Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Athazagoraphobia
I had left a message with Mikey this morning before I left for the airport. It was a message for Ivy, just in case she went to my house and saw that I wasn't there.
It had been two weeks since I last saw her, and I couldn't wait any longer to get to New Jersey. I had to go without her. I was upset, because I would have liked her with me. She knows everything we went through, she could help me but it was quite clear she didn't want to.
She never did call me. Was she trying to do to me like I had done to her? I hurt her by not calling, or so I've been told, and now she has done the same in not calling me.
But then, maybe this was all too much for her. I had only been back in her life a few days before asking her for help. This is just as confusing for her as it is for me, maybe more. She is probably wondering why I had the procedure in the first place. What had made me even think of something like that?
Maybe I thought I wouldn't see her again, and never remembering her would hurt much, much less than remembering her all the time, and not being able to see her...
I sighed as I walked into the airport. The smell of smoke and coffee filled my nose, and now I needed my two addictions. I ignored my cravings and continued onwards to check in. I headed towards the ridiculouly long line, and stood at the back with my small suitcase.
I wasn't planning on staying long in Jersey. Just a few days. Just to go to this Lacuna place and get my memories back and go back home. But of course, if I had to stay longer, I could always wash my clothes, or buy new stuff.
My eyes kept looking from the front desk to the entrance, in hope of the petite girl walking through.
I seemed weird and somehow impossible that I had thought so much of her in just a few days of meeting her. Was I like this when we first met? Did she think of me like this when we first met? Did she think these things when she saw me sitting with Mikey in Starbucks? These questions, unfortunatly, could not be answered at this moment in time.
Ivy had somehow become an addiction of mine. Making it my third addiction. I felt that when I saw her, I wanted to touch her, to feel her. When she wasn't there, I felt myself going crazy wanting to see her. If she had been stalking me, I would be more than happy. Geez that makes me sound like a creep.
Everything about her amazed me. She seemed like such a strong girl. She doesn't let what happened with us hold her back. If she wants something, goddamn she will get it. I hadn't seen her smile all that much, just once or twice, but I knew this was the thing I like most about her appearence. Her smile. Sure, she was extremely attractive, but her smile is what drew me in more.
She was absolutly, ridiculously beautiful. I could never imagine someone being so beautiful, but she is. I sound like I'm love with her. I couldn't be, could I?
I shook my head of any thoughts of her and stepped forward in the line, still looking to the entrance.
Another half an hour later, and I was finally at the front desk, checking in, and I frowned knowing that Ivy would never have gone to my house, and read the note, and maybe come here.
I was upset, because I thought she may want to help me through this.
I was hurt, because I thought she would understand that we were in this together, and that our feelings for the procedure are the same.
I was angry, because she was being so stubborn about everything we talked about.
And I was scared because I would have to do this alone.
But all thoughts of those feelings were erased from my mind when I saw the breathless young woman looking frantically for me, and smiled widely when she found me.
My heart skipped a beat, as I smiled back.
Ivy's POV.
The awkward silence we were sitting in made me very uncomfortable. I had never been good with silence, no matter what. Gerard was sitting upright in his seat, as if he didn’t want to be here. I couldn’t blame him though.
He looked at me before saying.
“Why did you come?”
“If you remembered me, I wanted to be there with you” I told him.
“You could have called me” He sounded hurt.
“I could of yes, but every time I tried to, I just froze up, Why, I have no idea, but I just couldn’t do it, then when I rang, Mikey told me you had gone, I just didn’t think, I just ran” I explained.
“Oh, I’m glad you came though, I don’t think I can do this without someone by my side” He said.
I looked him straight in the eyes. The hazel colour they were normally had turned into a dark chocolate brown, I’d never really taken into account the colour of his eye’s but I could tell they held every emotion in his body.
He started leaning forward; he was going to kiss me! I turned my head slightly, waiting for his lips to press against mine. But that moment never came, we were interrupted.
“Sir, Madame, there are small children on this plane, please can you not” She said snottily before walking off.
Gerard turned away, but he was too slow, I could still see the faint blush on his pale cheeks. He looked back at me, before we both burst out laughing. Earning glares and stares from almost everyone around us.
Maybe we could go back to normal after all ?
It had been two weeks since I last saw her, and I couldn't wait any longer to get to New Jersey. I had to go without her. I was upset, because I would have liked her with me. She knows everything we went through, she could help me but it was quite clear she didn't want to.
She never did call me. Was she trying to do to me like I had done to her? I hurt her by not calling, or so I've been told, and now she has done the same in not calling me.
But then, maybe this was all too much for her. I had only been back in her life a few days before asking her for help. This is just as confusing for her as it is for me, maybe more. She is probably wondering why I had the procedure in the first place. What had made me even think of something like that?
Maybe I thought I wouldn't see her again, and never remembering her would hurt much, much less than remembering her all the time, and not being able to see her...
I sighed as I walked into the airport. The smell of smoke and coffee filled my nose, and now I needed my two addictions. I ignored my cravings and continued onwards to check in. I headed towards the ridiculouly long line, and stood at the back with my small suitcase.
I wasn't planning on staying long in Jersey. Just a few days. Just to go to this Lacuna place and get my memories back and go back home. But of course, if I had to stay longer, I could always wash my clothes, or buy new stuff.
My eyes kept looking from the front desk to the entrance, in hope of the petite girl walking through.
I seemed weird and somehow impossible that I had thought so much of her in just a few days of meeting her. Was I like this when we first met? Did she think of me like this when we first met? Did she think these things when she saw me sitting with Mikey in Starbucks? These questions, unfortunatly, could not be answered at this moment in time.
Ivy had somehow become an addiction of mine. Making it my third addiction. I felt that when I saw her, I wanted to touch her, to feel her. When she wasn't there, I felt myself going crazy wanting to see her. If she had been stalking me, I would be more than happy. Geez that makes me sound like a creep.
Everything about her amazed me. She seemed like such a strong girl. She doesn't let what happened with us hold her back. If she wants something, goddamn she will get it. I hadn't seen her smile all that much, just once or twice, but I knew this was the thing I like most about her appearence. Her smile. Sure, she was extremely attractive, but her smile is what drew me in more.
She was absolutly, ridiculously beautiful. I could never imagine someone being so beautiful, but she is. I sound like I'm love with her. I couldn't be, could I?
I shook my head of any thoughts of her and stepped forward in the line, still looking to the entrance.
Another half an hour later, and I was finally at the front desk, checking in, and I frowned knowing that Ivy would never have gone to my house, and read the note, and maybe come here.
I was upset, because I thought she may want to help me through this.
I was hurt, because I thought she would understand that we were in this together, and that our feelings for the procedure are the same.
I was angry, because she was being so stubborn about everything we talked about.
And I was scared because I would have to do this alone.
But all thoughts of those feelings were erased from my mind when I saw the breathless young woman looking frantically for me, and smiled widely when she found me.
My heart skipped a beat, as I smiled back.
Ivy's POV.
The awkward silence we were sitting in made me very uncomfortable. I had never been good with silence, no matter what. Gerard was sitting upright in his seat, as if he didn’t want to be here. I couldn’t blame him though.
He looked at me before saying.
“Why did you come?”
“If you remembered me, I wanted to be there with you” I told him.
“You could have called me” He sounded hurt.
“I could of yes, but every time I tried to, I just froze up, Why, I have no idea, but I just couldn’t do it, then when I rang, Mikey told me you had gone, I just didn’t think, I just ran” I explained.
“Oh, I’m glad you came though, I don’t think I can do this without someone by my side” He said.
I looked him straight in the eyes. The hazel colour they were normally had turned into a dark chocolate brown, I’d never really taken into account the colour of his eye’s but I could tell they held every emotion in his body.
He started leaning forward; he was going to kiss me! I turned my head slightly, waiting for his lips to press against mine. But that moment never came, we were interrupted.
“Sir, Madame, there are small children on this plane, please can you not” She said snottily before walking off.
Gerard turned away, but he was too slow, I could still see the faint blush on his pale cheeks. He looked back at me, before we both burst out laughing. Earning glares and stares from almost everyone around us.
Maybe we could go back to normal after all ?
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