FicWad

James looked like I had dumped a bucket of cold water over his head. His eyes were wide and he just stared at me without saying a thing for several long, tense moments. The tears that had been silently trickling down my cheeks turned into fully fledged, body racking sobs. I hid my head in my hands and tried to explain the situation to James, "I didn't mean to! Honestly, I didn't! It just sort of...happened. I was missing you and I wanted someone to comfort me and you weren't there so..."

I let that sentence trail off knowing that it was probably better not to let James know all the details of last night. James still sat on the bed completely frozen. I knew he might have expected me to admit that I truly did like Dave as a boyfriend, but he obviously hadn't expected this from me. Feeling like the worst girlfriend in the world, I started to rock back and forth on the bed with each powerful sob. Feeling that I should say something more, I choked out, "I don't love Dave though. I really don't. I just wanted you and now I've ruined our relationship and you'll never trust me or want me ever again. It's all my fucking fault."

James finally managed to snap out of his paralysis. Knowing James had a short temper, I expected him to slap me or call me a few explicit words, but instead, James tilted my chin up so I had to look him in the eyes. I was really surprised by his reaction. To be honest, I had kind of wished that James would slap me. It was only what I deserved. Even though James was cupping my chin in his hands, I still managed to look down at the ground so James wouldn't have to see the pain in my eyes.

"Olivia," James said softly, "Look at me." Not wanting to defy James of anything, I reluctantly lifted my eyes to his so his hazel ones could meet my blue ones. The effect of meeting James' eyes immediately filled me with an intense feeling of longing. I wanted to snuggle up to James and have him wrap his arms tightly around me and tell me that he still loved me even after my betrayal.

"Olive, it's okay," James told me sincerely, still keeping me locked with his hazel gaze. "I'm not mad at you. Everyone can act really unpredictable if they get high and fucked up. I've done that before myself. I guess what really matters now is how you feel about me at this point. Do you still want to me with me or would you rather be with Dave?"

"I'd rather be with you of course," I sobbed loudly, feeling like the world's biggest idiot. "Like I said, I don't love Dave. He just happened to be the guy who was around while you were gone. It would've happened with whoever was in the room with me at that point of time. It had nothing to do with me being affection towards Dave or anything."

James gave me a long look and then nodded, "Why don't we all just forget about this? I hate being mad at you and I hate being separated from you even more. The last few days were like torture for me. Let's just make up. I forgive you. Can you forgive me?" I gave James a funny look with my tear-streaked eyes. What was James apologizing for? He had absolutely nothing to apologize for. I was the one who had committed the misdemeanors, not him.

"James, you really don't have anything to apologize for. Are...are you sure you can forgive me though? I was so terrible to you. I can't see how you could want me ever again after this-" James cut off my sentence and pulled me against his chest as he took my lips in between his. I was totally caught off guard by this. I couldn't believe James had just forgiven me without any strings attention. He hadn't even seemed that angry about me spending last night with Dave.

I decided to think about that later though. Right now, all I cared about was the way James was kneading my mouth with his soft lips and the way he pressed my body into his chest. My nipples perked against James' chest and I could feel myself getting turned on very quickly. I had really missed James the last few days, and it was apparent to me now that he had missed me just as much.

Abruptly, we stopped our sweet kisses and James knocked me onto my back. We quickly started stripping off each other's clothes like two wild animals. I grabbed James' black shirt that had "I have a drinking problem" lettered on it in white and pulled it over his head. James' hands moved up under my black tank top and gently traveled over my belly before he pulled the tank over my head as well. Wanting more, I unzipped James' pants and slipped them off so I could have the delight of seeing him completely naked on top of me. James reached under my back to unclasp my bra and then abruptly stopped.

"What are you doing?" I asked him with confusion. James was staring at my belly with a shocked expression. Raising an eyebrow, he looked at me suspiciously, "What the hell happened to you? You're stomach is all scraped and torn up. And...what's this on your back?" One of James' hands had found the bandage on my back and was peeling it off slowly.

I gasped from the pain as he tried to pull the bandage off and shook my head abruptly, "Please leave that on. It hurts..." James quickly withdrew his hand from my back, but continued to look down at my body with wide eyes. Feeling really self-conscious, I peeped out, "If I'm that disgusting to look at, just tell me. You don't have to do anything with me you know."

"You're not disgusting to look at," James quickly replied hastily, "You're as beautiful as ever. I'd still love you if your body was covered in a thousand scars. But seriously, Olive, I know something happened over the last few days that you didn't tell me about. I deserve to know so please spill the beans." I didn't really want to discuss the rape with James, but he was right about deserving to know. I had to tell him about this at some point of the other, so I might as well get it over now, right?

"You know how I told you about Marty's cousin taking over at the Tatou Super Club while he went on vacation?" I asked. James nodded, obviously not knowing where this was going. I continued, "It turns out that Marty's cousin was Ray. Anyways, he grabbed me and pulled me outside into an empty street. He raped me and then he tried to kill me. Dave found me just in time and brought me to the hospital. That's why I came home late that night."

James took a moment to take all this end. When he was done, he let out a few choice words and then said, "God, that dirty bastard needs to go to hell. Where is he now? I'll kill him for what he did to you." James' cheeks were flushed and there was a look of the greatest loathing in his eyes. I swear if I had told James where Ray was, he would've grabbed a gun and gone out to hunt him down right away. Turns out, Ray was dead so there was no need for that.

"Ray's dead, James," I told him somberly, resting a hand on his chest in an attempt to get him to calm down. "Dave shot him. Nobody knows about that though, so please keep quiet about that." James raised a blonde brow in surprise when he heard that Dave had shot Ray. A look of greater respect for Dave filled his eyes.

"Well, I guess Dave did one thing right," James admitted grudgingly. "Why did Ray try to kill you though? He had never tried that before." I thought back to the scene on the street when Ray had taken out his knife and put it to my back. Remembering what Ray had said, I explained, "He...um...didn't like the fact that we were together."

"Fuck him," James snarled, obviously really enraged. "I wish I had been there to be the one to kill him. What ways did he hurt you?" I pointed to my stomach and then answered, "Well, I've got a lot of scraps and bruises, but really, those aren't too bad. Ray cut my back open pretty badly though. He was going to cut up my leg next so I would bleed to death, but Dave caught him just before that time. Thank god Dave was there or else I'd be nothing more than a corpse right now."

James kissed my mouth to keep me from saying anything else and murmured, "Don't say that. I don't want to even imagine that. Can I look at your back?" I was about to say no, but James didn't wait for me to finish the sentence. Instead, he went ahead and flipped me gently onto my stomach so he could see my back. When he saw the two, long intersecting cuts, he let out a long breath and said, "God, Olivia, you've had these for the last three days and I didn't know anything about this?"

"Well, we weren't talking so..." I let my sentence trail off and flipped back over onto my back so I cut look up into James' eyes and see his expression. James was shaking his head miserably and he seemed pretty angry, "I can't believe I neglected you when you needed me most. No wonder you wanted sex with Dave." I flinched at those words and James quickly added, "Oops, sorry, we weren't going to talk about that anymore. Hey, what's these?"

James picked up the bottle of painkillers on the nightstand and opened the bottle only to find that it was empty. He looked from the empty bottle to my guilty face and narrowed his eyes suspiciously, "Oh no, don't tell me you took the whole bottle of pills already!" I didn't answer that. I had indeed taken all the pills yesterday when I had gotten my high.

"That's what caused you to get so fucked up yesterday, isn't it?" James said as if he was reading my thoughts. I nodded guiltily and started playing with the edge of the sheet nervously. James gave me a funny look, "No wonder you got so high. Never ever take more than the recommended dose of painkillers, Olive."

"Yeah, I'm realizing that," I muttered as my stomach lurched around irritably. I still felt like I was going to have to throw up at any moment. James gave me a look filled with concern and compassion, "What can I do to make you feel better? I'll do anything for you. I can't believe that I left you alone this whole time. You could've been killed."

James was right, but I decided not to acknowledge that statement. I didn't really like thinking about me as being nothing more than a bodily shell with a dead soul. I did know exactly what I wanted from James though. Trying to find my usual seductiveness, I fluttered my eyelashes and him and asked, "Love me?"

James looked down at my body hungrily. I could tell he was trying hard to resist from tearing off the rest of my clothes to get to my nakedness underneath. However, James somehow managed to keep in control of himself. He gently stroked the hair off of my face and said, "Um, I dunno, Olive. How badly are you hurt? I don't want to hurt you even more."

"I'm not that bad," I lied. My back was stinging with the pain, but I was doing my best to ignore it. "Come on, please James? I want you bad." James finally found he couldn't resist me. His hands traveled back underneath me and unclasped my bra, letting my breasts free. James cupped one of them in his hand and caressed it gently with his fingertips before taking his tongue and gently resting it over my nipple. I gave a little cry of pleasure and squirmed under James' touch, momentarily forgetting about the pain.

James gave the same treatment to my left breast before letting his hands travel ever so lightly over my tender belly. His hands deftly unbuttoned and unzipped my jeans. He cast them aside onto the floor and gently placed himself over my body. He gave me a tentative look and asked, "Is this okay? Am I hurting you at all?"

"Stop worrying about that!" I told him. I didn't really even care if James did end up hurting me a little bit. I already had a lot of pain in the rest of my body right now. A little more pain certainly wasn't going to kill me. James' love could definitely end up making me feel a lot better though. I still couldn't believe that he had forgiven me so easily. He was definitely the best boyfriend anyone could wish for. He was kind, compassionate, loving, and strong. There was nobody like my boyfriend.