FicWad

I have not slept at all last night all my thoughts kept me up, thoughts about leaving or staying. Part of me does want to leave thinking this if for the best if I want to get better then this is the right choice. The other part is yelling for me to stay because of Gerard but if he is leaving then there is no use for me to stay.

Today the doctor would be explaining more about the other place I would be going too. I was sitting in his office listening to him talk about this place called [b]Royal Park[/b]. Royal Park was in California it was on a beach. The place sounded wonderful but the question still remains did I want to go.

By going to the place, I would have to start all over, by getting use to new doctors and new strangers. I haven’t even gotten use to everyone here, so was it really worth it.


“You would be staying here for two months by the end of the two months, if you felt like you needed to stay longer then you could, “The doctor kept explaining.

“What if it did not work out that I wanted to leave, what would happen, “I ask.

“If you did not like it there then you would come back here, I would not make you stay here for seven months. I want you to be able to leave this asylum for good. If this is something you want to try then go for it, you can always come back here. I will give you two weeks to decide, “The doctor replied.

Two weeks to decide if I wanted to leave even that was not long enough for me to decide. I left the doctor’s office still unknown what I wanted to do. This could be what I need to get better to go somewhere new, but the again this could be also the worst thing I did.

I was going to go to the one place where I always go to think, I headed towards the sundeck. While I got to the glass, doors I saw Gerard out there, but I also seen someone else out there. I walk a little closer to see a girl talking to him. She had long black hair with pale skin; her eyes were a golden brown. Gerard and her were just laughing as if nothing was wrong.

I felt my heart break he really did not care about me anymore, I felt angry but more sad. I wanted to yell at him I wanted to let all my angry out on him but all I could do was stand there. Part of me wanted to just run away and go to the doctor I made up my mind I wanted to leave.

I push all my feelings away I was going to go out there I had to face my fears at some point, I slowly open the doors. I made sure my eyes did not look at Gerard or his [i]friend[/i] I look straight headed and I walk towards the brick wall.

I could feel eyes on me as I walk by but I did not bother to look back I was not going give in. Once I got to the brick wall, I climb on top I lay down on the top and look up towards the sky. My thoughts wonder back to leaving I knew I would have to make my choice soon. If I left I would be leaving everything behind I would be starting new I would not have someone to run too every time I got scared but as if I have someone now.

I could do make my choice on someone who no longer cared about me, this had to be about me. I could hear them talking but I did not bother to listen. I got up from laying down I sit up while looking out towards the sky. I could be free from this place I could leave everything behind and start new. And just like, I knew what I was going to do. I was going to leave everything and to go Royal Park.

So sorry for the long wait. Forgive me? Thanks for the reviews