Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > You Told Me This Gets Harder
Lauren P.O.V
When we got to the club, the guys went out the back to get ready and stuff, so it was me, Lyn-z, Alicia, Krista and Katelyn at the bar. It was nice seeing Krista and Katelyn again. I haven't seen or spoken to them since the day I left.
"It's great seeing you again Lauren, Mikey told us what happened, we're really sorry." Krista said with a sympathetic look on her face.
"Oh it's okay really, actually me and Gerard are friends again, so it's all good." I said with a smile.
"Erm...Lauren can me and Jamia speak to you please?" I nodded and went with them to the bathroom.
"What's up?" I asked, confused.
"Why are you and Gerard friends all of a sudden. You hated him before your..."
"Suicide attempt?"
"Yeah, that."
"Well, we talked things over when I got out of hospital. It's all fine now. We can finally be friends again."
"Yeah, but that's not what you want though is it?" Jamia asked. She knew something, but I wasn't going to give it away that easily.
"How do you mean?"
"Lauren! It's clear that you're still in love with the guy! Why though? He cheated on you and tried to kill you --"
"How did you know about that?" I must of gone pale. I felt sick that someone knew. I really hoped they wouldn't say anything.
"I saw him stab you. I can't believe you still love him after he did that. And before that, he hit you during your fight." Alicia said.
"Please don't say anything to anyone, please Alicia." I begged.
She shook her head. "Of course I won't."
"But, Lauren, why why do you still love him? After all the shit he put you through." Said Jamia. She sounded angry. Why is she angry? I can love who the fuck I want.
"I'm sorry guys, but you don't feel what I feel. I can't just give up on someone just because they hurt me --"
"Yeah, but he's married now! You can't have him anymore."
"No. I will not let Lyn-z win. Yeah, she's a nice person, but...she's with the person I love. I'm sorry but I can't change my feelings just 'cos you don't like it."
Just then a door unlocked in the bathroom and someone walked out. I turned round to see someone I didn't want to hear our conversation.
Lyn-z.
She looked as if she was about to cry. She was shaking as well.
"Lyn-z, hey, erm...how much did you hear?" I asked stupidly, knwoing she heard all of it.
"Is it true Lauren? He, my husband, Gerard, tried to kill you? And...you still love him?" She was crying now. I felt so bad. She was such a nice person.
"All of what you heard is true. I'm sorry Lyn-z."
"No. I guess I saw it coming. You loving him I mean, not the murder attempt --"
"He didn't do it on purpose Lyn-z. I would of died if he hadn't done something. I didn't believe it before, but I do now."
Lyn-z started to...laugh. I looked at her confused. "What's so funny?"
"You said you're not gonna let me win. I'm sorry Lauren but you are not taking my husband. He's mine and there is nothing you can do about that!"
I shook my head and started laughing also. "That's where you're wrong. Would Gerard still be with you if he found out that you knew about me being pregnant? Would he still be with you if he found out that you lied to him?"
Her smirk faded. "You wouldn't tell him."
"Oh wouldn't I? If you don't tell him, Lyn-z, I will!" Then I stormed out of the bathroom and went to look for the guys out the back.
When I found them, I saw them getting ready and having their make-up put on.
"Hey guys, how's it going?"
"Oh hey Lauren, everything is going fine. We're really excited about doing this. It's been ages since we played at a club instead of at a stadium. It feels good." Mikey laughed. I laughed too.
"I'm glad you're not nervous. How can you not be nervous? I'd be having a heart attack by now. Knowing that I was gonna play infront of loads of people."
"Well, I guess that if you've played quite a lot, you don't get nervous any more." Replied Gerard. I stared in his beautiful hazel eyes again. I had to look away, but I couldn't. He was just so...amazing.
"Hello...earth to Lauren? Hey, are you in?" Frank was clicking his fingers infront of my face.
"What?" I asked annoyed.
"You were doing that staring thing again."
"What staring thing?" I looked at my feet and blushed. Oh my god, other people knew I was looking at Gerard. This is not good.
Frank laughed and put an arm around my shoulder and went back to stand infront of the stage and waited for the guys to get their stuff ready.
Alicia and Jamia came and joined me a little while after.
"We're sorry Lauren, we should be supportive about your decisons, not throw it back in your face." Said Jamia.
"Thank you." I said, and we hugged. When we were done. The guys were on stage with everything ready. And Gerard spoke in the microphone.
Gerard P.O.V
When we were in the changing room. I answered something that Lauren had asked. Something about being nervous.
After I answered her, she stared right into my eyes. I stared back. I love her eyes. They are so beautiful. That is one thing I miss about her. The way she stares.
Stop it Gerard. Maybe tomorrow you'll think straight.
When we got on stage, I saw Lauren in the front row. I stopped to look at her again. She didn't see me because she was talking to Jamia and Alicia.
I then went over to the microphone.
Lauren P.O.V
"We are My Chemical Romance!" He yelled. Everyone screamed in reply. Even I did. I loved these guys and I was gonna enjoy myself.
"Alright, it's great to be here! Okay we're gonna start off with a new song. It's called 'It's Not A Fashion Statement, It's A Fucking Deathwish!'"
Everyone cheered again and they started playing. Shit! This song was amazing. The words were so well written!
As he sung part of the song. He didn't take his eyes off me.
"We never got that far,
This helps me think all through the night,
Bright lights that, won't kill me now,
Or tell me how,
Just you and I, your starless eyes remain."
I couldn't help but think that part was about me. About how we never got far in our relationship.
They song most of the songs off I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love including Our Lady Of Sorrow, Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For The Two Of Us and Demolition Lovers.
They sung new songs like Helena, You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison and Thank You For The Venom. It was amazing.
But all the way through Demolition Lovers, Gerard never once took his eyes from mine. For six whole minutes the song was, our eyes were locked. I'm not sure, but I don't think either of us blinked. I loved it. I wondered if that song was for me. Even though he said it was for Lyn-z, he never looked at her. I wonder...
Gerard P.O.V
I stared at her the whole time. I couldn't look away, she looked so beautiful from where I was.
"Dude, what the fuck were you doing!?" Yelled Frank.
Now my ear hurt. "What? What did I do?"
"Staring at your ex! Come on man, you have a wife! You can't be 'eye-balling' your ex-fucking-girlfriend! Unless..."
"Unless what?"
"You're still in love with her."
"What don't be an idiot. She moves away for like six years, she doesn't tell me we have twins together, then we have a huge fight where I almost killed her, and you think I'm still in love with her?"
"You almost killed her?"
Shit! I forgot he didn't know.
"Erm...yeah, it was a total accident and if I didn't do it, she would of killed herself anyway so..."
Frank nodded, understanding and didn't say anymore about it.
"Okay, but yeah, I do think you love her, no matter what has happened between you two. You fell in love so young and so quickly, that it's never gonna go away."
"Yeah, you're right, you're absolutly right. I am..."
Oh my god I can't believe I'm admitting this to myself and Frank.
"I am still, and proberbly always will be, in love with Lauren."
"There you go, dude! Now what are you gonna do?"
"I don't know, I guess, I'm gonna have to tell Lauren how I feel and hope she feels the same. Or I can break up with Lyn-z and then tell Lauren."
"But what if you break up with Lyn-z, tell Lauren how you feel and she doesn't feel the same? You're gonna be on your own."
"I know, but I have to do something."
When we got to the club, the guys went out the back to get ready and stuff, so it was me, Lyn-z, Alicia, Krista and Katelyn at the bar. It was nice seeing Krista and Katelyn again. I haven't seen or spoken to them since the day I left.
"It's great seeing you again Lauren, Mikey told us what happened, we're really sorry." Krista said with a sympathetic look on her face.
"Oh it's okay really, actually me and Gerard are friends again, so it's all good." I said with a smile.
"Erm...Lauren can me and Jamia speak to you please?" I nodded and went with them to the bathroom.
"What's up?" I asked, confused.
"Why are you and Gerard friends all of a sudden. You hated him before your..."
"Suicide attempt?"
"Yeah, that."
"Well, we talked things over when I got out of hospital. It's all fine now. We can finally be friends again."
"Yeah, but that's not what you want though is it?" Jamia asked. She knew something, but I wasn't going to give it away that easily.
"How do you mean?"
"Lauren! It's clear that you're still in love with the guy! Why though? He cheated on you and tried to kill you --"
"How did you know about that?" I must of gone pale. I felt sick that someone knew. I really hoped they wouldn't say anything.
"I saw him stab you. I can't believe you still love him after he did that. And before that, he hit you during your fight." Alicia said.
"Please don't say anything to anyone, please Alicia." I begged.
She shook her head. "Of course I won't."
"But, Lauren, why why do you still love him? After all the shit he put you through." Said Jamia. She sounded angry. Why is she angry? I can love who the fuck I want.
"I'm sorry guys, but you don't feel what I feel. I can't just give up on someone just because they hurt me --"
"Yeah, but he's married now! You can't have him anymore."
"No. I will not let Lyn-z win. Yeah, she's a nice person, but...she's with the person I love. I'm sorry but I can't change my feelings just 'cos you don't like it."
Just then a door unlocked in the bathroom and someone walked out. I turned round to see someone I didn't want to hear our conversation.
Lyn-z.
She looked as if she was about to cry. She was shaking as well.
"Lyn-z, hey, erm...how much did you hear?" I asked stupidly, knwoing she heard all of it.
"Is it true Lauren? He, my husband, Gerard, tried to kill you? And...you still love him?" She was crying now. I felt so bad. She was such a nice person.
"All of what you heard is true. I'm sorry Lyn-z."
"No. I guess I saw it coming. You loving him I mean, not the murder attempt --"
"He didn't do it on purpose Lyn-z. I would of died if he hadn't done something. I didn't believe it before, but I do now."
Lyn-z started to...laugh. I looked at her confused. "What's so funny?"
"You said you're not gonna let me win. I'm sorry Lauren but you are not taking my husband. He's mine and there is nothing you can do about that!"
I shook my head and started laughing also. "That's where you're wrong. Would Gerard still be with you if he found out that you knew about me being pregnant? Would he still be with you if he found out that you lied to him?"
Her smirk faded. "You wouldn't tell him."
"Oh wouldn't I? If you don't tell him, Lyn-z, I will!" Then I stormed out of the bathroom and went to look for the guys out the back.
When I found them, I saw them getting ready and having their make-up put on.
"Hey guys, how's it going?"
"Oh hey Lauren, everything is going fine. We're really excited about doing this. It's been ages since we played at a club instead of at a stadium. It feels good." Mikey laughed. I laughed too.
"I'm glad you're not nervous. How can you not be nervous? I'd be having a heart attack by now. Knowing that I was gonna play infront of loads of people."
"Well, I guess that if you've played quite a lot, you don't get nervous any more." Replied Gerard. I stared in his beautiful hazel eyes again. I had to look away, but I couldn't. He was just so...amazing.
"Hello...earth to Lauren? Hey, are you in?" Frank was clicking his fingers infront of my face.
"What?" I asked annoyed.
"You were doing that staring thing again."
"What staring thing?" I looked at my feet and blushed. Oh my god, other people knew I was looking at Gerard. This is not good.
Frank laughed and put an arm around my shoulder and went back to stand infront of the stage and waited for the guys to get their stuff ready.
Alicia and Jamia came and joined me a little while after.
"We're sorry Lauren, we should be supportive about your decisons, not throw it back in your face." Said Jamia.
"Thank you." I said, and we hugged. When we were done. The guys were on stage with everything ready. And Gerard spoke in the microphone.
Gerard P.O.V
When we were in the changing room. I answered something that Lauren had asked. Something about being nervous.
After I answered her, she stared right into my eyes. I stared back. I love her eyes. They are so beautiful. That is one thing I miss about her. The way she stares.
Stop it Gerard. Maybe tomorrow you'll think straight.
When we got on stage, I saw Lauren in the front row. I stopped to look at her again. She didn't see me because she was talking to Jamia and Alicia.
I then went over to the microphone.
Lauren P.O.V
"We are My Chemical Romance!" He yelled. Everyone screamed in reply. Even I did. I loved these guys and I was gonna enjoy myself.
"Alright, it's great to be here! Okay we're gonna start off with a new song. It's called 'It's Not A Fashion Statement, It's A Fucking Deathwish!'"
Everyone cheered again and they started playing. Shit! This song was amazing. The words were so well written!
As he sung part of the song. He didn't take his eyes off me.
"We never got that far,
This helps me think all through the night,
Bright lights that, won't kill me now,
Or tell me how,
Just you and I, your starless eyes remain."
I couldn't help but think that part was about me. About how we never got far in our relationship.
They song most of the songs off I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love including Our Lady Of Sorrow, Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For The Two Of Us and Demolition Lovers.
They sung new songs like Helena, You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison and Thank You For The Venom. It was amazing.
But all the way through Demolition Lovers, Gerard never once took his eyes from mine. For six whole minutes the song was, our eyes were locked. I'm not sure, but I don't think either of us blinked. I loved it. I wondered if that song was for me. Even though he said it was for Lyn-z, he never looked at her. I wonder...
Gerard P.O.V
I stared at her the whole time. I couldn't look away, she looked so beautiful from where I was.
"Dude, what the fuck were you doing!?" Yelled Frank.
Now my ear hurt. "What? What did I do?"
"Staring at your ex! Come on man, you have a wife! You can't be 'eye-balling' your ex-fucking-girlfriend! Unless..."
"Unless what?"
"You're still in love with her."
"What don't be an idiot. She moves away for like six years, she doesn't tell me we have twins together, then we have a huge fight where I almost killed her, and you think I'm still in love with her?"
"You almost killed her?"
Shit! I forgot he didn't know.
"Erm...yeah, it was a total accident and if I didn't do it, she would of killed herself anyway so..."
Frank nodded, understanding and didn't say anymore about it.
"Okay, but yeah, I do think you love her, no matter what has happened between you two. You fell in love so young and so quickly, that it's never gonna go away."
"Yeah, you're right, you're absolutly right. I am..."
Oh my god I can't believe I'm admitting this to myself and Frank.
"I am still, and proberbly always will be, in love with Lauren."
"There you go, dude! Now what are you gonna do?"
"I don't know, I guess, I'm gonna have to tell Lauren how I feel and hope she feels the same. Or I can break up with Lyn-z and then tell Lauren."
"But what if you break up with Lyn-z, tell Lauren how you feel and she doesn't feel the same? You're gonna be on your own."
"I know, but I have to do something."
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