Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Living In a World Without You
Frank’s POV
My eyes grew wide with fear. Everyone in the room was completely frozen. The last thing this band needed was to go on tour with The Used again. I absolutely hated Bert McCracken for giving Gerard those drugs. He was absolutely awful, I mean Gerard was already an alcoholic and was addicted to antidepressants what kind of person could you be to give him cocaine? I hated him.
“The Used? What? No, abso-fucking-lutely not! Brian, do you not remember what happened when Gerard and Bert got together?” I screamed, I don’t remember the last time I was this angry.
“Yeah Brian, what the fuck?” Ray asked confused
This was then followed by Ray and Mikey babbling about the past and repeating “Fuck” a bunch of times. I looked over at Gerard and realized he hadn’t said anything; he just sat there emotionless with a hungry look in his eyes. I was confused by this.
“Shut the fuck up!” Brian yelled over the ruckus. “You guys have nothing to worry about, I talked to the band and they all said that Bert has been clean for a year now. And even if he hasn’t been, Gerard is strong enough to overcome any temptation he may have to drink or do drugs again. Right Gerard?”
Gerard didn’t say anything. He just sat there with same look he had a few moments ago when I had glanced at him. I hope he was okay. I wonder what he was thinking about.
I stared into his eyes; there was a sparkle there that filled his face with life, and for some reason it made me feel weak. A wave of guilt spread over my body, if I had just helped him instead of ignored him while he was drunk he would have never moved on to cocaine. Although I hated Bert for giving him the drugs, I felt in some way that it was partially my fault.
He glanced up, noticing that I was starring him and our eyes met for just a moment before he blushed before standing up quickly and scrambling to the back of the bus. Well that was weird, had I done something to upset him? I’d better go talk to him, he’s my best friend in the whole world and I didn’t want any tension between us; so I followed him. I saw him crawl into his bunk so I decided to crawl in after him. There wasn’t very much room, but I enjoyed being close to him.
“Hey Gee, are you feeling okay? You’ve barely said a word to any of us.” He let out a huge breath that he seemed to be holding.
“Uhm yeah I'm fine. I've just got a lot on my mind right now.” He sounded stressed. I wrapped my arms around him, embracing him and resting my hand on his chest.
“Do you wanna talk about it?” I breathed him in.
“Uhh no, n-not really. I'm kind of tired; I think I'm going to take a nap.” As he said this, I noticed that his heart began to pick up speed, pounding hard against the hand I laid on his chest. Was he nervous?
“Okay well I'm here if you want to talk. I’ll wake you up when we get to the venue” I gripped him tighter before slipping out of the bunk and heading back to the front. Did I make him uncomfortable? I mean, we do that kind of stuff all the time. Something must be really wrong.
*
We arrived at the venue 5 hours later, everyone anxiously ran off the bus for our first sound check. I headed to the back of the bus to wake up Gerard. I stared at his peaceful body for a few moments before realizing that he was breathing abnormally heavy. Was he having a nightmare? He moaned. Oh my god, okay he's having a sex dream! I didn’t want to hear the rest of what might happen so I immediately shook him awake and he shot upright, almost hitting his head on the top of the bunk.
I smirked “You were having a sex dream?” I said, slightly teasing. It was more of a statement than a question, but he moaned, what other kind of dream could it have been? His cheeks turned a deep shade of red, this made me laugh. “Oh come on buddy, it’s nothing to be ashamed about. So you will deal a brother a hint, who’s the lucky dude?”
He climbed out of the bunk and grabbed his stage clothes. “It was no one” He brushed it off nervously.
“It had to be somebody, tell-“ He cut me off “Can we just drop it Frank!” He said this more assertive than angry but it hurt a little.
What was up with him? It couldn’t have just been the Bert issue because he seemed out of it when we picked him up at his house. I hated it when my best friend wasn’t able to tell me something.
My eyes grew wide with fear. Everyone in the room was completely frozen. The last thing this band needed was to go on tour with The Used again. I absolutely hated Bert McCracken for giving Gerard those drugs. He was absolutely awful, I mean Gerard was already an alcoholic and was addicted to antidepressants what kind of person could you be to give him cocaine? I hated him.
“The Used? What? No, abso-fucking-lutely not! Brian, do you not remember what happened when Gerard and Bert got together?” I screamed, I don’t remember the last time I was this angry.
“Yeah Brian, what the fuck?” Ray asked confused
This was then followed by Ray and Mikey babbling about the past and repeating “Fuck” a bunch of times. I looked over at Gerard and realized he hadn’t said anything; he just sat there emotionless with a hungry look in his eyes. I was confused by this.
“Shut the fuck up!” Brian yelled over the ruckus. “You guys have nothing to worry about, I talked to the band and they all said that Bert has been clean for a year now. And even if he hasn’t been, Gerard is strong enough to overcome any temptation he may have to drink or do drugs again. Right Gerard?”
Gerard didn’t say anything. He just sat there with same look he had a few moments ago when I had glanced at him. I hope he was okay. I wonder what he was thinking about.
I stared into his eyes; there was a sparkle there that filled his face with life, and for some reason it made me feel weak. A wave of guilt spread over my body, if I had just helped him instead of ignored him while he was drunk he would have never moved on to cocaine. Although I hated Bert for giving him the drugs, I felt in some way that it was partially my fault.
He glanced up, noticing that I was starring him and our eyes met for just a moment before he blushed before standing up quickly and scrambling to the back of the bus. Well that was weird, had I done something to upset him? I’d better go talk to him, he’s my best friend in the whole world and I didn’t want any tension between us; so I followed him. I saw him crawl into his bunk so I decided to crawl in after him. There wasn’t very much room, but I enjoyed being close to him.
“Hey Gee, are you feeling okay? You’ve barely said a word to any of us.” He let out a huge breath that he seemed to be holding.
“Uhm yeah I'm fine. I've just got a lot on my mind right now.” He sounded stressed. I wrapped my arms around him, embracing him and resting my hand on his chest.
“Do you wanna talk about it?” I breathed him in.
“Uhh no, n-not really. I'm kind of tired; I think I'm going to take a nap.” As he said this, I noticed that his heart began to pick up speed, pounding hard against the hand I laid on his chest. Was he nervous?
“Okay well I'm here if you want to talk. I’ll wake you up when we get to the venue” I gripped him tighter before slipping out of the bunk and heading back to the front. Did I make him uncomfortable? I mean, we do that kind of stuff all the time. Something must be really wrong.
*
We arrived at the venue 5 hours later, everyone anxiously ran off the bus for our first sound check. I headed to the back of the bus to wake up Gerard. I stared at his peaceful body for a few moments before realizing that he was breathing abnormally heavy. Was he having a nightmare? He moaned. Oh my god, okay he's having a sex dream! I didn’t want to hear the rest of what might happen so I immediately shook him awake and he shot upright, almost hitting his head on the top of the bunk.
I smirked “You were having a sex dream?” I said, slightly teasing. It was more of a statement than a question, but he moaned, what other kind of dream could it have been? His cheeks turned a deep shade of red, this made me laugh. “Oh come on buddy, it’s nothing to be ashamed about. So you will deal a brother a hint, who’s the lucky dude?”
He climbed out of the bunk and grabbed his stage clothes. “It was no one” He brushed it off nervously.
“It had to be somebody, tell-“ He cut me off “Can we just drop it Frank!” He said this more assertive than angry but it hurt a little.
What was up with him? It couldn’t have just been the Bert issue because he seemed out of it when we picked him up at his house. I hated it when my best friend wasn’t able to tell me something.
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