Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Saviour of the Broken

Chapter twentynine-Shadows in the Night

by xxKilljoysxx 7 reviews

'This situiation is looking like a contest of who can act like they care less.'

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama,Romance - Characters: Frank Iero,Gerard Way,Mikey Way - Published: 2011-05-04 - Updated: 2011-05-04 - 2368 words - Complete

I'm Baack!:D Thank you everyone who wished me a happy birthday :3 tehe xx I hope that this chapter is good, tell me what you think(:


I stayed home for the whole day. Actually, I stayed in the same room for the whole day...
My bedroom was the only place where I could be left alone, and that's what I wanted. I want to be by my self, there is no one here for me anymore. The time past surprisingly quickly. The saying time flies when you're having fun.. Myth. Time flies when there is nothing better to do with it.
Time flies when it's wasted.
The whole day was spent in deafining silence, my room was dimly lit. It felt like I was the only one still living, but even that's a lie. I don't even know if I'm living or not. Every part of me is dead. The only small indication of life is the faint beat of my heart as the blood rushe through my viens. I lay on my bed, watching my chest rise and fall, nibbling on my nails, starring blankly into nothing. Barely any tears escaped me now, i think I've cried them all away. My mind was bombed with roits of thoughts, most bad. I thought about next week when I'll have to go to school, what would that be like?
My thoughts were seized by the front door shutting. I didn't move, I remained lying on my back on my bed. I closed my eyes, hoping to block out everything again. The door creaked open and I heard quiet footsteps walk half way down the stairs.
"Gerard?" It was Mikey.
I pretended to be asleep.
I heard Mikey sigh.
I kept my eyes closed, determined not to speak to him.
Soon, he left.
I sighed quietly and opened my eyes. I know it was childish, but I don't care. I don't want to see Mikey, Mom, Frank or anybody else.

This world revolves around lies.
Nothing more, just lies.
I'm part of it. I lie too.
I'm lying to myself this very minute.
The truth, I miss love. I miss having Mikey and Frank around.
Turns out that freedom from them is nothing but missing them more than ever.
Frank was the closest thiing I had to love. Even though we havn't known each other long, everything was right when he was here.

I miss his sweet smile, his giggle, counting the colors in his eyes.. But it's gone. I can't forget what has happened.. What he did.

One second it was perfect, the next.. ruins.
I'm so distressed.
Everything's coming down to nothing.
I looked at my cellphone, truth is I was waiting for Frank to call, I just never let myself believe it.
I'm so low, I don't think I can feel anything at all now..


I walked home with Mikey to his house. I had no chance today at talking it over. He didn't show up at Lunch, Bob told me he had some music thing. I asked if we could talk in Maths class and he invited me over. It didn't feel right, being under the same roof as Gerard yet so far away.

Mikey closed the front door behind him.
"Just go into the lounge, I'll be there in a sec."
I nodded and made my way to the lounge, Mikey was going to see Gerard.
I dumped my bag beside the couch and flopped onto it, making myself comfortable, preparing for a very uncomfortable conversation.
Mikey returned sooner than I had expected, he looked disappointed.
"Nah, It's fine."
Mikey sat down beside me, a fair distance between the two of us, our wall of awkwardness standing tall and strong now.
"H-How's Gerard?" I asked softly.
Mikey sat up more on the couch and folded his legs. "Sleeping"
I nodded.
"How are you?"
I shrugged.
"Mikey, you know why I wanted to talk to you, don't you?"
Mikey nodded, his hair falling over his face. I hated seeing him like this.
"Are we g-going to talk about it?"
"Frank, to be honest, I'd rather.. forget it."
Forget it? Why would he do it unless he wanted to?!
I looked at him.
"I mean, it's not like it really meant something, right? Just a mistake."
Something crashed inside me, here I was believing that maybe Mikey has feelings towards me, causing me to have slight feelings towards him when he's not thought anything of it all along.
I drew in a breath to say something when I heard a noise. I quickly turned my head and Gerard passed the door.
"Gee" I breathed, only Mikey heard.
Gee stopped at the door and looked at me. He took in a deep breath and bit his lip.
Then he left.
I stood up and ran to the door. I saw him opening his door.
"Gerard." I said.
He looked at me again. Silence.
I stayed standing at the door frame, I didn't drop my eyes from Gerard, and Gerard didn't drop his. I could feel Mikey watching me from his seat on the couch. Gerard's eyes were glassy. He had a dull vibe that surrounded him..
It's killing me.
And I'm wanting to know if it's killing him too.
It's dead quiet. I've never heard silence quite this loud..
He leaves. He takes one last look at me and I can't help but feel small. Then he walked down his stairs..
This situiation is looking like a contest of who can act like they care less.
And I can't breath.
Mikey quietly walked to my side.
"Frank?"He whispered.
I kept my eyes fixed on Gerard's closed door.
"Hey," Mikey put his arm over my shoulder as the first tear fell "Don't cry, it'll work out, just like you said it would."
He knew that that wasn't true, how could I ever fix this when Gerard won't even talk to me..

I stayed at Mikey's until late. His Mom came home and made us dinner. She knows that something is wrong with Gerard, and it's obvious that its disturbing her.
I thank her for letting me stay and Mikey and I go back to the living room to watch tv. I feel cold.. numb.
It's getting darker by the minute. Dusk is slipping away, turning to the sharp, dead night. The movie finishes, I was never really watching it.
I look over at Mikey, he's curled up in a ball on the couch, his head resting on his arm and breathing softly. He's sleeping. Sleep is the only place that I can think of now where things can go the way you want it, where anything can happen. The only problem is you never realise it was a dream until you wake up, that's when you realise that there was something different or wrong in the first place. By that point it's too late, but those few hours of which one may get sleep keeps you sane. It takes you awway from this world and you enter one that is entirely your own. I only wish that i could sleep. It's near impossible to sleep with too much cramming your mind..
Mikey's Mom has gone to bed, the house is silent.
I look at the clock, it's ten.
Slowly, I creep to the hall, trying to force myself to think of anyone but Gerard..
I see a small crack of light shining from the bottom of his door. I restrain myself from going down there, no good will come of it..

I walk into Mikey's kitchen and switch the lights on. My phone vibrates.
Where are you? Come home now. Mom
I sigh, should I wake Mikey up?
This is what it's going to be like, Gerard and I having to sneak past each other, never being big enough to speak..
If he's not going to listen, then I'll write him. I'll do anything for his attention. There is no other way.
I take a rather small sheet of paper from a notepad and took out a pen. What can I say? What does he want me to say?
I take a seat on one of the shiny black stools and look down at the blank paper..
After a short while pondering and scribling, I had written a letter. It wasn't a letter of apology or explaination, I knew he wouldn't be interested in that.
I got up from the chair and walked to his door, the light was out now and nothing but darkness filled the house.
I opened his door and walked inside, it seems like it's been so long since i was last in here..
Cautiously, I stepped towards his desk, a dim moonlight gleamed through the small window, providing a faint light that cascaded over the desk, revieling his fantastic art works. Then I saw it, it was on a small square of paper, lying underneith many more but poking out through the rest. It was me. Just a simple sketch. Gerard had signed it. I gentally grazed my finger over his squiggly intitials. It was perfect.
I placed that sketch over all the rest and put the note ontop of it. I looked down at the picture of myself and the letter from me. Then for the first time, turned to face Gerard's bed. He was asleep, but his face still looked troubled.
I carefully made my way over to him. His arms were wrapped securely around his body and his hair fell over his eyes.
I gentally brushed it away and crouched down next to his bedside.
"I'm sorry for what I've done to you. I never wanted this." I whisper, gentally placeing a peck on his forehead.
He didn't stir.
I left.

I walked past the lounge where Mikey was still sleeping.
Mikey woke up with a fright.
"Sorry, I've got to go home now."
"Oh, yeah. Okay. I'll see you tomorrow, dude."
I nodded and gave him a short wave before exiting his house.

I unlocked the door to my home and stepped inside. Just as I was expecting, Mom and Dad were waiting up.
"Where have you been this time?" Dad asked sternly
"Mikey's" I mumble and keep walking past the living room where they were sitting and towards the stairs.
"Hold up one second, Frank" Said Mom.
I sigh and turn back to them.
"Now, you behaviour hasn't been-"
"How many times do we have to have this arguement?"
"It's not up to us, if you change your attitude then we wouldn't be having it in the first place."
"If it's up to me.. Then I'm going to bed, I'm really not in the mood for this, my day's been shit enough. If it's up to me my parents would be fine with who I am. So obviously it's not." I turned, feeling pleased that I didn't really lose my temper.
"Frank!" My dad yelled.
Spoke too soon.
"What." I stopped at the foot of the stairs and my dad came through the living room to stand opposite me.
"You're making this really unfair."
"It's not easy having you.. you be.."
"What, your son? Because there's not much we can do about that."
"No, I wasn't going to say that I-"
"You were thinking it." I said quietly.
My dad narrowed his eyes on me.
"You know I can hear you, right?"
He looked questioningly at me.
"These walls," I tapped the wall next to me, "Paper thin. I hear you every night. Every night for as long as I can remember I've heard you bitch about how shit I am. All these years you've watched me grow into the person you hate, but you don't do anything. You just complain."
Mom was here now. She didn't look happy..
"No. You're wrong! You always are and you'll always be!" He yelled.
"You think you know what everyone needs!"
"It's because I have to make decisions for you because you're too thick to make them on your own!"
"You make it like everyday I make mistakes."
"I don't want to hear it anymore, Frank!"
"You're always there to point out my mistakes and shove it in my face, i've had enough of it!"
"You're a child! You don't understand, We know what's right for you!"
"If you would only come to church with us-" Mom piped in.
"Mom, I told you. I don't want to, it's only what you two want."
"Frank! You're coming with us, you don't get a say!"
"It's not a choice!"
"It is a choice! You can't control me my whole life!"
"I have every right to control your life, you barely have one anyway!"
Rage boiled in my blood, my jaw locked and my hands were balled into tight, whitening fists.
"Nothing you say is going to bring me down! Get out of my way." I slipped between them and heading to the front door.
"Frank Iero if you think for a second that you're leaving this house then-"
"Don't waste your time with punishments, you've given them to me my whole life, you would think that you would get that they do nothing." I opened the door.
Mom stepped forward.
"Frank, where are you going?"
"for a walk." I eyed my Dad angrily and slammed the door on my mother's worried face. She always found a way of making me feel guilty.
I pulled my 'Black Flag' hoodie over my head and trudged down the street. Away from home. Anywhere but here.

I don't know where I'm going, but I know not to look back. It's a sign of weakness. It shows that i'm seeing if anyones there, running after me telling me to come back. There's no one there. And at this point, it's likely there never will be..

Sorry, I don't think that this chapter is as good as I was hoping, I'll try write better for the next chapter, I promise!
To make things make a little more sense, it's thursday night right now in the story. tehe. Please R&R! I'll love you so much:D xx
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