Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Asylum
The next day finally came again sleep didn’t come to me; today I would be trying to walk past that spot. I would be doing this by myself to see if I could do this alone. Deep down I knew I could not do this alone I hated the fact I had to do this alone but the doctor wanted me to try. Morning came the sun was shining right through my room making my room way bright. I can finally sleep in the dark or at least I think I can I haven’t slept in days so I don’t know if that fear is gone or still there.
Within an hour, the time had come to finally see if I could face my fear, no one was in the hallway. I was way down at the end I had to make it past the middle part that’s all I had to do. I slowly started making my way down I could hear my own foot steps while I was walking. I was somewhat clam I could feel my heart race a little, as I got closer to the spot my heart started to race. Before I could even think I was already at the spot I tried to keep on going but my legs would not move it was as if I froze in that spot, sudden the thoughts of that day came into my mind.
Flashback
“You didn’t try to be my friend; you played with my damn feelings. One minute you didn’t like me then you had to question yourself if you did. On top of that, it took you forever just to tell me you had a boyfriend, sounds like you are shame, “He said.
“For the last damn time I said I was sorry for that, but I’m not no more. I am not shame damn it I love him and there is nothing you can do about that. I would never like you, so do your self a favor and leave me along, “I replied.
I felt a sharp pain in my stomach. I grab my stomach while slowly going down on the floor, Tyler look at me before bending down.
“If I can’t have you then no one can, “He whisper
I could feel the tears going down my face I finally cried I tried to stay strong and not show my weak side but I couldn’t take it any longer I finally just broke down. I felt light headed I felt just like I did that day except for the pain in my stomach. I just look at that spot I could see myself laying in there in my own blood. I tried to get those thoughts out of my head but those thoughts wouldn’t leave. I couldn’t do this I wasn’t ready I ran down the hallway far from that spot I had no idea where I was running too I just wanted to be far away from there. I ran into my room to see Gerard sitting at the table I had, he look at me with sadness in his eyes before I could say anything he hug me.
“Tell me what happen, “He whisper.
“ I tried so hard to over come my fear I gave it everything but as soon as I got to that damn spot the thoughts of it happening came into my mind, I couldn’t keep it inside of me any longer, “ I said while still crying a little.
“I’m glad your finally letting your feelings out, it’s not good keeping this all bottle up inside. I know you can do this I believe in you so much, it takes time, “He said while sitting holding on to me.
“I just hate showing how I really feel I’m never good explain how I feel. If it wasn’t for you believing in me I could never do this, “I said while looking at him.
If Gerard believes in me then maybe I could finally face my fears, even though I know it was never going to be easy.
Second Update.
Within an hour, the time had come to finally see if I could face my fear, no one was in the hallway. I was way down at the end I had to make it past the middle part that’s all I had to do. I slowly started making my way down I could hear my own foot steps while I was walking. I was somewhat clam I could feel my heart race a little, as I got closer to the spot my heart started to race. Before I could even think I was already at the spot I tried to keep on going but my legs would not move it was as if I froze in that spot, sudden the thoughts of that day came into my mind.
Flashback
“You didn’t try to be my friend; you played with my damn feelings. One minute you didn’t like me then you had to question yourself if you did. On top of that, it took you forever just to tell me you had a boyfriend, sounds like you are shame, “He said.
“For the last damn time I said I was sorry for that, but I’m not no more. I am not shame damn it I love him and there is nothing you can do about that. I would never like you, so do your self a favor and leave me along, “I replied.
I felt a sharp pain in my stomach. I grab my stomach while slowly going down on the floor, Tyler look at me before bending down.
“If I can’t have you then no one can, “He whisper
I could feel the tears going down my face I finally cried I tried to stay strong and not show my weak side but I couldn’t take it any longer I finally just broke down. I felt light headed I felt just like I did that day except for the pain in my stomach. I just look at that spot I could see myself laying in there in my own blood. I tried to get those thoughts out of my head but those thoughts wouldn’t leave. I couldn’t do this I wasn’t ready I ran down the hallway far from that spot I had no idea where I was running too I just wanted to be far away from there. I ran into my room to see Gerard sitting at the table I had, he look at me with sadness in his eyes before I could say anything he hug me.
“Tell me what happen, “He whisper.
“ I tried so hard to over come my fear I gave it everything but as soon as I got to that damn spot the thoughts of it happening came into my mind, I couldn’t keep it inside of me any longer, “ I said while still crying a little.
“I’m glad your finally letting your feelings out, it’s not good keeping this all bottle up inside. I know you can do this I believe in you so much, it takes time, “He said while sitting holding on to me.
“I just hate showing how I really feel I’m never good explain how I feel. If it wasn’t for you believing in me I could never do this, “I said while looking at him.
If Gerard believes in me then maybe I could finally face my fears, even though I know it was never going to be easy.
Second Update.
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