FicWad

Three days has past or maybe more I have lost count. I have been lock up in my room I refuse to come out in fear I might see Gerard. I wont nothing to do with him I cannot trust him all my trust that I had is gone forever. One of the doctors came into my room to try to talk to me I ask him if maybe I could go to a different asylum explaining why I wanted to leave, the doctor had no problem with it but gave me a week to really think about. There was no thinking about it I wanted to leave this asylum forever.


I have been crying these last couple of days every time I think I am done crying I once again start to cry. I should not be crying over him but I cannot help it he hurt me. He broke his promise he promise he would never let them take me away that promise did not last long. I was better off without knowing him all he did was break what little trust I had for him. This is why I fear strangers, people say you can trust me but can you really? You cannot trust anyone anymore if you do it always comes back and haunts you.


I have to live with this I have to live with the fact I trusted someone for the first time and now I fear people more then I have before. I knew deep down meeting Gerard as a bad thing I just wish I listen to that feeling but I had to be stupid and hope this would be different that maybe someone out there would never hurt me I guess this is what I get for thinking.


I finally get off my bed I decided it is time for me to go outside to get some fresh air I cannot be lock up in my room forever. I open my door I can still see the damage I did to the door I walk out and close the door behind me. I walk down the hallway slowly I am not in a hurry, before I knew it I was already at the doors that lead to the outside. I open the glass doors and headed out, that is when I saw Gerard sitting on top of the wall.


Its funny how you can be so angry with someone but when you see that person again all your feelings you had come rushing back. I just keep standing there I have no idea what I should do; I could just go back inside and wait for him to leave. I cannot hide from him forever I walk over towards a table and sit down. Part of me is dying to just walk over there but I have to be strong I cannot let this feeling win. I look out of the corner of my eye I see him getting off the wall and walking towards the doors and just like that he leaves.


I should be happy he left I should be happy he respected my wishes and left me alone but all of that would be a lie. I am not happy I am sad I feel like crying I feel like running after him and saying sorry . I am torn of what I should really do I should just leave this asylum and forget all about him, but part of me still cannot let go of him. Maybe leaving this place is for the best I just need to move on and just go back to the way I was before.




Will update again