Nothing. But for some odd reason, I have goosebumps everywhere.
It sure is chilly.
No. Its fucking freezing.
Thats wierd. Why is my-

Brendon's POV

I kissed my mom on the cheek before I left for Ry's house, so she wouldn't get all pissy about me being a 'bad son'. But I wasn't gonna tell her about Hagen, because she would probably track Hagen down, and interogate her.
I found Ryan's plain white house, with no car in front of it, which means his dad wasn't home.
I knocked on the door.
And knocked again.
Thats wierd, he told me to come over at 6:45 for a ride, and its 6:45.
I turned the door knob, and opened the door. That's wierd. The door was unlocked, and nobody seemed to be home. I let myself inside. Entering the kitchen, there was food and glass all over the floor.
I'm a little scared. Door unlocked, glass everywhere, the vacancy.
Maybe Ry's in his room, and didn't here me knock.
I made my way to his room.
Where the fuck could he be? Selfish little brat probably forgot. Damn.
I trusted him to-

Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
I turned the corner to find Ryan on the floor, knocked out cold.
Oh God. This isn't good. Oh fuck. Fuck. Fuck. What do I do? What do I do?!?!!!?!?!?
He was lying on the hardwood floor, his skin as cold and pale as ever, with barely any pulse. It didn't look like he got stabbed or hit or anything like that.
"RYAN! Ryan! Please, get up! Ryan!! Can you hear me?! RYAN!!! Oh God." I took his hand in mine and shook it, in attempt to wake him up.
I pulled out my phone and dialed 911.
"911, what's you're emergency?" A bored voice answered.
"Hi, yeah, my friend is on the floor here, nearly dead, please send help fast!!!" I panicked, barely understandable.
"Help should be there soon." The voice said in the same bored tone. I hung up, and shook Ryan even more.
"RYAN! PLEASE! PLEASE, STAY WITH ME HERE! COME ON BUDDY! STAY WITH ME!" I pleaded desperatley.
He moaned only slightly, and gagged a bit. Then he went back into his silent state.
I started to panic. Screaming for help, screaming for mercy.
In a matter of minutes the paramedics bursted through the room.
They took his blood pressure and pulse, and moved him into the infamous white and red car.
I stood at his side the whole time. I sat by him on the way to the hospital, crying silently.
He wasn't responding to anything they were doing.

We arived at the hospital, and the back door flung open.
"GO!" shouted a paramedic as they rushed my friend out of the car.
I followed them into the ER, before I hit the waiting room, where I had to, well, wait.
"Name?" asked the pretty blonde lady at the register.
"Bren-don-on Urie." I studdered.
"Mkay. Well let you know when he'll be visitable.... if that's even a word." She giggled childishly. I rolled my eyes and sat down in a wooden uncomfortable chair.

How did this even happen? Did his dad do something? Did somebody else do something? Did he cause this?
These are all quesions I fear would not be answered.

five minutes later

"OKAY, HOLY FUCK! WHERE'S RYAN?!?!!?" Paige yelled as she entered the waiting room full of children, with Hagen and Kyle following her.
I had texted Hagen about Ryan, and I guess she couldn't keep the 'secret'.
"Shhh. He's in the ER, apperently being intubated. He has no gag reflex." I said as calmly as possible.
"Okay. Start from the beggining. What the hell happened to him?" Kyle asked.
"I went into his house, and BAM, he was on the floor knocked out."
"Wait, what?!" He gaped dramatically.
"Yeah, I have no clue what happened, but he was on the floor, his heart beating uber slow."
"OhmyGod. I hope he's all right." Hagen added quietly.
"I hope so too."

three hours later

We were let into Ryan's room, were he slept, oh so peacefully.
A little too peacefully, to the point where he was in a coma.
Apperently, he had an overdose of Seroquel, found in medication that I can't remember the names of.
Suicide, maybe?
I don't know. It's all one big blur to me.
By this time Caro, William, Spencer, Oli and Adam, had made it over to the hospital.
Carolyn biting her nails ferociously while mumbling 'this is all my fault', over and over again, Hagen poofing her hair every two seconds, (bwhahahahaha.... you know that's what you would be doing. don't even try to deny it.), Kyle, Adam and Paige wandering around the food court, Oli tracing over his tatoos, Spencer drumming with the hospital pens, William reading Alternative Press, and me, just staring at Ryan, hoping for a miracle.

The nurse walked into the room, checking on the monitors.
I walked over to her, curiously.
"How's he doing?" I asked innocently.
"We aren't measuring much brain waves. God knows how long he could be in this state." She sighed.
"Is he gonna die?" William asked. Caro elbowed him, giving him that don't-even-think-like-that stare. He shrugged.
"Well son, death is gonna catch up to all one day, his just may be coming faster than ours." The nurse too down the monitor readings, and left the room.

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What I do for you people....
Looking up suicide stories, and reading most of them. I wasn't sure how to have him go about the whole suicide thing, because I don't know shit about suicide, so I looked up stories about it, and it was about the most disturbing thing ever. I have never read about so much cutting and blood in my life. shivers

I feel like EVERY story I read has a hospital scene.
WHY AM I SO LATE?!!?!?

im supposed to be asleep but just a general note for all of my reviewers:
THANK YOU FOR ALL THE COMPLIMENTS!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!1!!!1!! :]
You guys make up for my crappy life conditions at this moment in time.

NIGHT.