Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Goodbye And Goodluck
DESOLE
Everything with Milo had been working out splendidly. Sometimes he would skip on parties to hang out with me and Gerard on the bus. We would spend the night chatting, munching and reliving the past together. As promised, he kept my secret, refusing to give anybody any information, not that they asked of course. Gerard and I were still playing it safe. I’d told Milo about our near-pregnancy experience and he scolded both of us for being so stupid. But trust me, we had learned out lesson.
Tonight we were alone and grateful to have each other all to ourselves. We sat all curled up in my bunk in out underwear. Gerard was playing with my hair and I was smiling to myself. I could almost feel the love radiating from him in the form of some kind of warm glow. He twirled his calloused finger tips around the loose strands of my straggly mouse colored hair, studying it like it was something endlessly fascinating.
“You know what I think?” I asked, wanting to break the quiet despite how nice it was. Gerard stopped what he was doing and looked up at me, my hair still in between his fingers.
“What do you think?” he asked, dropping the strand of my hair and adjusting himself so that I was better nestled under his arm.
“I think that the lips get too much attention when it comes to kissing.” I said thoughtfully. Gerard raised his eyebrows as if to say, “oh really”. “There are so many other great places that would be just perfect, don’t you think?”
“I’m not quite sure, why don’t you demonstrate so I ca get a clearer view.” he hinted. I laughed a little and pulled away so that I could “demonstrate” properly.
“Well, there’s the neck of course.” I said, scooting up and pressing my lips to the warm skin of this throat. I felt his muscles tense underneath my lips and this gave me an odd sort of satisfaction.
“And the you have the stomach…” I said, pulling myself downward to that my chin rested right above his belly button. I leaned my head forward to rung my lips very gingerly over his porcelain skin and I felt him shiver.
“I see your point.” he said, his voice a breathy gasp. I chuckled and scooted up on top of him.
“I think my favorite though…is the wrists.” I mumbled, pulling his left hand up to my mouth. I kissed and messaged the skin beneath my lips, feeling Gerard tense up on me again. I looked up at him slyly before sinking my teeth into his wrist. He threw his head back in what was either shock, pain or pleasure; I couldn’t tell.
“Holy shit Des!” he gasped when I let up. I laughed a bit and moved myself so that I was sitting on top of his with my legs on either side of him.
“Remember when we used to hog the hotel bathroom and take baths together?” I asked, tilting my head to one side the way a six year old might do. Gerard laughed and smiled.
“Yeah and the next day I would come out covered in bruises and bight marks.” he reminded me. I blushed and held his bitten wrist in my hand, running over the little ligature marks with my fingers.
“You never stopped me.” I said. “Is Lindsey a biter like me?” I smirked. Gerard shook his head and continued to trace the bite marks.
“No, she isn’t a biter. Kinda wished she was though.” he said thoughtfully. I grinned and kissed him playfully.
“You enjoy it?” I hinted, my lips still against his. I could feel him smiling.
“Mm, yeah. But you know what I really enjoy?” He asked. I looked at him for a second before answering. He was putting on his classic bedroom eyes that would occasionally come out on stage. He knew I couldn’t resist him that way.
“What?” I asked happily.
“I love taking you in my arms.” He said, pulling me down closer to him. “And I love holding you so tight, just like this.” he said, squeezing me up against him. I laughed and snuggled up against him.
“Hey Gerard…do you remember that first time we ever hooked up? Y’know, as a couple?” I asked quietly when my laughter died away.
“That night in the back of the van? How could I forget?” he said wistfully as he recalled that great, great night we shared.
“Well, it was kind of, my um first time.” I admitted, feeling my cheek blush heavily. Gerard stopped in his tracks and looked at me.
“Wait, you mean…like ever?” he asked, looking completely bewildered. I nodded and tried to bite back the grin that was trying to leak all over my face. “So what your saying is you lost your virginity to me?”
“Yes. Why is that so hard to believe? I was only nineteen at the time.” I joked. Gerard chuckled, still looking amazed by that simple fact.
“I dunno. I guess I just figured from the way you acted that you weren’t. Why didn’t you ever tell me?” he said with a shrug. I shrugged too.
“I guess I didn’t wanna seem naive.” I said. “Or I didn’t want to dissuade you from doing anything.”
“Well, if you’d told me I could’ve made that night a little more special than the back of a van.” He said. I laughed.
“That night was special, really special. And not because of where we were or how we did it. It was because I was doing it with you.” I reassured him.
“Well, that explains why you kept saying ‘ow’.” he said thoughtfully. I laughed again.
“Well, having your hymen broken does hurt.” I informed him sarcastically. Gerard frowned a little bit.
“I never wanted to hurt you Des. If you’d have told me, I would’ve stopped.” he said regretfully. “I’m sorry that I did.”
“No, don’t be sorry. I’m not sorry about it, I don‘t regret anything about that night or any others that we shared, honestly. I wanted to loose my virginity to you. I wanted it to happen.” I assured him.
“Really?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at me. I nodded and smiled. “Well shit, I didn’t know I had taken your virginity. That’s so weird. Your style’s been effected almost entirely by me.” he thought aloud.
“You didn’t take it Gerard, I gave it to you.” I said. I really didn’t want him to feel guilty about that night because I sure as hell didn’t regret a damn thing.
“God that is so strange…” he mumbled. “We have like, this bond now.”
“This doesn’t change anything about that night right? You don’t like, regret it or anything because I told you?” I asked, letting my anxiety show through.
“No, no, no, of course not! That night was spectacular. If anything I wished you’d told me but that doesn’t really matter. Don’t even think that I regret that night. I am honored that you would give me something that special.” he said happily. I felt relieved but the looked over at the clock.
“Shit its late. You should probably get going.” I mumbled sourly. Gerard looked over and saw that I was right.
“Yeah, I should. But hey, I love you.” he said, leaning down to give me one last kiss for the night.
Everything with Milo had been working out splendidly. Sometimes he would skip on parties to hang out with me and Gerard on the bus. We would spend the night chatting, munching and reliving the past together. As promised, he kept my secret, refusing to give anybody any information, not that they asked of course. Gerard and I were still playing it safe. I’d told Milo about our near-pregnancy experience and he scolded both of us for being so stupid. But trust me, we had learned out lesson.
Tonight we were alone and grateful to have each other all to ourselves. We sat all curled up in my bunk in out underwear. Gerard was playing with my hair and I was smiling to myself. I could almost feel the love radiating from him in the form of some kind of warm glow. He twirled his calloused finger tips around the loose strands of my straggly mouse colored hair, studying it like it was something endlessly fascinating.
“You know what I think?” I asked, wanting to break the quiet despite how nice it was. Gerard stopped what he was doing and looked up at me, my hair still in between his fingers.
“What do you think?” he asked, dropping the strand of my hair and adjusting himself so that I was better nestled under his arm.
“I think that the lips get too much attention when it comes to kissing.” I said thoughtfully. Gerard raised his eyebrows as if to say, “oh really”. “There are so many other great places that would be just perfect, don’t you think?”
“I’m not quite sure, why don’t you demonstrate so I ca get a clearer view.” he hinted. I laughed a little and pulled away so that I could “demonstrate” properly.
“Well, there’s the neck of course.” I said, scooting up and pressing my lips to the warm skin of this throat. I felt his muscles tense underneath my lips and this gave me an odd sort of satisfaction.
“And the you have the stomach…” I said, pulling myself downward to that my chin rested right above his belly button. I leaned my head forward to rung my lips very gingerly over his porcelain skin and I felt him shiver.
“I see your point.” he said, his voice a breathy gasp. I chuckled and scooted up on top of him.
“I think my favorite though…is the wrists.” I mumbled, pulling his left hand up to my mouth. I kissed and messaged the skin beneath my lips, feeling Gerard tense up on me again. I looked up at him slyly before sinking my teeth into his wrist. He threw his head back in what was either shock, pain or pleasure; I couldn’t tell.
“Holy shit Des!” he gasped when I let up. I laughed a bit and moved myself so that I was sitting on top of his with my legs on either side of him.
“Remember when we used to hog the hotel bathroom and take baths together?” I asked, tilting my head to one side the way a six year old might do. Gerard laughed and smiled.
“Yeah and the next day I would come out covered in bruises and bight marks.” he reminded me. I blushed and held his bitten wrist in my hand, running over the little ligature marks with my fingers.
“You never stopped me.” I said. “Is Lindsey a biter like me?” I smirked. Gerard shook his head and continued to trace the bite marks.
“No, she isn’t a biter. Kinda wished she was though.” he said thoughtfully. I grinned and kissed him playfully.
“You enjoy it?” I hinted, my lips still against his. I could feel him smiling.
“Mm, yeah. But you know what I really enjoy?” He asked. I looked at him for a second before answering. He was putting on his classic bedroom eyes that would occasionally come out on stage. He knew I couldn’t resist him that way.
“What?” I asked happily.
“I love taking you in my arms.” He said, pulling me down closer to him. “And I love holding you so tight, just like this.” he said, squeezing me up against him. I laughed and snuggled up against him.
“Hey Gerard…do you remember that first time we ever hooked up? Y’know, as a couple?” I asked quietly when my laughter died away.
“That night in the back of the van? How could I forget?” he said wistfully as he recalled that great, great night we shared.
“Well, it was kind of, my um first time.” I admitted, feeling my cheek blush heavily. Gerard stopped in his tracks and looked at me.
“Wait, you mean…like ever?” he asked, looking completely bewildered. I nodded and tried to bite back the grin that was trying to leak all over my face. “So what your saying is you lost your virginity to me?”
“Yes. Why is that so hard to believe? I was only nineteen at the time.” I joked. Gerard chuckled, still looking amazed by that simple fact.
“I dunno. I guess I just figured from the way you acted that you weren’t. Why didn’t you ever tell me?” he said with a shrug. I shrugged too.
“I guess I didn’t wanna seem naive.” I said. “Or I didn’t want to dissuade you from doing anything.”
“Well, if you’d told me I could’ve made that night a little more special than the back of a van.” He said. I laughed.
“That night was special, really special. And not because of where we were or how we did it. It was because I was doing it with you.” I reassured him.
“Well, that explains why you kept saying ‘ow’.” he said thoughtfully. I laughed again.
“Well, having your hymen broken does hurt.” I informed him sarcastically. Gerard frowned a little bit.
“I never wanted to hurt you Des. If you’d have told me, I would’ve stopped.” he said regretfully. “I’m sorry that I did.”
“No, don’t be sorry. I’m not sorry about it, I don‘t regret anything about that night or any others that we shared, honestly. I wanted to loose my virginity to you. I wanted it to happen.” I assured him.
“Really?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at me. I nodded and smiled. “Well shit, I didn’t know I had taken your virginity. That’s so weird. Your style’s been effected almost entirely by me.” he thought aloud.
“You didn’t take it Gerard, I gave it to you.” I said. I really didn’t want him to feel guilty about that night because I sure as hell didn’t regret a damn thing.
“God that is so strange…” he mumbled. “We have like, this bond now.”
“This doesn’t change anything about that night right? You don’t like, regret it or anything because I told you?” I asked, letting my anxiety show through.
“No, no, no, of course not! That night was spectacular. If anything I wished you’d told me but that doesn’t really matter. Don’t even think that I regret that night. I am honored that you would give me something that special.” he said happily. I felt relieved but the looked over at the clock.
“Shit its late. You should probably get going.” I mumbled sourly. Gerard looked over and saw that I was right.
“Yeah, I should. But hey, I love you.” he said, leaning down to give me one last kiss for the night.
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