Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > The Only Hope
Meg~
''Course.' I thought. RIGHT when were about to leave, the Dracs decide to come. I JUST WANTED TO LEAVE FOR GODSAKE.
But, I've wanting this for three long monthes. No, not having the Killjoys get in danger, but my chance to kill.
I was ready to show these punks how it's done. My hand slid to my white raygun that Jet had found out in the desert. It originally was a Drac's gun, since it's a dirty white color. The BLI/nd logo was scratched and dirt-spotted, but still visible. But, you know what they say. Revenge is a Bitch, ain't it?
My arms tightened as I raised my gun, charging towards the Dracs in an onward rampage. My finger pulsed the trigger, and PEEOW. The ray ran itself smack dab into one Drac's head like nothin'. One down. Four to go.
Frankie turned his head, and gave an evil grin. I winked right back at him. I took my rightful place in the line of Killjoys. I was lucky enough for Poison not to notice me.
"Welcome to the Pack" Frankie said. We all fired simoultaniously. Each and every shot was a clean one, and killed them off right then and there. I gave my gun a quick, cowgirl style twirl around the trigger, and landed it swiftly right into my gun pocket. I watched as the Dracs dropped to the ground like dying flies in the summertime. I felt a rush through my body, the feeling of....of what? Oh yeah!
Victory.
I watched as Poison wiped the sweat off of his head and turned to our direction.
His sharp eyes met mine automatically.
"Meg." he breathed.
"Yeah?".
"What did I TELL YOU?". The anger was starting to rear its ugly head again.
"Yeah...about that...".
"NO! You were SUPPOSED to stay in the TRANS-AM with KENDLE!" he rampaged right toward me. Panicked, I started backing up. Frankie interviened us.
"Gerard, Gerard, calm yourself! I'm sure she stayed in the car like you told her--".
We felt something.
And just like that, we stopped talking.
The feeling grew under our feet. It was a deep rumbling...
It rose, grew, widened in size and sound. The vibrations were causing me to try and keep my balance. I flew to Frankie's side involuntarily. I clutched his shirt in fear, and he wrapped his arms around me. Gerard booked it to the motel, as he raced the dust cloud coming his way...
Gerard~
My eyes were burning. But, I had to keep them open, no matter how much dust and grit made its way into my sockets. The wind was starting to have a gravitational pull toward the direction of the dust cloud....and whatever was making it. My eyes only longed for one thing.
That was Kendle.
I was wishing so hard that she was okay. The dust cloud was starting to part, enough for me to get a view of the motel. A sillouhette of a feminine figure stood right in my path.
"KENDLE!".
She was alright.
The clouds parted some more.
"GERARD! HELP!!!!!".
My heart skipped a few beats.
She wasn't there anymore. The sillouhette dropped to the ground, getting pulled away from the motel.
"GERARD!". I gave it my all, as I sprinted, more speedy than usual. I wasn't letting her go. The pull was getting stronger.
And stronger.
More.
The sillouhette drifted into the distance. I saw hands clawing at the ground, trying to reach out for me. A bigger sillouhette raised my vision.
A cylindar...with wings?
Standing upright.
"Oh My God".
She was getting taken away from me.
"KENDLE NO! OHMYGOD DON'T LEAVE ME! KENDLE!!".
And I ran. My heart was pumping so fast, too fast for words. I was loosing another one.
"GERARD! HELP!!!!".
More screaming. She was getting even more pulled back towards the cylindar. I was using everything in my power to reach for her hand, but I was too far away......
And my baby.
A tear strolled down my face. I heard my name again...more muffled than last time.
A light broke through the dust, a man, a pair of hands.
My baby getting stolen away from me.
"~gerard.....~".
A door closing, I cried for her name.
I dropped to my knees.
And just like that, she was gone.
I fell on my knees as the ship took Kendle away, I blinked hard to keep tears from washing the dust out of my sad eyes. Oh my god. Why Kendle? Why?! Why was this god for saken world after me?! Killing off everyone I love. One. By. One. First Mom. Then Dad. The world around me. Then Mikey. And now... Kendle. My baby, the love of my life, the one girl I could possibly care for...
There was a logo on the spaceship read MARS. Mars? They were taking her back to Mars?! HOW WOULD WE EVER GET HER BACK?!
I sobbed with choked breaths and shakey hands.
The last thing I remember was dust scratching its way down my throat, hands grabbing at me and people telling me to get up. I couldn't. It felt like I was being washed away under giant waves, as if someone was smothering me or injecting me with drugs. Kendle was gone. Kendle was gone. Kendle IS gone.
These are the only words I can process right now. I'm too busy worrying about her to be able to focus on holding on. It just feels like I'm fadding. Without her, I'm an empty, twisted shell with a Ray Gun. Without her. I'm nothing. A mindless zombie. A broken figure. DEAD.
Once again--Kendle is gone.
'Cause these are the only thoughts I can process.
Kendle~
"GERARD! GERARD!" I scream, watching out the ship's window as he falls to his knees, Frankie, Meg, and Ray are just now discovering him.
That's all I was able to make out because I was miles away now, the ship was probably going faster than light.
Earth soon became a fadded figure and people dressed in white crowded around me.
"We need you to tell us your name." One says as if I was foreign, talking slowly.
I shake my head, tears brimming in my eyes as I shy away from them. They sigh and pluck a hair from my head and enter it in a machine.
"Kendle Helen. 20 years old, mother is Rachel Helen who lives on Mars in Static City, 228 Sunset Drive. Has a sister named Meg Helen, also 20 years old. Father is--"
"I don't want to know who he is." I blurt, scowling at the people in white.
I claw at the ground as I imagine what's happening to Gerard. What if the Dracs got to them? What if they didn't make it? Oh GOD. Where were they taking me?!
"Where are you taking me?" I trembled, tears threatening to come pouring down my face.
"To Mars, of course, we came back to Earth to make sure we didn't leave anyone behind." My face boiled with anger.
"TAKE ME BACK TO EARTH RIGHT NOW, DAMMIT!" I yelled, banging my fists against the glass window the the people in white pulled me away into a dark room whith nothing but a bed. "GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!"
I don't know how long I was in there, but soon the ship came to a stop and the doors opened and they let me out, "We called your mother, she'll be arriving shortly to take you home." The woman said and I shivered, coiling away from them. "We have medicine for you, and make sure your mother feeds you, God knows how long you've been out there." They said and the woman handed me some pills and I shook my head.
"No."
"Why not?"
"How do I know you're not going to poison me?" 'Poison'. as in 'Party Poison'. Oh my God everything's going to remind me of Gerard!!
The woman raised her eyebrows and urged me to take the pills. No. Nononnonononono. They're going to Poi--Poison... Poison... oh God Gerard I miss him so much!!! If I told them about BLI would they believe me? If I told him that all of Earth was run by some weird ass bald dude, would they believe me? Me? The chick that looks totally insane and everyone thinks I haven't eaten or drank water in days? Years, even? If that were the case, then how the hell would I be alive? Immortality? Damn. How wrong we were to think that immortality meant never dying. I want out of here. NOW. I need to get back to Earth. I need to see Gerard. I need to let him hold me close. I need to have our child. I need to be married to him. I need him to be my family. My only hope. Because I love him more than I can imagine.
"Kendle?! Ohmigod, KENDLE~!" A familiar voice shouted and I jumped, dropping the pills on the ground.
There she was, tears pouring down her face and she pulled me into a close embrace. I was too stunned to hug back, the last person to ever hug me on Earth was Gerard. If I had known this was going to happen we would have never left the motel, I would have never removed myself from Gerard's side, and I would tell him I loved him until my voice choked. But I can't do that.
Tears. Tears splashed down my dirt covered face and my mother looked at me, fake concern written all over her face. "Honey, we need to take you home and get you cleaned up, you have cuts and bruises all over you! Are you okay?! Omigosh we need to get you some food!" She gushed and dragged me back to the car.
People and cameras were everywhere, the news crew, even, "We're here right now with a female that was abandoned on Earth for FIVE years, her name is Kendle Helen and--" The voices faded as my mother got me into her... that's not a car. NOT a car. It was... hovering... and.... WHAT THE HELL?! No. No! I want to ride in the Trans Am with the top down, I want to sit in the front seat with Gerard and Ray, Frankie, and Meg in the back as we make our way to Dr. D's to visit him. I want to be in the Trans Am again, I want to be at home. And EARTH is my home. Not this ridiculous foreign plant. It's not original. Not welcoming. It's like a plastic doll house. So fake.
A boy watched the car leave as he watched with interest, he was probably in his early twenties like me, tall, dark brown, shaggy, longish hair and pale skin, he wore ACTUAL non-killjoy clothes. It's been so long. So long since actual civilization. Mom drives fast, away from the crowd and in a spilt second we're all the way across town, she parks at a medium sized house and helps me out of the car. She doesn't ask about Meg. And I don't think she even cares.
"Honey, we're gonna get you cleaned up and then you can tell me all about it." Hell no. I'm not telling her anything.
If I told her about the Killjoys, they'd either think I was insane or they would go back to Earth and bring them here against their will. They'd hate me for it. And no one would EVER believe me about the whole "BLI has taken over the world" thing. I mean, they all think I've gone days without food or water, right? They'd probably assume I was imagining.
You know what they say, right? When you assume, it makes an 'ass' out of 'u' and 'me'.
BACK ON EARTH
Gerard~
We were already back in the Trans Am, Ray was driving this time and I sit in the back with Frankie and Meg. They silently whisper to themselves and look back at me.I knew they were all upset. Meg was trying to hold back tears and Frankie was talking to her to hide the pain in his eyes. I couldn't even see how Ray was taking it. I just-I just can't believe that she's gone... m-my child, the love of my life, gone. GONE.
"We're almost to Dr. D's." Ray choked out we all nodded our heads. I couldn't say anything. I would break out into sobs. I had to keep strong. For Kendle. I just wish I hadn't left her side... that I hadn't left her there all alone with Meg. I mean, I trust Meg, I really do, but I've gotta remember how easily it is for Kendle to influence Meg, how easy it is for her to slip away. And to think, this entire time, she was only really an arms leangth away. But I couldn't do anything.
We parked in the middle of the desert and uncovered a hole in the ground, yup, Dr. D has like this underground fortress thing. We never really ask about it, 'cause we really don't wanna know how the hell he built that being in a wheelchair 'nd all.
When we got there I knew Dr. D noticed two people were missing from the group: Mikey and Kendle.
"Um...?" Dr.D was shocked to see another missing person.
I couldn't stand it.
I just couldn't.
It burned my throat to talk.
It was hard to blink my eyes, without letting a single tear escape.
The familiar feeling of loss...the loss of another loved one...
And the bigger feeling of that person...
Never coming back.
It took some effort for me to work up words.
"She's.....She's.....A ship to Mars took her....she's gone." my voice caught up at that instant. It was impossible to stay strong for her. I would, but I had to let it out sometime...
My knees broke under me, and I was on the ground. Meg ran to my side, and I felt a tear drop onto my cheek, but it wasn't mine. It was Meg's. She dropped onto her knees right next to me. I never wanted to get up. Never wanted to stay strong anymore. I had already lost my brother. As if that wasn't hard enough.
...And without both of them, I felt so...so...
Small.
"But...how...? I think everybody here just needs a little time to themselves.....er....some rest, I mean. You can crash here tonight, if that's okay" Dr.D offered. I jumped onto on my knees, Meg's hand on my shoulder.
"NO! WE NEED TO GET HER BACK! AND AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!" I demanded. I felt my ugly side clawing it's way out of my body again.
"GERARD, GERARD! Calm down! We need sleep, anyway. I know this is important, but everybody will feel better in the morning. Sorry, but Kendle's not coming back tomorrow," Frankie tried. A flashed an angry glare in his direction. I sighed in frustration, running my fingers through my tangled hair.
"Fine. Maybe not tomorrow. But as SOON AS POSSIBLE. Let's figure this out in the morning.". Everybody agreed, and we moved on to making some make-shift beds.
'Danm.' I thought.
'Maybe....just maybe...if my heart stopped beating, it wouldn't hurt this much.'.
~~
Three in the morning.
No sleep.
Just thoughts.
Painful, painful thoughts.
I rubbed my eyes that were too stubborn to close.
The regular feeling of emptiness filled me, and stayed there ever since she was stolen. My eyes circled the ones I had left. They had no idea how goddang thankful I was for those beautiful souls.
I dragged my tired body to the ladder, that lead to the hated outdoor world.
---
I am outside, and I've been waiting for the sun.
With my wide eyes, I've seen worlds that don't belong.
---
I painfully watched the darkly clouded horizon, starless and black. This was my breaking point. My moment of mournful sadness, and people that I still couldn't believe...were permanently gone.
---
My mouth is dry with words I cannot verbalize.
Tell me why we live like this.
---
I wanted to shout to the world, to tell it to stop messing my life up. To stop stealing beloved ones right from my hands. But that's Planet Earth for ya'. Screwed up beyond repair....
I remembered being a Killjoy was what I felt I was meant to be. I was so against the whole BLI/nd thing in the first place, because I knew that the control would go way out of hand. And I was right.
Now, I just wanted to quit.
Being a Killjoy didn't feel it like it was worth the risk.
---
Keep me safe inside your arms like towers.
Tower over me.
---
I crossed my arms and shifted my feet uncomfortably. Kendle was always there. Even when she was taken away, it always felt like her spirit was standing right next to me. But, her spirit wasn't enough.
I needed her back into my arms.
And nothing would stop me until I could get that.
---
Cause we are broken.
What must we do to store our essence?
And oh, the promise we adored.
---
This planet is nothing but a broken bone, I tell you. BLI/nd just DESTROYED it. It's like mind-control!! There was one good side of being a Killjoy, and that was not being brainwashed like the rest of most of the human race...and actually being able to feel emotions towards the ones you loved.
---
Give us life again.
Cause we just wanna be home.
---
All I wanted was to be back at the diner again. Just to have everything be safe and sound....to have a somewhat happy life again.
---
Lock the doors, cause I'd like to capture this voice
that came to me tonight.
So everyone would have a choice.
---
I took one long breath, which caught the smell of dusty air. I turned back to the fortress, and climbed the ladder downwards, being careful not to wake anybody. I tiptoed back to my couch, gently laid myself down, and closed my eyes. Sleep was ready to take me over.
I heard something.
It was....what was it?
It sounded like...a mumbling.
A woman's voice!
Maybe it was just Meg talking in her sleep. I flipped my body over so I faced the back of the couch.
It didn't sound like Meg.
It sounded like....like....
"Kendle" I whispered.
My eyes shot open.
'Gerard....Gerard.....can you hear me?.....Gerard---Ger'.
The call sounded staticy and broken apart.
It wasn't just my imagination.
My body shot up like a rocket, and I tiptoed to follow the sound.
I searched high and low...the sound grew farther and farther. I graced over near Dr.D's radio equipment.
It was closer.
Closer, closer, closer! Very close!
It was dark, almost pitch black, but I could make out shapes.
And there I stood, right in front of a boombox that sounded a woman's voice...
Calling my name.
"DOCTOR!!" I yelled. Everybody jolted awake. Dr.D turned on the lights, and wheeled right over to me.
"Really?!? What's so important?" he asked in mid-yawn.
"Listen!" I held the boombox to his ears. He paused and listened to the scratchy static.
"....Kendle.".
---
And under red lights, I'll show myself it wasn't forged.
We're at war.
We live like this....
''Course.' I thought. RIGHT when were about to leave, the Dracs decide to come. I JUST WANTED TO LEAVE FOR GODSAKE.
But, I've wanting this for three long monthes. No, not having the Killjoys get in danger, but my chance to kill.
I was ready to show these punks how it's done. My hand slid to my white raygun that Jet had found out in the desert. It originally was a Drac's gun, since it's a dirty white color. The BLI/nd logo was scratched and dirt-spotted, but still visible. But, you know what they say. Revenge is a Bitch, ain't it?
My arms tightened as I raised my gun, charging towards the Dracs in an onward rampage. My finger pulsed the trigger, and PEEOW. The ray ran itself smack dab into one Drac's head like nothin'. One down. Four to go.
Frankie turned his head, and gave an evil grin. I winked right back at him. I took my rightful place in the line of Killjoys. I was lucky enough for Poison not to notice me.
"Welcome to the Pack" Frankie said. We all fired simoultaniously. Each and every shot was a clean one, and killed them off right then and there. I gave my gun a quick, cowgirl style twirl around the trigger, and landed it swiftly right into my gun pocket. I watched as the Dracs dropped to the ground like dying flies in the summertime. I felt a rush through my body, the feeling of....of what? Oh yeah!
Victory.
I watched as Poison wiped the sweat off of his head and turned to our direction.
His sharp eyes met mine automatically.
"Meg." he breathed.
"Yeah?".
"What did I TELL YOU?". The anger was starting to rear its ugly head again.
"Yeah...about that...".
"NO! You were SUPPOSED to stay in the TRANS-AM with KENDLE!" he rampaged right toward me. Panicked, I started backing up. Frankie interviened us.
"Gerard, Gerard, calm yourself! I'm sure she stayed in the car like you told her--".
We felt something.
And just like that, we stopped talking.
The feeling grew under our feet. It was a deep rumbling...
It rose, grew, widened in size and sound. The vibrations were causing me to try and keep my balance. I flew to Frankie's side involuntarily. I clutched his shirt in fear, and he wrapped his arms around me. Gerard booked it to the motel, as he raced the dust cloud coming his way...
Gerard~
My eyes were burning. But, I had to keep them open, no matter how much dust and grit made its way into my sockets. The wind was starting to have a gravitational pull toward the direction of the dust cloud....and whatever was making it. My eyes only longed for one thing.
That was Kendle.
I was wishing so hard that she was okay. The dust cloud was starting to part, enough for me to get a view of the motel. A sillouhette of a feminine figure stood right in my path.
"KENDLE!".
She was alright.
The clouds parted some more.
"GERARD! HELP!!!!!".
My heart skipped a few beats.
She wasn't there anymore. The sillouhette dropped to the ground, getting pulled away from the motel.
"GERARD!". I gave it my all, as I sprinted, more speedy than usual. I wasn't letting her go. The pull was getting stronger.
And stronger.
More.
The sillouhette drifted into the distance. I saw hands clawing at the ground, trying to reach out for me. A bigger sillouhette raised my vision.
A cylindar...with wings?
Standing upright.
"Oh My God".
She was getting taken away from me.
"KENDLE NO! OHMYGOD DON'T LEAVE ME! KENDLE!!".
And I ran. My heart was pumping so fast, too fast for words. I was loosing another one.
"GERARD! HELP!!!!".
More screaming. She was getting even more pulled back towards the cylindar. I was using everything in my power to reach for her hand, but I was too far away......
And my baby.
A tear strolled down my face. I heard my name again...more muffled than last time.
A light broke through the dust, a man, a pair of hands.
My baby getting stolen away from me.
"~gerard.....~".
A door closing, I cried for her name.
I dropped to my knees.
And just like that, she was gone.
I fell on my knees as the ship took Kendle away, I blinked hard to keep tears from washing the dust out of my sad eyes. Oh my god. Why Kendle? Why?! Why was this god for saken world after me?! Killing off everyone I love. One. By. One. First Mom. Then Dad. The world around me. Then Mikey. And now... Kendle. My baby, the love of my life, the one girl I could possibly care for...
There was a logo on the spaceship read MARS. Mars? They were taking her back to Mars?! HOW WOULD WE EVER GET HER BACK?!
I sobbed with choked breaths and shakey hands.
The last thing I remember was dust scratching its way down my throat, hands grabbing at me and people telling me to get up. I couldn't. It felt like I was being washed away under giant waves, as if someone was smothering me or injecting me with drugs. Kendle was gone. Kendle was gone. Kendle IS gone.
These are the only words I can process right now. I'm too busy worrying about her to be able to focus on holding on. It just feels like I'm fadding. Without her, I'm an empty, twisted shell with a Ray Gun. Without her. I'm nothing. A mindless zombie. A broken figure. DEAD.
Once again--Kendle is gone.
'Cause these are the only thoughts I can process.
Kendle~
"GERARD! GERARD!" I scream, watching out the ship's window as he falls to his knees, Frankie, Meg, and Ray are just now discovering him.
That's all I was able to make out because I was miles away now, the ship was probably going faster than light.
Earth soon became a fadded figure and people dressed in white crowded around me.
"We need you to tell us your name." One says as if I was foreign, talking slowly.
I shake my head, tears brimming in my eyes as I shy away from them. They sigh and pluck a hair from my head and enter it in a machine.
"Kendle Helen. 20 years old, mother is Rachel Helen who lives on Mars in Static City, 228 Sunset Drive. Has a sister named Meg Helen, also 20 years old. Father is--"
"I don't want to know who he is." I blurt, scowling at the people in white.
I claw at the ground as I imagine what's happening to Gerard. What if the Dracs got to them? What if they didn't make it? Oh GOD. Where were they taking me?!
"Where are you taking me?" I trembled, tears threatening to come pouring down my face.
"To Mars, of course, we came back to Earth to make sure we didn't leave anyone behind." My face boiled with anger.
"TAKE ME BACK TO EARTH RIGHT NOW, DAMMIT!" I yelled, banging my fists against the glass window the the people in white pulled me away into a dark room whith nothing but a bed. "GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!"
I don't know how long I was in there, but soon the ship came to a stop and the doors opened and they let me out, "We called your mother, she'll be arriving shortly to take you home." The woman said and I shivered, coiling away from them. "We have medicine for you, and make sure your mother feeds you, God knows how long you've been out there." They said and the woman handed me some pills and I shook my head.
"No."
"Why not?"
"How do I know you're not going to poison me?" 'Poison'. as in 'Party Poison'. Oh my God everything's going to remind me of Gerard!!
The woman raised her eyebrows and urged me to take the pills. No. Nononnonononono. They're going to Poi--Poison... Poison... oh God Gerard I miss him so much!!! If I told them about BLI would they believe me? If I told him that all of Earth was run by some weird ass bald dude, would they believe me? Me? The chick that looks totally insane and everyone thinks I haven't eaten or drank water in days? Years, even? If that were the case, then how the hell would I be alive? Immortality? Damn. How wrong we were to think that immortality meant never dying. I want out of here. NOW. I need to get back to Earth. I need to see Gerard. I need to let him hold me close. I need to have our child. I need to be married to him. I need him to be my family. My only hope. Because I love him more than I can imagine.
"Kendle?! Ohmigod, KENDLE~!" A familiar voice shouted and I jumped, dropping the pills on the ground.
There she was, tears pouring down her face and she pulled me into a close embrace. I was too stunned to hug back, the last person to ever hug me on Earth was Gerard. If I had known this was going to happen we would have never left the motel, I would have never removed myself from Gerard's side, and I would tell him I loved him until my voice choked. But I can't do that.
Tears. Tears splashed down my dirt covered face and my mother looked at me, fake concern written all over her face. "Honey, we need to take you home and get you cleaned up, you have cuts and bruises all over you! Are you okay?! Omigosh we need to get you some food!" She gushed and dragged me back to the car.
People and cameras were everywhere, the news crew, even, "We're here right now with a female that was abandoned on Earth for FIVE years, her name is Kendle Helen and--" The voices faded as my mother got me into her... that's not a car. NOT a car. It was... hovering... and.... WHAT THE HELL?! No. No! I want to ride in the Trans Am with the top down, I want to sit in the front seat with Gerard and Ray, Frankie, and Meg in the back as we make our way to Dr. D's to visit him. I want to be in the Trans Am again, I want to be at home. And EARTH is my home. Not this ridiculous foreign plant. It's not original. Not welcoming. It's like a plastic doll house. So fake.
A boy watched the car leave as he watched with interest, he was probably in his early twenties like me, tall, dark brown, shaggy, longish hair and pale skin, he wore ACTUAL non-killjoy clothes. It's been so long. So long since actual civilization. Mom drives fast, away from the crowd and in a spilt second we're all the way across town, she parks at a medium sized house and helps me out of the car. She doesn't ask about Meg. And I don't think she even cares.
"Honey, we're gonna get you cleaned up and then you can tell me all about it." Hell no. I'm not telling her anything.
If I told her about the Killjoys, they'd either think I was insane or they would go back to Earth and bring them here against their will. They'd hate me for it. And no one would EVER believe me about the whole "BLI has taken over the world" thing. I mean, they all think I've gone days without food or water, right? They'd probably assume I was imagining.
You know what they say, right? When you assume, it makes an 'ass' out of 'u' and 'me'.
BACK ON EARTH
Gerard~
We were already back in the Trans Am, Ray was driving this time and I sit in the back with Frankie and Meg. They silently whisper to themselves and look back at me.I knew they were all upset. Meg was trying to hold back tears and Frankie was talking to her to hide the pain in his eyes. I couldn't even see how Ray was taking it. I just-I just can't believe that she's gone... m-my child, the love of my life, gone. GONE.
"We're almost to Dr. D's." Ray choked out we all nodded our heads. I couldn't say anything. I would break out into sobs. I had to keep strong. For Kendle. I just wish I hadn't left her side... that I hadn't left her there all alone with Meg. I mean, I trust Meg, I really do, but I've gotta remember how easily it is for Kendle to influence Meg, how easy it is for her to slip away. And to think, this entire time, she was only really an arms leangth away. But I couldn't do anything.
We parked in the middle of the desert and uncovered a hole in the ground, yup, Dr. D has like this underground fortress thing. We never really ask about it, 'cause we really don't wanna know how the hell he built that being in a wheelchair 'nd all.
When we got there I knew Dr. D noticed two people were missing from the group: Mikey and Kendle.
"Um...?" Dr.D was shocked to see another missing person.
I couldn't stand it.
I just couldn't.
It burned my throat to talk.
It was hard to blink my eyes, without letting a single tear escape.
The familiar feeling of loss...the loss of another loved one...
And the bigger feeling of that person...
Never coming back.
It took some effort for me to work up words.
"She's.....She's.....A ship to Mars took her....she's gone." my voice caught up at that instant. It was impossible to stay strong for her. I would, but I had to let it out sometime...
My knees broke under me, and I was on the ground. Meg ran to my side, and I felt a tear drop onto my cheek, but it wasn't mine. It was Meg's. She dropped onto her knees right next to me. I never wanted to get up. Never wanted to stay strong anymore. I had already lost my brother. As if that wasn't hard enough.
...And without both of them, I felt so...so...
Small.
"But...how...? I think everybody here just needs a little time to themselves.....er....some rest, I mean. You can crash here tonight, if that's okay" Dr.D offered. I jumped onto on my knees, Meg's hand on my shoulder.
"NO! WE NEED TO GET HER BACK! AND AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!" I demanded. I felt my ugly side clawing it's way out of my body again.
"GERARD, GERARD! Calm down! We need sleep, anyway. I know this is important, but everybody will feel better in the morning. Sorry, but Kendle's not coming back tomorrow," Frankie tried. A flashed an angry glare in his direction. I sighed in frustration, running my fingers through my tangled hair.
"Fine. Maybe not tomorrow. But as SOON AS POSSIBLE. Let's figure this out in the morning.". Everybody agreed, and we moved on to making some make-shift beds.
'Danm.' I thought.
'Maybe....just maybe...if my heart stopped beating, it wouldn't hurt this much.'.
~~
Three in the morning.
No sleep.
Just thoughts.
Painful, painful thoughts.
I rubbed my eyes that were too stubborn to close.
The regular feeling of emptiness filled me, and stayed there ever since she was stolen. My eyes circled the ones I had left. They had no idea how goddang thankful I was for those beautiful souls.
I dragged my tired body to the ladder, that lead to the hated outdoor world.
---
I am outside, and I've been waiting for the sun.
With my wide eyes, I've seen worlds that don't belong.
---
I painfully watched the darkly clouded horizon, starless and black. This was my breaking point. My moment of mournful sadness, and people that I still couldn't believe...were permanently gone.
---
My mouth is dry with words I cannot verbalize.
Tell me why we live like this.
---
I wanted to shout to the world, to tell it to stop messing my life up. To stop stealing beloved ones right from my hands. But that's Planet Earth for ya'. Screwed up beyond repair....
I remembered being a Killjoy was what I felt I was meant to be. I was so against the whole BLI/nd thing in the first place, because I knew that the control would go way out of hand. And I was right.
Now, I just wanted to quit.
Being a Killjoy didn't feel it like it was worth the risk.
---
Keep me safe inside your arms like towers.
Tower over me.
---
I crossed my arms and shifted my feet uncomfortably. Kendle was always there. Even when she was taken away, it always felt like her spirit was standing right next to me. But, her spirit wasn't enough.
I needed her back into my arms.
And nothing would stop me until I could get that.
---
Cause we are broken.
What must we do to store our essence?
And oh, the promise we adored.
---
This planet is nothing but a broken bone, I tell you. BLI/nd just DESTROYED it. It's like mind-control!! There was one good side of being a Killjoy, and that was not being brainwashed like the rest of most of the human race...and actually being able to feel emotions towards the ones you loved.
---
Give us life again.
Cause we just wanna be home.
---
All I wanted was to be back at the diner again. Just to have everything be safe and sound....to have a somewhat happy life again.
---
Lock the doors, cause I'd like to capture this voice
that came to me tonight.
So everyone would have a choice.
---
I took one long breath, which caught the smell of dusty air. I turned back to the fortress, and climbed the ladder downwards, being careful not to wake anybody. I tiptoed back to my couch, gently laid myself down, and closed my eyes. Sleep was ready to take me over.
I heard something.
It was....what was it?
It sounded like...a mumbling.
A woman's voice!
Maybe it was just Meg talking in her sleep. I flipped my body over so I faced the back of the couch.
It didn't sound like Meg.
It sounded like....like....
"Kendle" I whispered.
My eyes shot open.
'Gerard....Gerard.....can you hear me?.....Gerard---Ger'.
The call sounded staticy and broken apart.
It wasn't just my imagination.
My body shot up like a rocket, and I tiptoed to follow the sound.
I searched high and low...the sound grew farther and farther. I graced over near Dr.D's radio equipment.
It was closer.
Closer, closer, closer! Very close!
It was dark, almost pitch black, but I could make out shapes.
And there I stood, right in front of a boombox that sounded a woman's voice...
Calling my name.
"DOCTOR!!" I yelled. Everybody jolted awake. Dr.D turned on the lights, and wheeled right over to me.
"Really?!? What's so important?" he asked in mid-yawn.
"Listen!" I held the boombox to his ears. He paused and listened to the scratchy static.
"....Kendle.".
---
And under red lights, I'll show myself it wasn't forged.
We're at war.
We live like this....
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