Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Losing My Sight, Losing My Mind, Wish Somebody Would Tell Me I'm Fine
“It’s raining.” Bob pointed out as Lacey smiled, never the pessimist.
“So? Come on.” she said grabbing his hand and pulling him outside where the rain fell as she smiled and looked around the cloudy gray sky.
“Isn’t it beautiful?” she asked him as he shrugged and looked around.
“It’s cold.” he lied as she mocked glared at him.
“It’s Spring, you liar.” she giggled as he smiled at her.
“Why do you love the rain so much anyways?” he asked curiously as she shrugged and looked up.
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s the smell, the way it just sounds. It’s comforting you know?” she replied softly as he nodded and kissed her head.
“Whatever makes you feel better you crazy toad.” he teased as she laughed and slugged his shoulder.
“I need to go pick up a few things, you mind staying with the girls?” she asked.
“You want to go out in the rain? I don’t think that’s a good idea.” he replied.
“It’s just around the corner, I’ll be fine.” she assured him.
“Alright, if you say so.” he replied as she kissed him.
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
~
“Hey babe, just wondering if you’re okay, call me back.”
“Lace, it’s me. I’m calling you for the third time, you’ve been gone a long time, are you okay? Call be me back babe.”
“Lacey, I’m getting worried, where are you?” Bob spoke into his phone as he checked the time and then his cell. No call back, no texts, nothing. He began to pace as he looked outside the window to the increasing volume of rain falling as he felt shivers on his skin. The house rang loudly as he jumped and scrambled to get the phone.
“Lacey?!” he answered into the phone as he heard a different voice.
“Hello? Are you in any relation to Lacey Williams?”
“Yes, I’m her husband. Who’s this?” he asked curiously.
“My name is Alexandra Woods, from Rush University. I’m sorry to tell you, but your wife has been shot.”
Bob woke up in a cold sweat as he sat up and looked around, his heart beating a little faster than usual. The same dream occurring for almost three days now. The dark room was isolated from the sunshine by a blackout curtain. Nothing but silence filled the air as he looked to his left and felt the bed, only to be met with emptiness. He sighed as he stared at the bed where another person should’ve been. The sheets were still wrinkled and when he leaned down, her scent remained trapped in the plush pillow. The smell of Cherry Blossom tortured him as he touched the pillow where his eyes watered again, but he refused.
He was still in his black suit with red tie. He didn’t remember most of the night after he crashed, part of him didn’t want to. The funeral replayed in his mind. It scared him to feel so…numb.
It didn’t help that everywhere he looked was a constant reminder of her. Few clothes scattered on the floor, her black heels in the corner of the room; hell, even the paint on the walls by her. She had her own sense of style, Bob loved this.
He ran a hand through his short blonde hair and scratched at his short beard before heading downstairs, still not caring to change his outfit. He heard a slight shuffle and a woman’s voice. He had almost gotten his hopes up when he thought he heard Lacey’s voice, but it was just his imagination.
“And if it stops raining, then maybe we could go for a walk later, what do you say Mia?” his mother asked as she cradled the baby that looked over her shoulder. She responded by giving a small burp.
“Glad to hear your thoughts.” his mom laughed. “What about you Gia?” she asked to the baby playing with her foot while she looked up at the ceiling and cooing.
“So we agree.” his mom gave a nod as she prepared two bottles. She felt the presence of someone else as she looked up at her son.
“Good morning sweetie.” she said softly to Bob.
“Morning.” he said quietly as she noticed his icy blue eyes were puffy.
“Can I make you anything to eat?” she asked hopefully as he shook his head and sat at the table, looking at his hands while she sighed and nodded in defeat.
“Honey, I’m so sorry.” she whispered as she stood closer to kiss his head. She wiped her eyes before turning back to the twins, something Bob was grateful. He wasn’t sure he was ready to face them just yet.
“You know I have to go back to work soon, but I’ll come by every chance I get. I think maybe you should look into getting a nanny.” she put in, wincing when she saw stiffen in his seat. He almost laughed at the audacity. He didn’t want a stranger raising his children, they needed their mom. It didn’t seem so funny anymore.
“Okay.” he whispered.
“I just want you to have help while you‘re doing your sound tech thing.” she offered as he nodded.
“I know.” he whispered once more, his voice not able to speak any louder. Laura sighed to herself once more before she looked at the twins.
“Well girls, grandma’s off. I’ll be back to see you soon. Be good for your daddy now. I love you both.” she smiled at them as she kissed each of them on the cheek before turning to Bob.
“Are you going to be okay?” she asked him, already knowing the answer as he peeled his eyes away from the counter to look at her.
“I’ll be fine.” he nodded.
“Call me if you need anything, and I mean anything Robert.” she said firmly.
“Yes mom, I know.” he put in as she smiled at him.
“I love you honey.” she whispered before she walked out of the kitchen where he heard the door shut.
He sighed and ran a hand down his face, getting his thoughts together as he looked around. The crying of the baby made him turn his head as he wanted to avoid them for a moment. He shook his head and stood up to scoop up the baby while she nestled into his chest. He tried not to look in her eyes, knowing what he would see.
“It’s okay Gia.” he whispered to her while she settled down. Bob felt it wouldn’t be deep down, but she didn’t have to know that…
When they were both asleep, Bob couldn’t help but watch them as they slept. So innocent, small, and fragile. The heaviness in his heart and stomach settled back in as he thought about Lacey. Instead of being here, she was six feet underground.
His throat felt raw as the reality set in. He was by himself with two little girls who would never see their mom again. He turned his face and closed his eyes for a moment, the sound of a TV making them reopen.
“A resolution has finally been made in the assault case that killed four people, and left one injured. On Monday, a crazed man now identified as Marc Johnson had walked into a supermarket in Darien, Illinois with a loaded gun before he began shooting. Police still aren’t sure what his motive was. Witnesses say Johnson began shooting for no apparent reason while most were trying to find safety. Aaron Rinehart, 21, was of the victims to be killed when he attempted to stop the shooter, but was shot in the stomach and died only moments later before the shooter had shot three more victims. Other victims include Cassie Smith, 25, Jack Sanders, 32, and Lacey Williams-Kingston who was only 22.” The reporter spoke as a picture of the victims appeared on the screen, the last one to be Lacey. Her smile was unmistakable, her eyes sparkling as always.
“Marc Johnson was arrested and is awaiting trial. Our thoughts and prayers go out to the victims’ family at this tragic time.” the reported added as Bob grabbed the remote and shut the TV off quickly, the image of Lacey still stuck in his mind, unable to make it disappear.
The more he tried to avoid it, the more it was thrown back in his face. She was really gone. He had took her from him. He had took her from his children. He felt the guilt sink as he wondered what wouldn't have happened if he made her stay. Would she still be here now?
Bob looked back at the sleeping twins and sighed.
He knew he couldn’t do this alone…
“So? Come on.” she said grabbing his hand and pulling him outside where the rain fell as she smiled and looked around the cloudy gray sky.
“Isn’t it beautiful?” she asked him as he shrugged and looked around.
“It’s cold.” he lied as she mocked glared at him.
“It’s Spring, you liar.” she giggled as he smiled at her.
“Why do you love the rain so much anyways?” he asked curiously as she shrugged and looked up.
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s the smell, the way it just sounds. It’s comforting you know?” she replied softly as he nodded and kissed her head.
“Whatever makes you feel better you crazy toad.” he teased as she laughed and slugged his shoulder.
“I need to go pick up a few things, you mind staying with the girls?” she asked.
“You want to go out in the rain? I don’t think that’s a good idea.” he replied.
“It’s just around the corner, I’ll be fine.” she assured him.
“Alright, if you say so.” he replied as she kissed him.
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
~
“Hey babe, just wondering if you’re okay, call me back.”
“Lace, it’s me. I’m calling you for the third time, you’ve been gone a long time, are you okay? Call be me back babe.”
“Lacey, I’m getting worried, where are you?” Bob spoke into his phone as he checked the time and then his cell. No call back, no texts, nothing. He began to pace as he looked outside the window to the increasing volume of rain falling as he felt shivers on his skin. The house rang loudly as he jumped and scrambled to get the phone.
“Lacey?!” he answered into the phone as he heard a different voice.
“Hello? Are you in any relation to Lacey Williams?”
“Yes, I’m her husband. Who’s this?” he asked curiously.
“My name is Alexandra Woods, from Rush University. I’m sorry to tell you, but your wife has been shot.”
Bob woke up in a cold sweat as he sat up and looked around, his heart beating a little faster than usual. The same dream occurring for almost three days now. The dark room was isolated from the sunshine by a blackout curtain. Nothing but silence filled the air as he looked to his left and felt the bed, only to be met with emptiness. He sighed as he stared at the bed where another person should’ve been. The sheets were still wrinkled and when he leaned down, her scent remained trapped in the plush pillow. The smell of Cherry Blossom tortured him as he touched the pillow where his eyes watered again, but he refused.
He was still in his black suit with red tie. He didn’t remember most of the night after he crashed, part of him didn’t want to. The funeral replayed in his mind. It scared him to feel so…numb.
It didn’t help that everywhere he looked was a constant reminder of her. Few clothes scattered on the floor, her black heels in the corner of the room; hell, even the paint on the walls by her. She had her own sense of style, Bob loved this.
He ran a hand through his short blonde hair and scratched at his short beard before heading downstairs, still not caring to change his outfit. He heard a slight shuffle and a woman’s voice. He had almost gotten his hopes up when he thought he heard Lacey’s voice, but it was just his imagination.
“And if it stops raining, then maybe we could go for a walk later, what do you say Mia?” his mother asked as she cradled the baby that looked over her shoulder. She responded by giving a small burp.
“Glad to hear your thoughts.” his mom laughed. “What about you Gia?” she asked to the baby playing with her foot while she looked up at the ceiling and cooing.
“So we agree.” his mom gave a nod as she prepared two bottles. She felt the presence of someone else as she looked up at her son.
“Good morning sweetie.” she said softly to Bob.
“Morning.” he said quietly as she noticed his icy blue eyes were puffy.
“Can I make you anything to eat?” she asked hopefully as he shook his head and sat at the table, looking at his hands while she sighed and nodded in defeat.
“Honey, I’m so sorry.” she whispered as she stood closer to kiss his head. She wiped her eyes before turning back to the twins, something Bob was grateful. He wasn’t sure he was ready to face them just yet.
“You know I have to go back to work soon, but I’ll come by every chance I get. I think maybe you should look into getting a nanny.” she put in, wincing when she saw stiffen in his seat. He almost laughed at the audacity. He didn’t want a stranger raising his children, they needed their mom. It didn’t seem so funny anymore.
“Okay.” he whispered.
“I just want you to have help while you‘re doing your sound tech thing.” she offered as he nodded.
“I know.” he whispered once more, his voice not able to speak any louder. Laura sighed to herself once more before she looked at the twins.
“Well girls, grandma’s off. I’ll be back to see you soon. Be good for your daddy now. I love you both.” she smiled at them as she kissed each of them on the cheek before turning to Bob.
“Are you going to be okay?” she asked him, already knowing the answer as he peeled his eyes away from the counter to look at her.
“I’ll be fine.” he nodded.
“Call me if you need anything, and I mean anything Robert.” she said firmly.
“Yes mom, I know.” he put in as she smiled at him.
“I love you honey.” she whispered before she walked out of the kitchen where he heard the door shut.
He sighed and ran a hand down his face, getting his thoughts together as he looked around. The crying of the baby made him turn his head as he wanted to avoid them for a moment. He shook his head and stood up to scoop up the baby while she nestled into his chest. He tried not to look in her eyes, knowing what he would see.
“It’s okay Gia.” he whispered to her while she settled down. Bob felt it wouldn’t be deep down, but she didn’t have to know that…
When they were both asleep, Bob couldn’t help but watch them as they slept. So innocent, small, and fragile. The heaviness in his heart and stomach settled back in as he thought about Lacey. Instead of being here, she was six feet underground.
His throat felt raw as the reality set in. He was by himself with two little girls who would never see their mom again. He turned his face and closed his eyes for a moment, the sound of a TV making them reopen.
“A resolution has finally been made in the assault case that killed four people, and left one injured. On Monday, a crazed man now identified as Marc Johnson had walked into a supermarket in Darien, Illinois with a loaded gun before he began shooting. Police still aren’t sure what his motive was. Witnesses say Johnson began shooting for no apparent reason while most were trying to find safety. Aaron Rinehart, 21, was of the victims to be killed when he attempted to stop the shooter, but was shot in the stomach and died only moments later before the shooter had shot three more victims. Other victims include Cassie Smith, 25, Jack Sanders, 32, and Lacey Williams-Kingston who was only 22.” The reporter spoke as a picture of the victims appeared on the screen, the last one to be Lacey. Her smile was unmistakable, her eyes sparkling as always.
“Marc Johnson was arrested and is awaiting trial. Our thoughts and prayers go out to the victims’ family at this tragic time.” the reported added as Bob grabbed the remote and shut the TV off quickly, the image of Lacey still stuck in his mind, unable to make it disappear.
The more he tried to avoid it, the more it was thrown back in his face. She was really gone. He had took her from him. He had took her from his children. He felt the guilt sink as he wondered what wouldn't have happened if he made her stay. Would she still be here now?
Bob looked back at the sleeping twins and sighed.
He knew he couldn’t do this alone…
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