Categories > Games > Devil May Cry > Cat Nip II

It's hillbilly hell, save me!

by Devilcest 0 reviews

Being a half demon half feline had become, with only some reluctance, second nature for Nero. But damn, why did it keep getting weirder along the way? Was there no end to the seemingly random effec...

Category: Devil May Cry - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama,Humor,Romance - Characters: Dante - Warnings: [V] - Published: 2010-06-28 - Updated: 2010-06-29 - 1798 words

A/N Yo, welcome back! So sorry for the long wait, but after posting that authors note before I started on this chapter then went to bed. When I woke up to continue I couldn't find my USB, which has ALL of my work on it. So I turned my room upside down in my hectic search for it, I only just found it so please forgive me!

I do not own DMC! I do however own the plot and any OC's!

Warnings for this chapter: Swearing, violence, blood/gore, OOC'ness, cuteness and maybe some yaoi smut...MAYBE!


"Oh how the mighty have fallen." Dante just dropped his hands from their frantic waving motions and grumbled.

"What ever, I'll just have to keep myself company while you skip off and cheat on me with that old ladies cat." Anything else Dante wanted to say was cut off by the sudden appearance of Pandora dropping to his eye level, it's current form being something that made Rocket Launcher look like a BB-Gun.

A heartbeat later the street was filled with the tell tail flashes and explosions of a devil getting his ass handed to him by a very angry feline/devil hybrid...

Mission 4: It's Hill Billy hell, SAVE ME!

If there was one thing Nero hated, it was being stuck in a car with a sex deprived Dante. It wasn't being with Dante that he hated, hell no he enjoyed spending time with the elder, but when he was on a roll of bitching and moaning it was like...well, he'd rather not have to deal with it, simple as that. They'd been on the road for the better half of three hours so far, and in that time Dante had done nothing but talk. It started as a simple light conversation, to teasing, to getting bashed while trying not to crash, to complaining, to moaning about being abused, then finally, whistling some random happy assed tune that made Nero's sensitive ears ring.

He swore it sounded like something from the Wizard of OZ, but he wasn't going to admit he might be right, considering...well...lets just say he'd been forced to watch the damn movie under pain of castration. It'd been that time of month for Kyrie, and when she wanted to watch something...they watched something... He couldn't help but shudder at the memory, and Dante wasn't helping with his damn whistling. So yeah, three hours stuck in a car with Dante, on their way to that off the map town. The mission was simple.

Swoop in, kill some devils, bash some inbred idiots, blow something up then get the hell outta dodge.

They weren't even there yet and he was already bored with it...

"Come on kid, stop being such a mood killer." Nero rolled his eyes as he folded his arms and leaned back into his seat.

"You know I hate travelling." Dante snorted and clapped a hand on Nero's thigh, ignoring the hiss that followed.

"Yeah well name me something you don't hate doing. The only things I can think of are abusing me, work outs, and taking cat naps-oof! Now ya see that right there? You get off on causing me pain don't ya?" Nero snorted as he shifted his arms behind his head. His current position being propped up against the door with his legs stretched across the middle of the car to rest on Dante's lap. One of his legs had lifted to smack the other after his crack at his sleeping habits...

And if that hand didn't stop creeping up his leg he'd cut it off!

- 1 Hour later, Mission destination -

Nero sighed in relief as he pulled himself out of Dante's red Chevy Impala (Stole it from Supernatural MWUAHAHAHA!) a smirk lighting his features when he saw Dante nursing an already healing broken wrist. "Serves you right for trying to cop a feel while driving. Seriously Dante, you've already got a few D.U.I's, what else do you need, a few D.W.M's?" Dante raised a brow as he leaned on the cars hood, his hand fully healed as he pulled out Ivory for a quick check up.

"What the hell does D.W.M stand for?" Nero smirked as he retrieved Red Queen from the boot, also grabbing Rebellion only to throw it at Dante, who caught it easily with a wiggle of his brows.

"Driving While Molesting." Dante pouted as he placed Rebellion in it's place on his back.

"But did you have to break my wrist? Honestly a simple, 'back off' or 'pull up first' would have sufficed." Nero raised a brow.

"Pull up first? For what, your hourly medication?" Dante gave a sarcastic laugh and flipped him off, Nero merely grinned and checked Blue Rose while Dante locked the car up. When the elder nodded he holstered his trusty fire arm and followed the other down the road that led into the small town. They'd hidden the car in the surrounding forest to protect it from nosey towns folk who might get curious.

Nero's ears twitched as they entered the front gate of the town, a rusted away welcome sign dangeling precariously above their heads. He squinted slightly to try and make out the lettering on the weather eaten sign and raised a brow at what it said.

Velcome to hell please d i e slowly

He couldn't help but snort at that, some of the letters had been ground off by the weather, as it was meant to say.

Welcome to Wenhella please drive slowly

Honestly it was either coincidence or these people really were crazy. That aside, the narrow road that wound through the old town looked nothing but hazardous. Good thing Dante had enough sense to leave the car in the forest. He frowned in thought as his ear twitched towards his left where he could hear the faint buzzing of an old radio on someones window. The street was almost completely empty, save at least three people, that he could see at least.

An elderly woman was sitting in a rocking chair on the porch of her old run down house, the tell tail signs of neglect evident all over her property. The once white paint had just about completely flecked off, the only white remaining tainted an ugly brown. She eyed them suspiciously from her seat, her hands no longer working on the dirty blue thing she seemed to be knitting. When her eyes landed on Nero he couldn't help but shudder and pick up his pace until he was at Dante's side, said elder remained silent on the matter, which he was grateful for. It seemed the red clad devil was going to be serious for once.

Averting his gaze from the creepy old lady Nero turned his attention back to the road, absently curling his tail tighter around his waist. This place was making the hairs on his neck stand on end, or, to quote Dante...It was making his hackles rise. He glanced to his left, where Dante continued to walk on in an uncharacteristic silence, his slate blue eyes casually flicking over the surrounding area, his senses obviously on alert for any possible danger. Turning his mind over to the mission details Nero vaguely wondered where the hell everyone was, this place was supposed to be a bustling country town that worshiped evil behind closed doors. So where the hell was all the bustling? Creepy old lady aside the only other people he could see were an older man and a young boy knelt in the dirt by an old house seemingly fixing something he couldn't see, but even then they'd stopped to stare at the odd white haired strangers. He cleared his throat and glanced back to Dante, who had flicked his gaze to him to show he was listening.

"Is it just me, or is this town a spin off of Silent Hill?" He saw a faint smirk flit across Dante's lips and scowled.

"What's wrong kid, scared?" Nero scoffed.

"Hardly, it's just...creepy is what I'm say'n." Dante grunted but otherwise remained silent, which confused the hell out of Nero, who stared at him with a raised brow, but before he could ask what the hell was wrong with his lover, he stopped still, ears perked. Dante noticed his hesitation and stopped and looked back at him.

"Come on kid, stop wasting daylight." Nero raised a hand to silence the elder and frowned. For a moment he though he'd heard something, but as he listened to the silence, he realized it was exactly that...Silent. He frowned as Dante folded his arms. "What is it?" Nero shook his head slowly, then turned and continued walking, passing a blinking devil hunter.

"Nothin', just thought I heard something." Dante frowned at the words, his eyes scanning over the surrounding road and buildings for a moment before he shrugged and followed after his smaller partner. For the record, Nero wasn't being paranoid, he'd heard something to...but he wasn't going to share this with the neko for three reasons and three reasons alone. 1) He'd get his head bitten off for not saying anything sooner. Though it kinda defeated the purpose of him telling anyway. 2) What ever he'd heard wasn't anything normal, assuming it was following them it would no doubt be listening too, so he'd rather not let it know he was onto it. 3) He was too lazy, simple fact for Dante, if he didn't think it a big enough deal...He didn't give two shits about the repercussions his playing dumb would have, so really...what the hell was he expected to do? Well, he was Dante, he didn't have to do shit if he didn't wanna. Nero could take care of himself... Yes that's why six months ago you were crying over his dead body like the wibbling baby you are. Dante ignored his 'inner Vergil' and continued onward. Want an explanation? Ok, you know that voice everyone gets in their head telling them shit they don't want to hear, like their conscionce. Well Dante's was no different, he'd simply given his a name, because seriously, it sounded so much like Vergil it was almost fucking insane. It bitched, it insulted him, it never took his side, it never had anything nice to say and the one that got was always right! He made a mental note to find some drugs that'd shut it up.

Because seriously, there was nothing wrong with him...

Not, a thing...


Now Nero was looking at him funny...

A/N So sorry for the short chapter I kinda did this in my math class...I got in trouble...Yeah, review please...
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