FicWad

Arrangement
Gerard:
Days were turning into weeks, and each one passed in a blur. Not a day went by where Frankie wasn't in a thought. I had figured it out though, I had to be friends with him. I know he probably hated me after all that I did but, I had to have him in my life.

Mikey and I had been talking a lot more, maybe to the fact that I wasn't such a jerk anymore. I had started to sing at home and make songs, again with Mikey. I had a new friend called Ray Toro aswell. He was cool, played guitar and had a 'fro.

Ray knew that I liked Frank and he understood that, I had hurt him many times though. I remember the day I told Ray this, I broke down. Him and Mikey were the only ones that knew I was gay. I planned to keep it that way aswell.

I sighed and got out of bed it was a Wednesday, half way through the week. Facing Frank everyday was getting harder, and in PE the otherday I saw cuts on his arms. I hoped it wasn't anything to do with me. Part of myself held me responsible though.

At that moment when I saw them, I wanted to hug him ask him why, he would do something to his gorgeous self. In my head I played the scene over and over again, just wanting to know what it would be like to touch him.

I got changed in a hurry and ran to school, I was going to be late I knew it. That would mean I'd have to sit next to Frankie. That was something I hadn't done since the incident on Halloween...his birthday I cringed. Maybe I could try to make amends. I smiled and walked casually into school.

"Sorry i'm late miss." I apologized before I got asked why I didn't. I was right there was only one space left, next to Frankie. I was happy about this I was going to make amends weather he liked it, or not.


I sat down and Frank almost instantly pulled his chair as far away as possible. I frowned, he wasn't making this easy for me. I sighed and settled sending a note instead.

heyy, look Frank I know you hate me but i'm sorry.

I passed the note to him and gave him a look, which I hoped was apologetic. He looked at me shaked his head and wrote back. I know knew this wasn't going to be easy.

Sorry don't cut it after what you did to me on my birthday.

He shoved the note back and I half regretted sending it. I couldn't stop now though I was about to get myself into something, something that might not end well.

Frank:
He expected a note to fix it all. A simple sorry, when I knew fucking well he probably didn't mean it.

I felt a little harsh as I shoved the reply back, but it had to be done. Just because I loved him doesn't mean he gets away with everything.

Look Frank what I did was wrong. I know that but please accept my apology I mean it with everything I have.

I gave a smile and bit my lip, I hope that wasn't over the top. Oh well what's done is done.

Okay Gerard, but we need to talk so we either talk at school or round mine after school. I know which one your prefer.

He sighed and I knew what the answer would be. Neither probably, but I had to give him an option.

Round yours. Talk to you then. Keep the note for just I dunno... By the way smile ok =] xx

I smiled and he punched my leg playfully, and then froze. I mouthed the words it's okay and we both smiled and supressed a laugh.

Gerard:
He was smiling, something he hadn't done in awhile and it made my heart skip beats. It set off his brown eyes amazingly. I wish he'd be happy more often, i'd probably have a heart attack though.

I was going around his tonight, not for long though and I probably wouldn't even go in. I started humming I'm Not Okay to myself, it always made me feel better.

I looked at Frankie and something about him was new. I looked at his hands and realized he had Halloween now written on them. It was pretty cool I have to admit.

I hated needles, how could he get that done. Needles are just a no go, when I was in hospital a couple of years ago I made a fuss when they had to inject me. The memory made me laugh and Frank looked at me and smiled again. God they really should put a warning sign on that boy.

The lesson ended and I walked past Frank our bodies touched briefly and I was shocked by what I felt. I think Frank felt it too, but I turned that shock into the fact that I loved him. Surely he didn't feel for me, we were arch enemies, well until tonight hopefully.

"Heyy Gee let's get that Frank kid again. He looks all healed up." No I wasn't going to hurt him again, not now not ever. I promised myself that.

"No Matt not today okay lets just leave him for awhile." I think Matt understood the sincerity in my voice. He nooded and started to flirt with some of the girls. It was disguasting. Next thing I knew he was making out with Jess. They wern't dating but I knew they had sex together.

It was disgusting but then I would say that i'm gay. I started to laugh and everyone looked at me. I noticed Frank sitting under the tree on the field. Looking at me and smiling. Maybe losing these people were woth it, just to see him smile.

I continued looking at Frank analysing his every move. At times he would bring his knees up to his chest and look afraid. Maybe I was the reason for him being scared.

Then he did something that caught my eye he started rubbing his arm. Had he cut himself more. I'd find out tonight and with that a tear ran down my cheek.