Each boy feels like they have reached the end of the road with no where else to hide.You can't get another try..
Adrenaline. Pulsing through my veins.
I pulled away from Mikey who looked at me, concern reflecting through his eyes. He started to panic. I noticed his chest heaving up and down. Faster and Faster.
My mouth hung open, unable to make a sound, barely able to breath.
What did I do!?
It would have been better if I hadn't liked it. It would have been better if I had just pushed him away from the start.
He looked at me. He was afraid.
My eyes and mouth remained open wide before I blinked, tears welling up in my eyes. Gerard was just downstairs, what if he found out? He would never look at me the same again..
"I..I-I.." I managed to stumble over a few unclear noises, a single tear traced down my cheek.
"Frank don't cry" He said blankly.
He went in to wipe the tear that dropped from my face but I stepped back and out of his reach.
"F-Frank." He pleaded.
I shook my head violently. Still unable to speak.
I stepped back again and he watched. I kept taking unstable steps backwards shaking my head slowly untill I felt my heal hit his door.
"N-No" My voice found me.
"I-I have t-to go, I-I have to I-I'm sorry." I quickly spun around and pulled the door open and shut it behind me.
I heard Mikey kick something and curse loudly. My intakes of breath quickened and I ran down the stairs past the living room where Gerard sat.
"How's Mikes?" He asked turning his head to face me. I didn't stop walking, I would have no explanation for Gerard as to why tears are falling from my eyes.
"Fine." I said shortly, relieved that my voice held no trace of a whimper.
"Frank? What's wrong?"
"Nothing" I opened the front door and ran down the path leading to the sidewalk. The rain still fell and the chilly breeze still flowed through the silent streets. The smell of wet pavement and car exausts roamed the air, making breathing even harder than it already is. I pulled my Smashing Pumpkins hoodie over my head and started running down their road.
"Hey!" I heard fast footsteps come closer to me. I didn't stop running.
"Frankie stop!" Gerard caught up to me and grapped my arm, pulling me to face him.
He looked at me, his hair stuck to his face and the rain rolled down his face.
"Gerard, go inside, it's raining"
"Frank, what is it?" he asked, ignoring me.
"Really Gee, don't worry about it."
"Do you expect me to just forget about it and let you leave me like this?"
"N-No, Its not that. Please can we talk about it tomorrow?"
"Nope, don't even try get out of this, Frankie" His voice was stern, but genually caring.
I let emptiness take over, being drenched in my pain again. My breathing was still more rapid than usual and I felt myself grow dizzy. Like I was too high off the ground. I stumbled backwards.
"Frank? Are you okay?" Gee grabbed my arm to help me regain stablebility.
"I'll be fine"
"You don't look it. Please, let me take you inside. You shouldn't be out when you're like this."
"No!" I said a little too quickly, I don't want to go back to the Way's house, not now anyway, not after what happened. Gee noticed my quick responce.
"Well how are you going to get home then? Walk? You'll colaspe on the road! Come on" He pulled my arm over his shoulder and helped me walk back to his. It wasn't long before a numbing sensation swept through my veins.
Then darkness took all dominance.
Frank blacked out shortly before we reached the door. There was something very wrong with him. And now he was wet, shanking and unconcious. Worry and pain came to me. Bringing me to close tears. Seeing Frankie this lost and confused was upsetting. He was like a candle that would light up my life and bring warmth to restore my heart. With him being as down as he has been, it hurts. Like if Frankie hurts, I hurt.
I lay him down on the sofa, his lips were starting to turn blue. I removed his damp hoodie and left him lying on the couch to get some wolly blankets from the cupboard at the end of the hall.
When I came back, a short while later I found Mikey sitting on the coffee table, facing Frankie and looking nervous.
"Mikey" I said and he jumped.
"Gerard! What's wrong with Frank? Will he be okay? I thought he went home! Did someone hurt him? Will he-"
"Mikes! He'll be fine. He's just not feeling well." It was half true, but there was something else and even Mikey could tell that.
We stayed with Frank for a few more minutes before Mikey went to call his Mom to tell her that Frank might be late coming home, I told Mikey not to tell her that he fainted. Frank probably didnt want his mother to know if he hasn't even told me yet whats going on.
Frank started to stir, slowly blinking his eyes open.
"Hey" i smiled at him.
"Gee" He groaned quietly.
"I guess so.. Um.. tired. I think I will stay over Gee, if it's okay."
"Its fine" i kissed his head, he looked so weak and pained, tucked up with millions of blankets.
"You have my bed, Frank. Here, I'll help you up."
"No, I;m fine here. I just need to sleep."
I frowned at him, but he had already drifted off. I sighed and picked him up, ignoring his words and took him down to my room. He curled up in my arms but didn't wake. I gentally lay him down on my bed and pulled the covers over him.
I walked upstairs and bumbed into Mikey.
"Fankie's staying over, he woke up but is asleep."
Mikey seemed relieved but still couldn't hide the look of worry that lay behind his hazel eyes.
"What's the problem Mikes? You know I can read you, and I can tell that you're keeping something."
"That.. Is a problem for another day. Night bro" He patted my shoulder and ran up the stairs, looking more scared than ever. i didn't bother going after him, even if I try, i won't break him for telling me. Not tonight anyway.
I felt miserable..
The only two people in this world who could change that were feeling the same too, which made matters that much worse.
I never thought there was a time to think this..
It's time to live and let die.
I won't stop trying to help Frankie and Mikey get better, they deserved the best and I'm unable to give it to them, that doesn't mean i have to give up though.
They are worth fighting for...
They are worth dying for...