FicWad

Monday



“Pete! Hey, PETE!” Pete sighed and watched his best friend Patrick run breathlessly down the dorms front stairs, his face beet red, and his hat askew. “Pete, you- you’ll NEVER guess what’s happened!”
Pete had been head of the fraternity for two months, and already he was tired of hearing everyone’s complaints and problems. Couldn’t they leave him alone for a day?
“What is it this time Trick? Did Gabe and Will get bored and write nasty things on you while you were sleeping…. Again?”
Patrick stopped before his best friend and blushed ferociously, that had been one time!
“No! Pete it-“
“Is it Brendon then? Patrick. Did he…. Did he find the Red Bull?” Pete’s voice was a fearful whisper; bad things happened when Brenny found the Red Bull.
“No, he didn’t!” Patrick answered, “Well… actually yes he did, and he’s upstairs singing show tunes and taking his bed apart. But that’s not it! Pet-“
“Joe and Andy then? Trick, are they doing naughty things to each other in the upstairs bathroom? Because I swear, I won’t stand for that kind of behave-”
“NO PETE! It’s girls!”
“Wha..” Pete’s eyes were wide “Girls? As in, new girls!? Patrick! Why didn’t you say something before?”

“I-I tried…..” Patrick mumbled, but Pete was already running towards the living room, to look across the street through the front window. Patrick followed him, talking the entire time. “Ya Pete, new girls. Five of them, real pretty ones. Ryan and I were playing guitar hero, and we saw them drive up to that new dorm across the street, you know they just finished building? Well for a half hour or so, they’ve been bringing boxes in and out of it so… Pete? D’you think that maybe, um maybe this time one of these girls… do you think they’ll like me?”

Patrick blushed again, and Pete stopped dead. Turning to his best friend, he placed friendly hands onto his shoulders and stared deeply into his eyes.
“Patrick, upon my honor as head of this fraternity, and as your friend; I swear that this time we will get you laid.”
“AWESOME!” A unified shout came from behind Pete, and both boys turned to see Gabe and William skipping down the hallway. “We’re gonna get Tricky a chicky?”
They skipped to Patrick’s side, and slung their arms over his shoulders. “But how are we gonna do that?” Gabe asked, and Will continued, “Ya Pete, we already know that none of the girls in this school want to bed Tricky here…”
“He’s too much of a good boy for his own good.” Gabe finished the thought, pinching Patrick’s cheek.
“Well that’s the thing boy’s; none of the girls in this school would have sex with Patrick.”
“Thanks.” Patrick mumbled, but Pete continued, pretending not to have heard him. “BUT, Trick here tells me..” He leaned towards Gabe and William secretly… “That he and Ryro spotted some fresh meat.” He raised his eyebrows suggestively and straightened.
“NEW GIRLS?!”
“NO WAY. THAT’S-“
“AWESOME!”
They ran towards the living room. Pete heard a crash! And a “Hey!” as they shoved Ryan away from the window to get a peek at the girls. Pete chuckled and began walking again. Reaching the dorm’s stairs he stopped, and decided to call down the rest of the guy’s. So he shouted:
“HEY!! GET YOUR ASSES DOWN HERE EVERYBODY! EMERGENCY FRATERNINTY MEETING, NEW HOTTIES ACROSS THE STREET!”
“Who needs girls?” Joe called back, and Andy giggled, then moaned.
“Oh gross guys! Can’t you lay off each other for like, ten minutes….?
“Nope!” This time Andy answered Pete, and Joe giggled.
“Just…get your asses down here NOW!”
“Fine,” Joe sighed, and Pete could hear them shuffling to get dressed.
“Brendon? You coming?” He called up the stairs, regretting it once he remembered Patrick’s warning.
“YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS” Pete rolled his eyes as Brendon sang in a girly falsetto. Patrick had been right, Bren had found the Red Bull. Pete watched apprehensive, as he appeared at the top of the stairs.

Six empty cans of red bull were hanging from a string around Brendon's neck. A pair of blue and black checkered boxers were perched on top of his head, and a short wooden bedpost was clutched tightly in his hand.
Brendon waved the bedpost madly above his head, and began to march down the stairs, singing at the top of his lungs.
“They tried to hiiiide it, oh yes they did, the fiends, they tried to hide my Redbull!! But I found it ohhhhhhhhh yes, Underneath Tricky’s beeeeeeeeddd I found it! Now there is underwear on my head, and New girls are heeeeeeeerrrreeee! Girls, girls…hot ones I say! They’re here todayyyyy! Hot girls, long hair, I’d like to see their underweaaaaarrrrrrrrrrr!” He held the last note for a ridiculously long time, spinning in dizzy circles around Pete, then skipped into the living room, still waving the bedpost over his head.
Soon Andy and Joe came down the stairs, hand in hand. Pete looked up at them, made a quick gagging motion, laughed, then pranced into the living room himself. He pushed his way to the front of the boys crowded around the window, and got his first glimpse of the new girls.
There were five of them, like Patrick had said, and they were FINE! One especially caught his eyes, a tall slender blonde, with long wavy hair and a beautiful white sundress. She was cute. Another one sparked his interest as well, but not for himself. She was short, very short, even in heels. And she wasn’t too skinny either. She had just enough meat on her bones to give her a cute butt and some nice boobs. Plus there was none of that pencil legged if she runs they’ll break syndrome that Pete hated so much.

She had very dark, shiny hair, shoulder length, with side bangs that didn’t cover her eyes, and pretty glasses that did. “She looks smart.” He whispered “She looks like Patrick’s type.”
The rest of the girls were a mix. There was a stick thin Redhead, obviously Irish. Another was a dark skinned girl, very tall, with a rockin body and the longest legs he had ever seen. The last girl was Asian, and most Asian girls were pretty. She wasn’t too short, or too tall, slender with clear skin and only slightly slanted eyes. Pete knew that Brendon had a thing for Asian girls, and by the looks of that girl’s hair, dyed 15 different colors, she obviously had Brendon’s personality.
When the girls disappeared into the dorm, carrying the last few boxes out of the car; most of the boy’s whistled appreciatively and groaned. Pete cleared his throat.
“Well boy’s one of us is going to go over there, and introduce themselves to those girls, make us look good. Who wants to do it?”
Immediately Will and Gabe raised their hands, bouncing up and down excitedly. Pete laughed.
“Not you two, you’re too forward with the ladies, you’d probably end up smacking one of their butts, or insulting them, and then where would we be? They’d never talk to us again. Besides…I need you two to help me plan their welcome.” Pete’s eyes sparkled mischievously, and he chuckled darkly. Every newcomer was 'welcomed' to the school by Pete and his fraternity; it was a sort of tradition… or hazing.

But they were the best, and everyone expected it, except the new students of course.
“How about you Tricky?”
Patrick looked up from his converse, alarmed.
“W-what me? Really? Guys….I don’t know.... I’d screw it up, I’m no goo-“
“I'LL DO IT!” Brendon stood up, the cans around his neck clanking together, as he raised the bed post above his head. Everyone stared. Brendon didn’t notice.
“See, I’ll use this magical golden scepter, to cast a spell over them, and then they’ll think I’m a wonderful gingerbread man, and they will love me, and they will follow me back to this wonderful land of gingerbread. And then if they don’t fall in love with us, my magical scepter will make them choke on cat’s!”
“Brendon…..no. That won’t work honey.”
Brendon nodded seriously, “I suppose you’re right Pete, the magic of the scepter is a dangerous thing, what if it turned them all into goldfish?”
“Brendon, you don’t have a magical scepter, and it can’t change people into goldfish.”


“YOU ARE SO WRONG PETE! Watch this!” He waved the bedpost over Patrick’s head and mumbled a few words of choice gibberish. When he lowered the bedpost, he turned triumphantly to Pete. “See? Patrick is now a goldfish!” His smile faded and his eyes widened. “OHMYGOD PATRICK IS A GOLDFISH!” He screamed and ran around the living room. “SOMEBODY HELP HIM! PATRICK IS A GOLDFISH, PATRICK, SOMEBODY SAVE HIM, GET WATER!! WAIT, I’LL GO GET HIM WATER. NOBODY. STEP. ON. HIM.” Brendon ran from the living room, into the kitchen.
“Right……..Well Patrick, will you go?”
“I-I- guys come on don’t make me…”
“Please Patrick?” Ryan spoke up. “You’re cute, sweet, nice, those girls will melt for you like butter in a pan. Besides, all you’d have to do is introduce yourself, and get a little information on them, names personalities.”
“F-fine, I-I guess I’ll do it.” Everyone cheered, then went silent as Brendon ran back into the room, screaming about goldfish. He had a tall glass of water in his hand, and threw it at Patrick. “THIS WILL SAVE YOU, MY LITTLE GOLDFISH FRIEND!!” Not expecting it, Patrick didn't try to stop the glass, and it him in the head. He fell out of his chair, landing unconscious on the floor. Everyone gathered around his body, and Brendon said proudly,
“See? The water worked, Patrick isn’t a goldfish anymore!”
“Dear god Brendon I think you killed him!” Will and Gabe said seriously, and Brendon started to cry.
“I- I did? I killed the goldfish.... B-but no….I saved his life!”
“Brendon, go upstairs, and think about what you did to Patrick.” Pete crossed his arms and glared at his high-on-Red Bull friend.


“I HURT MY GOLDFISH!!” Brendon sobbed and ran up the stairs.

“So….is Patrick dead?”
“Shut up Gabe. He isn’t dead.”
“Well I was just asking…”
“SHUT UP GABE!”
Pete kneeled next to his friend and tapped him on the shoulder.
“Tricky? Hey Tricky are you okay?” When Patrick didn’t move, Pete scooped up the glass, Brendon had gotten from the kitchen, which was still had a little water left in it. He poured the water over Patrick’s head, and everyone leaned in as his eyelids started to flutter.
“Patrick?”
Ryan gasped as Patrick started to jerk violently, gasping and grabbing his throat with his hands.
“Guys, guy’s help me, I can’t breathe, I-I need water, this air could kill a goldfish like me!”
“Patrick has-“
“Gone Crazy!” Will and Gabe said helpfully. Pete glared at them, then turned back to his friend.
“Patrick? A-are you OK?”
“No! P-Pete Pete I’m gasp dying! please Gasp get me some water! I can’t gasp breathe this air!”

Pete sighed, that glass of water must have hit him pretty hard.
“Patrick, listen to me, you’re not a goldfish.”


Patrick was now desperately pumping his arms, trying to swim to the bathroom.


“Y-Yes I am Pete! gasp Brendon made gasp me one! With black magic gasp And now I’m going to die gasp unless you get me to gasp some water!”

“Hey Patrick, if you’re a goldfish, how’re you talking to us?” Andy shouted from the couch, where he was sitting on Joe’s lap.
“What? I’m not talking gasp I’m a goldfish. And I’m dying!”
Pete sighed, that glass of water must have hit him REALLY hard.
“Alright guys, it looks like Tricky is a little delusional. Somebody go and turn on the bathtub.” Ryan ran from the room, and Pete waited until he heard the water start before turning to William and Gabe.
“Okay, you two grab his feet, I’ll take his head. He wants water? Let’s go give him his water.”
Together the three boy’s hefted Patrick up, and carried him into the bathroom.

SPLAH

They dumped him, fully clothed into the Bathtub. Soaking wet and grumpy, everyone watched him swim round happily for a few minutes.
“So Patrick, are you okay now?” Pete grumbled and Patrick looked up,
“Yes guys, thank you for saving me, I don’t know how much longer I could have survived in that air……..oh.”
Looking up at all his friends, crowded in to the bathroom, realization crept into Patrick’s eyes. “Oh. I-I’m not a goldfish, am I?” He blushed scarlet, stopped swimming and sat up in the bathtub.
“Oh. Umm…Ha sorry…..” Pete glared at him and Patrick looked down.
“Patrickl!! I’m so sorry I turned you into a goldfish!” Brendon screamed, running into the bathroom.
Still sobbing, he climbed into the tub next to Patrick, and gave him a hug.
“It was the magical scepter that did it; I’ll never use its power again.” Brendon took the bedpost from his back pocket and threw it away from them. It bounced off the back of the toilet, and hit Ryan in the head. He crumpled to the floor.
DAMMIT BRENDON!” Pete yelled, “New dorm rule, nobody is to ever, ever, EVER BRING REDBULL INTO THIS HOUSE AGAIN!”
Ryan raised a feeble hand and groaned “Agreed.” Brendon started to cry harder.

~~~~~~~
Later.

Patrick glanced out the window, to the dark night, the stars, and to the dark shadows moving inside the lit windows of the dorm across the street. Then he turned back to his friends.
“Guys I’m not going tonight, I swear. You can’t make me. It’s late; they’re probably all in their pajamas …or those creepy gooey facial masks. Nope I don’t want to see them like that thank you.”
He crossed his arms in finality and turned towards the T.V. pretending to be absorbed in the Ugly teenage girl that was singing on screen.
“You know what?” William called from the couch.
“I say we send Brendon with his magical scepter” Gabe called from next to him
“It worked on Patrick anyway.” Will finished.
Patrick flushed, embarrassed.
Brendon stood up. “I’LL DO IT!” He sat down quickly when Pete glared evilly at him.
“No, Patrick is right guys, we should wait until tomorrow, those girls probably have no makeup, and messed up hair… who wants to see girls when they look like that?”
All the boys nodded seriously, and Andy shuddered, “Who wants to see girls at all?”
“I Love you Andy.” Joe laughed and scooped him into a kiss, the other boys groaned.
“So tomorrow?” Ryan said, trying to distract them all from the make-out session.
“Tomorrow.”

Patrick gulped

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Longest chapter I have ever written for anything!! WOOT WOOT! three cheers for a Brendon on sugar high!

This was fun to write, I was rolling on the floor laughing at myself, which is probably strange but hey, I’ve said it before, the stuff I write is new to me too

Oh and If you guys have read any of my other stuff, then you know I’m a huge fan of Jandy, or Andoe, or whatever. Joe and Andy okay? So they’ll probably show up in most of my stories :)

Rate and Review guys!

Tuesday will come sooooooon I think.