Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Falling.
Part 5: Informed Consent
Completely disregarding the "no cell phone" rule, Frank had called Mikey and Ray 1,000 times over. Seriously, what was up with people ignoring calls these past two days? He was freaking out. He was trying to find someone who knew what had happened to Gerard. It was difficult because he kept forgetting Gerard had an "AKA name" the hospital assigned to him due to him being famous. So when he stopped a couple of nurses asking about Gerard Way, they just gave him an odd look and kept walking.
The hospital bed hadn't been made up or anything, so he didn't think Gerard died. Oh god, but what if he did? He was about to approach someone again when he finally felt his phone vibrate. Mikey.
"Dude where the fuck did you guys go?" Frank said louder than he should have. People stared at him in alarm. He felt guilty when Mikey answered, sounding like he was on the verge of tears. He explained that Gerard had needed an urgent surgery. He gave Frank their location. Frank responded in a far more gentle tone and headed over.
He met up with Mikey and Ray in a waiting area. Frank sat down next to a distressed Mikey on one of the plastic chairs and slung an arm around him, rubbing his shoulder soothingly. He looked at Ray silently asking for an explanation with his expression. Ray seemed to get the message.
"Gerard crashed again." he explained. "They had been putting off surgery because they didn't know if he was strong enough for it, but now they're saying they can't wait any longer. We had no choice. They made Mikey make a huge decision in a matter of seconds. We chose to risk it."
"Damn, Mikes I'm so sorry...." Frank squeezed Mikey, who still looked frazzled. "He'll be okay."
Yet Frank didn't know that. He knew deep down inside that he could never promise it. But the thought that Gerard might come out of this not okay was too much for Frank to bear. Especially considering their last conversation.
Frank wanted more than anything to burst inside that operating room and give Gerard a big hug, tell him he was sorry. Tell him he loved him and that nothing was going to hurt him anymore. Really, he wanted to say that ever since he had heard the voicemail. He just hadn’t been able to bring himself to say it, and he regretted that now. Instead, he had just stormed off on him. ‘Great job, Frank…’ Frank sarcastically patted himself on the back.
Mikey was not doing much better. He kept running it over and over in his mind. The machines going off. The doctor explaining hurriedly what was happening. The consent form being shoved in his face, asking for a decision. They had told him “Either you don’t sign and he dies in minutes or you do and he’ll either die an hour later on the table or he’ll live.” While the choice was obvious, invasive surgery was very risky for Gerard at the moment. What if he had made the wrong call? What if Gerard dies in surgery, but he would have been stabilized anyway had he not gone in? He would have murdered his brother, his best friend. ‘You already kinda did that by not answering your phone that night…’ a pestering voice reminded him. God, the next time he saw Bert McCracken, he was going to fucking slaughter him. Fuck the consequences.
Ray was in more of a panic than anyone else would know. He would never show it. The other two were already bad enough. He tried to remain the calm one. Yet it was hard knowing the life of one of his best friends was on the line. Not only his best friend, but his own career. Of course one was more important than the other, but the band was a major force in all of their lives. And Ray knew that without Gerard, My Chemical Romance had little to no chance of continuing. Frank had always said they could never replace Gerard, and it had always been sort of a silent agreement. Gerard had always insisted it wasn’t his band, but it always was at least to some degree. He was their leader, backed by his two best friends and his little brother. It wouldn’t feel right without him. That including the devastation the death would leave on all of them, and their families. Ray and Gerard always joked that they could communicate with one another telepathically. Ridiculous as it was, Ray then tried sending some thoughts to Gerard from one room away. He shut his eyes, concentrated hard, and tried to envision actually talking to Gerard. He told him ‘C’mon buddy, hang in there. We need you. And we all love you so, so much. Don’t give up on us now….’
An hour of silent prayers later, the surgeon emerged out of the operating room and beckoned them forward.
Completely disregarding the "no cell phone" rule, Frank had called Mikey and Ray 1,000 times over. Seriously, what was up with people ignoring calls these past two days? He was freaking out. He was trying to find someone who knew what had happened to Gerard. It was difficult because he kept forgetting Gerard had an "AKA name" the hospital assigned to him due to him being famous. So when he stopped a couple of nurses asking about Gerard Way, they just gave him an odd look and kept walking.
The hospital bed hadn't been made up or anything, so he didn't think Gerard died. Oh god, but what if he did? He was about to approach someone again when he finally felt his phone vibrate. Mikey.
"Dude where the fuck did you guys go?" Frank said louder than he should have. People stared at him in alarm. He felt guilty when Mikey answered, sounding like he was on the verge of tears. He explained that Gerard had needed an urgent surgery. He gave Frank their location. Frank responded in a far more gentle tone and headed over.
He met up with Mikey and Ray in a waiting area. Frank sat down next to a distressed Mikey on one of the plastic chairs and slung an arm around him, rubbing his shoulder soothingly. He looked at Ray silently asking for an explanation with his expression. Ray seemed to get the message.
"Gerard crashed again." he explained. "They had been putting off surgery because they didn't know if he was strong enough for it, but now they're saying they can't wait any longer. We had no choice. They made Mikey make a huge decision in a matter of seconds. We chose to risk it."
"Damn, Mikes I'm so sorry...." Frank squeezed Mikey, who still looked frazzled. "He'll be okay."
Yet Frank didn't know that. He knew deep down inside that he could never promise it. But the thought that Gerard might come out of this not okay was too much for Frank to bear. Especially considering their last conversation.
Frank wanted more than anything to burst inside that operating room and give Gerard a big hug, tell him he was sorry. Tell him he loved him and that nothing was going to hurt him anymore. Really, he wanted to say that ever since he had heard the voicemail. He just hadn’t been able to bring himself to say it, and he regretted that now. Instead, he had just stormed off on him. ‘Great job, Frank…’ Frank sarcastically patted himself on the back.
Mikey was not doing much better. He kept running it over and over in his mind. The machines going off. The doctor explaining hurriedly what was happening. The consent form being shoved in his face, asking for a decision. They had told him “Either you don’t sign and he dies in minutes or you do and he’ll either die an hour later on the table or he’ll live.” While the choice was obvious, invasive surgery was very risky for Gerard at the moment. What if he had made the wrong call? What if Gerard dies in surgery, but he would have been stabilized anyway had he not gone in? He would have murdered his brother, his best friend. ‘You already kinda did that by not answering your phone that night…’ a pestering voice reminded him. God, the next time he saw Bert McCracken, he was going to fucking slaughter him. Fuck the consequences.
Ray was in more of a panic than anyone else would know. He would never show it. The other two were already bad enough. He tried to remain the calm one. Yet it was hard knowing the life of one of his best friends was on the line. Not only his best friend, but his own career. Of course one was more important than the other, but the band was a major force in all of their lives. And Ray knew that without Gerard, My Chemical Romance had little to no chance of continuing. Frank had always said they could never replace Gerard, and it had always been sort of a silent agreement. Gerard had always insisted it wasn’t his band, but it always was at least to some degree. He was their leader, backed by his two best friends and his little brother. It wouldn’t feel right without him. That including the devastation the death would leave on all of them, and their families. Ray and Gerard always joked that they could communicate with one another telepathically. Ridiculous as it was, Ray then tried sending some thoughts to Gerard from one room away. He shut his eyes, concentrated hard, and tried to envision actually talking to Gerard. He told him ‘C’mon buddy, hang in there. We need you. And we all love you so, so much. Don’t give up on us now….’
An hour of silent prayers later, the surgeon emerged out of the operating room and beckoned them forward.
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