Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > Life's a Bitch....So Are You
Mandy woke up with Patrick’s arms wrapped around her making her smile.
“Today’s Christmas Eve isn’t it?”
“Sure is.” Patrick said with his eyes closed.
Mandy sighed. “Today our families are gonna have dinner…with each other.”
“They sure are.”
“Fuck I already have a headache.”
“Let’s not forget that my mom wants us all to stay there tonight.”
“Why?” She whined.
“She hates it when I’m alone for Christmas but I told her that I’m not and then she said bring them over here and we’ll spend Christmas morning together.”
“Shitty fuck!” Mandy yelled in the pillow.
Everyone was in a hurry between getting everyone’s presents and getting dressed with only two bathrooms and five people who had to shower it was more than hectic but eventually Mandy was ready her father was the first to be ready but he’s always first then Patrick then Mandy her brother Chris then her mother.
“Well there’s another thing you get from your mom.” Patrick said as he walked in their bedroom.
“And what is that?” Mandy asked as she put a different pair of earrings on.
“You both take a long ass time to get ready.”
“Oh please Patrick! You take 10 minutes alone just to pick out a hat! I had to pick out your outfit so we’re not here all day.”
“Shut up I picked the vest out.”
“I bought it for you.” She said as she smiled and kissed his cheek.
“Okay are we ready?” Mandy’s father said with annoyance.
“Yes.” Mandy and her mother said.
“Okay Patrick you take the lead because I have no idea where I’m going.”
“That’s a nice get up man. I don’t have nice anything.” Chris said as he pointed to Patrick.
“Chris you have a fucking Rolex.” Mandy said to herself.
Patrick and Mandy eventually got to his parent’s house. Tonight they were doing a Christmas Eve dinner. Nothing fancy just a few side dishes and a ham. Mandy stepped out of the car almost breaking her neck up the stairs in her boots.
“That’s why you shouldn’t wear high heels in the snow sugar.” Patrick said as he helped her.
“They complement my outfit.” Mandy said as she fixed her sweater. Her outfit was nice, it was her favorite Ralph Lauren from the boots to the headband she wore.
Patrick rolled his eyes as he knocked on the door and his oldest brother Kevin opened it.
He smiled and put his hand out to Mandy. “Hi I’m Kevin Patrick’s brother. I’m the reason he wet the bed till he was 8.”
Patrick covered his face with his hands. “Merry Christmas Kevin.” He mumbled as he walked past him.
“Hi Kevin I’m Mandy.” She said as she smiled and held back a laugh for Patrick and examined him. He looked nothing like Patrick. He was handsome but not like Patrick his features were much different he looked more like their mom and Patrick took after their father. Kevin was tall with a little more hair than Patrick blonde hair and brown eyes. Handsome but not like her Patrick.
“Wow Rick she’s gorgeous. The reason you’re dating him is?”
“Kevin be nice!” Patricia said as she came to the door and greeted her son’s guests.
“I’m Patricia Patrick’s mother.” She said as she smiled putting her hand out to Mandy’s mother.
“Hi I’m Cathy. It’s nice to meet you. Your son is wonderful.” She said as she smiled.
Mandy and Patrick’s mouths dropped. Mandy was shocked really her mother gives out compliments every once in a while and she used it on Patrick? She couldn’t believe it.
“I’m wonderful?” Patrick whispered to himself.
Mandy walked into the living room and everything was decorated beautifully pictures of Patrick and his siblings with Santa Clause made her smile uncontrollably.
“So Mandy what’s shakin’?” Kevin said as he crept up on her.
“Um…nothing?”
“Kevin leave her alone! How come you pick on the nice one but when he brought home a stripper your mouth was shut?” A girl that was slightly short with blonde hair.
“’Cause you’re a bitch that’s why!”
“Patrick dated a stripper?” Mandy asked as she watched the siblings bicker.
“NO! She means Amber I never dated a stripper!” Patrick shouted with a nervous tone of voice.
“Oh. Okay.” She said as she laughed.
“Sorry I never even introduced myself. I’m Megan Patrick’s sister.”
“I figured. Nice to meet you I’m Mandy.” She said as she smiled politely.
“I’ve heard a lot about you Mandy; I think my mother likes you more than me.”
“That’s because no one likes you.” Patrick and Kevin said at once.
“Aren’t my brothers sweet as sugar?” She said sarcastically.
“They’ll rot your teeth.” Mandy said as she laughed.
“So what do you think of the people who are responsible for me being a loner?”
“I think they’re nice. Kevin reminds me of all of my brother’s combined and I like Megan she’s sweet.”
“You know what’s funny?”
“The fact that your brother and sister have the same names as my friend and cousin?”
“Yes.” He said with disappointment making Mandy laugh.
The evening went on smoothly Patrick and Mandy’s parents hit it off. This time Patrick’s stepfather was there too. Mandy and Patrick couldn’t believe it. Everything went great. It was perfect.
“Goodnight Mother.” Patrick called from the hallway as he got his bag and put on pajamas.
Mandy walked in yawning as Patrick threw off his pants.
“Ahh! Close the door Mandy! Everybody’s gonna see my junk.” He yelled.
“I want everyone to see your junk it’s bootiful.”
“What’s wrong?” He said as he put on his pants.
“Nothing. Why?”
“You only say bootiful when you’re drunk and I know you didn’t drink tonight.”
“I’m just tired. I just now finished cleaning the kitchen.” She said as she sat on the bed and took off her boots.
“Didn’t my sister help?”
“No. I told her not to.”
Patrick shook his head. “Then stop complaining bitch.”
“Fine I will you slut.” She said as she laughed and slipped her skirt off.
Patrick smiled lazily as he got under the covers. “You know this is my old room?”
“Is it?” She said as she threw her sweater off and unbuttoned her shirt and laughed to herself. “I can imagine how many masturbating sessions you had in here.”
“Fuck you.” He said as he laughed with her. “But yeah I pretty much played and wrote music in here and I masturbated that was my life.”
“What do you mean was?” She said as she laughed harder.
“I have a girlfriend now I don’t need to.”
Mandy laughed. “Okay if that’s what you need to tell yourself.”
“Shut your mouth and just get in bed.” He said as he chuckled.
She slipped on a nightgown and got in bed with Patrick. She swore soon as her head hit the pillow she was going to sleep. She almost did until she felt soft kisses on her neck.
“What are you doing?” She said sounding half asleep.
“Rocket science. What’s it look like?” He said sarcastically.
“Patrick stop. Now.”
“No.” He said as he went lower down her neck.
“Patrick! We’re in the same house with my parents and yours! I’m not doing this.” She hissed.
“Too bad.” He said against her skin. His breath felt hot against it making her want to rip that ridiculous nightgown off and let him nail her but that would be wrong.
“Patrick pleeeease.” She whined. “This is really gross I’m not having sex with my parents in the same house! What if someone hears us?”
“No one will hear us if we’re extra quiet. You can be quiet. You’re good at it…or you just fake it.” He said as he sat up on his elbows.
“I don’t fake orgasms Patrick.” She said as she laughed.
“Good to know. Now let’s sex.” He said as pulled her nightgown up.
“No.” She whispered as she pulled it back down. “No means no dammit!”
“You’re evil and selfish. It’s our first Christmas together and I wanted this to be special by sexing you but if you wanna be mean go right ahead you pooty face.”
Mandy held back laughter as she kissed his forehead. “Goodnight puppy.”
“Goodnight.” He said as he turned on his side.
The lights were off and Patrick’s breath began to even out but Mandy felt like he was disappointed or even mad. She couldn’t stand it when he was mad so if she wanted to sleep at all she had to make sure he’s not.
“Patrick?”
“Yes Amanda darling.”
“Don’t be mad I promise we’ll have relations soon.”
“If you ever call it relations again we won’t.”
“Fine we’ll fuck our brains out soon. Is that better?” She said as she turned on her side.
“Much. I love it when you say fuck.”
“You’re disgusting.” She said she laughed.
“I haven’t always been like this it’s just when you date a pervert you eventually become one.” He said as he rolled over on his back.
“That’s true.”
“Goodnight.” He said as he kissed her cheek and wrapped his arms around her.
“Night. I love you.”
“Love you too.” He said as his eyes got heavy.
This was boring and filler-ish so I apologize for that I promise the next one will be better. Merry belated Christmas and Happy New Year and if you're a jew...hahahahaha jews. I loves them.
“Today’s Christmas Eve isn’t it?”
“Sure is.” Patrick said with his eyes closed.
Mandy sighed. “Today our families are gonna have dinner…with each other.”
“They sure are.”
“Fuck I already have a headache.”
“Let’s not forget that my mom wants us all to stay there tonight.”
“Why?” She whined.
“She hates it when I’m alone for Christmas but I told her that I’m not and then she said bring them over here and we’ll spend Christmas morning together.”
“Shitty fuck!” Mandy yelled in the pillow.
Everyone was in a hurry between getting everyone’s presents and getting dressed with only two bathrooms and five people who had to shower it was more than hectic but eventually Mandy was ready her father was the first to be ready but he’s always first then Patrick then Mandy her brother Chris then her mother.
“Well there’s another thing you get from your mom.” Patrick said as he walked in their bedroom.
“And what is that?” Mandy asked as she put a different pair of earrings on.
“You both take a long ass time to get ready.”
“Oh please Patrick! You take 10 minutes alone just to pick out a hat! I had to pick out your outfit so we’re not here all day.”
“Shut up I picked the vest out.”
“I bought it for you.” She said as she smiled and kissed his cheek.
“Okay are we ready?” Mandy’s father said with annoyance.
“Yes.” Mandy and her mother said.
“Okay Patrick you take the lead because I have no idea where I’m going.”
“That’s a nice get up man. I don’t have nice anything.” Chris said as he pointed to Patrick.
“Chris you have a fucking Rolex.” Mandy said to herself.
Patrick and Mandy eventually got to his parent’s house. Tonight they were doing a Christmas Eve dinner. Nothing fancy just a few side dishes and a ham. Mandy stepped out of the car almost breaking her neck up the stairs in her boots.
“That’s why you shouldn’t wear high heels in the snow sugar.” Patrick said as he helped her.
“They complement my outfit.” Mandy said as she fixed her sweater. Her outfit was nice, it was her favorite Ralph Lauren from the boots to the headband she wore.
Patrick rolled his eyes as he knocked on the door and his oldest brother Kevin opened it.
He smiled and put his hand out to Mandy. “Hi I’m Kevin Patrick’s brother. I’m the reason he wet the bed till he was 8.”
Patrick covered his face with his hands. “Merry Christmas Kevin.” He mumbled as he walked past him.
“Hi Kevin I’m Mandy.” She said as she smiled and held back a laugh for Patrick and examined him. He looked nothing like Patrick. He was handsome but not like Patrick his features were much different he looked more like their mom and Patrick took after their father. Kevin was tall with a little more hair than Patrick blonde hair and brown eyes. Handsome but not like her Patrick.
“Wow Rick she’s gorgeous. The reason you’re dating him is?”
“Kevin be nice!” Patricia said as she came to the door and greeted her son’s guests.
“I’m Patricia Patrick’s mother.” She said as she smiled putting her hand out to Mandy’s mother.
“Hi I’m Cathy. It’s nice to meet you. Your son is wonderful.” She said as she smiled.
Mandy and Patrick’s mouths dropped. Mandy was shocked really her mother gives out compliments every once in a while and she used it on Patrick? She couldn’t believe it.
“I’m wonderful?” Patrick whispered to himself.
Mandy walked into the living room and everything was decorated beautifully pictures of Patrick and his siblings with Santa Clause made her smile uncontrollably.
“So Mandy what’s shakin’?” Kevin said as he crept up on her.
“Um…nothing?”
“Kevin leave her alone! How come you pick on the nice one but when he brought home a stripper your mouth was shut?” A girl that was slightly short with blonde hair.
“’Cause you’re a bitch that’s why!”
“Patrick dated a stripper?” Mandy asked as she watched the siblings bicker.
“NO! She means Amber I never dated a stripper!” Patrick shouted with a nervous tone of voice.
“Oh. Okay.” She said as she laughed.
“Sorry I never even introduced myself. I’m Megan Patrick’s sister.”
“I figured. Nice to meet you I’m Mandy.” She said as she smiled politely.
“I’ve heard a lot about you Mandy; I think my mother likes you more than me.”
“That’s because no one likes you.” Patrick and Kevin said at once.
“Aren’t my brothers sweet as sugar?” She said sarcastically.
“They’ll rot your teeth.” Mandy said as she laughed.
“So what do you think of the people who are responsible for me being a loner?”
“I think they’re nice. Kevin reminds me of all of my brother’s combined and I like Megan she’s sweet.”
“You know what’s funny?”
“The fact that your brother and sister have the same names as my friend and cousin?”
“Yes.” He said with disappointment making Mandy laugh.
The evening went on smoothly Patrick and Mandy’s parents hit it off. This time Patrick’s stepfather was there too. Mandy and Patrick couldn’t believe it. Everything went great. It was perfect.
“Goodnight Mother.” Patrick called from the hallway as he got his bag and put on pajamas.
Mandy walked in yawning as Patrick threw off his pants.
“Ahh! Close the door Mandy! Everybody’s gonna see my junk.” He yelled.
“I want everyone to see your junk it’s bootiful.”
“What’s wrong?” He said as he put on his pants.
“Nothing. Why?”
“You only say bootiful when you’re drunk and I know you didn’t drink tonight.”
“I’m just tired. I just now finished cleaning the kitchen.” She said as she sat on the bed and took off her boots.
“Didn’t my sister help?”
“No. I told her not to.”
Patrick shook his head. “Then stop complaining bitch.”
“Fine I will you slut.” She said as she laughed and slipped her skirt off.
Patrick smiled lazily as he got under the covers. “You know this is my old room?”
“Is it?” She said as she threw her sweater off and unbuttoned her shirt and laughed to herself. “I can imagine how many masturbating sessions you had in here.”
“Fuck you.” He said as he laughed with her. “But yeah I pretty much played and wrote music in here and I masturbated that was my life.”
“What do you mean was?” She said as she laughed harder.
“I have a girlfriend now I don’t need to.”
Mandy laughed. “Okay if that’s what you need to tell yourself.”
“Shut your mouth and just get in bed.” He said as he chuckled.
She slipped on a nightgown and got in bed with Patrick. She swore soon as her head hit the pillow she was going to sleep. She almost did until she felt soft kisses on her neck.
“What are you doing?” She said sounding half asleep.
“Rocket science. What’s it look like?” He said sarcastically.
“Patrick stop. Now.”
“No.” He said as he went lower down her neck.
“Patrick! We’re in the same house with my parents and yours! I’m not doing this.” She hissed.
“Too bad.” He said against her skin. His breath felt hot against it making her want to rip that ridiculous nightgown off and let him nail her but that would be wrong.
“Patrick pleeeease.” She whined. “This is really gross I’m not having sex with my parents in the same house! What if someone hears us?”
“No one will hear us if we’re extra quiet. You can be quiet. You’re good at it…or you just fake it.” He said as he sat up on his elbows.
“I don’t fake orgasms Patrick.” She said as she laughed.
“Good to know. Now let’s sex.” He said as pulled her nightgown up.
“No.” She whispered as she pulled it back down. “No means no dammit!”
“You’re evil and selfish. It’s our first Christmas together and I wanted this to be special by sexing you but if you wanna be mean go right ahead you pooty face.”
Mandy held back laughter as she kissed his forehead. “Goodnight puppy.”
“Goodnight.” He said as he turned on his side.
The lights were off and Patrick’s breath began to even out but Mandy felt like he was disappointed or even mad. She couldn’t stand it when he was mad so if she wanted to sleep at all she had to make sure he’s not.
“Patrick?”
“Yes Amanda darling.”
“Don’t be mad I promise we’ll have relations soon.”
“If you ever call it relations again we won’t.”
“Fine we’ll fuck our brains out soon. Is that better?” She said as she turned on her side.
“Much. I love it when you say fuck.”
“You’re disgusting.” She said she laughed.
“I haven’t always been like this it’s just when you date a pervert you eventually become one.” He said as he rolled over on his back.
“That’s true.”
“Goodnight.” He said as he kissed her cheek and wrapped his arms around her.
“Night. I love you.”
“Love you too.” He said as his eyes got heavy.
This was boring and filler-ish so I apologize for that I promise the next one will be better. Merry belated Christmas and Happy New Year and if you're a jew...hahahahaha jews. I loves them.
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