FicWad

Frank's POV (It might change soon but I like writing as Frankie)

"Right so about this band." Gee started, I was still a bit shocked that we were actually goning to do this. "Well mae and Frank thought, maybe we should start it now." If Mikey said no, would we still go along and do it? I didn't know.

"YES GEE!" Mikey shouted and threw his arms around his big brother then around me. I don't think he could be happier.
"Guys, sorry to be a party pooper but don't we need a drummer and another guitar player?" I hated to rain on their parade. Gee's face dropped but Mikey's stayed smiling. I sometimes wonder what was up with that kid.
"Well, I have 2 friends."
"OMG Mikey has friends awww." I laughed at Gee's statement and Mikey gave the finger to us both.
"Yes douche bag I do, and their names are Ray Toro and Bob Bryar." I knew Ray Toro he was in my guitar lessons I took at schoo. He was amazing if it wasn't impossible, I would've said he was born playing guitar. Yes he was that good.

"I know Toro, he's in my guitar lessons. Has an afro right?" I just wanted to make sure it was who I thought it was, I'd be embarassed it it wasn't.
"Yes Toro has a fro...princess fro fro." he mumbled that last bit under his brath and laughed. It was probably an inside joke.
"Well then yes, if he agrees to it we should definately get him involved. Is that Bryar kid big and scary aswell?" I had a feeling I had probably seen Mikey and his friends before now. They did go to our school after all, and seeing Bob had always stopped me going over to Ray and saying heyy.
"He looks it, but he's a teddybear." we both laughed and Gee suddenly started tapping his foot. It was kind of cute.

"You two finished the mother's meeting yet?" I rolled my eyes and nodded.
"Oh what does Bryar play?"
"Drums!" Gee and Mikey both looked at me as if it was obvious. I hit my palm with my head and mumbled something about being dropped on my head as a baby, and lead painted crib bars.

"What was that! Oh Frankie I do love you" next thing I knew I was in Gee's arms. I knew he didn't mean it seriously when he said whe loved me but, it still made my heart sprint.

Too soon he released and looked at me. I gave the best smile I could. As long as he is happy Frank. As long as he is happy. As long as he is happy. I felt a tear escape and Gee's thumb brushed it away. He gave me a puzzling look and I just smiled.

"It's nothing disappointed my parents haven't called me y'know." he nodded and headed into the kitchen. Our christmas dinner was going to be pizza. That's how cool we were.

"You know what guys, it's stopped snowing." I ran into the kitchen and looked out of the window. It honestly had. It was a winter wonderland out there. Icicles were hanging from the swing, that was in the back yard and It was just beautiful. I looked at Gee next to me and just smiled. I knew he couldn't be mine, I might just have to grow to respect that.

The rest of that last week passed in a blur, we played D&D and read comics. Gee and I came up with more songs and Mikey rang up Ray and Bob.

Flashback
"So Toro do you want to be the second guitarist in our band?" I was nervous Mikey had rang up Bob who had agreed and now it was only Ray. Mikey's face dropped and so did my heart now. Gee looked on the loor and was probably still hoping for a positive outcome. I knew there wouldn't be one. Mikey hung up and had a disappointed look on his face.
"Well....he's umm he's IN" my mouth dropped open and I went and rugby tackled Mikey. He really was a dick at times, and that's why I loved him. Gee jumped on top of me and we all laughed. This is how it was meant to be. I pushed Gee off and sat on the floor, I suddenly kissed him. Shit I wasn't meant to do that. I got up and left. Leaving all my stuff behind.
End of flashback

I hadn'y talked to him since. I had turned off my phone and locked the front door, so he couldn't just walk in. Gee had been knocking a few times a day along with Mikey, who would knock every freaking ten minutes. I knew I could never face them again, but i'd have to at school. Maybe I could hang around with Mikey, Ray and Bob. I knew that Mikey wasn't affected in this matter, it was purely between me and Gee.

I slipped down into just my boxers and curled up in a ball on my bed. I felt so alone. My parents still wern't home and they hadn't even called me. I was pratically orphaned. Thinking about it now, they should've been home two days ago. I hadn't heard from them since they left either. I started to panic, hyperventilation kicked in and so did the sweating.

I layed there sobbing like a pansy, before I had a thought. I got up and headed to my parents room. I opened up their wardrobe it was empty, along with the bath room, and even the duvet had no cover on it. I opened the final drawer in my moms dresser, hoping i'd see her favourite jewellrey or something. Nothing except a note.

Dear Frankie, if you're readign this then you've decided to go through my drawers. I always knew you were nosey. Did you wonder the reason why we got you a guitar for your birthday? It's because it's the last thing we'll ever get you. Me and your father have moved to Australia and do not plan on coming back. We have been planning this for ages, and have a house out there and everything. Don't try to contact us, we brought the house so you don't need to pay rent or anything.
From M+D

I screwed up the letter and went into their en-suite bathroom. I punched the mirror and watched it shatter, like my life around me. I needed Gee, I needed to feel safe in his arms. I fell to the floor and picked up one of the shattered pieces of glass. Would it matter if I died now? What was there to live for? Gee hated me and would be with someone else soon. That was the love of my life gone, withing one second.

I took off my top and started to cut my torso. Who cared if I was scarred, no one would want me. I let out a whimper of pain and once I was covered in cuts I dropped the bloody piece of glass. With that darkness.

I woke up and I was alive. What a disappointment. I sat up and remembered my chest, because of the pain that shot through my body. I looked doen to my chest, there had to be at least 30 cuts maybe more. I got off the floor and walked to my room. I wa slucjy I had a spare uniform blazer included, as mine was still at Gee's, along with my clothes.

I pulled on my uniform and smuged some black eyeliner and red eyeshadow under my eyes. It should hide the bags that were starting to form, as I was tired.

I grabbed my iron maiden bag, out of my closet as my misfit one was at Gee's. I didn't even have the courage to get my bag from his. I was such a pussy.

"By mom, bye day." I managed to say before, my brain caught up with me and reality hit. My parents wern't here they'd abandoned me. I wucikly laced up my converse grabbed the keys and walked outside. The sulight hurt my eyes. It wasn't strong, but i'd been in darkness for at least 5 days.

My chest hurt and I knew I shouldn't of come out but I had to. Gee would ask so many questions I could hear them all now. Iero are you gay? Haha are you honestly a fag? I knew Gee could be nasty, he'd said it was all an act but did I believe him. I grabbed the phone out of my pocket and turned it on.
55 messages, 109 missed calls, 58 voicemails. Nearly all of them were from Gee except a few from Mikey. I loved them both so much, and I can't believe i've probably put them through hell. It was who I am though. I'm never going to make it in life. I just had to keep my head up high and keep going on. There had to be a light at the end of the tunnel? I took in a deep breath and walked into school. So torture begins.