FicWad

Decisions lead to bigger problems
Gerard: Another day. Which meant another day of, facing Frank. I wish I didn't have to be popular maybe then. i'd be friends with him. Having friends is more important though, even if their shit ones. I got ready barely remembering what I was doing.

Mikey had already left, he always did leave before me. In a way mikey was an outsider, maybe that's why he hated me. I remember as kids we used to be so close, we were inseperable. That changed though when I became popular. In a way I missed him, he didn't care what people thought. Mikey was a nerd and wasn't afraid to show it.

At weekends I didn't even try to bond with Mikey no more. I used to say it's all a show for school, but he doesn't even believe that. I still read comics but, I lock myself in my room(which is in the basement). No one knew what I was doing down there.

I slammed the door behind me, my parents were on a buisniss trip. Nothing unusual there. They took pride in their work, done all the hours they could. At the moment they were in Toykyo. Lucky them in a way, they've seen nearly all the world. I've never left New Jersey.

I walked to school, just making everything around me dissaper, and focus on my music, that was blaring through my headphones. I knew i'd have to pull them out but, I let the last line of the song be a comfort. So I could actually get through the whole day.

First lesson was music, the only place I could get away with starting to express myself. I was useless at everything except my singing. Apparantly I was good, that was according to my grandma though. I gave a little low laugh, she was nice to everyone. Probably didn't want to hurt my feelings.

I walked in the classroom, being the first there I was debating singing my song. It was called 'I'm Not Okay(I promise)'. It had taken me just under a year to complete and apparantly, it was good. No one was looking.

Well if you wanted honesty thats all you had to say,
I never want to let you down or have you go,
It's better off this way,
For all the dirty looks the photographs your boyfriend took,
Remember when you broke your foot from jumping out the second floor
I'm not o...

Some one had walked in the room, and class didn't start for another 5 minutes. I turned around to see Frank, his beauty radiating from him. God he was so freaking gorgeous, his eyes were pretty aswell. I couldn't do this though.

Frank:
Shit I didn't know it was him singing. I was walking along the corridor, thinking i'd be the first one here. Or find someone else not Gee. I never knew he had a voice like that, and I htink they were orginal lyrics aswell.

I probably looked like a rights freak now, not like I never looked any different to him. Gerard started at me vaccantly and I swear I saw him smile. Maybe it was just me. I think reality soon hit him though, and who I was. A crowd had started to gather outside the class. This wasn't going to end well.

"You freak, you had to walk in on me. You knew I was in here, and I had my shirt of." Gerard came towards me and I gasped he was lieing. Why though?
"No you fucking didn't you little dick head." Gerard lunged at me, and the next thing I knew we were fighting. I didn't struggle after about 30 seconds. I registered the fact that I liked him and didn't want to hurt him.

I closed my eyes as the students, chanted fight over and over. Each punch Gerard landed on my face, was an extra cut i'd do later. So far he was on 15.

"Gerard Way what are you doing." The teacher had walked in just, before Gerard landed the eighteenth punch on me. My eyes were stinging and I knew it was only a matter of time before I cried.

The teacher pulled Gerard off, and with all my energy I got up. I couldn't help myself I walked to the teacher and as, he turned his back I landed a punch right on Gerard's nose.

I heard his nose crack and I felt so bad after. I looked into his eyes and smirked, maybe he'd leave me alone now.
"Frank Iero, Gerard Way Headmasters office now." I nodded knowing it was better to go, then refuse.

I picked up all my stuff and walked out of the classroom, not caring if Gerard was following or not. My heart felt heavy, I knew I never had a chance with Gerard before, but in my fantasy world I did. Not even in that did I have a shot anymore.

My eyes pricked and a few tears were released. I wasn't ready for a huge crying jag, i'd do that tonight. I had 17 cuts I had to catch up on. I tried not to think of the blood running out of my veins. I was tempted enough to do it at school. It's not like I didn't have my razor blade. I tookk it everywhere, wherever I went it went.

Maybe i'd go to the headmasters and then i'd do it in the bathroom, before lesson change. I looked at the floor, I was doing the cuts for Gerard, every puch that he landed on me was a rip in my heart.

All my thoughts had distracted me and the next thing I knew I was seated outside Mr. Ramsey's office.
"Frank Iero and Gerard Way you can come through now." I hadn't noticed Gerard, but his nose was crooked and it was pretty bloody. I hadn't meant to hit him that hard. In a way I was prod though he, got a taste of his own medicene.

I followed Gerard into the room which I hadn't really been in much. Maybe once or twice a year that's all.

"So Mr. Iero and Mr. Way you got into a fight am I right?" we both nodded and stayed quiet, sometimes this was the best policy to get out of shit.
"Well I think you both should be suspended for 2 days. So come back on thursday. Before you argue Mr. Way no I do not want to know why, I simply know that we do not tolerate fighting and you both did it. Now go." I nodded and walked out I think Gerard was hot on my heels.

I walked out of school they had already contacted my parents damn I was in shit. Oh well it was self defense in a way. For once I wasn't listening to my music. I was enjoying the scilence before the pain tonight. Behind me I could hear footsteps, before I went inside I looked as to who had been following me. It had been Gerard. I watched him go up the street and go up the path 4 houses down from mine.

Did he really live that close?

"Frank Anthony Iero jr, what the fuck have you done to be excluded."
"I broke some guys nose when I punched him. It was purely in self defense though. He landed 17 on me before he stopped." My mom nodded and added that I had a black eye so maybe it was good, that I had some time off. I nodded and went straight to the bathroom to do the dirty deed.

Fuck that one was deep. I got the toilet paper and started to apply pressure I had finished my last one and it had been deeper than intended. The feeling though was like an electric current. As the blood trickled down my arm I felt free. Like all the bad was being released from my body along with all my emotions.

The bleeding slowed and it was slow enough for me to stop applying pressure. I cried and waited till I had stopped. So many things were running through my head. I waked to my bedroom and sat down on my bed. I reached under and grabbed my diary.

Dear Diary, My arm hurts, It's stinging so much. I had to do it though. They were all for Gerard. He really hurt me today and I wish I could rewind time. I'm sorry Gerard are the words I wish I had the courage to say. I won't do anymore tonight. I'm too sore and I wanna suffer this pain.
Love Frankie xoxo