FicWad

I sat on the sofa, musing over things. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to just confront them and just ask why. The door opened and Frank and Mikey stumbled into the house, laughing and joking loudly. They sounded extremely drunk. Wouldn’t surprise me. They’ve just been to a huge MTV awards. I glanced at the clock on the wall, as they stumbled around in the hallway. 12:43. I sighed and silently thought out how I was going to handle this. Do I tackle them for answers while they are drunk, and more likely to be honest with me? Wait till the morning? Or go through with the plan and play dumb to it all?

I snapped my head up, when a drunken Frank fell through the door. I watched him attempt to pick himself up, where he lay giggling face first on the floor.

“Frank you idiot, they’ll find you there. Everyone knows the best hiding place is in the refrigerator. You're stupid!” Mikey giggled, before helping Frank to his feet. I sat there watching disbelievingly. They were completely oblivious, and intoxicated. In all honesty, they looked extremely childish and innocent. I couldn’t confront them in this state. “Oh look! It’s Maxie!” Mikey exclaimed, ditching Frank, and bounding over to me, leaving Frank to fall flat on his face again. Mikey flung his arms around me, and clung to me tightly. I felt my chest tighten and the tears stung the back of my eyes, at the realization. These weren’t the friend’s I’d been allowed to think they were. I peeled Mikey’s arm from around my neck and stood up. He continued to cling to me, wrapping his arms around my waist, and burying his head into my stomach like a little child.

“Mikey dude, I uh-” I started, but looked away from him. I wiped my eyes furiously, and swatted him away. “I’m going for a walk.” I said, before grabbing my coat and my keys. I stepped over Frank who was now lying on his back with his eyes closed. He looked as though he was sleeping. My heart broke and I exited the house, making my way in the direction of Dylan’s slowly; in hopes the cool night air would clear my mind.

*

I walked past the cemetery, and held my breath. My heart stopped and I opened the gates, walking around following the cemented path ways. I watched my feet, being too afraid to look up at the gravestones; afraid of the names I might see carved into the marbled stones. Funny how people always seem to end up in a cemetery in their time of need, and reflection. Personally, I feel it’s the sense of safety it brings. Nothing here but lost loved ones, and sometimes the thing someone needs the most is just to feel loved and secure. I sat on a near by bench and looked up at the inky sky, as the stars crawled out from under their dark silky blanket, glistening and shining down at me. It was comforting. I smiled and closed my eyes, allowing the cool breeze of the summer night to whip through my hair soothingly.

I opened my eyes and was greeted by a feeling of being observed. I looked up, dismissing the nightmare still haunting my thoughts, to meet with a pair of aged brown eyes. My heart stopped momentarily with fright at the elderly woman staring down at me.

“Sorry.” I mumbled, running my hand through my hair, and sitting up, at the realisation that I’d fallen asleep on the bench in the cemetery. The woman continued to stare at me in shock, holding the bouquet of pink tulips in her hand. She probably thought I was some homeless drug addict or something. I stood up awkwardly, and shoved my hands in my pocket, and walking towards he exit. Well that was embarrassing

I walked home, not looking up; just thinking excuses for why they kept it from me, and wondering what the real them were like. I snapped my head up at the sound of my name meeting my ears. Frank was running down the driveway in nothing but his boxer shorts. I sighed and looked away. Just the sight of him made it hurt even more; that he couldn’t even trust me enough to tell me. A pair of arms flung around me tightly, and I tried to control the anger and hurt attempting to resurface from my calm mood.

“Where the fuck have you been? I’ve been so worried about you.” he whispered into my ear I could hear the sincerity, and desperation in his voice.

“I fell asleep on a bench.” I said quietly. I was surprised at the sound of my own voice. It sounded emotionless, which was different to how I was feeling at that minute. Inside, I was full of lots of different emotions swirling around. Anger, hurt, confusion...

“What? Are you ok? You haven’t been raped or mugged have you? Drugged?” Frank asked, pulling away from me, and holding me by the shoulders, looking into my eyes. My heart sunk and I averted my gaze to the floor. I didn’t see the usual bright playful eyes I usually saw; instead I saw nothing but the lies he’d fed to me these past months.

“I uh-” I started. I hadn’t even thought about that, I’d been too preoccupied with my thoughts. Besides, im pretty sure the elderly lady hadn’t mugged me for my house key. “I'm gonna go take a shower.” I said, pulling away from him, and ignoring his question, and the worry clearly evident in his voice, and expression. I made my way up the driveway, my hands shoved in my pockets as I watched my feet move across the tarmacked floor rhythmically.

I could feel Frank’s confused gaze watch me up the driveway to the door. I walked through the door, and a very relieved, but hung over Mikey greeted me. I ignored his presence, and ran up the stairs. It was to hard to look at them at the minute. I really thought I’d found some good friends for the first time since I can remember, but obviously not. I guess I was still clinging to the hope that it was all just a dream.

*

I lay on the sofa, switching through the channels. I put a channel on, to see it flash to the advertisements, before I came on the screen. I growled, and turned the TV off, becoming annoyed at my advertisement, even though I’d only seen it once. I felt a presence enter the room and closed my eyes, hoping they’d leave me alone. Whoever it was, sat down on the sofa next to me.

“I know you're not asleep.” Frank’s calm voice said from beside me, breaking the peaceful silence. I opened my eyes, and stared at the blank screen, seeing the reflection of us in the TV, staring back at me. I sighed and allowed my eyes to flutter closed, just wishing for him to admit to me why he kept it from me. I wanted to just ask him, but something inside me held me back. Almost like it was refraining in, in hopes it wasn’t really them I saw on the TV last night.

“Are you ok? You seem a bit... off today.” Frank asked quietly, seeming to be struggling to find the right words. I opened my eyes and turned to the right, looking him in the eyes before turning away again. I couldn’t stand to look him in the eyes.

“Yeah.” I said emotionlessly, willing myself to pluck up the courage to ask him. Frank sighed, seeming unconvinced, and annoyed at the cold shoulder I was giving him.

“You know you can talk to me about anything at anytime right?” he asked, and I just wanted to scream and lunge towards him in temper. How could I trust him with anything after this? How can he be so oblivious. He obviously had no plans of telling me anytime soon. I nodded even though I didn’t mean it. “Ready for your present now?” he asked me, breaking the awkward silence, and catching me off guard.