FicWad

GERARD'S P.O.V.
"Morning guys." Frank mumbled, flicking on the coffee machine- still seemingly unaware of his raging hard on.
"Uhhh...Please tell me you two haven't been looking at Ray's porn together?" Mikey pleaded, looking at our waists down.
"What? No. We've just been lying in the bunk together." Frank said, a confused look gracing his face as Ray, Bob and Mikey were all looking at the issue in his pants. Frank looked down. "Uhhh, shit, I thought I felt wierd." He muttered as Ray and Bob burst out laughing.
"Great. Frank's getting boners over my brother." Mikey muttered, looking disgusted. "We all knew Gee was gay, but Frank too. Well..."
"WHAT!?"I screamed, "How the hell did you know?"
"It was just obvious, I'm your brother. I know everything." Mikey smirked and I gulped. Everything? Did he know how I felt about Frank??
"I didn't say anything, Gee! I promise!" Ray said, he already knew. When I said my best friends didn't know I was gay, I meant the rest of them- apart from Ray. I had to tell someone and Ray was an amazing secret keeper, so I told him, I even told him about Frank.
"I know Ray. You guys just know me too well... You figure everything out." I murmered, grabbing my coffee and automatically sitting down next to Frank, across the table from Ray, Bob and Mikey were on the sofa.
Frank shuffled closer and stuck his head on my shoulder, letting out a sigh and closing his eyes.
"I'm so tired." He whispered.
"Why? Didn't you sleep well?" I hushed back, so Ray couldn't hear.
"I was too worried about you to sleep." He admitted, snuggling further into the crook of my neck and I put my arm around him.
"I'm sorry Frankie." I told him. He shouldn't worry about me, there was nothing to worry about. Okay so the death of Helena hit me hard and it would take me a while to get over it- but I wasn't going to slip into any old habits, of that I was certain.
"Don't be." He said as he drifted off to sleep. Bob and Mikey were too engrossed in their laptops after they had gone to the front to notice, but Ray gave a quick smirk before saying, "Do you want me to help you carry him into the back lounge?"
"Nah, Ray. I'm on it." I picked Frank up, cradling his small form in my arms like an over muscled, inked and pierced baby, before walking into the back room and putting him down on the sofa. After a few minutes, he seemed to notice his heat source was gone and started shaking.
"Gee?" He murmered. "GEE!" He screamed, "Don't leave me, please! I need you!" He shrieked, burying his face into the couch cusion, obviously having a nightmare. "GERARD!" He yelled, causing Ray and Mikey to run into the back room.
"Shhhhh! He's sleeping." I hushed them, the worried looks on their faces turning into frowns.
"Why the hell is he yelling for you and why the hell aren't you holding him?" Mikey growled.
"Uhhh. I don't know, do you normally shout for your best friend like that in your sleep? Would it be wierd if I did, uhh, like hold him?" I asked.
"He wants you, so be there. Like he said. He needs you." Ray explained, as him and Mikey rolled his eyes like I'd just asked if the sky was really blue. Without a further word I walked over to Frank, who seemed to be whimpering and thrashing around in his sleep, and hugged him tight against me on the couch.
"I'm here Frank, I'm here." I soothed, rubbing his back.
"Gee, it's Mikey." He murmered, "Somethings up with him." He was still asleep, the others had told me of Frank's sleep talking, he often confesses things in his sleep and so far they have always been true.
"What is it?" I asked, my voice low and quiet.
"He's not eating again. He hasn't eaten in three days." Frank murmered, burying his face in my t-shirt. I had a feeling something was up with Mikey, but I couldn't put my finger on it. It had been so long since he'd done something stupid like this that it didn't even cross my mind. I should have realised- I'm his big brother after all.
"Thank you for telling me Frank." I told him as I drifted off to sleep myself, I'd have to deal with Mikey later...

"GERARD, FRANK! WAKE UP! IT'S TIME TO GO ON!" Mikey yelled, as me and Frank jolted up right, someone had placed a black fluffy comforter over us which I recognised as Bob's.
"Shit! Where's Pansy?" Frank jumped up and over me.
"Here." Ray said, handing him his guitar or 'pansy' as he liked to call it.
"Thanks, come on Gee!" Frank yelled, grabbing my hand and running out of the bus, pulling me all the way to the stage.
The show passed in a bit of a haze, there was one of our famous 'Frerard' moments in you know what they do to guys like us in prison, as I made all the boys in the room take off their shirts and wave them above their heads like animals. Much to Ray and Mikey's amusement, some of the girls did too. Bob was too busy thrashing his drumkit to notice. I did notice that Mikey held hiss bass away from him slightly, like it was going to bruise him, and he wore a large, baggy hoodie which I recognised as Ray's. Frank was even more hyperactive than usual, kicking things over and jumping, head banging and spitting everywhere. He always put all he had into a show, but tonight, he was putting in more. It was like it was the last show of the tour, then it dawned on me, it was! I then realised that we were also nearly at the end of our last song, Helena.
I belted ou the last verse of Helena with as much energy and oxeygen as humanly possible, this song was always dedicated to my Grandma, but now it was like a story of her funeral- just like in the music video we'd recorded. So many emotions were running through me just by singing this that I knew as soon as I got offstage I would collapse, once again, into Frank's shoulder. Everything had changed since the band started, it always used to be Mikey. If I was upset or had a nightmare, I'd crawl in with Mikey, if I was crying, it would always be Mikey to give me a shoulder to cry on and tell me that it was going to be okay. Now it's Frank, when we were in the van, it was everyone- there wasn't enough room for it to be just one person, but now we had the bunks in the tour bus it was always Frank.
"THANKYOU LONDON! YOU'VE BEEN AMAZING! STAY SAFE!" I yelled as we all ran off the stage. I got halfway through the carpark when the inevitable tears started to fall, my breathing becoming heavy with the running and the tears. I really needed to start exercising and stop smoking- but I hate excercise and I love smoking, so that's never gonna happen.
"Gee, you okay? Mikey, Ray and Bob are gonna go over to Fallout Boy's tourbus for a bit." Frank caught up to me, and noticed I was crying, "Awwww, Gee. Please don't cry. It was the last show, we can go home." He soothed, which only made me cry more, if I was home- I was away from Frank, and away from the distractions for my feelings towards Frank which were becoming more and more intense. Frank picked me up and cradled me like a baby- just the same as I'd done to him at breakfast this morning and carried me inside the bus to the back.
"Heyy, what's wrong?" He asked, wiping away my tears with his hoodie sleeve.
"I don't know." I admitted, I was so confused I really didn't.
"Is it Helena?" He asked, his face crinkling in concern.
"Partly, but she's in a better place now, and I'm happy for her- God, that sounds bad. But it's just everything, I'm not sure who I am anymore, who am I Frank? Please tell me." I sobbed, colllapsing into his chest and curling up in a ball on his lap, his strong arms wrapped tightly around me.
"You are you, GeeGee. There's no other way to explain you- your the most amazing best friend I could wish to have, your an epic brother, you have the voice of a thousand fallen angles, you can't play guitar if your life depended on it, your everybodys hero, your an inspiration, a glimmer of hope, your loved Gee. Your an amazing artist and your incredibly and inhumanly creative, your always bursting with brilliant new ideas, everything means something to you, your favourite book, your favourite comic or even the bass line of your favourite song, you analyse everything and you figure out what it means. I can't tell you how lucky I feel to have such an amazing person in my life." Frank soothed, his voice filled with such honesty as he rocked me gently.
"How do you always know exactly what to say? Your more amazing than you give yourself credit for, Frankie." I murmered, the tears subsiding as the others returned to the bus, I went to get off his lap but he held me on.
"Frank, Gerard, where are you?" Ray called as he and the other two trudged towards the back room.
"In here." Frank called back as they entered the room.
Heyy, we're gonna play Donkey Kong. Wanna join?" Bob asked as he eyed me and Frankie with a suspicious look gracing his face.
"Nah, we were just off to bed." Frankie anwsered, grinning.
"Okay, you go play Donkey Kong and you go to bed Frank, I need to have a word with Mikey." I said, standing up off his lap.
"Bah! I liked you there, it was warm." He muttered, forcing laughs out of Bob, Ray, Mikey and even me. "What? It was!" He huffed as he walked off to the bunks and Ray and Bob exited after him.
"What is it Gee?" Mikey asked as we both flopped down on the couch.
"You haven't eaten in three days, Frank told me in bhis sleep." I smiled grimly, waiting for a reply.
"I told them not to say anything- you'd only worry." He muttered, sitting back into the couch.
"Why Mikey, why?" I asked.
"I just forgot, what with it being the end of the tour, you were acting a bit off and then we got the news about Helena, I was just worried you'd slipped back into some old habits." He told me, it was easy for me to tell if Mikey was lying or not- and he was telling the truth.
"Well I havent, I promise. BUT I don't want you to slip into any old habits either." I told him, and he could tell I was telling the truth- I guess it was a brother thing.
"Good, and I wont. Fallout boy have just given me a donner kebab which, I am proud to say, I polished off in three minutes flat." He grinned.
"I thought I could smell garlic, right. I'm off to bed, I can't wait to see the look on Frank's face tommorrow!" I said, getting up and heading to the bunks.
"Night Gee Bear!" Mikey called as he wandered off to play donkey kong.
"Night MikeyMouse!" I called back, wandering into the bunks. I immediately started paniking, Frank wasn't in his bunk, he always left the curtain open slightly when he slept so we could see him, but he wasn't there.
"Frank?" I asked.
"Uhhh. Shit." He muttered as his head popped out from my bunk curtain, he looked like he'd been crying.
" Okay, one- why are you up there and two- what's up." I asked, crawling into the bunk with him.
"I don't know, I felt like I needed to cry. And when ever I need to cry I go to your bunk, it smells like you and it has your things in it... it comforts me." He hung his head in shame.
"Why don't you just come to me in person, like I come to you?" I asked.
"I didn't want you to think I was insecure." He whispered, a few stray tears escaping further.
"I would never think that Frankie. Deep down, we're all insecure, but we are friends, we help each other through these things." I told him, rubbing his arm in support.
"I'll definately come to you next time." He told me, his voice filled with conviction.
"I hope there wont be a next time, I don't want to see you cry. But if there is, you come straight to me okay?"
"Okay, Gee. Can I sleep with you again tonight?" He asked, using the unnecassary cute card.
"Sure." We smiled, "Hold on, every time I come off tour one of my shirts always goes missing, the one I wear on the last night, do you take that home with you?" I asked, smirking so bad I thought my face would split.
"Yeah, youn don't mind do you?" He asked, frowning.
"Course I don't, no c'mere." I said, pulling him down into a hug with me. We fell asleep like that, holding on tightly to our best friend, our brother and in my case; would-be-lover.